I wonder if my struggles with game design is due to some combination of laziness, general confusion, or some sort of internal inadequacy that I can't identify. I admit I am more of a writer than game designer, but I feel like I have the capabilities to make a good game, I just have been having these lingering struggles that I can't just get past. I don't want to disappoint people or lead on the people who have been helping me into nothingness. I don't want to be a pariah or something like that. I just want to prove to you guys that I can make something special, but I always have anxiety if the work I am doing is not good enough, or is not going by quickly. Thoughts like that eat at my mind, and I don't want to be seen as a hated figure on the internet for lying to you guys. My game isn't cancelled or anything, I have just been having lasting issues and this is something I have to fix myself.
It's like climbing a mountain. Every single step is a victory, but there's no point in trying to rush to the summit. It's completely understandable that you'd be anxious to ensure you're coming out with a product that people would like, but remember; art takes time, and anyone worth their salt will understand that it's better to take time for your work and time for yourself than it is to end up hurting yourself and the project as a whole by rushing it out.
I can't pretend to understand everything going on in your head right now, but I can say this; you're not going to be seen as a hated figure even if the worst comes to pass with this sort of thing. It's hardly like you're some YandereDev-type figure taking money from people and then lying to them for years - and if there are people trying to tell you that you're a bad person for taking time for yourself and taking time to polish the game you're working on, my best advice would be to ignore them.
I know I can't force you to think one way or the other, but at the very least, you should know that it's okay to take time for yourself. Even if your game ends up being a years-long project because of other committments you need to handle, or even if it's just because you want to take breaks to gain a fresh perspective when you come back - that's fine. Your game's going to be all the better for it.