Wario Wario Wario

Wario Wario Wario · Jan 2, 2021

Lloyd from Mother and Jeff from EarthBound would both make really cool fighters. They’d do the same things, but I like Lloyd better so I’d go with him. Ninten doesn’t strike me as having an interesting moveset so I’d prefer Lloyd as a Beginnings rep.

Wario Wario Wario · Jan 2, 2021

It’s kinda disturbing how on the comments of the fake anti-piracy screens there are people defending the fictional, obviously evil Nintendo. Really goes to show how insane brand loyalty can be.

Wario Wario Wario · Jan 1, 2021

Don’t you just love it when studios canonise fanon content?

Wario Wario Wario · Jan 1, 2021

Themes of Undertale: Pacifism, diplomacy

Some Undertale fans: send someone death threats over a thicc dragon.

Wario Wario Wario · Jan 1, 2021

You can probably count on one hand how many real anti-piracy screens are scary.

-Puggsy (because of music alone, not the screen)
-DKC2
-DKC3
-Cuphead (possibly)

That’s it. 3 fingers and a partially lifted pinky.

Wario Wario Wario · Jan 1, 2021

I think WAY too much about how sexual dimorphism works in the Mario universe, like these characters are the same species from the same series:

Why would Mario characters even need a sex? They deliver babies by stork, therefore sexuality isn’t a thing - makes sense, E rated fantasy world - which you would assume means the Mario universe doesn’t need sexes, just genders - but there are Mario characters who are explicitly stated to be transgender, meaning they had to be assigned something at birth - HOW DOES THIS WORK?

This rant was originally much longer and much less coherent.

Wario Wario Wario · Dec 31, 2020

Five is the first number not to have a homonym.

Wario Wario Wario · Dec 31, 2020

It’s pretty funny how one of the game companies that is the most often lauded as pro-consumer has a name that literally means “service games”

Wario Wario Wario · Dec 31, 2020

lmao people keep dc’ing me because I choose pac land on battle arenas

Wario Wario Wario · Dec 31, 2020

Sega were so edgy in the 90s that even their preschool education console’s ad featured blatant casual transphobia. (TW: blatant casual transphobia)

Wario Wario Wario · Dec 31, 2020

I don’t get how “you’re not alone” is supposed to be a comforting phrase - oh yeah, that’ll totally help me with my struggles, the weighty knowledge that millions of other people are suffering just like, if not worse than, me.

(Don’t worry, I’m fine RN. I just think about this phrase often)

Wario Wario Wario · Dec 31, 2020

I gotta say, this absolutely feels like a fitting theme song for the letter H

Wario Wario Wario · Dec 31, 2020

WHY IS HE CALLED MCGRUFF THE CRIME DOG IF HE STOPS CRIME SHOULDN’T HE BE CALLED MCGRUFF THE LAW DOG OR SOMETHING

Wario Wario Wario · Dec 31, 2020

Seriously, why can’t you do 3v1s on Battle Arenas?

Wario Wario Wario · Dec 31, 2020

They could’ve easily called the KFConsole the KFComputer.

Wario Wario Wario · Dec 31, 2020

Those chickens are up to

Wario Wario Wario · Dec 30, 2020

Maybe I just don’t understand the term, but I can’t really see where the idea of Soul being a “white saviour” movie comes from. To me it came off more as a film where both main characters saved each other.

Wario Wario Wario · Dec 30, 2020

Someone needs to make a YouTube video about all the misconception around MS and Rare fast. I can’t believe people still say “Microsoft killed Rare!”

Wario Wario Wario · Dec 30, 2020

I had a weird dream where I went to a 90s Nickelodeon-themed theme park and they were selling pirated Wii games. At the end of the dream, a bunch of giant snakes came into the park.

Wario Wario Wario · Dec 30, 2020

I was reporting a post on NintendoLife, and one of their rules is “don’t discuss moderation issues in public”.

That’s hella messed up, and I say that as someone who aligns as authoritarian left.

Wario Wario Wario · Dec 29, 2020

People who think bad comedy can’t bounce back and become funny like bad drama does clearly haven’t seen Minecraft with Gadget.

Wario Wario Wario · Dec 29, 2020

Just saying, if Advent Children content can be included in Smash there’s really no excuse for Eddie, Let Me Go Back to not be a music track.

Wario Wario Wario · Dec 29, 2020

When you look at them closely “wholesome memes” reek of toxic positivity.

Wario Wario Wario · Dec 29, 2020

I often see people question things like the Arby’s Cuphead promotion and the use of Cuphead in the new Nintendo hospital booths thinking Cuphead is just a niche adult animation connoisseur thing - as someone who only left school at the middle of quarantine (there were multiple year groups in said school) I can tell you that couldn’t be further from the truth. Kids go crazy over Cuphead, one kid I knew hated hard games and didn’t understand why I prefer stuff like Crash over say, Yoshi’s Crafted World, and even he loved Cuphead.

Wario Wario Wario · Dec 29, 2020

Imagine if Wario didn’t hijack this ad - it’d just be a blank green rectangle that says “This time it’s MARIO” with the MARIO poorly aligned.

Wario Wario Wario · Dec 29, 2020

Funny story: I was playing Dedede against Wolf, CPU, and out of a box came two Fake Smash Balls that were basically revolving around me - I crouched and waited for the Wolf to attack me, and in turn the fake balls.

He got KO’d.

Wario Wario Wario · Dec 29, 2020

I remember seeing the Birdo maid cosplay as a kid and thinking it was just supposed to be an eerie, Tim Burton sorta thing.

How wrong I was.

Wario Wario Wario · Dec 28, 2020

Finally.

A pro-piracy screen

Wario Wario Wario · Dec 28, 2020

A lot of people really do tend to take the CN “Don’t be racist” PSA out of context. The first half is supposed to be a parody of 1-dimensional, uninformative PSAs, before the second half actually goes in depth on the subject matter. It’s actually rather clever IMO.

Wario Wario Wario · Dec 28, 2020

Imagine if Super Sentai fans reacted to people saying “Power Rangers” the same way Panel De Pon fans react to people calling it “Tetris Attack”

Wario Wario Wario · Dec 28, 2020

People who judge games based solely on their framerate and/or in/exclusion of MTX are idiots. Not even gonna come up with a wacky analogy or synonym, they’re just idiots.

Wario Wario Wario · Dec 28, 2020

The recent anti-piracy meme makes more sense when you consider anti-Nintendo sentiment is at an all time high, so making up stories of them traumatising children and putting dark secrets in their games is just a way of venting really.

Wario Wario Wario · Dec 28, 2020

The weird thing about TV is that the stupider a show presents itself and its character as, the smarter it actually is.

Wario Wario Wario · Dec 28, 2020

To me the problem with Geno isn’t that he’s an obscure character (I am a Muddy Mole supporter after all), but rather that he’s an obscure character from a popular franchise. It’d be like putting in Fang the Sniper, he’d just feel out of place alongside the other Mario characters unless they started adding other semi-obscure one-off Mario characters like Tatanga or Vivian - which to be honest I wouldn’t be opposed to, if they revealed Mallow alongside Geno for example that’d be an easier pill to swallow.

Wario Wario Wario · Dec 28, 2020

It’s weird that people complain about modern Sonic media being “westernised” when Sonic was designed from the start as an amalgamation of timely American figures.

Wario Wario Wario · Dec 28, 2020

Beating Crash 2:
“Woo, I beat the first phase of the boss! bring on the second, Mr. Cortex!”
“Wait, why did I unlock a power up?”
“Oh.”

Wario Wario Wario · Dec 27, 2020

Why are randomised level layouts in platformers even a thing? Doesn’t that defeat the whole point of game design?

Wario Wario Wario · Dec 27, 2020

Great Bay is one of the most poorly designed stages in Smash.

Wario Wario Wario · Dec 26, 2020

I am not at all here for the recent boom in Sonic 06 apoligism.

Wario Wario Wario · Dec 26, 2020

It’s surprising there isn’t a Ghost Gang thread yet.

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