When the year started I was actually writing a story but after a while I ended up scrapping the whole thing for.. personal reasons, but I decided to come up with a different story idea because I wanted to scratch that creative itch. Eventually I settled on my current concept but I didn't start writing it as I wasn't motivated enough. I was still dealing with depression from accidentally burning a lot of bridges last year and I just wasn't really that motivated to do anything. Even meeting with my IRL friends was hard since my social anxiety kept me from getting involved in conversations. Also this year was my first full year in a full-time job, which was rough considering I spent a lot of my time sitting and doing nothing, which also extended to my time at home which I spent a lot of by procrastinating, eating junk food, and feeling empty, so I didn't really accomplish anything of note.
Started taking my medication a few months ago which helped for a bit. Now it kind of feels like I'm back to where I was before.
That said it wasn't all bad. I started exercising regularly, and the last time I met with my friends that often was at high school, which I graduated from over 2 years ago. I got back into games after almost a year of not playing them (I was burned out and depression also played a part), including Smash, which resulted in me coming back here as well, and while I still have my reservations about making online friends I think it was for the best since this community has provided my with a lot of laughs and in a way filled that hole left by my previous online friend group. I was even featured in a comic!
This was a year of highs and lows. Probably more lows than highs, but enough highs to make it infinitely better than the last.
That being said, 2022 will be THE year for me. My contract for work expires on March 3rd, and I will not renew it. That will be when my life actually starts. I have some big aspirations for it, which I will detail right now as we are less than 12 hours away from the new year in my timezone:
- I'm gonna start being an actual adult this year. I'm gonna try my damnedest to move out of my house (I love my parents but goddamn I'm sick of living with them), find a better job that actually makes me feel like I accomplish something when when getting back home, and take a class so that I'll be qualified for a more stable job later down the line. I might also have to cut down on Smashboards time consequently, but you'll still see me.
- I want to end my addictions to both sugar and caffeine as I feel they both cultivate my depression and general lack of energy towards damn near everything. I'm gonna cut sugar almost completely for 42 days and then start eating sweets again but in moderation, but caffeine is going away forever. Also, the sugar thing relates to the first aspiration as well since sweets make up a good 80% of my expenses.
- I will start working on my story. I don't mean I'll immediately jump in and start writing it, no - I need to first figure out what I want my world to look like, do a lot of research to make it feel authentic, and then start developing my characters and build a roadmap of the story around them. Only then can I really start writing. It could take a while, potentially the whole year, but I'm fine with that.
- I plan to continue seeing my friends a lot. Some of my best memories of the year are with them and I definitely still want them in my life.
- I'll try to squeeze in gaming/watching/reading time wherever I can since my backlog is huge (I have a huge stack of comic books lying around and that's without mentioning all the manga I don't own but want to read, which includes One Piece), but it's lower priority than everything else.
- Also this one is more so wishful thinking than a full on aspiration, but I hope this will be the year where I finally get my dream tomboy gf