Okay, you know what? I'm going to pitch something actively ridiculous...
Super Smash Broadway: The Musical Crossover Platform Fighter.
Covering decades of musical theatre, this platform fighter brings together some of the biggest names in musicals and lets them punch each other in the face. And I'm going to make a roster for it - starting with 22 characters, just like Nick All-Star Brawl has.
Now, originally I thought I'd make this 100% original musical theatre characters only, then I remembered that... most famous musicals are adaptations of books, movies, etc. So, I will be including adaptations of history and public domain works, but I am (with exactly one exception) going to ignore licensed musicals. This isn't a slight towards licensed musicals - they are wonderful - but I'm attempting to make the roster small to begin and I think Disney alone would open an extensive pandora's box, nevermind all of the other characters like the Cat in the Hat, Willy Wonka, and SpongeBob, who have famous musicals in their own rights.
I am also going to be taking the Nick All-Stars Brawl approach to character choice - not every show is represented by the protagonist, if I feel like a side-character would lend themself to an unique moveset better. I also am imagining this hypothetical game would give a majority of the characters alts like the Villager has in Smash - so hair colour, eye colour, skin tone, etc. changes across the alts, as most musical characters don't have defined physical characteristics.
Finally, please note that my inclusion of a show is not an endorsement of the quality of the show. Some of the older shows especially haven't aged entirely well, but I still included characters from them in reference to their legacy in the history of the medium.
So, on that note, let's put together a roster!
- Annie (Annie Get Your Gun, 1946): The sharpshooter Annie functions as a zoner in this game, with strong range but poor options when firing in close quarters.
- Sky Masterson (Guys and Dolls, 1951): The gambler with a heart of gold has a trick moveset, pulling out a variety of props from his show - dice, picket signs, booze, and more.
- Eliza Doolittle (My Fair Lady, 1957): The flower seller who becomes a duchess uses a refined fighting style, smacking people around with her umbrella.
- Professor Harold Hill (The Music Man, 1958): The confidence man from out of town has a musical-themed moveset, pulling out the various instruments that he sold to the youths of River City to form a kit filled with a thematically-appropriate amount of mix-ups and tricky maneuvers.
- Bernardo (West Side Story, 1958): Getting the invite over the Romeo and Juliet of the show, the Tybalt of West Side Story Bernardo charges in as an aggressive close-range fighter.
- Conrad Birdie (Bye Bye Birdie, 1961): The rock n' roll legend who got drafted into the army shows his bad boy side in the world of Smash, throwing fists, downing bears, an generally not giving much of a crap about others.
- Don Quixote (Man of La Mancha, 1966): Charging into battle, the frequently-misguided Don Quixote is our anime swordsman equivalent.
- Pippin (Pippin, 1973): The lead of a show that basically has no forth wall adapts nicely to the world of Smash, performing the role of the game's shoto archetype.
- Dorothy Gale (The Wiz, 1975): The woman in the wonderful land of Oz fights with a click of her heals and the strength of her will. She's an agile fighter, but not always the best at actually knocking someone off the stage.
- Dr. Frank-N-Furter (The Rocky Horror Show, 1975): The alien from Transylvania fights with his signature suave and powers. His high-kicks have a tipper mechanic on the tips of his shoes!
- Sweeney Todd (Sweeney Todd: The Demon Barber of Fleet Street, 1979): The famous killer barber fights using his razor... this one is pretty self-explanatory.
- Magical Mr. Mistoffelees (Cats, 1983): Firing lasers and incorporating his famous fouetté turns, Mistoffelees is basically a ballet-dancing wizard who has strong range and agility, but most of his attacks don't do that much damage.
- Georges Seurat (Sunday in the Park with George, 1984): The famous artist is interrupted by a fight in the midst of painting his masterpiece and so he acts as the game's summoning character, painting various allies from Sunday in the Park to attack on his behalf, a la how Adeleine works in Kirby: Star Allies.
- Jean Valjean (Les Miserables, 1987): Valjean puts his battle skills to the test, fighting with a firearm and bayonet.
- Javert (Les Miserables, 1987): Following his rival into the world of Smash, Javert has a more calculated variation on Valjean's kit.
- The Phantom of the Opera (The Phantom of the Opera, 1988): The Phantom of the Opera has... the powers of the Phantom of the Opera. And, yes, if this hypothetical game had final smashes, he would drop a chandelier onto the stage.
- Elphaba (Wicked, 2004): Elphaba defies gravity and also my self-imposed restrictions on licensed musicals. She does magic.
- Usnavi de la Vega (In the Heights, 2008): Usnavi is another trick fighter, fighting using a variety of items stocked at his bodega.
- Alexander Hamiliton (Hamilton, 2016): Hamilton is this game's Mario, in that he has a well-rounded beginner-friendly kit because most of the audience will recognize who he is. The world does, indeed, know his name.
- Angelica Schuyler (Hamilton, 2016): The eldest Schuyler Sister puts her muscles to Work! with a moveset based on a lot of the most famous choreography done by the Schuylers in the show.
- Jared Kleinman (Dear Evan Hansen, 2017): As the Nigel Thornberry pick of this game, Jared gets in over his musical's protagonist just because I think it'd be funny to have a moveset made for him (and also because Evan would canonically run and hide from anything resembling the conflict of Smash).
- Emma Nolan and Alyssa Greene (The Prom, 2019): Finally, the women who just wanted to dance with each other get the chance to dance in the world of Smash. Acting as a duo character, the pair remain hand-in-hand dancing for all of their attacks, but have a stance mechanic where you can change who is leading the dance - Alyssa is more agile, while Emma has reduced knockback, in reference to her consistent strength and ability to stand firm throughout the show.
I think that covers a decent sloth of Broadway history while also representing a unique set of mechanics! Additionally, as a bonus easter egg to close this hypothetical out, the game's announcer would be the famous musical theatre fanboy from The Drowsy Chaperone, Man In Chair.
How's that for a concept for a game that has a literal 0% chance of ever happening?
