KneeOfJustice99

shoutout to the ds icon for mario hoops 3 on 3. because like holy **** mario is BALLING. #soretro

shoutout to dr. mario 64 for specifically taking 13 out of its 15 playable characters from wario land 3 of all things

i think there should be more straight up cryptids in the pokemon universe ngl. but then they're like actually treated that way. like i get that mewtwo might be like that in some ways but i genuinely want it to be the equivalent of some ten year old having caught an actual sasquatch and then after the fight the opponent is like "hold up was that ****ing bigfoot"

two completely random seperate things

1. it's so cool how the marvel vs. capcom games kinda just treat it like it's normal that the worlds of marvel and capcom kinda just exist as one now, even after the game's events. like how in mvc3, all of the endings are just like "yeah these worlds are one and the same now look at how they're interacting with other characters". it's a cool element ngl and i think it kinda gets lost when so many crossover narratives try to justify it with like world-ending cataclysms
2. kinda funny how mario kart's never really had jumping as a particularly prominent mechanic? like beyond just the feather item or whatever. because like you'd think the idea of being able to jump a little to get into different shortcuts would have been something that'd be more closely explored, rather than it being way more prevelant in something like crash team racing. interesting thought considering mario's like the platformer series but then i guess i also do like the fact that the mario spinoffs are able to be their own things <3

apparently there's a new elden ring or something? sounds neat.

i think one of the bosses should just straight up be an asset rip from armoured core 6 that somehow, through a ridiculous explanation like being a "species from another continent" or whatever, is vaguely canon. kind of like when in peace walker there were those missions where snake has to fight rathalos and also that weird monster hunter redesign of the metal gear rex but like straight up as a giant monster with the same build.

idk it'd be pretty funny to be like messing around in this fantasy world and then oops you have to fight a building sized mecha good luck gang

concept; setting in which vampires can only be killed by true symbols of faith, but are consistently hunted down by this one guy who is somehow capable of just shooting them with a normal gun, because his unwaivering faith in the fact that vampires aren't real essentially means that he, and only he, is capable of killing them like he would any non-vampiric person

Strange little ramble; I know people have been saying before now that Mario & Luigi: Partners in Time is kinda weird for specifically introducing the babies rather than like, using Wario and Waluigi, and honestly I can see both sides to that. But.

If there actually was a Wario & Waluigi game, I don't think they should have typical "elemental" properties like how Mario has fire or Luigi has electricity. Rather; Waluigi's theme should generally be coin-op stuff (pinball, crane-game, stuff like that) and Wario's money. So you can play around with the idea of Wario having to effectively pay Waluigi to be at his most useful, while also playing into the weirdness of the Mario Kart DS era where Waluigi... drove an excavator and owned a giant pinball table. And it also plays into Wario's greed. Which is fun.

Like, tell me a shell-bash but where Waluigi whips out two massive pinball paddles wouldn't be fun. And the idea of his actually useful equipment having such an obvious design flaw - that is, requiring money to work - just seems so fitting.

If nothing else, you have to commend Americans on their continued ingenuity in figuring out new ways to solve problems with old, seemingly unfitting tools. Us Brits have been clowning on y'all for years on how silly it is that guns are fine over there but healthcare isn't free, but somehow; y'all have found a way to make guns directly reduce insurance premiums and increase insurance coverage. I'm genuinely impressed.

people are always like "wow if i could stop time i could be so productive because i'd be able to procrastinate until i get bored of procrastinating and then actually do things". i think they underestimate the fact that, given literally infinite time to do literally anything but the things you're obligated to do, you would literally always find something to take your fancy. sure, it might seem to the outside world that you've immediately aged 40 years in a split-second, but that assignment is never going to get finished.

if a collection of people unanimously voted for me to be buried in a six mile deep hole that would subsequently be filled with concrete i would simply eat all of the concrete and then leave the hole. this does not seem like a difficult decision to me

random word of advice i think i probably needed like six years ago but might be useful to you; the fact that buildings usually have receptionists is proof that you, as an adult, should not be expected to know everything, not should you be expected to handle everything, nor should you be expected to be good at everything, because that's stupid and idiotic

consider; let's say you arrive at Big Corporation and you arrive at the front desk. you want to see Mr. Burns for your appointment to propose, idk, selling double-sided pencils, but you don't know where Mr. Burns is. so you ask the person at the front desk. and they'll be like "yeah go to the eleventysecondth floor and take four lefts and his office is right there".

because like. you shouldn't be expected to have an instinctual understanding of Big Corporation's building, right? you've just gotten there. and they pay a person to sit at the front door behind a desk so that people like you can ask them questions like "how do i find Mr. Burns i have an appointment to sell double-sided pencils".

the fact that people get paid for this is like. proof, i guess? that people shouldn't ever be expected to know everything. everyone has their own skills and specialisations, and if you don't know something, people who do know are generally glad to be of help. you wouldn't (usually) go to a butcher to buy a dress (unless you were lady gaga) because that's not what a butcher does. capiche?

it's okay not to know everything. you'll be fine. just listen and learn. <3

wild how dr. eggman can literally torture a hedgehog and jettison him into space, and yet somehow his method of acquiring emeralds is still more ethical than that of elon musk

man the cybermen already had such a brilliant "catchphrase" in "we will survive" who thought "delete" was any good. like yeah sure rise of the cybermen/the age of steel had cybus act as an allegory for big tech or whatever but the "removing emotions" thing was never the sole goal of them to the point that "delete" is a stupid catchphrase. they don't want to destroy; they want to preserve, just by cutting away whatever they need to. bruh

it's the first of december tomorrow



i'm still getting my head around it being september................

it will never not amaze me that, at around the same time give or take a year, disney simultaneously decided that their best method of ensuring continued profitability was that they had to remake all of their old films but worse, and they also bought the muppets

now, i'm not a huge fan of "remake culture" or anything but. come on. you had the capacity for "muppet aladdin" right there

why stop at fork? twentyeightk

that surgery that gives you elf ears is cool as **** they should do that for other stuff. wanna be a satyr? pop off. wanna have bigass horns? pop off queen. trans surgery that gives you antlers? we call it "gendeer affirming".

I don't know for certain if this is actually going to be useful to anyone here, but I feel I should spread it regardless. If you know anyone who has a manual wheelchair - the ones with the big wheel you can push, rather than the stick that drives it? - during winter, I'd absolutely recommend getting them like a little bag of zipties.

See, when it's icy out, it's commonplace for wheelchair-users to end up stuck indoors unless they go out of their way to buy specialised snow wheels for them, and they're like, a few hundred quid. No point doing it when you can think around it! If you tie some zipties around the wheel itself - like, around the spoke and the tire - you can effectively turn any wheel into a rudimentary snow wheel for about a fiver, tops. Try at least once every three spokes and you should be all good. (Also, if using the chair indoors and outdoors, it might be useful to get some socks over the ziptied wheels. They're also cheap, but they run less risk of tearing up carpet or lino or whatever.)

Spread this, if you can. We've just had an awful cold snap here in the UK and while I don't personally know anyone who uses a manual wheelchair it feels like the kind of information that should be more widely available.

i have a problem
someone dropped the ****ing ship of theseus on my yard and i'm trying to put it on ebay
do i list it as "new" or "used"

it's so funny to me that people are like "nooo we need immense gravitational force to create time dilation" when a lot of people have a time dilation device in their home already. it's called a washing machine. have you ever put a washing machine on a ten minute wash and come back twenty minutes later and it's still not done? yeah.

whether this implies that washing machines inherently cause time dilation in themselves due to possessing black holes within (to suck away all the dirt, of course) or that they induce time dilation through some yet-unseen method is up to you. i'm not a washingmachineologist. yet

me waking up in the middle of the night to discover that my bedroom has in fact been replaced with a 36,000 square foot factory floor (my house turned into a werehouse overnight)

Why did people wait this long to tell me that EA licensed a ton of their music to different TV broadcasters and producers in the 2000s, resulting in Command & Conquer music turning up in Top Gear

only one week left until we only have one moon again
i hope she doesn't get lonely up there

I'm told it's quite common for slasher villains to be real perfectionists. They're all about the execution, you see.

...I'll see myself out.

is it not insane to anyone else that like the single biggest video game ever is literally two entirely seperate games stapled together that don't even have functional parity and have a laundry list of asanine differences to the point where two people can own copies of the same game that aren't even remotely compatible but they are for all intents and purposes marketed as the exact same game albeit running on completely seperate codebases

that feels absolutely wild to me

if you were immediately teleported to like 2007 or something what would you do
i would post a reddit ama stating that i am from 2024 just for ****s and giggles just to see what people ask and how they respond lol hopefully it wouldn't mess with time too much

hospital fundraising idea (only works in america):

1. become an ambulance driver
2. drive into someone (important: make sure they're still alive)
3. take them to hospital for the injuries they now have
4. charge them thousands of dollars for the service
5. if they sue just guilt trip them by explaining how vital you are to the community
6. rinse and repeat as needed (or get more ambulances involved)

i might have singlehandedly found a way to subsidise the entire medicine industry

concept; demakes but for movies. oh wow you like the cgi or whatever in the new spider-man film? cool, we're making a demake that randomly reuses footage from different 70s-era spidey films while all being filmed with either period-accurate practical effects or hand-drawn stuff to the point where no way home looks like a tokusatsu. all of the same cast and locations and whatnot but we film on 35mm film reels and for some inexplicable reason all of the technology like phones is period-accurate to the mid-70s while the cars in the street are still modern.

this will unironically be disney's big new strat in the 2030s

kinda wild to think that with the whole mogai movement back on tumblr, and a lot of the blogs for it being closed, abandoned, or nuked from the platform entirely, there is a genuinely likely possibility that there are "lost media genders"

it's honestly still kinda wild to me that when m2 was making the reprint archives on the 3ds they looked at power drift and thought "wow the bonus stages where you can race an f-14 tomcat are fun, let's essentially completely retool the game into sega all stars before sega all stars" and then just replaced all of the characters and music tracks with other sega stuff because why not. on top of already making the game more suitable for the stereoscopic 3d display the 3ds used. wild.

i also can't get over how funny of a pick a dralinflore was

number of multiversus characters who have officially endorsed a presidential candidate in the 2024 presidential election; one (and counting)

one thing i think would be really cool would be some kinda crossover game with a single video game company but all the characters are in designs inspired by lil rubber keshi gomu gures in appearance and mostly inspired by their older art overall.

idk. a part of me would love to go for that sort of "toyetic" style in a handheld smash title compared to the larger scale "big event" on a home console (which i still think was a hella missed opportunity for sm4sh honestly!!) but also you could totally do cool things with it just as some kind of gashapon rpg, a silly character-based puzzle game akin to something like heroes of sokoban, or even just an extended shenmue gashapon thing where you can look at the lil goobers by awkwardly moving your hand around in a 3d space. and like sure the new 2d zelda titles have a doll-like look but you could probably totally do something silly and fun with this kinda thing. i'm not even sure what

yes this may have been inspired by my recent discovery of literally hundreds of keshi figures that were 3d scanned and uploaded to archive.org recently but look at the funny doll man he's so precious

halloweezer

can't wait for the inevitable 2024 exodus of literally every long-form video essayist from youtube because nintendo music app means nintendo have a justification to go absolutely nuclear on copyright enforcement of their music resulting in able sisters singlehandedly obliterating an entire genre of content on the platform

fun fact; in wii play's tanks (or "wii tanks"), the layouts for each arena actually change based on whether your wii is set to 4:3 or 16:9. this is your reminder that wii tanks is peak game design

the british government has approached the good people of the united kingdom for suggestions on how to go about saving our nhs and amongst a vast number of suggestions including "build hs2 so we can get to hospitals quicker", "run a wetherspoons in every hospital" and "replace ambulance sirens with healthy eating advice" we also have this gem



unfortunately, the health secretary (the right honourable member for ilford north) has personally denied that he'll be doing this to save our nhs and considers the suggestion "silly". i think this is a clear sign he is against sick people

Random 2am musing; ask your teachers to get lava lamps.

Might sound like a really random tidbit, but lava lamps are actually great as a form of visual stimulation for neurodiverse people, especially when talking about education. I guess it's no secret that a ton of people here are autistic; but insisting on maintaining flawless eye contact during a lesson over the course of literal hours sounds like it'd be hell for anyone.

Inb4 "but then people won't focus on the teacher!!", people would just find themselves staring at something else (like the ceiling or a computer screen across the room) anyway, so actually just getting a lava lamp for that specific reason helps students appear more focused to external observers or whatever. Plus, again, there's a difference between "listening to someone" and "looking like you're listening to someone". (A difference that seems to be lost on people for some reason.)

Plus, lava lamps are pretty cool for setting a less clinical mood. Let's be real, if you had a teacher that would go and set up a lava lamp in every classroom they teach in, they'd be the Cool Teacher™, right?

life update: my younger siblings have entirely managed to cover the back of my bedroom door in obscene quantities of hand soap. this means war.

i know social media is slowly in the process of swirling around the proverbial drain but like it's genuinely mindmelting to get sent something from one of those slop accounts from a friend and it's going on about how they just came across this guy pouring milk on himself in the subway that they just recorded today and it's footage from the ****ing eric andre show from like eight years ago