The Unhappy Thread

[Luigitoilet]

I have come to the realization that I'll never be able to provide a woman with as much sexual stimuli as another woman with a strapon can.

i printscreened this post for posterity

 

[PsychoIncarnate]

I'm sure if your good enough with your fingers and tongue you can make up for your ...physical limitations

 

[Lore]

Ok, no no no no no. Do not continue this in any way or else infractions will be handed out.

 

[Vixen]

I'm upset that I HAVE to board the planes to/from Apex as a male.

;-;

 

[Chronodiver Lokii]

LOOOOOOOL
What is even going on here

Awwww Mizuki That sucks D:
Well, just rock Apex all super fancy and stuff then!

 

[PsychoIncarnate]

I have to do an essay thing called "This I believe" but I really can't think of anything that really justifies my beliefs. I more or less believe what I believe because I feel it's right, but my beliefs have never ended in some kind of triumphant story or anything. All the examples I can think of using my beliefs end up with me failing/ mocked/ being used/ etc. Which is why I question my beliefs, and sometimes wish I was actually someone else, but never really change because I still believe it's right after thinking about it.

In other words, I really have no idea what to write about when I don't have any major accomplishments in life, and in some aspects am behind a lot of people my age

 

[Holder of the Heel]

It's a paper on just something you believe? Surely there is something you believe in that you know it true and wasn't necessarily from bad observations and/or experiences? To say that is to literally say everything that has happened to you has been bad.

 

[quote]

So yesterday I went to look for a new manga to read and looked through some stuff on manga updates. I found one and typed it into google. As usual I just go for the first thing that turns up. So I'm sitting here reading it and the story doesn't seem to line up. It turns out google gave me a different manga without an "s" on the last word.

The bad part in all of this is that what I was reading turned out to be a yaoi manga, and I didn't figure it out until they got into the part where there were naked men.

 

[Froggy]

I had a bad day today. I wanted to watch X-factor before I went to bed tonight(I find it comforting), but no one posted online. I'm going to wake up tomorrow grumpy because of this.

 

[The Fail Tracer]

EDIT: Ninja'd by Froggy.

@quote: Read it through a bunch of times, it might grow on ya.

...Nah, sorry, I'm just being silly. Actually I don't know what to say, though I usually try to at least think of something to say to people who are in a bind before I post my own problems.

Well, anyway. I'll get straight to it: We think our cat has worms, and now I'm kind of afraid to go outside. If I do happen to go outside, though, I have to be EXTREMELY cautious of where I step. I literally saw a little clump of those horrible monsters outside my home. I actually ran screaming. I can't think of the last time I legitimately screamed like a little girl.

And I'm sorry if I've made anyone feel like throwing up. They make ME feel the same way, although probably even worse. I was scarred by them in fourth grade when I saw them from our puppies. I truly do believe that they are the most disgusting and abominable creatures to ever exist in the universe.

Sorry if this seems ridiculous, but it was just something that makes me unhappy. I know the problem is easily solvable by getting the cat treated, so if you want, just forget this post.

 

[Froggy]

I really hate it when my frustrations at home keep me distracted when I'm at work. It seems to happen a lot. I have a hardtime remaining in work mode, when I have pressing problems in my life.

 

[Jon Farron]

Sounds like you need a vacation to get away from everything and just enjoy yourself for a while. :l

 

[Luigitoilet]

just kinda randomly sad today since I woke up.

there is this girl who I keep letting stay at my house. we used to sleep together but it's been months since she was willing so for a while it's just been...well, sleeping together xD. I've come to find that I don't really like this person very much, but I've gotten so used to laying with someone at night. so I keep letting this girl come over just because it's better than sleeping alone. but what I really want is to either start having sex again or to find a girl I actually like seriously and who actually likes me seriously. I don't really understand why she even wants to come over, as I'm often at work and when I get home she is sleeping already. so it's not even like hanging out, really, she's pretty much just skipping school to sleep in my bed. it's just weird. weird relationship.

 

[Zook]

Clap Your Hands Say Yeah is doing a show tomorrow in Boston, but I have to work.

 

[Froggy]

lmao, so if anyone follows my posts here then you know I have some pretty bad issues. I'm at work today and I've been whispering to myself because it helps me cope(I'm not crazy or anything, but therapy would be very beneficial to me), anyways one of my coworkers G-chatted me letting me know that everyone can hear what I'm saying clearly. That's hilarious. I really don't care what they think of me, but it's entirely plausible I could lose my job over this so I need to be more careful. I really was whispering though, I overestimated how quiet it is.

 

[quote]

I'm really bad at understanding body language, and I need help figuring out what something I did meant.

Me and 2-3 other people were hanging out, somebody pulled up a video on her phone and I'm trying to watch it. It didn't load, but I'm close enough to her that I'm definitely in her personal space. At this point in time, she doesn't seem to mind. I realize this some 10-20 seconds after the fact and scoot away then to give her that space back. Afterwards she gives me a funny look.

I know that I did something abnormal because of the funny look she gave me, but I can't figure out what's going through her mind, or what my actions got mistaken for. Any ideas?

 

[Luigitoilet]

If you are constantly that self conscious then you probably appear visibly nervous with such movements. She probably just thinks you are awkward. I really wouldn't overanalyze something like this.

 

[Holder of the Heel]

Don't worry about being in her personal space unless she tells you it bothers her, if she doesn't speak up, that's her fault. At least you could have even asked if being that close bothered her, drawing away from her like that leaves the interpretation to her imagination. The same way your interpretation of what her face was about is now up to your imagination, causing you to overthink it, just as she probably did by reacting funny.

 

[Master Xanthan]

lmao, so if anyone follows my posts here then you know I have some pretty bad issues. I'm at work today and I've been whispering to myself because it helps me cope(I'm not crazy or anything, but therapy would be very beneficial to me), anyways one of my coworkers G-chatted me letting me know that everyone can hear what I'm saying clearly. That's hilarious. I really don't care what they think of me, but it's entirely plausible I could lose my job over this so I need to be more careful. I really was whispering though, I overestimated how quiet it is.

I don't see how you could lose your job because you're whispering to yourself. If you are doing your work well and everything, I doubt they would fire you over something as silly as that. Though the fact that they are hearing you whispering could be kinda embarrassing.

 

[Chronodiver Lokii]

College, yo. A few quarters ago, I was super upset and unhappy all the time. Now, I have no time to be upset or unhappy because of all the work I have to do. You think that'd be a good thing, but I am stressed out of my mind.
And it's all my fault.

Not because I am waiting until the last minute: I'm actually doing assignments as soon as I can and pace myself. But, I decided to take 5 difficult classes and I just have so many assignments....which are mostly large projects....that I have to get done in a short period of time. I have no time to do anything at the moment. And I mean, this weekend is going to be a nice break since friends are visiting, its zombiefest weekend, and league finals are being streamed at a bar downtown.....
But my one friend will be helping me do a bunch of my assignments since he graduated in the same major as me.

Guhhh....

To give you guys a taste of my workload....
Class list: Material and Lighting (aka textures, lighting, and camera usage in a digital 3D space), Game Design and Gameplay (aka make a game concept from scratch class), Background Design/Layout (group project class where you have to work on animatics and such), Digital Sculpture and Texturing (working with ZBrush), and 3D Animation (aka MODEL, UNWRAP, TEXTURE, AND ANIMATE ALL OF THE THINGS). PLUS, im a consultant on an upper quarter class for the concept art team.

My focus is in concept art, so I'm artistic team lead for design/layout (since we are using my game design and gameplay concept)....but most of my classes are modeling heavy. I'm going to definitely improve this quarter...but it's tough and I'm stressed out....

 

[Holder of the Heel]

But, I decided to take 5 difficult classes

And that's where you went wrong. XD Assuming of course you weren't forced into taking on so much. This is my first semester of taking a good amount of classes (four), but I made sure that I had a really easy one, one that I loved doing so much that it wasn't any issue, one that was mildly tough but somewhat interesting, and then throw one difficult "I don't care about this ****" class. So far that has worked out decently well, though then again, I have a lot of time to go at my own pace with it all.

But sorry that you are so stressed out. It's alright though, you are doing so many challenging interesting things and have a lot of friends that care about you and an exciting weekend coming up. :D


Edit: On an "unhappy" note, I have an essay do this Sunday that I haven't even begun to think of how I should do it. Getting a zero would be a pretty huge blow to my grade. >_<

 

[Vkrm]

lmao, so if anyone follows my posts here then you know I have some pretty bad issues. I'm at work today and I've been whispering to myself because it helps me cope(I'm not crazy or anything, but therapy would be very beneficial to me), anyways one of my coworkers G-chatted me letting me know that everyone can hear what I'm saying clearly. That's hilarious. I really don't care what they think of me, but it's entirely plausible I could lose my job over this so I need to be more careful. I really was whispering though, I overestimated how quiet it is.

Were you spouting off about the pro's and con's of devil worship or confessing your love for underage girls? You would have to say some really obscene and offensive **** for them to fire you. They'll probably let you off with a warning.

 

[Froggy]

I don't see how you could lose your job because you're whispering to yourself. If you are doing your work well and everything, I doubt they would fire you over something as silly as that. Though the fact that they are hearing you whispering could be kinda embarrassing.

I know. It's a large leap to go from everyone hearing me talk to myself to getting fired, but whenever I make a mistake I tend to fixate on the worst possible outcome. I've become a terrible pessimist. I find it helpful in that I always prepare myself for the worst, but at the sametime constantly living with so much anxiety really takes it's toll on you.

 

[Holder of the Heel]

Expecting the worst is a terrible way to live, that is basically the belief of Schopenhauer who thought that life was essentially evil and full of suffering, so he thought, "Hey, if we expect it, it won't be so bad! " It's better to not prepare for ANY outcome, and by that I mean don't assume anything. It's really hard not to, but your emotions spring from your expectations. If they are negative, you are going to be negative. Plain and simple. At the very least you can assume things are going to be good but at the same time be able to take it or leave it if it doesn't work out that way. It's a matter of acceptance.

 

[KRDsonic]

I'd assume that theory varies from person to person though. One thing with me is that I expect the worst but hope for the best. And yes, expecting the worst makes it easier to deal with things when they happen (And believe me, I've had the worst outcome possible come true many times in my life) however, that doesn't make me a negative person. I still go on with my life, remain up-beat most of the time, get things done, etc and am still a very happy person.

 

[Froggy]

Expecting the worst is a terrible way to live, that is basically the belief of Schopenhauer who thought that life was essentially evil and full of suffering, so he thought, "Hey, if we expect it, it won't be so bad! " It's better to not prepare for ANY outcome, and by that I mean don't assume anything. It's really hard not to, but your emotions spring from your expectations. If they are negative, you are going to be negative. Plain and simple. At the very least you can assume things are going to be good but at the same time be able to take it or leave it if it doesn't work out that way. It's a matter of acceptance.

I agree it's not the best way to live, but it's completely unintentional. It's not some kind of defense mechanism I've created. It's just my personality to dwell on things and fixate on my problems.

It's funny because earlier this year I was the most optimistic and faithful I've ever been in my whole life. And then through a series of bad events, I lost all that and back to my fearful pessimistic self. Hopefully, something about this will change in time again.

 

[Holder of the Heel]

@Sonic, What you speak of is more like preparing for the worst instead of expecting negativity from life.

Froggy, I'm not accusing you of intentionally doing it. You understand that you do it regardless, which is what matters. Once you find the cause of suffering, you can reason out of it quite easily when you ask yourself "Why?" you feel that way enough, because you'll catch yourself absurdly feeling someway and you reason yourself out of it because it becomes so bizarre and silly. That's how I'm largely a content person, only when I am irrational does suffering grab a hold of me, but otherwise, I can call it for what it is: bull****.

 

[Luigitoilet]

I've found that my "ideal" state of living is to strive for stoicism as much as humanly possible. I do this kind of naturally, and sometimes it gets to the point where I feel like I don't have feelings the majority of the time. So, I pretty much don't get excited for things if I can possibly help it. It goes the other way and I don't dread things too much either. I pretty much have started to just ignore everything that isn't related to right now.

 

[Holder of the Heel]

Stoicism is great, but it doesn't really abdicate that you not get excited about things. I believe, personally, you can put things under a positive light without putting yourself at risk from such expectations. It's difficult to manage that, typically when you step into the world of highs, you're stepping into the world of lows (or potential ones) at the same time. If we can learn to be content and appreciate all things, and snuff out pessimism, we can get highs without the lows (as much as we can, at least). The first stoics were a prime example of this, they were very active in the politics of their time in order to make things better, dealing with all the crap that comes with it.

Again, I can't stress how tough it is, I can't help but live in an epicurean way, and that makes me think I'm stoic when I'm really just putting myself in a state of being where diversity and troubles aren't there to begin with for me to tolerate, so I sit here thinking, "Wow I am so stoic nothing can penetrate my peace of mind and joy!"

 

[Claire Diviner]

I've found that my "ideal" state of living is to strive for stoicism as much as humanly possible. I do this kind of naturally, and sometimes it gets to the point where I feel like I don't have feelings the majority of the time. So, I pretty much don't get excited for things if I can possibly help it. It goes the other way and I don't dread things too much either. I pretty much have started to just ignore everything that isn't related to right now.

Living as a stoic has the advantage where through disappointments, you feel unaffected, but at the same time, you don't want to come across as completely devoid of emotion; it can be poisonous to relationships with friends, family, and significant others, though that goes without saying, I'm sure. I have a similar issue, but not in the sense where I'm stoic more than I have a hard time expressing certain feelings, especially happiness and excitement.

 

[Keblerelf]

I feel like the worst human being in the world right now.

My family planned to go to China during my winter break to visit my grandmother. It might be the last time I get to see her alive since she’s been in really poor health. My mom sent me an email saying that the earliest we could go would be New Years Day and that we would get back on the 12th.

The thing is, Apex is from 11-13th.

I shouldn’t even be thinking about playing video games when my grandmother is dying right now, but the first thought when I opened up my mom’s email was “****, how can I get back earlier”. It’s so pathetic to try and put that over a family member.

I’m trying to look at the situation through my grandma’s perspective. If I were an old woman who was half blind, could barely walk, can’t hear well, and suffered minor episodes of amnesia, I’d love to see my grandkids for one last time. I would want everyone close to me to be there before I pass on. I’d be completely selfish. I’d want to see and talk to everyone who has made an impact in my life before I don’t have the chance anymore.

I’m so scared of seeing her in her condition. I remember one time we had a long drive back home from vacation and she suffered a mini stroke. She couldn’t move her lower body at all. We had to carry her in the house. After we put her in her room, I couldn’t stop thinking about how she might die. I wouldn’t be able to be in the same room as her if I saw her wheezing and struggling to move. The instant I see her I’d tear up and leave.

I want her to live forever. I know that’s impossible, but I’ve wished that since I was in middle school. I don’t want to see her dead because I know how hard I’ll take it. I’ve never had anyone close to me die before and I don’t want to know how deeply hurt I can feel. I’ve daydreamed about my mom calling me and telling me the bad news. It’s my way of mentally preparing. Even when it’s not real, I get lost in my thoughts. My face just loses all emotion and I’m just thinking about how I would feel if it actually happened. I don’t even talk to her right now, but I still know she’s alive, and that subconsciously gives me comfort. I don’t want her to pass away when we visit her. I want her to leave this world without me seeing her dead body on a bed. I wish the same thing for everyone in my family. I want my dad, mom, and brother to all be immortal so I don’t have to see them die. I’d rather die first before seeing them dead. No, I shouldn’t say that because then they’ll be really sad too. I just want to go through life without having to feel the pain of death. It’s something that I can’t fully grasp.

The more I write, the less I think about that smash tournament. It makes me feel better about myself knowing that I actually do care about her.

 

[KRDsonic]

As someone who watched my mom as she was dying, I can say that having thoughts about say... wanting to go to a tournament instead of seeing your grandma is normal. After my mom was first diagnosed with cancer, her first chemo appointment happened to be on the week Apex was going to be. I had made plans and had everything I needed for my trip to there and back paid for, had housing and everything, etc. but it wasn't until the day before that I was supposed to leave to catch my flight that I decided against going and to stay with my mom for when she went to her first chemo appointment instead, and I had, and still have no regrets about that decision.

And then at the same time, the weekend that WHOBO 4 happened (which I really wanted to go to because it was the last WHOBO, and I lived in the same city that it was hosted) ended up being the weekend that my mom passed away. I can definitely say that, while going to a tournament may be fun and memorable, getting to see your family for potentially the last time and knowing that you were there for them will last a lot longer than your experiences at a tournament. Of course, I don't know how close you are to your grandma, but this is just my ideas and opinions.

 

[Holder of the Heel]

Today my essay is due, and I haven't started it, and have absolutely no motivation to do so. Damn. -.-

 

[Jon Farron]

I know the feeling. :l

 

[quote]

I was there when my grandpa died.
That was the hardest thing I ever had to do in my life.

Just go. I don't even want to think about what the guilt trips would feel like if I wasn't there.

 

[sakuraZaKi]

I keep losing in Starcraft.

 

[PsychoIncarnate]

I don't think I have any way of talking to girls I think are attractive

It's like we don't even speak the same language

 

[Luigitoilet]

I don't think I have any way of talking to girls I think are attractive

It's like we don't even speak the same language

Something that helped me a ton (though I still have a lot of trouble with many girls) is working in a bar/restaurant. I'm a barback and working with super hot busty bartender girls has really helped me ease into being charming and flirty while being myself. And I'm really really weird. And nobody is creeped out or anything and the hottest girl there is super receptive to my flirting attempts and is unusually physical with me (little things like grabbing my arm or slapping my *** or not yelling at me if i slap hers). This is just pure flirting. She's in a serious relationship and is otherwise just not the type of person I would date. But it's really helped me with self-confidence and talking to pretty girls in general. Like I said though, it's still pretty difficult. I have an entire lifetime of social and personal inadequacy to overcome xD

Working at a restaurant bar can be pretty wonderful for social "improvement" in general, in my experience. That goes more for front-of-house work as opposed to cooking.

 

[PsychoIncarnate]

I have a little more to deal with than JUST not having social skills

 

[Luigitoilet]

well, ok. so you're not looking for advice and just venting then.