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Misinterpret the Sakurai Quote!

CheeseAnton

Smash Journeyman
Joined
Oct 1, 2020
Messages
340
Location
Savannah, GA
ThE cReAtOr Of KiRbY dOeSn'T lIkE hIs ChArAcTeRs In SmAsH!?!? Watch out Kirby mains, your main might be taken out of the game next patch.


"I'm Garfield, and I hate Mondays"
 

LAA9000

Smash Journeyman
Joined
Feb 20, 2020
Messages
225
Location
Hype Train to Splatsville
Slippi.gg
JUST#956
3DS FC
0361-9069-2936
Switch FC
SW-5393-4946-0209
It is revealed that Masahiro Sakurai and Jim Davis are two halves of a god. By fusing together, they gain the power to remove Monday from the flow of time - Sunday now goes straight to Tuesday.

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Yiptap

Smash Ace
Joined
Feb 13, 2021
Messages
575
Sakurai said the word heck, that means that the next fighter has been or is associated with heck (also known as hell), meaning that the next character is Doomguy!

"I've fallen, and I am struggling to get up."
 

FirestormNeos

Smash Lord
Joined
Apr 4, 2013
Messages
1,626
Location
Location Machine Broke
NNID
FirestormNeos
Super Smash Bros and LifeAlert will now be doing a promotion together. Every copy of Melee now comes with a free LifeAlert and viceversa.

"so i've been talking with videogamedunkey, recently, and that's got me thinking about some philosophical stuff. anyways, Melee 2 is cancelled, y'all"
 

Doc Monocle

Smash Ace
Joined
Dec 24, 2020
Messages
805
Location
Perched on a tree branch.
Sakurai is turning over a new leaf. He has decided to stop making Smash Bros. games so he can meditate on the deeper issues of life, such as the nature of reality... That and he is sick of the frequent complaints from fans, hence the frank announcement.

"Oh, no! I just bought a bread machine, and I lost it!"
 

Kikio4546

Smash Cadet
Joined
Feb 24, 2020
Messages
36
Pack your bags, everyone; Smash's over since Sakurai is gonna die from starvation without his bread machine

"Hi my name is Ebony Dark'ness Dementia Raven Way and I have long ebony black hair (that's how I got myname) with purple streaks and red tips that reaches my mid-back and icy blue eyes like limpid tears and a lot of people tell me I look like Amy Lee (AN: if u don't know who she is get da hell out of here!). I'm not related to Gerard Way but I wish I was because he's a major ****ing hottie. I'm a vampire but my teeth are straight and white. I have pale white skin. I'm also a witch, and I go to a magic school called Hogwarts in England where I'm in the seventh year (I'm seventeen). I'm a goth (in case you couldn't tell) and I wear mostly black. I love Hot Topicand I buy all my clothes from there. For example today I was wearing a black corset with matching lace around it and a black leather miniskirt, pink fishnets and black combat boots. I was wearing black lipstick, white foundation, black eyeliner and red eye shadow. I was walking outside Hogwarts. It was snowing and raining so there was no sun, which I was very happy about. A lot of preps stared at me. I put up my middle finger at them."

(I feel like I've done this before in this thread...)
 
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Doc Monocle

Smash Ace
Joined
Dec 24, 2020
Messages
805
Location
Perched on a tree branch.
... Now I know that Smash Bros. is finished. Sakurai is having an identity crisis, wrapped in gloom, seasoned with morbidity, and served with a side of curious context chaos ... Poor Sakurai!

' Hi. Good morning. '
 

Kikio4546

Smash Cadet
Joined
Feb 24, 2020
Messages
36
Just like any other tweet Sakurai has made, this tweet is going to have a cancerous comment section...

" "
 
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KneeOfJustice99

Smash Ace
Joined
Oct 29, 2018
Messages
783
Location
The Velvet Room
Minecraft Steve will be overpowered in the next game as a nominal tribute.

"I'm going to study dentistry in the near future."
Fellas... Super Trauma Centre Bros. confirmed as a Switch OLED exclusive release. I can't wait to play as Jotaro.

"Personally, I prefer dark cherry jam to strawberry jam, but they pale in comparison to lemon curd."
 

Doc Monocle

Smash Ace
Joined
Dec 24, 2020
Messages
805
Location
Perched on a tree branch.
Sakurai wanted Gru from the Despicable Me movies in Smash Bros., but Nintendo found themselves using the legal budget to buy an equal value of lemon curd for consumption by executives.

"Don't listen to anything I'm saying. Everyone keeps twisting around what I say!"
 

KneeOfJustice99

Smash Ace
Joined
Oct 29, 2018
Messages
783
Location
The Velvet Room
Brain Age boss fight with educational elements featuring Dr. Kawashima confirmed.

"Kris get the banana." Potassium."
Every single character in the history of the Donkey Kong series has just been confirmed for the next Smash game, though sadly, every character who is not a part of the Donkey Kong series has been removed. Also, the Queen is DLC, and the game is changed completely to a bumper car simulator.

"I must stress, 4th party picks will never get into Super Smash Brothers. I apologise if that disappoints anyone, however."
 

Linkmain-maybe

Smash Journeyman
Joined
May 14, 2021
Messages
222
Location
Erdrea
He means that he will boil apart their gameplay elements. Using those gameplay elements, he will make 14 new FE characters based off of those designs

“Please stop harassing me for Waluigi, I swear I’m at my limit.”
 

Doc Monocle

Smash Ace
Joined
Dec 24, 2020
Messages
805
Location
Perched on a tree branch.
Sakurai is at his limit... For resistance to caving in to the pressure, and presses for Waluigi's inclusion.

"The statement I'm making is a lie. I beg everyone. Don't think about it at all! It's cheap, it doesn't mean anything, and I'm going to hide in the closet while everybody discusses this!"
 
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Linkmain-maybe

Smash Journeyman
Joined
May 14, 2021
Messages
222
Location
Erdrea
Sakurai is at his limit... For resistance to caving in to the pressure, and presses for Waluigi's inclusion.

"The statement I'm making is a lie. I beg everyone. Don't think about it at all! It's cheap, it doesn't mean anything, and I'm going to hide in the closet while everybody discusses this!"
Sakurai has low self esteem, and wishes not to be seen.


“I won’t make smash 6.”
 
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Doc Monocle

Smash Ace
Joined
Dec 24, 2020
Messages
805
Location
Perched on a tree branch.
The next Smash Bros. game will take as a minor objective the demotion of Mario.

"I was about to go sailing this weekend, but I remembered my seasickness, and settled for racing remote-controlled boats in my backyard pond instead."
 

KneeOfJustice99

Smash Ace
Joined
Oct 29, 2018
Messages
783
Location
The Velvet Room
Sakurai sailed and he had seasickness and instead he put boats in his Backyard.

"I am not Joking Now about Inclusion of Fighters"
This is a thinly veiled joke, which proves that he'll be adding Goomba, Koopa, Parakoopa, Shy Guy, NES Toad (specifically from SMB1, not SMB2, meaning that it has absolutely no moveset and simply wails incoherently that the Princess is in another castle) a sentient ? Block and the oil barrel from the bottom of Donkey Kong's 25m level that occasionally spews a fireball or two, to the next Smash game.

"It was very difficult to make Ultimate a reality, mostly due to licensing. As a result, I can imagine a lot of third party characters might not make it into the next title... for which I apologise."
 

Linkmain-maybe

Smash Journeyman
Joined
May 14, 2021
Messages
222
Location
Erdrea
The next smash game will only have Final fantasy characters


“You clowns call me incompetent on twitter yet always beg me for your most wanted. I’m done, your characters will never be in Ultimate
!”
 
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