worst excuse you heard someone say cause they lost

[gghhh3]

"My C-stick is broken"
"You grab to much"
"You run to fast"
"All you do is knee, knee, knee, knee, do something else"(Yet all he did was Fsmash, he was flaco)
"Captain Falcon is OP"

Many more, but I forget. He stops and just quits after like 3 games now. He used to rage then quit, now he just quits. I wish there were smashers where I live.

 

[ru5514n]

"Lasers are so cheap!!"

- Random scrub who apparently never seen a Falco SHL before

 

[EPsilon933]

"All you did was spam dtilt. That's ****ing cheap." He never tried to even jump over me as I was slowly pushing him off the stage.

 

[xbombr]

"Chaingrabbing is so noob" *Continuous pausing and unpausing trying to mess me up.*

After match is over: "You're a freaking noob for throwing me over and over again."
Me: "Then don't sit in your shield for 2 minutes of a match on FD as Fox when you're playing aganist a Marth, because it looks like I just won by spamming 3-4% damage grabs and up tilt. You're the noob for falling for it and not even trying to get out of it by doing anything besides pausing."

 

[Proverbs]

95% of johns just equate to "I would have won if I hadn't lost." So that's how I john whenever I lose. I just say "Man, I was trying to win. I mean, if I won I wouldn't have lost."

 

[Glitchy]

Great excuses like:
"You are such a coward you're not letting me hit you"
"You're just attacking all the time"

Well... It's a fighting game >_<

EDIT: "You know how to wavedash."
"I can't L-Cancel

 

[xXx-NoobKing-xXx]

95% of johns just equate to "I would have won if I hadn't lost." So that's how I john whenever I lose. I just say "Man, I was trying to win. I mean, if I won I wouldn't have lost."

That is the best avatar I have ever seen in my entire life.


Also, one of the lamer excuses I've heard from someone I've beaten. "You're noobking"

 

[ChivalRuse]

Worst john ever ...

"You only win because you use the bubble."

>_>

 

[WaveLength]

"You only win because you use the bubble."

"You use the same move all the time."

Apparently, I can't approach with N-Air.

 

[TresChikon]

"Your controller is black, that's why you can fight better."

 

[edgeluca]

'You're always sliding around, I can't catch you'

It's called a wavedash =D

 

[AprilShaw]

Not sure which thread but, DJ Nintendo said something about eating before a tourney made him, Jman, and Lambchops do worse XD

 

[Lovage]

LOL dj says a lot of stuff when he loses

 

[DtJ Jungle]

no dude

food comatose

the itis

legit johns yo.

 

[DerkTheJerk]

"my controller has lag in it"
i was like wtf thats a brand new controller.

 

[Zestablar]

"You pushed me!"

I was 5 feet away.

 

[HiIH]

"You're so ****ing lucky, you never mean to do anything you do, I hate you."

 

[null55]

"It's not that hard to win with Falco."

RE: "yeah, when i'm better than you ."

 

[Tee ay eye]

why is the word "john" not in the title

 

[iamthemicrowave]

stop wavecheating

 

[Oracle]

THIS GAME IT DOESN'T DO WHAT I TELL IT TO
My friends are funny

 

[INSANE CARZY GUY]

I once when to pee and my brother unpaused it and took like 2 stocks I think he was falcon and I was pichu. THat's just plain low.

 

[Dezerax]

"Marth is being a rebel/gay!"

lol

 

[Rayku]

School wide tournament this past week:

Other Guy: Yo man this game sucks 'cause it's all about predicting

He was referring to Brawl.

 

[SKpro]

"i need to warm up"

 

[onedayafter7]

"Im used to playing people with less tech skill. Just because you know how to wavedash consistently doesn't make you better."

Ive learned not to play this kid anymore

 

[ru5514n]

"I'm not used to the alternate music on this stage."

WTF kind of a john is that?

 

[shounenkel]

i couldnt see lol, or i didnt feel like DI-ing that, thats why you do that combo an win the match, OMFG this guy is full of johns!

 

[victra♥]

"my head was in a toilet for 2 hours last night"

 

[HT F8]

"my head was in a toilet for 2 hours last night"

You beat me to it.

 

[bolt.]

"I'm off the stage and you come out and hit, this is bull****" Throws controller.
That was when I first first started trying to get kids from my school involved in melee. Lolol.

 

[SKpro]

i didnt feel like DI-ing that, thats why you do that combo and win the match

I used to hear this a lot back in the day.

 

[UberMario]

"I have to eat and will be back in 3 hours"

 

[KnightMare516]

im getting cramps since i used my hand too much last night.

 

[Byron 1337]

"I had a hangover"

 

[x0Myke0x]

my lil brother said he had dust in his eye for 47 matches straight...
and then my friend said that it was because i was link and he was ganondorf that his fate was already decided from Ocarina of Time....lmao

 

[Alphabravo]

"the elevation on the left side of the stage caused my tipper to miss"

"i'm not used to the lighting in this room"
Myself and a few others were playing smash in a kitchen.

"this tv's brightness is messed up...marth's skin shouldn't be that dark"

"music hacks....you altered the game so you could win"
Heard this one at a tournament.

 

[Nø Ca$h]

my hands are to cold to move fast

"I Hate fvcking Black ppl!"
"im not black..."
"but u actin like a *****!"

 

[edgeluca]

im getting cramps since i used my hand too much last night.

rofl i wonder what they used their hands for.

 

[Pi]

sorry it's universally accepted that cold hand johns are legit.