What would Snake do?(WWSD)

[Dragonbreath]

Snake: Otacon! I've found something weird!

O: That thing is a Hedgehog, Snake.

S: A Hedgehog?

O: Yes. A small, brush-dwelling insectivore found in temperate, tropical and sub-desert climate with. . .

S: Hold on a sec. That thing's a hedgehog?

O: Yes, he is.

S: It's four feet tall, bright blue and it called me a *BLEEEP*!!

O: He calls everyone that.

S: You know it?!

O: Everyone knows Sonic.

S: Huh. . .So it's got a name. . .Is it some kind of humanoid hybrid genome project?

O: No Snake. It's a hedgehog.

S: . . .

O: Oh, and he can move at the speed of sound, so. . .

S: I'm never gonna get used to this Smash stuff. . .

 

[CrenTIScO]

lol that last one could be real.... minus the *BLEEEP*

 

[TheOfficialSonicFanboy]

S: What... he looks just like me?
C: That's you Snake.
S: .... that's me? What are they doing around this place?
C: It's a clone. They took you and put on different colors
S: ... I don't look half bad.
C: Snake, this will be your most difficult battle.
S: This is so cliche...

---

S:Who is that kid back there?
C:It's a pokemon trainer. He uses his pokemon to fight for him.
S: Why can't I attack him?
C: Because he uses three pokemon, Squirtle, Ivysaur and Charizard.
S: No, why can't I attack him?
C: Because he is in the background.
S: curse you second dimension....

 

[Titan05]

Snake: Colonel, you've got to be kidding me with this one.
Campbell: Snake? What is it?
Snake: I know you said I'd be fighting some wierd stuff, but this is ridiculous.
Campbell: Why, Snake? What's going on?
Snake: As if the talking dinosaur and the electric mouse weren't enough...
Campbell: Snake, what on earth are you going on about?
Snake: I'm fighting myself.
Campbell: ...What?
Snake: I'm fighting myself.
Campbell: Metaphorically?
Snake: No. Literally. He's on the other edge of the arena. It looks like he's talking to another Colonel Campbell. He's wearing red for some reason. Have I ever worn red?
Campbell: Not that I can remember, Snake... can you hear what he's saying?
Snake: I think he's saying the exact same things that I'm saying.
Campbell: Looks like you'll need to take him down, Snake. Remember, his weaknesses will be yours. If he's really you, then you'll have to think up a strategy that you yourself wouldn't be able to think of.
Snake: ...this place is so f*king wierd.

Best one so far.

 

[Johnknight1]

*beep beep*

*screen pops up*

Solid Snake: Mei Ling, who is this guy?

Mei Ling: That he is actaully a she!...and her name is Samus.

Solid Snake: How can he, or rather she keep on all that armor and still run. It looks kind of heavy.

Mei Ling: That's from her intense training with the Chozo's, where she worked to become a powerful warrior.

Solid Snake: I bet she looks like a man....wait...that ball thing...woaw, SHE JUST BLEW UP MARIO!....woaw....woaw....woaw....she really looks like a man [/sarcasm]

Mei Ling: What are you talking about Snake? Did she grab the smash ball.

Solid Snake: IF you mean that circular ball thingy that made her glow, shoot a giant lazer, and make her take her clothes off [drolls], then YES!

Mei Ling: Look out, she's very fast, and very agile from her Chozo training.

Solid Snake: I wonder if she'll "Show Me Her Moves", like she did with Captain Falcon...

Mei Ling: ergh....disgusting Snake....

[Mei Ling hangs up]

5 minutes later...

[Colonial Campell calls, Snake picks up]

Colonial Campbell: Snake, I have special orders from the Penagon for you to find information on this "Subspace Army". They could be a threat.

Solid Snake: Be quiet Colonial. Samus just took her clothes off.

Colonial Campbell: BE QUIET!? Snake, the sake of the nation could be at....took her clothes off? CAN I HAVE A LOOK!? PRETTY PLEASE!?

Solid Snake: Here...

Colonial Campbell: I have to take my hands off the codec...ya know!

Solid Snake: Shh....BE QUIET!...she's going for one of those ball things again!

Colonial Campbell: o ya! No waz?

Solid Snake: Ya waz!

Colonial Campbell: Better get a better grip...

Solid Snake: Maybe...wait...here it COMES!

Colonial Campbell: What is coming? You, or her final smash?

Solid Snake: Both...woaw, she's doing it...her FINAL SMASH!

SolidSnake: MAN, she is glowing BRIGHT!...woaw...she's she's...

[calls Mei Ling, with Colonial Campbell still online]

Solid Snake: Mei Ling, Samus took her clothes off.

Mei Ling: Snake, how many times do I have to tell you that is her ZERO SUIT! [angry]

Solid Snake: No really, she's stark naked. Her final smash messed up, and her power suit blew up her normal suit...[sends a picture]

Mei Ling: Woaw, just woaw. She's got Luigi wrapped around her fingers. Daisy would be jealous.

Colonial Campbell: O ya....IT'S ALL COMING OUT!

Mei Ling: Well, I'll leave you be. She faster then ever, and you'll have to stay more focused on fighting Snake then looking at Samus Snake, okay?

Solid Snake: ughhh....

Mei Ling: ERGH!

[Mei Ling hangs up; Colonial Campbell is still on]

Colonial Campbell: Man, she's hot!

Solid Snake: You're telling me...

Colonial Campbell: Snake, I suggest you do to her what you did to Ike.

Solid Snake: Alright Colonial, I'll do it LONGERRRR though.

Colonial Campbell: Do it for the team, and remeber: SHE STOLE YOUR HEADBAND!

[end transmition]

 

[headbusa]

S: Hey, i made a new friend
0: what are you talking about snake this is a brawl you dont have time for friends...
S: But this guy is throwing bacon at me, it may be a little black and two dimensional but it still tastes like the real thing
O: That is mr. Game and Watch a retro character from nintendo's beginnings.
S: Good, he makes some awesome bacon, wonder where it all comes from?
O: I'd watch out if i were you snake, even though hes light and two dimensional you need to look out for his everyday objects packing a mean punch.
S: you mean he has punch to go with my bacon? I'm in heaven. Look hes pulling out his mechanical tendorizing hammer and its on speed 9 he must really like making me bacon.
O: NO! Snake LOOK OU......
S:*static feedback*
--------end transmision-----

 

[LavisFiend]

Snake:....

Otacon:.... Snake?

Snake: Shhhh...

Otacon: What's wrong Snake?

Snake: I am getting mean mugged by a little monkey in a red baseball cap...

Otacon: OH! That's Diddy Kong Snake, he's a friend of Donkey Kong.

Snake: *snicker a donkey monkey hybrid?

Otacon: Just a name Snake... don't get too crazy.

Snake:: Yea but still....

Otacon: Let me go ahead and stop you before you suggest that it is a hidden Nintendo sexual inneundo and tell you that his name is Donkey Kong because of the screeches he makes.

Snake: ..he heh...

Otacon: SNAKE!

Snake: Oh chill Otacon.. so uh...what's the story with this Diddy Kong?

Otacon: Diddy Kong is a far more nimble and quicker version of his partner Donkey Kong. His peanut cannons pack a powerful punch, so be sure to remember that if he hits you....

Snake: I must recover?

Otacon: Yes.

 

[kinghippo99]

heh heh funny

 

[Dragonbreath]

S: Otacon! This huge plant thing is attacking! What is it?!

O: It's known as Petey Pihranna. I don't really have that much information on him, but according to evidence, he's not so tough. You can defeat him easily by setting him on fire.

S: Fire? I'll keep that in mind. But. . .Something's bothering me.

O: Yes?

S: . . .What's under that speedo?

O: . . .You do that kind of reconnaissance on your own time, snake.

S: . . .That came out wrong. . .

 

[Magnacor]

Snake:....

Otacon:.... Snake?

Snake: Shhhh...

Otacon: What's wrong Snake?

Snake: I am getting mean mugged by a little monkey in a red baseball cap...

Otacon: OH! That's Diddy Kong Snake, he's a friend of Donkey Kong.

Snake: *snicker a donkey monkey hybrid?

Otacon: Just a name Snake... don't get too crazy.

Snake:: Yea but still....

Otacon: Let me go ahead and stop you before you suggest that it is a hidden Nintendo sexual inneundo and tell you that his name is Donkey Kong because of the screeches he makes.

Snake: ..he heh...

Otacon: SNAKE!

Snake: Oh chill Otacon.. so uh...what's the story with this Diddy Kong?

Otacon: Diddy Kong is a far more nimble and quicker version of his partner Donkey Kong. His peanut cannons pack a powerful punch, so be sure to remember that if he hits you....

Snake: I must recover?

Otacon: Yes.

The name Donkey Kong actually originated from kong meaning gorrila and someone got the word donkey confused with dumb. Off topic, I know, but I felt I should make that clear.

 

[F@lc0-san]

i saw someone else post this and thought it was funny so ill put it here

Why thank you ^_^

I'll try to make another one.

Snake: "Colonel, this Bipedal fox is attacking me!"
Colonel: "Thats Fox, Snake"
Snake: "I can see that, but who is he?"
Colonel: "No Snake, his name IS Fox."
Snake: "Wait so...he's a fox called.....Fox?"
Colonel: "So it seems Snake"
Snake: "hehehe, guess he was an unwanted child.."

 

[RedKnight]

this thread is so wierd

 

[Burninator]

The name Donkey Kong actually originated from kong meaning gorrila and someone got the word donkey confused with dumb. Off topic, I know, but I felt I should make that clear.

It actually came up when they were looking for synonyms for stubborn and ape.Donkeys are stubborn, Kong brings gorillas to mind. End.

 

[kinghippo99]

as are every one who posts here...

 

[Dubyah8r]

Snake: Hey Colonel, I thnk I'm starting to like that puffball guy better.
Colonel: Why's that Snake?
S: He's cooking that dinosuar thing.
C: That's Kirby's final smash, Snake, he boils his opponents.
S: Boils huh....I think it'd be better fried but I like the idea.
C: ...

 

[BokutoGuy]

lol this thread is cool

 

[kinghippo99]

Snake: Whats that?
Otacon: What is it Snake?
S: It's a giant turtle!
O: Yes Snake. That is Bowser.
S: I think I killed him...
O: Don't worry Snake. He'll reappear on a floating disk.
S: No, I mean I KILLED him. There is blood and guts everywhere.
O: ...
S: Wait! There is a card on him. Property of Gimpyfish... I wonder who that is?

 

[Tristan_win]

Two words
Crab Battle

 

[ComradeCanada]

S: Colonel, I've reached the target, I'm about to commence Mario in battle.
C: Excellent work, Snake! Get out there and show him what you're made of.
S: I wonder what he taste like....
C: ....

 

[Dojo999]

YES! The thread that would be king returns!

S: Colonel, who's this wiseguy?
C: What's he look like
S: He looks like some kind of robot ninja... with one eye.
C: Snake, that's ypur old nemesis Gray Fox.
S: Who now?
C: You fought him on shadow moses island.
S: .......
C: Snake you KILLED him!
S: I kill alot of people, sometimes i'll just kill someone for the fun of it.
C: Are you kidding me?
S: You know why Lucas is in now? Let's just say Ness had a little accident. And by accident i mean he was accidently skinned and cooked alive, and then he ACCIDENTILY fell into my mouth.
C:......
S: Yea, that's what happened.

 

[simplicityho]

^ .....Cannibalism in Brawl. I can't wait.

*beep beep*

*screen pops up*

Solid Snake: Mei Ling, who is this guy?

Mei Ling: That he is actaully a she!...and her name is Samus.

Solid Snake: How can he, or rather she keep on all that armor and still run. It looks kind of heavy.

Mei Ling: That's from her intense training with the Chozo's, where she worked to become a powerful warrior.

Solid Snake: I bet she looks like a man....wait...that ball thing...woaw, SHE JUST BLEW UP MARIO!....woaw....woaw....woaw....she really looks like a man [/sarcasm]

Mei Ling: What are you talking about Snake? Did she grab the smash ball.

Solid Snake: IF you mean that circular ball thingy that made her glow, shoot a giant lazer, and make her take her clothes off [drolls], then YES!

Mei Ling: Look out, she's very fast, and very agile from her Chozo training.

Solid Snake: I wonder if she'll "Show Me Her Moves", like she did with Captain Falcon...

Mei Ling: ergh....disgusting Snake....

[Mei Ling hangs up]

5 minutes later...

[Colonial Campell calls, Snake picks up]

Colonial Campbell: Snake, I have special orders from the Penagon for you to find information on this "Subspace Army". They could be a threat.

Solid Snake: Be quiet Colonial. Samus just took her clothes off.

Colonial Campbell: BE QUIET!? Snake, the sake of the nation could be at....took her clothes off? CAN I HAVE A LOOK!? PRETTY PLEASE!?

Solid Snake: Here...

Colonial Campbell: I have to take my hands off the codec...ya know!

Solid Snake: Shh....BE QUIET!...she's going for one of those ball things again!

Colonial Campbell: o ya! No waz?

Solid Snake: Ya waz!

Colonial Campbell: Better get a better grip...

Solid Snake: Maybe...wait...here it COMES!

Colonial Campbell: What is coming? You, or her final smash?

Solid Snake: Both...woaw, she's doing it...her FINAL SMASH!

SolidSnake: MAN, she is glowing BRIGHT!...woaw...she's she's...

[calls Mei Ling, with Colonial Campbell still online]

Solid Snake: Mei Ling, Samus took her clothes off.

Mei Ling: Snake, how many times do I have to tell you that is her ZERO SUIT! [angry]

Solid Snake: No really, she's stark naked. Her final smash messed up, and her power suit blew up her normal suit...[sends a picture]

Mei Ling: Woaw, just woaw. She's got Luigi wrapped around her fingers. Daisy would be jealous.

Colonial Campbell: O ya....IT'S ALL COMING OUT!

Mei Ling: Well, I'll leave you be. She faster then ever, and you'll have to stay more focused on fighting Snake then looking at Samus Snake, okay?

Solid Snake: ughhh....

Mei Ling: ERGH!

[Mei Ling hangs up; Colonial Campbell is still on]

Colonial Campbell: Man, she's hot!

Solid Snake: You're telling me...

Colonial Campbell: Snake, I suggest you do to her what you did to Ike.

Solid Snake: Alright Colonial, I'll do it LONGERRRR though.

Colonial Campbell: Do it for the team, and remeber: SHE STOLE YOUR HEADBAND!

[end transmition]

Not so thinly veiled sexual innuendo for the win.

 

[CodeBlack]

I'll try my hand at it. Lets see if anyone remembers the reference.

Snake: Who's this big guy?

Otacon: You'll have to be a bit more specific Snake.

Snake: Wait a minute... It's not a guy, it's a gorilla. And it's wearing a tie.

Otacon: Oh, yes. We know that monkey. His name is Donkey.

Snake: Oh, for the love of - DONKEYS ARE NOT MONKEYS. STOP MESSING WITH MY HEAD!

Otacon: Seriously Snake. His name is Donkey Kong, he lives on Kong Island. He's extremely strong -
Snake: (Sarcastically) No kidding.

Otacon: - so you'll have to be careful.

Snake: I've had just about enough of this craziness.

Otacon: Fight through it Snake, it's not over yet...

End Transmission.

 

[Hydde]

Snake: Otacon, what do you understand for "until now"?.
Otacon: Well, it means that it was before but not anymore, or something like that. Why you ask snake?.
Snake: but mmm..... but what about mother?
Otacon: what do you mean?.
Snake: you know, i will really miss that boy...even when i never met him before.
Otacon: Im sorry snake... sheedd happens.
Snake: Otacon... im sad.

End of transmission.

 

[Smashybashy]

S: Otacon! What is that!
O: What?
S: That thing! It looks like a boy with wings! And his clothes! He must be greek.
O: That's Pit, basically, he is an angel.
S: ... If he is an angel, why does he want to fight me?
O: Beats me.
S: That blade! It shoots arrows! I want one.
O: ...
S: If he is an angel, how can I fight back?
O: JUST HIT HIM, IT IS A GAME. THEY MADE IT SO THAT YOU CAN HURT HIM!
S: A game? That answers a ton of questions.. Wait, if it is a game then how did I get here?
O: They made the game with you in it.
S: If they made the game with me in it, how come I was invited?
O: Because they made it like that..
S: But I have done so much before this game even came out.
O: You're serious? Have you heard of something called the Metal Gear Solid series?
S: huh?
O: Idiot.

**END TRANSMISSION**

Ha, you broke the forth wall.

 

[KJC2004]

Beautiful. XD I can see him saying pretty much all of this.

I said this one to a friend over AIM..

"Otacon! I think I've found a pink Yoshi. Is that some kind of rare breed?"

"No, Snake. That's Birdo!"

"..BIRDO? A... a female Yoshi? Finally?"

"Um... Snake. Actually, I think Birdo is also a 'he' "

"... What the hell is it with these Nintendo characters?!?!"

haha, man that made my day!

 

[Smashybashy]

S: Otacon, What is this penguin.
O: His name is King Dedede.
S: Enough with the Carlos Mencia jokes, who is he.
O: It's King Dedede.
S: You're a dedede.
O: I'm telling you the truth, it's King Dedede.
S: What ever. Now lets see what this dedede tastle like.

 

[Kentalish]

Snake: Otacon!
Otacon: what is it snake
Snake: What is the monkey doing here
Otacon: That Is Diddy Kong Donkey Kongs best friend.. he has a peanut popgun and a jetpack
Snake: a popgun that shoots out peanuts and a jetpack??
Otacon: He is very fast and should not be underestamated!
Snake: This should be a piece of cake
Otacon: Ohh and snake?
Snake: yes
Otacon: watch out for the banana peels
Snake: what bannana pe.....*slip*

 

[Gamin Guru]

Snake Kills Mario

Colonel: SNAKE! What have you done.
Snake : ...
Colonel: YOU'VE CREATED A TIME PARADOX!

 

[SirroMinus1]

snake will defeat chuck norris

 

[PaperLink]

WWSD? This fails because his answer to anything is "BREAK HIS NECK".

 

[ComradeCanada]

????: SNAKE! Be careful! There's an airship waiting to ambush you there!
Snake: Who is this?
?????: You can call me Deepthroat, let's just say I'm a fan.
Snake: But.... You died!
?????: Hmm..... Call me Master Mushroom then.
Snake: .......


I think this would be an interesting plot twist.

 

[omfgomfg]

Snake: COLONEL!!!!
Colonel: It's pronounced KERNEL, not KAW LO NELL, Jesus. You seriously need to stop calling me!
Snake: Fine, thanks, colonel.
Colonel: IT'S KERNEL, OH MY GOD..

*end transmission*

Colonel to himself: Wait a sec, did Snake just call me without asking a question? Oh my GOD, this is a first.

 

[kinghippo99]

Snake: Who is this?
Colonel: Who Snake, Who?
S: Whoever it is it's paper thin.
C: Oh... that's just LIND-SAY LO-HAN.
S: She has a mustache...
C: Ohhhh... sorry, that is Paper Mario.
S: But it has a vagin@....
C: ...

 

[InvincibleAgent]

Snake: Otacon! Help!
Otacon: What? What is it, Snake?
S: There's a man at the gate, he's asking me to let him in!
O: What does he look like?
S: Well, he has a helmet, a blue jumpsuit, and he keeps saying "Show me your moves!"
O: Odd. There's no info on him at the Dojo. Must be a creep. Don't let him in, Snake. Sakurai didn't say he was invited.
S: Right. Over and out.

 

[CrenTIScO]

Snake: Otacon! What is this?
Otacon: Figure it out for your god dam self once in a while. Jeezus.
Snake: .....

 

[XACE-K]

Snake: What is this thing? Otacon: That's Mewtwo a psychic type.... Snake: Should I change controller port? Otacon: No, anyway he's a legendary pokemon that's a clone of the legendary pokemon Mew. Snake: Did you say clone? Otacon: Yeah. Why? Snake: I found myself a new best friend.

 

[Eltrotraw]

*two snakes are on the field*

Snake: Liquid!
Otacon: Calm down, Snake, it's only another version of you.
Snake: Hunh..?
Otacon: Snake, look, just watch out for its attacks, since it can do the same things as you.
Snake: Got it - hey... what?
*Colonel cuts in*
Colonel: Snake, you can't do that! The future will be changed! You'll create a time paradox!

 

[TengenToppaDrill]

Snake? SNAKE? SNAAAAAAAAAAKE?!?

New one:

Snake: Colonel, you've got to be kidding me with this one.
Campbell: Snake? What is it?
Snake: I know you said I'd be fighting some wierd stuff, but this is ridiculous.
Campbell: Why, Snake? What's going on?
Snake: As if the talking dinosaur and the electric mouse weren't enough...
Campbell: Snake, what on earth are you going on about?
Snake: I'm fighting myself.
Campbell: ...What?
Snake: I'm fighting myself.
Campbell: Metaphorically?
Snake: No. Literally. He's on the other edge of the arena. It looks like he's talking to another Colonel Campbell. He's wearing red for some reason. Have I ever worn red?
Campbell: Not that I can remember, Snake... can you hear what he's saying?
Snake: I think he's saying the exact same things that I'm saying.
Campbell: Looks like you'll need to take him down, Snake. Remember, his weaknesses will be yours. If he's really you, then you'll have to think up a strategy that you yourself wouldn't be able to think of.
Snake: ...this place is so f*king wierd.

I've always wondered what they would think.LOL

 

[TengenToppaDrill]

Snake: What is this thing? Otacon: That's Mewtwo a psychic type.... Snake: Should I change controller port? Otacon: No, anyway he's a legendary pokemon that's a clone of the legendary pokemon Mew. Snake: Did you say clone? Otacon: Yeah. Why? Snake: I found myself a new best friend.

Nice... Reference to Psyco Mantis.
This thread is gold.

 

[SolidSonic]

Raiden: Colonel what is this?
Colonel: Figure it out for your god dam self once in a while. Jeezus.
Raiden: .....

Fixed. Get it right next time.