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This is absolutely true. Sometimes I even want to triple post. But that just seems so whiney.
You found a room-mate? Congratulations! ^_^. Unless you had one the last time you posted and I just missed it completely lol. I'm glad you're making it through all of the **** you've been through this year. I hope 2013 is way better for you.People complaining that the gifts their parents got them weren't good enough? Shoot. I'd love to switch places with them. I don't even have living parents anymore as of this year. I really wish people would appreciate what they actually have. I'm not trying to be rude, it's just... stop looking at what you don't have and look at what you do have.
Edit: I guess as an example. While I did lose my mom this year, my ex cheated on me and backstabbed me multiple times, and I lost my home, I still look at the fact that I do have other family members who can be there as emotional support, and the fact that I've put in all the work and effort needed to make some new friends, and find an apartment that I'll get to move into this Saturday with a roommate. Things like that. Look at what you actually do have. It makes life work out better for you in the end.
is it even legal for them to take your security deposit and then tell one of you that you can't live there? Tenants have more rights than most people seem to be aware of. In the worse case maybe stay there for a month while finding a place that will accept you are your roommate, and then move there.And... now it's looking like I won't get to move soon... turns out the person that was going to be my roommate has some debt, and because of that, places won't let him rent. So now I have to figure out something to do. I've already paid the deposit and stuff and paid for utilities.
I would love so much, for something to actually go right in my life. I swear, every time I say "Well at least I have this" it ends up getting taken away.
I wonder what would happen though O.o
Let's just say sparks would fly...in more than one way.
I've been really close to doing this when I was tired as well xD
I had a nightmare once about accidentally putting my cat in the microwave, since then I was beyond careful about what I put in the microwave.
You know your situation better than I do. But if you had friends who had told you that you could stay with them then my advice to you would be to keep asking them. If they've changed their minds and won't let you stay with them anymore then obviously they're not friends you want, but please keep in mind that the worst they can do to you is say no. If you tell I'm about to be homeless and I'm asking you to help me like you said you would, then the worst that can come out of that is they don't help you and things stay the same, while on the other hand your problem maybe solved.This is frustrating. I've called literally every person I can think of, and hardly anyone answers their phones, and the few who do have no interest in helping me.
"Hey, could you ask your mom yet if I can stay with you guys a week while I look for an apartment?"
"Oh. I forgot to ask her. I'll ask her tomorrow."
That's been going on for over a month now. I'm about ready to just give up the thought of having a home and just live from my car because that's basically what things are boiling down to. Can't believe I had so many people say to my mom's face "Kevin can stay here with us after you pass away and we'll take care of him," and now when I need help, everyone's turned their backs on me.
And I tried to go out apartment hunting today but I've been so stressed that I've barely been sleeping and I can't focus and I feel physically ill because of it that I was having trouble even driving today. I was making some very bad calls with simple things such as turning out of a parking lot, so as soon as I realized that I went right back home because I don't want to risk getting into an accident while I'm feeling like this.
This does not make you pathetic at all. If you can admit something like this and not give a damm what others would say, that makes you a man. And more important, a human. Even the so called macho men can crack and have feelings. Hiding them so you can not seem like a wuss infront of people does not make you a man. Makes one a fraud and in my opinion, faking life. I have depression and axniety too. I had it since I was 12. im 24 now. So I know how it is. I actually wanted to kill myself 2 weeks ago. But held back.Hey guys. Haven't been on in a while since my laptop broke...
On an unrelated note, want to know how pathetic I am?
Okay for a little background, there's this girl I've loved going on 3 years now, who recently has been reciprocating those feelings now that she's single. I'm also still single. She doesn't want to go out with me because... wait for it... distance. 70 miles apart.
I worry, daily, that I will lose the only girl that's liked me back. I have anxiety attacks over it. And I let her know too. By being extremely blunt about it. Every time. She puts up with me. She tells me not to worry. But 70 miles... she could easily just find someone else.
We've had our ups and downs... but my anxiety and depression usually get the best of me and I accidentally question the trust betweenn us constantly even though my brain tells me that I trust her fully.
It hurts her, and it hurts me that it hurts her.
Also, she tends to ignore my texts and tweets to like... tweet and stuff with her other friends. I don't know. At least that's what it seems like.
And I HATE twitter. I only use it to follow her and get her attention when necessary...
Anyway, its 4AM right now. Her lady friend is with her and she sleeping like a normal person would at 4am. I woke up early, probably from some nightmare. I get on the intnernet and I see her smilingn face on tumblr with her friend.
Then I break down.
I'm laying here, crying, heavy hearted, because I realized how pathetic I actually am. To keep her smiling, I should just not talk to her for a while! At least that's what my dumb *** told her... while she's asleep. I told her I wouldn't talk to her today so I don't ruin her day. I cry. I vennt to my other friend, also asleep, because I have uncontrolable feels at the moment and would like sleep. That doesn't help. I cry more. Then I send a really long sob story message to my love; pretty much apologizing for everything, telling her I am so very much in love with her, asking for forgiveness, and some longwinded explaination that can only be described with some frankenstine abomanation of cheesy love songs.
And right now, its 4:44. I'm crying still. Slightly. My chest really hurts and I find it hard to breathe. All I want is her happiness. And all I do is screw things up. I'm such a terrible awful pathetic screwup.
Thanks for reading. I just needed to get this somewhere where someone awake could possibly read it so I would feel less pathetic.
-Kevin
When my anxiety and nerves get the best of me I jump to radical conclusions about her being with another guy even though she always comforts me and tells me not to worry.