ChunkySlugger72
Smash Lord
- Joined
- Jul 2, 2018
- Messages
- 1,834
You pretty much hit the nail on the head regarding Conker when he becomes topic of discussion, It's not that no one wants him, It's just that most people are trying to be realistic when it comes Smash speculation.Because this is the speculation thread, I wanted to make a case for my most wanted because why the hell not (and no, I'm not saying this character is likely because they aren't at all.) If you think your character is a pipe dream, this guy is really a pipe dream. Maybe some discussion can be generated from this post, because whenever this character is brought up. they're almost instantly dismissed, which is fair, but I still feel an urge to make this post. I'm talking about non other than my ol' pal:
What's in Conker's Favor?
- He's arguably Rare's go-to character after Banjo.
- I'm not discrediting Battletoads, don't worry. It's just that wherever Banjo appears, Conker is 90% of the time alongside him in Rare/Xbox promotional materials.
- Conker's brand image is trusted enough by Microsoft to promote their products.
- Conker has been used by Microsoft to promote both Project Spark (getting an inkling of a new adventure as well as an HD render), while simultaneously appearing to promote the Microsoft HoloLens in Young Conker (2016). Young Conker specifically is pretty hated, but it's still an example of Microsoft utilizing Conker's image in recent times.
- Conker could play as a fun mix-up/wild-card character; he'd be unique.
- There's a common notion that all Conker does is drink and swear, but that's actually far from the truth. Aside from few and far between cutscenes, Conker is only playable while drunk in two levels. In every other level, he's incredibly nimble, uses a trusty frying pan, slingshot, guns, a sword, and can even ride/attack using an anthropomorphic pitchfork! Conker can work perfectly fine with a moveset that captures his likeness even without M-rated gags. But his coolest and most iconic feature: context sensitive!
- Context Sensitive: In Bad Fur Day, this move basically allowed Conker to tap into the powers of cartoon logic. Depending on the situation, Conker do a number of things, from turning himself into a falling anvil, whipping out a rocket launcher, creating a dynamite trap. A neutral B that changes depending on the circumstances would be a cool, never before seen feature in Smash.
- Conker still receives merchandise alongside Banjo.
- Companies such as First 4 Figures and Totaku have recently released high quality figurines of Conker, which once again goes to show that Conker, in some regard, is believed to be marketable/recognizable by someone at Microsoft/Rare. Here are pictures of the figurines in case anyone wanted to see:
- Conker can be arguably considered a Nintendo character in a sorta-kinda similar way to Banjo (a stretch, I know)
- Outside of Banjo, Conker is the only playable character in Diddy Kong Racing to have a spin-off franchise. And although this is a major, major stretch, I thought it'd be cool to share that Conker appeared in the German Club Nintendo comics "N-Gang" from 1999-2000, alongside other historical video game characters like Mega Man and Bomberman.
- Finally, Conker would bring with him lots of new music, spirits, and creative alternate costume choices:
- Aside from the Great Mighty Poo song, there's lots of great numbers from the score of Bad Fur Day that would be great to expanding music of Smash, like the iconic 'Windy' theme that many have heard at some point even if they haven't played the game ('Rock Solid' is one of the best tracks in gaming history, just saying.) Of course, there are notable characters, enemies, and bosses that could easily become spirits. And Conker also has a variety of outfits from Bad Fur Day/Live and Reloaded, alongside copying color palettes from existing characters for a variety of alt-costume choices. Here's what I had in mind:
What isn't in Conker's favor?
- When it comes to choosing a second Rare rep for Smash, next to no one wants Conker compared to other fanbases.
- Battletoads, Joanna Dark, hell, even James Bond from GoldenEye 64 are more wanted than Conker. It's not that nobody likes Conker or doesn't want him anywhere near Smash Bros, most just see him and think "Smash? Yeah, that's never happening, moving on."
- He has virtually no presence in Japan.
- Bad Fur Day never released in Japan, and I'm not sure if Live and Reloaded ever did. I'm sure there are some fans from Japan, like with any character, but nothing even close to substantial enough to merit even an eyebrow raise.
- Chris Seavor says it's probably never happening.
- I spoke a few times with the director of Bad Fur Day, Chris Seavor, on Twitter about the prospect of Conker joining Smash. He told me he'd be down for it to happen and he'd come back to voice the squirrel, but in his own words, it just isn't likely to happen.
- Most damning of all, Conker hails from the South Park of video games.
- Lots of M-rated characters are considered 'legitimate' picks to join Smash, but Conker's case is different. He doesn't come from an FPS game, or a beat-em-up. He comes from a game that references alcohol, drugs, sex, contains swearing, crude humor that has aged poorly (in today's context), and a boss that is a literal pile of feces singing opera. Not exactly the ideal candidate Nintendo is looking for (although Nintendo of America did release official Conker's Bad Fur Day condoms at a promotional event lol.)
This post isn't to be taken too seriously, I just wanted to see if any discussion could be generated from it. A lot of people instantly dismiss Conker because "a drunk squirrel can't be given proper justice in Smash!" but I really do think there's more to the character than just that. All of Conker's abilities and weapons are kid-friendly, and even the ones that aren't (such as guns and rocket launchers) are already in Smash. The only aspects that are legitimately against Conker in my opinion is his lack of presence in Japan, and his source material. The character, by himself, can be easily worked around to fit the ESRB rating of Smash.
I'd take a Mii Costume, even some spirits. I know many view Bad Fur Day as a disgusting, low-hanging fruit game, but to me and many others, the game is an immensely fun and creative spin on the 3D platforming genre, one that gave the middle finger to Super Mario 64 and Banjo-Kazooie to deliver a unique experience that will likely never be replicated in gaming again. Although some humor is face-palming inducing, a good amount was subtle and very clever, and all the movie references were awesome to see!
Just wish this poor guy got some acknowledgement. Give me a Conker spirit, and I'm good to go!
I'm a big fan of most things Rare and would absolutely love Conker to join in Smash, Most Including myself unfortunately don't see it happening (No Surprise), I personally see Master Chief as the next most likely Microsoft rep (Who I'm cool with) But if for whatever reason he does makes it in then you bet your ass I would pay and download him the second he drops.
Banjo-Kazooie is the only character I bought so far in the fighter pass and I would love for Conker to join his old Rare buddies Diddy Kong, DK and King K. Rool in Super Smash Bros Ultimate.
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