How should I feel about these decisions?

[Kewkky]

Link to original post: How should I feel about these decisions?



I didn't do as well as my other college semesters in college, so I planned everything I was gonna do during the upcoming college year (2010-2011). So, let me get this off my mind...


I have had an enormously strong dislike for my father ever since I was young (i'll skip all of my personal stories). So, I decided that I wasn't gonna share anything with him anymore. Still, he asked me to show him my grades for this semester, and seeing as I didn't do as well as my previous semesters, I tricked him into believing everything went differently for me.

I plan on spending the year 2010-2011 in a full-time job, to buy a car, rent an apartment, buy a better cellphone, and some other personal stuff... And skip college through that whole year to get enough money as fast as possible. My dad would probably die if he knew this, and he would explode if he saw my grades (not that bad, but worse than usual). So, I saved the webpage my grades are displayed on, used java to edit my grades, and made it so every time the link to my grades is clicked in my computer, my edited 'grades' window would take the place of the original. This worked to perfection, they didn't suspect a thing and are now content with what they saw. How did I do it? Well, i'm not gonna post it, just take my word for it.

I've lied to him severely in the past, but I've never ouright done this kind of manipulation before. It makes me feel cool cuz I successfully tampered with information in a hostile environment (if my dad would find out, I would be in deep ****), but at the same time it makes me wonder about the amount of bad stuff that would come my way if it didn't come through and my parents found out I was lying to them to that extent...

I turn 21 in June 26, and as it says everywhere, that's the year when I can legally make my own decisions. At that point I will be able to talk however I wish to my family, reveal any secrets I feel I should reveal (inb4 gay assumptions, i'm not gay ), and possibly even let them know of my plans for the next couple of years. I'm planning on telling them that I won't take classes the next year in order to focus on other priorities, but as members of the past generation, they're not gonna take it well.

So, what do you guys think about me manipulating them like that? Pretty much hacking the web page in a way that they won't figure out if its real or not? And me not telling them about my plans until the semester's right around the corner? Think it's only natural a guy would act that way to parents he dislikes, or should I give them once again the benefit of the doubt, and come out with the truth about my grades and blah blah

 

[El Nino]

What are your other priorities, and is there any reason why they can't wait until after college. Taking a break from school and going back later is difficult. Unless your other priorities can't wait for whatever reason, I would advise you to put all your effort into finishing school before moving on to your other plans, at which point you could have that open talk with your family.

Lying almost always makes things worse, in my experience. It has a way of becoming it's own problem, which compounds onto the existing problem. When families can't communicate, it makes things hard. Manipulation makes it worse because if you plan on revealing yourself to them when you turn 21, you're going to have to tell them what you did. You probably wouldn't like it if they manipulated you, so they're probably not going to like that you did it to them. On the other hand, you could just not tell them about what you did with your grades, but in that case they wouldn't understand why you want to take a break from school.

I don't know your full story, so I don't want to say too much. I think if you need a break from school, you'd get more sympathy by being open and honest about your grades. If you're taking a break for reasons other than academic hardship, I think you can probably re-evaluate your other priorities and see if they can't wait until after school. School is one thing I don't recommend drawing out longer than you have to, unless you have serious problems that need to be taken care of.

 

[Kewkky]

Well, like I said, I feel like I need to take a break from the pressure of "progressing". I'm a mellow person, in that I know I have all the time in the world to finish what I've started (although I'm reasonable with the time I'll be using for other stuff). Reason why I'm not gonna attend college for this year is that I want to get a full-time job, maybe even a side job as well, to make the money I'll need for everything I need (moving away from the family residence [psychological benefit], a car [sociological benefit], a cellphone [sociological benefit], other personal things that are best settled before continuing college). Plus, a little time away from academic responsibilities should help all of the stress I've gone through so far by being a math major dissipate, so I'll come back with a stronger will, and a better sense of achievement.

But yeah, the other stuff should come first before college. It'll improve my life's quality by a lot, physically, mentally and (maybe?) spiritually. So personally, I see it like a step I should hurry up and take. But, having insight from other people would be a good idea before I carry on with my decision, so your input is greatly appreciated.

 

[Steven9wii]

woa Woa WOA!!! lying? and grade changing? this is particularly evil stuff right there may i say.

 

[Kewkky]

woa Woa WOA!!! lying? and grade changing? this is particularly evil stuff right there may i say.

No, I didn't really change my grades. They're still the same. What I did was save a copy of the website, and edit that copy, which would only be viewable in my own computer... So, I avoided a situation where I would've gone through a lot of problems, and most of the plans I've had ready for my future would've been destroyed.

What I did was like... Photoshop a picture with my face on it well enough so that people would actually believe it was real. But in this case, the "people" was my father and no one else.

 

[MikeKirby]

Wow... that's pure genius. Dr. Evil would be jealous. I hope the lie doesn't come back in smack you in the face. I'm a horrible lier and I would just deal with the consequence head on. What you did was total genius, though. I don't think they'll ever figure it out. Just cross your fingers they don't go snooping around. It sounds like your determined. And hey, it does buy you time so you don't get to hear the nagging. Good luck.

Pure genius...

 

[El Nino]

I guess what I'm suggesting is if you feel like you might fail your classes at this rate, then yeah, take a break. But if you think you can still pull through, then don't take a break because whatever full time job you get now isn't going to pay as much as what you can get with your degree. Granted, I don't know what math majors do after graduation.

Anyway, good luck making your decision.

 

[Kewkky]

Wow... that's pure genius. Dr. Evil would be jealous. I hope the lie doesn't come back in smack you in the face. I'm a horrible lier and I would just deal with the consequence head on. What you did was total genius, though. I don't think they'll ever figure it out. Just cross your fingers they don't go snooping around. It sounds like your determined. And hey, it does buy you time so you don't get to hear the nagging. Good luck.

Pure genius...

:F

I just had to share somewhere what I did to avoid an emotional/psychological breakdown when I least wanted one... And how it worked flawlessly, even though it was my first time doing so. I'm not making a habit of it though, this is the first and last time I plan on doing that. But, at least I now know I have a new option ready for when I run out of all the other ones.

I guess what I'm suggesting is if you feel like you might fail your classes at this rate, then yeah, take a break. But if you think you can still pull through, then don't take a break because whatever full time job you get now isn't going to pay as much as what you can get with your degree. Granted, I don't know what math majors do after graduation.

Anyway, good luck making your decision.

Well, I'm planning on working full-time for the whole year, saving up money, then when the year's over, switch to a part-time or two and get back to college refreshed, relaxed and at peace. And yep, it's got to do with me not wanting to keep dropping my grades (since it's been a trend for the past couple of classes), but only partially.

 

[MikeKirby]

Hmmm... you pay for college yourself? Just remember, that a car is a lot of up keep, depending on it's current bought condition. Then add the cost of insurance for it. Then again, I'm not sure about how PR goes about insuring a car (are you forced to insure?). Then, you have the monthly bills on cell phones unless it's prepaid. Then an apartment and... *mind explodes*. I just hope at the end of it all you're still able to go back and finish college.

 

[El Nino]

I just had to share somewhere what I did to avoid an emotional/psychological breakdown when I least wanted one...

That's new information. If you were really that close to a mental breakdown, take a break. Mental health isn't all that different from physical health. Go back to school when you're ready.

 

[-Ran]

Withholding the truth places a great burden upon your psyche.

 

[Kewkky]

Hmmm... you pay for college yourself? Just remember, that a car is a lot of up keep, depending on it's current bought condition. Then add the cost of insurance for it. Then again, I'm not sure about how PR goes about insuring a car (are you forced to insure?). Then, you have the monthly bills on cell phones unless it's prepaid. Then an apartment and... *mind explodes*. I just hope at the end of it all you're still able to go back and finish college.

Yep, I know about everything, which is the reason I want a job. Bonthly/weekly payment will help keep my stuff paid for... And nope, there's no need to insure your car here. Only thing you have to pay for your car is the yearly sticker/stamp thing you put on your car (which we call 'marbete'), and fixing it whenever it breaks down, so not much money spent on cars here.

That's new information. If you were really that close to a mental breakdown, take a break. Mental health isn't all that different from physical health. Go back to school when you're ready.

Well, yeah, I wasn't prepared to handle all that he was about to say (what with other personal stuff in my mind, if I would've gotten angry/anguished, I would've exploded then and there, and said lots of things I would regret for years). And I really believe that leaving my family's house and living by myself will make me a happier person (I've done so before during my first college year [moved back cuz my family moved closer to college], so I have experience living alone).

Withholding the truth places a great burden upon your psyche.

I don't believe in me suffering because of a lie. In fact, I as a human being have lied a lot in the past, so I know how guilty I would've felt. Truth is, I'm used to the feeling so I'm not really bothered by it, it's just something that I drown in the middle of all my other thoughts... I view this situation more along the lines of "postponing the truth", since the only thing I'm gaining from it is time.


By the way, my parents have had very high expectations of me all my life. I was brought to a psychologist when I was 7 years old, and amongst other personal things, he said I had an IQ of 137, and they've hung onto that statement and made it into a law around the house. So, I'm always supposed to be doing great in everything, and being smarter than everyone and blah blah blah.

 

[Metal~Mario]

I don't believe in me suffering because of a lie. In fact, I as a human being have lied a lot in the past, so I know how guilty I would've felt. Truth is, I'm used to the feeling so I'm not really bothered by it, it's just something that I drown in the middle of all my other thoughts... I view this situation more along the lines of "postponing the truth", since the only thing I'm gaining from it is time.


By the way, my parents have had very high expectations of me all my life. I was brought to a psychologist when I was 7 years old, and amongst other personal things, he said I had an IQ of 137, and they've hung onto that statement and made it into a law around the house. So, I'm always supposed to be doing great in everything, and being smarter than everyone and blah blah blah.

Were we separated at birth? This is waaaaaay too similar to my current situtation. However, I can say that taking a break from school will backfire somehow. I wouldn't recommend it.

Also, IQ is not an accurate measure of intelligence.

 

[AMKalmar]

As your father, whether he expresses it or not, I'm sure he's proud of you for how well he thinks you are doing in school. You're only hurting your relationship with him more by being dishonest with him. I think the best thing for you to do would be to talk with him, tell him the truth, and tell him how you feel.

Don't try to justify your actions by saying you'll tell him the truth later.

 

[Romulox2010]

Son..I am disappoint

 

[Jim Morrison]

You're a pretty cool guy as far as I read.

 

[#HBC | Acrostic]

My fourteen year old sister did this to her freshman year grades in order to prevent being found out. She's way too scared of my parents and cares too much about being acknowledged by them. If she had any backbone, she would just tell them the truth. Then again she's only fourteen. Maybe when she turns fifteen she will mature enough and value her education so that she doesn't need to make excuses for her short comings and can accept her mistakes as part of who she is as a person. I'm not sure though. She took this I.Q. test online and got a high score. Now she is completely conceited even though she struggled with her first year in high school. I guess people actually take those things seriously, even though they have no bearing on the future.

Oh sorry about that. I think that you're a pretty cool guy for hiding from your parents and looking forward to "stagnation" instead of "progression." I think that we could be best friends. Bro fist.

 

[Kewkky]

Also, IQ is not an accurate measure of intelligence.

I know, I know... I'm a math major, but have been contemplating for a while going into psychology, and my mother's got a doctorate on psychology, so I got lots of books around the house about the stuff. It doesn't mean that they feel the same way about IQ though.

As your father, whether he expresses it or not, I'm sure he's proud of you for how well he thinks you are doing in school. You're only hurting your relationship with him more by being dishonest with him. I think the best thing for you to do would be to talk with him, tell him the truth, and tell him how you feel.

Don't try to justify your actions by saying you'll tell him the truth later.

"Proud of me", huh... More like "not disappointed in me". You're looking at the glass half-full, while I'm looking at "half a cup of water inside a cup".

\Oh sorry about that. I think that you're a pretty cool guy for hiding from your parents and looking forward to "stagnation" instead of "progression." I think that we could be best friends. Bro fist.

I don't think you read my recent replies. I didn't do that in order to "hide from my parent's rage", I did it because I KNOW what's gonna happen, and I'd much rather not go through the whole situation of having someone I dislike lecture me on stuff I shouldn't be lectured on. I decided a long time ago I wasn't gonna show him my grades ever again, and I haven't shown him my grades for a year-and-a-half, so since he randomly asked for them after an argument we had, I decided to show him what he wanted to see and shut him up for good. I keep my decision (not confiding in him anything), and he's content with what he saw. Not like he's gonna be able to see my grades once I move out anyway, so it's no deal at all.

I'm tired of having to put up with him. I'm tired of hearing him rage over the stupidest things. And I'm tired of him controlling my actions presently by saying he's the one who pays the bills and gives me money to go out and gives me a roof to live in blah blah blah. So, what I want to do is move out of the house. Once I'm out of the house and with a job, he's OBVIOUSLY gonna be the same guy as when I lived there, since 21 is pretty much the "independence" year, and since he won't be able to control me with anything, I'll be able to talk to him eye-to-eye without worrying about "he's gonna hide the car keys", or "he's not gonna give me the money I need for blablabla"... I'll be 21 in 7 days now, and am about to start searching for a job in MANY different places, pretty much assuring that I'll get at least one. I think I have the right to decide doing things with the least fighting and disagreement, than doing things the "moral" way and end up in yet another big argument with him.

All I want is a place were I can go where he won't be able to control me, and that I'll be able to control my own life. Once I have that, I'll be able to confront my dad NOT BECAUSE I'LL GET SCARED OR WHATEVER, but because I know he won't be able to do anything except either listen to me, or ignore me... Which he can do right now as well, but he can also limit my options presently (not give me money for anything [not even gas money], hide the keys to the cars so I can't drive anywhere, not invite me to trips, etc)... To me, my decision's the smartest, although I lie to him in the process in order to go through with it. Isn't the reason most people lie, to not have to deal with unwanted situations? Having yet another argument with him does not help me become a better person at all, all it does is make me want to leave the house even faster.

Son..I am disappoint

Explain to me why you're disappointed.

 

[Romulox2010]

Lol nah jus meme quotin' I couldn't pass up the opportunity seeing the position you were just in. But no I am not disappoint, in fact that was quite clever.

 

[SuperBowser]

Do your parents pay your college fees?

 

[Kewkky]

Do your parents pay your college fees?

Sorta. I get a scholarship, but it's not enough to cover my college fees. My dad works at my college, so I get an exemption for the rest of the money I can't pay. My dad has to sign it, though.

 

[RATED]

Sorta. I get a scholarship, but it's not enough to cover my college fees. My dad works at my college, so I get an exemption for the rest of the money I can't pay. My dad has to sign it, though.

yo kewkky, yeah is weird talking to you in SWF since we are friends IRL but yeah IMO u should take the " school break", get a job, move from your house since I know that u want it that much and get the car but don't get a new car, so that you don't have to pay it monthly and have to work more and study less when you start college again.

since I know what's having "parents pressure" telling your studies, expectations and all that stuff. I used to study Political Science for it and that was until I "exploded" and told everything.( I used to hide my grades) and now I am studying what I wanted, but you know I did a "change" moving and all that stuff.


with that I am telling you that I recommend you to talk to your mom about it, so that she can/could/may help you about it before talking to your dad. I had to talk to my dad too about it(grades, changes, and all of that).

yeah, if u want to talk about it, you can talk to me in msn/phone/irl

 

[pickle962]

Link to original post: How should I feel about these decisions?



I didn't do as well as my other college semesters in college, so I planned everything I was gonna do during the upcoming college year (2010-2011). So, let me get this off my mind...


I have had an enormously strong dislike for my father ever since I was young (i'll skip all of my personal stories). So, I decided that I wasn't gonna share anything with him anymore. Still, he asked me to show him my grades for this semester, and seeing as I didn't do as well as my previous semesters, I tricked him into believing everything went differently for me.

I plan on spending the year 2010-2011 in a full-time job, to buy a car, rent an apartment, buy a better cellphone, and some other personal stuff... And skip college through that whole year to get enough money as fast as possible. My dad would probably die if he knew this, and he would explode if he saw my grades (not that bad, but worse than usual). So, I saved the webpage my grades are displayed on, used java to edit my grades, and made it so every time the link to my grades is clicked in my computer, my edited 'grades' window would take the place of the original. This worked to perfection, they didn't suspect a thing and are now content with what they saw. How did I do it? Well, i'm not gonna post it, just take my word for it.

I've lied to him severely in the past, but I've never ouright done this kind of manipulation before. It makes me feel cool cuz I successfully tampered with information in a hostile environment (if my dad would find out, I would be in deep ****), but at the same time it makes me wonder about the amount of bad stuff that would come my way if it didn't come through and my parents found out I was lying to them to that extent...

I turn 21 in June 26, and as it says everywhere, that's the year when I can legally make my own decisions. At that point I will be able to talk however I wish to my family, reveal any secrets I feel I should reveal (inb4 gay assumptions, i'm not gay ), and possibly even let them know of my plans for the next couple of years. I'm planning on telling them that I won't take classes the next year in order to focus on other priorities, but as members of the past generation, they're not gonna take it well.

So, what do you guys think about me manipulating them like that? Pretty much hacking the web page in a way that they won't figure out if its real or not? And me not telling them about my plans until the semester's right around the corner? Think it's only natural a guy would act that way to parents he dislikes, or should I give them once again the benefit of the doubt, and come out with the truth about my grades and blah blah

Not to be rude or nothing, but what you did will eventually come back to haunt you. Trust me, it will come back to haunt you.

 

[Kewkky]

Not to be rude or nothing, but what you did will eventually come back to haunt you. Trust me, it will come back to haunt you.

Every action has a reaction. Why should this decision only have a negative outcome? Why can't it have a positive outcome? Is it some force of nature that makes it so? Think about that.

 

[#HBC | Acrostic]

I don't think you read my recent replies. I didn't do that in order to "hide from my parent's rage", I did it because I KNOW what's gonna happen, and I'd much rather not go through the whole situation of having someone I dislike lecture me on stuff I shouldn't be lectured on.

Surprise! Parents are supposed to patronize and correct the stupid mistakes made by their stupid kids. It's supposed to be unpleasant so that you learn your lesson and attempt to reach some level of understanding with your parents. I could list hundreds of stuff that I don't like doing, but that doesn't change the fact that I still have to do them. If you don't like people lecturing you, then maybe you really don't belong in college. No matter how much you grow, you're never bigger than your parents. If you can't even handle your own parents getting into your face, then I don't understand how you're going to deal with obnoxious customers, co-workers, and a boss telling you what you need to do. No one likes other people telling them that they ****ed up, but guess what, you ****ed up and now you're just running away from the consequences of having to deal with an unpleasant experience between you and your parents. Oh yeah, it's not going to end like a Disney Film, DUH.

I decided a long time ago I wasn't gonna show him my grades ever again, and I haven't shown him my grades for a year-and-a-half, so since he randomly asked for them after an argument we had, I decided to show him what he wanted to see and shut him up for good.

Oh yeah, you sure showed him. You shut him up with a lie. That's ****ed up. You didn't do jack **** and yet you still keep on telling the internet how much of a burden it is to deal with your father. How about dealing with an obnoxious ****-sucking son whose a liar. Christ. You think your dad needs to shut up? At least he's not on the internet trying to justify the fact that he lied to his own parents because he screwed up on his own and can't accept the responsibility of his actions. I think your dad is justified to ask you for your grades, ESPECIALLY because you did slip up. I don't know any parent that wants to see their kid act like a little coward and avoid manning up to his mistakes.

I keep my decision (not confiding in him anything), and he's content with what he saw. Not like he's gonna be able to see my grades once I move out anyway, so it's no deal at all.

No. The deal is that you made a mistake, you can't take responsibility for it, you lied to your parents, AND you're in denial about how you should feel about yourself and your actions because you have your head too far up your ***. It's no wonder that conceited *******s can't see themselves, even when the truth comes to light.

I'm tired of having to put up with him. I'm tired of hearing him rage over the stupidest things. And I'm tired of him controlling my actions presently by saying he's the one who pays the bills and gives me money to go out and gives me a roof to live in blah blah blah. So, what I want to do is move out of the house. Once I'm out of the house and with a job, he's OBVIOUSLY gonna be the same guy as when I lived there, since 21 is pretty much the "independence" year, and since he won't be able to control me with anything, I'll be able to talk to him eye-to-eye without worrying about "he's gonna hide the car keys", or "he's not gonna give me the money I need for blablabla"... I'll be 21 in 7 days now, and am about to start searching for a job in MANY different places, pretty much assuring that I'll get at least one. I think I have the right to decide doing things with the least fighting and disagreement, than doing things the "moral" way and end up in yet another big argument with him.

Oh wow, your dad sounds worse than mine. My dad only did some minor misdemeanors like trying to strangle my mom and smashing my head in with an empty vodka bottle. But wow, your dad rages about stupid things. Your dad sounds real bad bro. He sounds like a real mother ****er. In seven days you're going to magically grow a pair and actually say what you want to say? Why can't you be a man right now and tell him how you really feel instead of holding it off to some contrived date that only indicates that you're seven days closer to death, senility, and stupidity.

All I want is a place were I can go where he won't be able to control me, and that I'll be able to control my own life. Once I have that, I'll be able to confront my dad NOT BECAUSE I'LL GET SCARED OR WHATEVER, but because I know he won't be able to do anything except either listen to me, or ignore me... Which he can do right now as well, but he can also limit my options presently (not give me money for anything [not even gas money], hide the keys to the cars so I can't drive anywhere, not invite me to trips, etc)... To me, my decision's the smartest, although I lie to him in the process in order to go through with it. Isn't the reason most people lie, to not have to deal with unwanted situations? Having yet another argument with him does not help me become a better person at all, all it does is make me want to leave the house even faster.

Your dad gave you an education, he gives you GAS MONEY, he gives you a home. Some dads just leave their kids and give them nothing. And other dads... they give their kids a broken home, a damaged mom that needs to be taken care of by her own children, and the responsibility to forgive a father whose screwed them over in more ways then they could even count. If you're not even going to try to be a decent human being, then why should I treat you like a decent human being? I'm just telling you how you should feel about your decisions. You should feel bad about yourself.

 

[§witch]

[wrecked]

I could not have said it better myself.

 

[El Nino]

@Acrostic: Though I agree with some of your points, I've never seen this approach work. I think we both know that there are a lot of people out there who have it worse than us, but our bad days are still bad, and contemplating other people's problems don't necessarily make them easier. Knowing about something is not the same as experiencing it.

@Kewkky: Perhaps you should listen to your friend and get your mother to be the buffer between you and your father. Whether or not you come clean about lying is up to you, but I think it'd help you if you at least clued them in to the fact that you were having some difficulties (whether in school or other things). I know you said that school is not your main reason for you decision, but at least give them some indication that you're not just giving up on your education to run around for a year. The thing is, if your father seems unsympathetic, or if he doesn't understand your decision, it's because in his mind you were doing just fine in school, and you were the one who gave him that misinformation. So, the communication between the two of you on that subject is going to be deceptive from now on.

I understand you on wanting to be away from home. But if you're not comfortable telling the whole truth, is it possible that you could tell a partial truth that would help your parents get a better understanding of your situation at the very least?

 

[Kewkky]

I find it funny how I haven't disclosed a single personal secret or past event, and you now think that I'm just some angsty teenager who thinks he's the most unlucky guy on the planet. Reason is, there's people I know in real life who visit this web page, and there are details of my life I'd rather keep to myself. If you're going to be THAT naive as to believe what you think is what happened without even a bit of proof, then I don't think I have to put up with you. But just to keep you humored...

Surprise! Parents are supposed to patronize and correct the stupid mistakes made by their stupid kids. It's supposed to be unpleasant so that you learn your lesson and attempt to reach some level of understanding with your parents. I could list hundreds of stuff that I don't like doing, but that doesn't change the fact that I still have to do them. If you don't like people lecturing you, then maybe you really don't belong in college. No matter how much you grow, you're never bigger than your parents. If you can't even handle your own parents getting into your face, then I don't understand how you're going to deal with obnoxious customers, co-workers, and a boss telling you what you need to do. No one likes other people telling them that they fucked up, but guess what, you fucked up and now you're just running away from the consequences of having to deal with an unpleasant experience between you and your parents. Oh yeah, it's not going to end like a Disney Film, DUH.

There's a big difference between living with people 24 hours a day for 21 years, and seeing teacher's faces for 1-3 hours 4 days a week/being around your boss 8 hours 4-5 days a week.

"No matter how much you grow, you'll never be bigger than your parents?" What do you think you are, saying stupid stuff like that? Are you possibly hinting that my parents are saints and have never done such things in their lives? We're all human, we all make decisions based on what each of us thinks is right. And guess what? I, knowing every single detail of my current situation, arrived at the conclusion that my decision was the best one.

And I know it won't have a happy ending. Truth be told, my parents won't have enough influence in the rest of my life to really matter at all. My dad left his house after he finished college because he had everything paid for by his father, then he never went back, not even to visit. Are you telling me that it's impossible to live a life away from my family? Well, hell, guess I'd better not live out of my country, huh?

Oh yeah, you sure showed him. You shut him up with a lie. That's fucked up. You didn't do jack shit and yet you still keep on telling the internet how much of a burden it is to deal with your father. How about dealing with an obnoxious cock-sucking son whose a liar. Christ. You think your dad needs to shut up? At least he's not on the internet trying to justify the fact that he lied to his own parents because he screwed up on his own and can't accept the responsibility of his actions. I think your dad is justified to ask you for your grades, ESPECIALLY because you did slip up. I don't know any parent that wants to see their kid act like a little coward and avoid manning up to his mistakes.

I could report your post for flaming, but I won't just because I'm enjoying crushing you right now.

You must be a very naive person to think that all problems can be solved by being a nice little boy. But guess what? Even nice guys get the short end of the stick in this world. Plus, once again you seem to be assuming that I'm some spoiled kid who simply dislikes being grounded from watching TV, when that is not the case. You don't know anything about my life except what I have revealed in this blog, so I don't know where you're getting your conclusions from. Hell, even the friends I have in real life don't even know details about my life, they just know I don't like spending time home and prefer being outside doing anything else than going back to where I'm supposed to feel safest, my home.

Acting like a coward? You might see it that way, but I see it as manipulating the situation to my advantage. One is driven by emotions, the other by the desire to control. In order to avoid something I don't want to go through, I manipulated the situation and changed it into something much more desirable, which to what should appeal to your better side, I posted this...

I'm not making a habit of it though, this is the first and last time I plan on doing that.

... which is a goal I'll be keeping. I slipped this semester in my grades, but it wasn't anything horrible. My dad is just one of those people who thinks his world should be perfect, and seems to change in personality drastically whenever he notices something isn't perfect, and even with grades like C's and B's, he explodes like a ****ing nuke (bet you didn't even know that, did you?). I was busy prioritizing other things in life during this semester that took my time, and at the same time keeping my head up in my classes to get the best grade I could get with all of my plans and thoughts rolling around my head nonstop. Personally, for how busy I was this semester, I feel I did okay, but not everyone feels the same way... So, to avoid that which was going to be a stupid, pointless argument, I did what I did.

No. The deal is that you made a mistake, you can't take responsibility for it, you lied to your parents, AND you're in denial about how you should feel about yourself and your actions because you have your head too far up your ass. It's no wonder that conceited bastards can't see themselves, even when the truth comes to light.

I don't see myself as a person who's worth a lot. I'm a single person in the whole population of humanity, my life and death will probably not be recorded by anything except my birth and death certificates. I know how powerless I am, and how I will most likely fail to make differences in my society, but that does not mean that I can't control how I live my life.

Oh wow, your dad sounds worse than mine. My dad only did some minor misdemeanors like trying to strangle my mom and smashing my head in with an empty vodka bottle. But wow, your dad rages about stupid things. Your dad sounds real bad bro. He sounds like a real mother fucker.

I got 3 things to say:

1) Stop comparing your dad to mine in order to play the victim. We're different people who were raised in different ways, and we have different levels of tolerance on what we can and can't take.

2) Just as I have kept my personal life's details hidden, I ask you to do the same. To tell you the truth, I'm not surprised some people have gone through that stuff, I DO read the papers and watch the news. There's lots of different ways to suffer, but only one universal definition of suffering. Your past experiences and mine are different, but they both made us suffer. You think that because yours father was physically abusive, it immediately puts you in a worse situation than I've ever been? Stop kidding yourself, you're just proving to me how naive of a person you really are when you insult me and use that as your own basis. Do you know how many different ways parents can make their children suffer? Just to name a few, physical abuse, ****, spiritual abuse, mental abuse, brainwashing, imprisonment... Now, if you still think that "physical abuse" beats every other form of suffering a son can go through when living with his father, then sure, keep your argument up and strong! Self-gratification has never tasted so sweet, am I right?

3) The only thing you're accomplishing by putting yourself in a higher position than me is getting me to want to stop listening to you. You're not better than me, nor am I better than you. You haven't suffered worse than me nor have I suffered worse than you, from the details I've released in this blog. It would do you good to look at me as an equal and keep your own details to yourself as well, and to stop comparing your life with your assumptions of mine to make you seem like the worst one off of us two. What are you gaining out of this, besides my disrespect? As I stand, I made this blog to ask this...

So, what do you guys think about me manipulating them like that? Pretty much hacking the web page in a way that they won't figure out if its real or not? And me not telling them about my plans until the semester's right around the corner? Think it's only natural a guy would act that way to parents he dislikes, or should I give them once again the benefit of the doubt, and come out with the truth about my grades and blah blah

.. and you're turning it into a flamefest directed at me for a single lie I have done, and am declaring to the world to show that I am not afraid of acknowledging my sins, and so that I can get some insight from other people to make sure I never do anything of the sort ever again. What insight, besides "me being a ****-sucking ************" have you given me that has stuck into my mind for longer than the rest of your posts? Don't you think that it would be more effective to not be so condescending to someone who is asking for advice? Oh, forgive me good sir, I seem to have forgotten that insulting people is more effective than being nice.

Plus, I'm straight.

In seven days you're going to magically grow a pair and actually say what you want to say? Why can't you be a man right now and tell him how you really feel instead of holding it off to some contrived date that only indicates that you're seven days closer to death, senility, and stupidity.

More like "in seven days I will legally be able to take any action I desire, and my father will no longer be the person making decisions for me". In my opinion, 'the age of independency' is a much more fitting moment to talk to him about it, because it means that I'm at risk of leaving and not coming back. As a parent, he prides in his children even if he doesn't show it, even if he doesn't realize he causes harm to them by acting in some ways that common society does not approve. He will want to know what I have to say, what are my reasons for me wanting to leave, and if it's really worth it. But of course, you expected me to storm around the house, throwing a fit and crying, expecting my dad to shower me with cake and ice cream on my birthday after all this has happened (or something along that line of reasoning), weren't you? And you know how much I care about me aging and getting stupider? I care nothing. It is a completely normal part of life, and I will embrace it once my time comes. Chances are I'll get alzheimer's or die from cancer, as they both run in my dad's side of the family to top it all off.

Your dad gave you an education, he gives you GAS MONEY, he gives you a home. Some dads just leave their kids and give them nothing. And other dads... they give their kids a broken home, a damaged mom that needs to be taken care of by her own children, and the responsibility to forgive a father whose screwed them over in more ways then they could even count. If you're not even going to try to be a decent human being, then why should I treat you like a decent human being? I'm just telling you how you should feel about your decisions. You should feel bad about yourself.

Evil begets evil, huh? Telling me not to do something like this, then you saying you don't want to treat me like a human being, pretty much nulls everything you're trying to tell me.

If you're just replying to this blog to insult me, then I should let you know that I refuse to listen to people who talk to me the way you are doing now. If you can't even sympathize for others, how would you expect me to care about what you say? "**** you, you're an idiot who doesn't know right from wrong, no one in this world needs you", huh? I have no idea how that helps, and you should know better than to go into a blog that asks for advice, and insult the OP expecting it to be a "rude awakening" of sorts, when all you're really doing is pissing off the person and making them not want to acknowledge, or even listen, to what you're saying.


All you did was anger me, you didn't teach me anything. Congratulations, your goal has been fulfilled!

 

[Geist]

I have to say, hiding your grades like that was pretty slick. Ferris Bueller himself would approve.
We need more people with the balls to step up and make their own decisions.

Oh and Happy Bday in 6 days lol

 

[Sage JoWii]

Kewkky, outside the boards I don't really know you but I'd like to think we'd get along ok.

On the surface, to all these judgement *****es who have parents they get along with, this may seem like some ****ed up **** but since no one but you has a ****ing clue what your dad is like, or what your situation is like, they're just saying how they feel and ppl are entitled to their opinion.

I'ma go ahead and say, you do you. I also know, that while your parents are gonna be there over your shoulder trying to help, parents aren't always right. What was right for them, may not be right for you and that's something you have to figure out for yourself.

You get yours man; if you have to do, what others may coin, some 'shady' *** **** to ensure that you can carry out your plans how you want then do it.

Just know this though: You go live your life how you want if that's what you want but if you're not gonna let your parents help you or dictate **** for you then they may respect that but **** comes with that territory. If things don't work out, they may not be there to catch you. Everyone has to pick themselves up when they do **** alone.

Lying isn't some whiplash karma bull**** ready to bite you in the *** like some may think. Figure out who you love and respect in this world and make sure not to lie to them. If it's not your dad, that's ok. If it's a best friend, keep your words holy. The world isn't black and white. Lying to someone who doesn't NEED to know the truth is what you have to do sometimes and it's not something you should feel guilty about; it's a necessity.

 

[Kewkky]

Kewkky, outside the boards I don't really know you but I'd like to think we'd get along ok.

On the surface, to all these judgement *****es who have parents they get along with, this may seem like some ****ed up **** but since no one but you has a ****ing clue what your dad is like, or what your situation is like, they're just saying how they feel and ppl are entitled to their opinion.

I'ma go ahead and say, you do you. I also know, that while your parents are gonna be there over your shoulder trying to help, parents aren't always right. What was right for them, may not be right for you and that's something you have to figure out for yourself.

You get yours man; if you have to do, what others may coin, some 'shady' *** **** to ensure that you can carry out your plans how you want then do it.

Just know this though: You go live your life how you want if that's what you want but if you're not gonna let your parents help you or dictate **** for you then they may respect that but **** comes with that territory. If things don't work out, they may not be there to catch you. Everyone has to pick themselves up when they do **** alone.

Lying isn't some whiplash karma bull**** ready to bite you in the *** like some may think. Figure out who you love and respect in this world and make sure not to lie to them. If it's not your dad, that's ok. If it's a best friend, keep your words holy. The world isn't black and white. Lying to someone who doesn't NEED to know the truth is what you have to do sometimes and it's not something you should feel guilty about; it's a necessity.

Yeah, I know man... I already talked to someone through AIM about it (don't know if they wanna make their name public, so I'll hold it), and they said the same thing as you did: don't burn bridges. So, I'll see if I end up not telling him anything at all when I move out, or if it's a better idea to just let him know what's wrong with the family like I was planning to... I'm leaning more on "leaving quietly" now, though, but I still have to tell them I plan on spending the next year working full-time to make enough money to move out. That part of my plans I WANT to complete, it'll be better for me mentally knowing that I can lay down in the middle of a room and not worry about someone barging in and causing a whole fiesta of insults to fly around the house.

 

[X1-12]

I think perhaps you should just calmly tell both of your parents* that you plan to get a job and start living on your own, maybe even that you'll turn off your phone for a while so you can get some independence from them. I assume you have a place to stay at college? in which case I would stay there, and work as many hours as you can to get some money together so that you can rent your own apartment if you need. This will give you some space and a LOT of freedom, I also suggest, If you haven't already, create your own bank account, separate from your parents so you can save on your own. If you like, phone them sometimes, if you'd rather not then don't, but after a year, perhaps you should consider going back to see them, I think that if they see you have your own place to stay, a steady job and you are responsible, they may start to look on you in a new light.

Obviously all of this should be put to your judgement, If you think your parents wont take this well then don't do it, but remember, your parents need to remember that people grow up and change, its important that they can accept that. Also the Lying about grades, well whatever, it doesn't matter it'll be very soon that you can write it off as a childish mistake.



*perhaps after you are 21 (but not on the day, or the day after, they may assume you are drunk/hungover)

 

[PassWurD]

How should I feel about these decisions?

and some other personal stuff...

 

[JesiahTEG]

Um it's your life just do wtf you wanttt

 

[BBQTV]

i dont think you should tell them. you shoul hurry and get back in college

 

[Kingdom Come]

My reaction to Kewkky being butthurt

 

[#HBC | Acrostic]

I find it funny how I haven't disclosed a single personal secret or past event, and you now think that I'm just some angsty teenager who thinks he's the most unlucky guy on the planet.

I never stated that you're an angst filled teen. I even ran a ctrl+f search to see if I used the words angst or teen. I haven't used either. You have this bad habit of rehashing my statements and putting words in quotations that I've never used before. At first I thought that the quotations were used to indicate "emphasis" but it seems like it may be a habit for you to slander whoever has an opposing opinion to your own.

To be honest, I don't believe that I've made any assumptions about you outside of your own statements. Even though you state, "I haven't disclosed a single personal secret or past event" you still have given the people who read this blog plenty of information such as being a mathematics major, being twenty years old, having a birthday coming up, and deceiving your father because you don't like him.

I don't think that you believe you are the most unlucky guy on the planet. I believe that you think you are unlucky enough to deserve writing a blog on the internet. I also believe that you think you are unlucky enough to only deserve positive responses from complete strangers.

I think you should honestly realize that I'm not making any assumptions outside what you have told us. Unless what you have been telling us is lies, I don't believe that my opinions are based on faulty information. It is a common tactic to make your opponent seem stupid and irrational without providing a basis for such claims. If you substantiated these arguments with quotations and explained your interpretation behind my comments, then I would be content and apologize. But when it comes to baseless speculation about so-called speculation attacks, then I have a desire to point out that this is hypocritical to a certain extent.

Reason is, there's people I know in real life who visit this web page, and there are details of my life I'd rather keep to myself. If you're going to be THAT naive as to believe what you think is what happened without even a bit of proof, then I don't think I have to put up with you. But just to keep you humored...

I appreciate the fact that you are responding to my post. Even though I came off harsh in the beginning, it is because I live in a broken home and I try to do everything to keep my parents from fighting with each other. I understand the fact that you want to keep certain matters private. But the fact is that I have no way of knowing what those points are if you never tell me. Therefore, I can only base my opinions off the information you have given me. Again, if I made a baseless self-centered claim then please reference a quotation and tell me what I did wrong. Again you must understand that I have my opinions, but please don't smear them by stating they are baseless when I've tried to address the issue you presented. Again, thank you for posting up a detail response.

There's a big difference between living with people 24 hours a day for 21 years, and seeing teacher's faces for 1-3 hours 4 days a week/being around your boss 8 hours 4-5 days a week.

Good point. Then again, you don't really live at home 24 hours a day. The last job I worked involved a lot of communication with my co-workers and my boss at all times of the day. I was literally plagued with voicemails every time I would check my phone. In addition, I lived off-campus and didn't have to deal with my parents. So the situation was kind of flipped for me.

"No matter how much you grow, you'll never be bigger than your parents?" What do you think you are, saying stupid stuff like that? Are you possibly hinting that my parents are saints and have never done such things in their lives? We're all human, we all make decisions based on what each of us thinks is right. And guess what? I, knowing every single detail of my current situation, arrived at the conclusion that my decision was the best one.

I don't understand how it's stupid. I agree that everyone makes their own decisions, good and bad. But parents are still the people who took some amount of time to raise you and nurture you from birth. If someone had abusive parents and had no guardian-figures to raise them, then I apologize for the comment I made. I think it's important to acknowledge the good things that your parents have done before you start knocking them down for their mistakes.

You made a decision and you thought it was the best. I disagreed, I think that telling the truth was the better choice from the information you presented. You made a decision to post up a blog on the internet and ask for opinions from other people. I voice my response and answered the questions that you posted.

And I know it won't have a happy ending. Truth be told, my parents won't have enough influence in the rest of my life to really matter at all. My dad left his house after he finished college because he had everything paid for by his father, then he never went back, not even to visit. Are you telling me that it's impossible to live a life away from my family? Well, hell, guess I'd better not live out of my country, huh?

I never said that it's impossible to live a life away from your family. It's sad that your dad left and never saw his parents. If you want to get away from your parents, then that's fine. I just think it's pathetic if you leave them without telling them the truth. If you told them the truth and broke up on bad terms, then at least you left them with an accurate impression of who you really are and not some lie that isn't true.

I could report your post for flaming, but I won't just because I'm enjoying crushing you right now.

I'm happy that you're enjoying have a discussion with me. If you reported me then I would think that you couldn't handle honest criticism from someone with an honest opinion. I'm glad that you enjoy sticking up for yourself instead of hiding behind the rules.

You must be a very naive person to think that all problems can be solved by being a nice little boy.

Being honest has nothing to do with being nice or being a little child. I know that problems are made worse when people are honest. But I still think that things need to get worse before they can get better. Lying is just covering gashes and boils with a band-aid. Cavities don't go away if we use whitener on them. Sometimes you need to drill them out so that the bacteria doesn't spread to adjacent teeth. I'm going to continue this into my next post.

But guess what? Even nice guys get the short end of the stick in this world.

Again I know that honesty can get you in trouble. If I lied, I would still have my server operations job and consequently wouldn't have time to waste talking to someone I would most likely ignore or try to beat up in real life. But I can't sympathize with someone who has told me they are a liar and don't express remorse. I've lived my life in an honest fashion and is something that I continue to believe in regardless of how much trouble it gets me into. My beliefs oppose your own and that's what got me angry. I know the world screws over people, but that doesn't mean that I have an obligation to respect and sympathize with you because you became the type of person who screwed over his/her own parents due to their gullibility in this instance.

Plus, once again you seem to be assuming that I'm some spoiled kid who simply dislikes being grounded from watching TV, when that is not the case.

I never said that you were a spoiled kid. I never mentioned you being grounded nor did I talk about having childish hobbies. You're making assumptions about me making assumptions which is a bad habit because you're trying to make me look bad over something that I'm not doing.

You don't know anything about my life except what I have revealed in this blog, so I don't know where you're getting your conclusions from. Hell, even the friends I have in real life don't even know details about my life, they just know I don't like spending time home and prefer being outside doing anything else than going back to where I'm supposed to feel safest, my home.

Of course. I don't know you except what you have told us. I get my conclusions from what you have written. I don't know how many times we are going to go over this. You can't expect me to know about your personal life or respect a part of you that I don't know about. I live in a broken home with a depressed mom and a dad who have fought almost every time they see each other. Lots of kids live in broken homes and hate their parents. Everyone keeps their own box of secrets too. But you can't expect other people to treat you differently based on information you don't give them. That's irrational.

Acting like a coward? You might see it that way, but I see it as manipulating the situation to my advantage. One is driven by emotions, the other by the desire to control.

As someone who is contemplating psychology, you should know that there are several emotions that are connected to control: ambition, fear, and so forth. Even behaviorist have begun to acknowledge that an emotional-psychotherapeutic approach is useful in administering therapy and forming an accurate DSM-IV profile.

In order to avoid something I don't want to go through, I manipulated the situation and changed it into something much more desirable, which to what should appeal to your better side, I posted this...... which is a goal I'll be keeping.

Correct me if I'm wrong, but you didn't want to go through the emotional problems of dealing with your parents. Thus you avoided it by telling a lie and tried to make it plausible. I think that trying to work around the truth is pretty cowardly, especially when it comes down to parents. I really don't understand how being a manipulator really changes anything. It seems like your dad manipulated you into being a liar when you couldn't handle the standards he imposed upon you.

I guess I'm just envious of you because I don't have complete control over my life. When I commute from home, I get caught in six-car pile-ups and lane back-ups due to mistakes made by some idiot on the road. When I get my grades from school, I don't control how my papers get graded or how I'm evaluated. When I get back home and my mom is depressed, I can't control the fact that she doesn't want to cook or clean the house. I simply just do my part and fill in where other people cannot. If you have control over your whole life then that's awesome. I guess I wasn't born to be a manipulator.

I slipped this semester in my grades, but it wasn't anything horrible. My dad is just one of those people who thinks his world should be perfect, and seems to change in personality drastically whenever he notices something isn't perfect, and even with grades like C's and B's, he explodes like a ****ing nuke (bet you didn't even know that, did you?).

I didn't know about that because you never told me. But I can understand why your dad is angry when he is financing your college education and expects to see you perform as a student. I also understand that mathematics is a hard major. I dropped in on an abstract algebra and a linear algebra course. It is really tough stuff, especially since I'm not mathematically inclined.

The thing is those are your grades and your future. Your dad cares enough about you in order to look at those scores and scream at you so that you can do better next time. Your dad wasn't the one who got those grades, it was you. Him exploding is a consequential action to the mistakes that you make. If you didn't make those mistakes then he wouldn't be angry. You chose to be a math major which is difficult. If you chose an easier major then you wouldn't make as many mistakes and then wouldn't make your dad angry.

I was busy prioritizing other things in life during this semester that took my time, and at the same time keeping my head up in my classes to get the best grade I could get with all of my plans and thoughts rolling around my head nonstop. Personally, for how busy I was this semester, I feel I did okay, but not everyone feels the same way... So, to avoid that which was going to be a stupid, pointless argument, I did what I did.

As with most college students balancing life, money, and academics is the typical juggling act. You prioritized other things and hence your grade suffered. Your grade suffered and hence you should have dealt with an angry dad. But you didn't want to face that ramification and chose to hide away the mistake and reap in all the benefits of performing a juggling act. You win some, you lose some. Being unable to handle your own short-comings when the results roll-in... seems like cowardice.

I don't see myself as a person who's worth a lot. I'm a single person in the whole population of humanity, my life and death will probably not be recorded by anything except my birth and death certificates. I know how powerless I am, and how I will most likely fail to make differences in my society, but that does not mean that I can't control how I live my life.

Well I guess I got the wrong impression when you were talking about the results from an IQ test. It's good that you believe you can control your own life. I wish I could say the same thing.

I got 3 things to say: 1) Stop comparing your dad to mine in order to play the victim. We're different people who were raised in different ways, and we have different levels of tolerance on what we can and can't take.

I never wanted to be a victim. It seems like everyone was kissing your ass in this thread. If I wanted be pitied I would suck up to you and then tell a little about myself so I could get a nice response back. Or I would write down, "you're so cool man, you know java!"

If you don't want to compare dads, then don't tell me about your dad and how he treats you. It is extremely convenient for you to lay out one-sided rules that benefit you and expect the other side to comply. You're right, we were grown in different scenarios. If you can't stomach the fact that there are dads worse than yours, then you should leave the thread. You don't own smashboards, you don't own this thread, you don't own my comments as much as you insist that you are in control of your whole life.

2) Just as I have kept my personal life's details hidden, I ask you to do the same. To tell you the truth, I'm not surprised some people have gone through that stuff, I DO read the papers and watch the news.

It's not like it's a tragedy. I personally prefer reading the New York Times than local domestic violence cases. It's good to know that you read newspapers and watch television to know what my family life is like.

There's lots of different ways to suffer, but only one universal definition of suffering.

Oh I didn't know that. Philosophy is pretty interesting.

Your past experiences and mine are different, but they both made us suffer. You think that because yours father was physically abusive, it immediately puts you in a worse situation than I've ever been? Stop kidding yourself, you're just proving to me how naive of a person you really are when you insult me and use that as your own basis. Do you know how many different ways parents can make their children suffer? Just to name a few, physical abuse, ****, spiritual abuse, mental abuse, brainwashing, imprisonment... Now, if you still think that "physical abuse" beats every other form of suffering a son can go through when living with his father, then sure, keep your argument up and strong! Self-gratification has never tasted so sweet, am I right?

Yeah. It really hurts when you're feeding it all back to me. I realize how much of a hypocrite I am for trying to compare my dad to your dad when I never wanted to talk about my dad in the first place. I am an extremely naive person. When I see someone involving personal information, then I figure I'll sneak a little of mine too to make them realize that sharing personal information is bad. I just never realized that it would all backfire on me and blow up in my face. I understand your argument very well. Physical abuse is nowhere close to what other kids are suffering through and I learned a lot from you who went through physical abuse, ****, spiritual abuse, mental abuse, brainwashing, and imprisonment himself. I never knew you went through such torture and I truly appreciate that you went through this personal trial in order to teach me a lesson on humility.

3) The only thing you're accomplishing by putting yourself in a higher position than me is getting me to want to stop listening to you.

You don't know how upset I was when you stopped listening to me.

You're not better than me, nor am I better than you. You haven't suffered worse than me nor have I suffered worse than you, from the details I've released in this blog. It would do you good to look at me as an equal and keep your own details to yourself as well, and to stop comparing your life with your assumptions of mine to make you seem like the worst one off of us two.

I never said I was better than you. In this case that you presented in your blog, I believe I have had worse days. But you might have worse days as well. Again I'm sorry for all the assumptions I've made and I will definitely learn by your example in the future.

What are you gaining out of this, besides my disrespect? As I stand, I made this blog to ask this..... and you're turning it into a flamefest directed at me for a single lie I have done, and am declaring to the world to show that I am not afraid of acknowledging my sins, and so that I can get some insight from other people to make sure I never do anything of the sort ever again.

I gave you input.

What insight, besides "me being a ****-sucking ************" have you given me that has stuck into my mind for longer than the rest of your posts?

You didn't like it.

Don't you think that it would be more effective to not be so condescending to someone who is asking for advice? Oh, forgive me good sir, I seem to have forgotten that insulting people is more effective than being nice.

Yeah insulting people doesn't work. You approach the situation a lot better.

Plus, I'm straight. More like "in seven days I will legally be able to take any action I desire, and my father will no longer be the person making decisions for me". In my opinion, 'the age of independency' is a much more fitting moment to talk to him about it, because it means that I'm at risk of leaving and not coming back.

I disagree. I think the age is more like 18 but I don't have a "coined phrase" to substantiate my point so I'll agree with the argument you present in yours.

As a parent, he prides in his children even if he doesn't show it, even if he doesn't realize he causes harm to them by acting in some ways that common society does not approve. He will want to know what I have to say, what are my reasons for me wanting to leave, and if it's really worth it.

That's good. Your dad sounds like a cool guy.

But of course, you expected me to storm around the house, throwing a fit and crying, expecting my dad to shower me with cake and ice cream on my birthday after all this has happened (or something along that line of reasoning), weren't you?

Your assumption is spot on. I'm absolutely guilty. I apologize dude that is exactly what I wanted you to do.

And you know how much I care about me aging and getting stupider? I care nothing. It is a completely normal part of life, and I will embrace it once my time comes. Chances are I'll get alzheimer's or die from cancer, as they both run in my dad's side of the family to top it all off.

That's cool.

Evil begets evil, huh? Telling me not to do something like this, then you saying you don't want to treat me like a human being, pretty much nulls everything you're trying to tell me.

Nah. It's not evil. You're just expressing how you feel inside. I'm just responding to your comments and expressing how I feel inside. It's a pure form of expression. At least it is a lot better then making up your own censorship rules and then breaking all of them yourself. Now that is silly.

If you're just replying to this blog to insult me, then I should let you know that I refuse to listen to people who talk to me the way you are doing now.

Okay. But I enjoy it when you talk back to me even though I'm rude, crass, and blunt. That's just who I am and I treat everyone that way. If you want to ignore me then that's fine. I'm not going to call you a sissy or anything. It's your choice man.

If you can't even sympathize for others, how would you expect me to care about what you say? "**** you, you're an idiot who doesn't know right from wrong, no one in this world needs you", huh? I have no idea how that helps, and you should know better than to go into a blog that asks for advice, and insult the OP expecting it to be a "rude awakening" of sorts, when all you're really doing is pissing off the person and making them not want to acknowledge, or even listen, to what you're saying.

Well I didn't want to lie to you and tell you that you're awesome. Then I would be insincere. , I care more about my own comments more than anyone elses, because in my world I'm more important than you are. When you respond to my comments, I'm most likely just using you to have a discussion of self-amusement. You don't really matter to me, I'm just using you in order to derive some form of self-enjoyment. If your comments became boring, then I would just ignore you because you are no longer amusing and aren't worth my time.

It's funny how you talk about how much the world sucks. Yet you are trying to make me feel bad for not feeling pity for you. Sympathy is a nice word to dress up pity. You want me to pity you, make me look down at the poor soul who is suffering on the street corner and feed him a bread crumb because he looks so **** pathetic. Usually people want empathy, but end up being pitied because no one understands their problems. I don't understand your problems and you don't even want to tell me or anyone about the full extent of this situation. I can't empathize with you because I'm not you and nobody else can be you either. You're lonely and no one on this forum board will ever understand what you're going through. They'll just give you nice words of encouragement or talk to you on the phone.

A year from now I'm not going to care about you or what happens to your dad. If you decide to kill yourself, I won't even know about it. In fact, most of the people here who responded to you won't even remember who you are a couple of years down the road. Most of the people in this thread ignore each others comments even though this is supposed to be a cohesive community. People don't really care about each other on the internet or really care about each other period. Most people who give you nice comments are just saying it with no meaning. When they are doing homework or taking a test they don't care about you, they don't pray about you, you're just meaningless until they see your blog on the internet.

All you did was anger me, you didn't teach me anything. Congratulations, your goal has been fulfilled!

Assumptions are bad.

 

[Man of Popsicle]

File > Page Source.
I'm sure you can figure it out.

 

[Kingdom Come]

My reaction to Kewkky being butthurt

This
10chars

 

[Kewkky]

big wall of text, which I will answer altogether

Look, I made a blog simple asking people to give me, according to their opinions, if i should tell the truth or not, feel bad or not, or believe if it was the best choice according to everyone else. I was looking for input, just input... You came into the thread, acted very aggressively, got me aggressive in return (as well as derailed me, a simple answer to the questions would not have derailed me at all, which is what I wanted), and look at our 5 posts now.

I don't know if you understand what I wanted from the thread, but according to your post, it appears as if you think all I wanted was people agreeing with me. No, it's not what I wanted. The reason why I reply to them in a nice tone is because they reply to me in a nice way. You replied to me in an aggressive way, so I replied to you in an aggressive way. You even randomly called me a "****-sucking ************", I believe that was uncalled for, I didn't even call you anything. Plus, if you're going into a blog that asks for advice, and let your personal feelings affect how you express your advice (you said you were angry in your previous post), you should know that your point won't come across clearly... And to let you know, it didn't. I was derailed, you made me want to reply to you in an angry tone about how you're being unnecessarily angry. The situation I described in the OP didn't even call for insults or condescending attitudes.

One last thing before I come back from off-topic... You brought up your dad and family problems which appeared to me to be a "check out my life, I dare you to tell me your life is worse, don't complain if you don't have it as bad as me"... I didn't even ask for people to tell me how their lives roll, all I wanted was an answer for my questions, which were in the last paragraph in the OP. And even though I feel like I shouldn't apologize to someone who I personally feel started it, I'm still gonna apologize because being angry at an angry person won't make them happier, and I should've realized that. So, I'm sorry. To finish this off, I'm just gonna say that your last post was much better to reply to (it wasn't angry and didn't set off my short attention span like the previous two did), but I still decided on replying to you this way because it was way too big.


Don't know what else to say now, since your last post was clearer than your previous two. Just to point it out, I DO plan on telling him the truth, but I'll have to get ready to deal with him yet again, so it might take a while.