I want to tell every resident that they are officially *****es who suck.
That's right I mean you.
This is nuclear freaking crisis mode. The nuclear holocaust of all that is fail and suck. And that nuclear holocaust is us, the abysmal shell of what was the greatest competitive scene in Melee in our glory days.
Issue # 1: Camaraderie
Vist and I are awesome, we have the biggest ****s in the world and we're sexy. If we boned your girlfriend and got her pregnant and you could raise one of our gorgeous illegitimate children it'd be like upgrading from a toyota to a sexy *** mercedez with jessica alba giving you head. Have you seen cyrain?! The guys like a model on a romantic novel cover. We need to start being friends, who hang out and do awesome stuff. This has to become a community again, we have the people and dynamic, we just don't have the love.
We need to start hanging out with each other outside of smash. The south has a great strong community, and look how they've developed! Our number one issue right now should be going to CHILL in DC and richmond. Let's find things to do, lets have cook outs and shiz, bro it up. Laijin and I are going to get cars soon, and if we can get some financial support.
Issue 2 Positive Attitude: How many of our MD/VA own cheered for us at pound 5? No one. We all suck at supporting and developing prospects. I had to play Mattdotzeb to get out of my second round people and Chivalruse, my neighbor and friend, comes up and says "I don't know who's going to win this one!"
WHAT THE HELL MAN! I'M YOUR FRIEND! ENCOURAGE ME! how much support does PP get from the south! and I can't even get positive support from my own friend. This is shameful and stupid. We need to cheer for each other, get each other hyped. We need to support cyrain, our best player who's a few steps away from being tops, at nationals instead of acting like *****es. From now on, Md/VA over out of state blindly. This is myself included, we need to always say we **** and everyone else sucks, even if we know it's not true.
And I mean Travis and Winston and Wenbo and all you silent losers who don't cheer.
Myself included.
This game is fun, we need to have a good time, have a ball.
We need to develop redd into a ****** beast who pillaged booty holes and smokes a cigarette afterwards saying "And now you know douche." Everyone helps everyone else get BETTER now. No more putting people down, no more competitiveness internally, have fun, have at it, have sex with hot chicks! If you see talent, you welcome them and develop them.
We need to be positive, and stop bickering and stop worrying about money.
Issue 3 Legistic Support: We need to start worrying about money!
Laijin and I are getting cars soon, and if richmond comes up we should make things cheap for them because of gas prices. But why should Richmond come up when we suck at everything because we're *****es?! We need to activate awesome mode!
Issue 4 Big Wenz is too black: Eat a **** NiQQ@!
Issue 5 Activity: Lets play some smash, son. Plank is leaving ( i believe) we need more hollowed ground to play smash in, my house is in baltimore and is too far, but we need someone besides sypher who can help us. And we need to treat syphers like hollowed ground, throw him some money so it's not so hard to throw tournaments and clean up after ourselves. I don't know who can help, but we gotta figure out something.
I don't know if we can ever get the brawl players back, because they seem pretty sold on sticking to the easy game, but we can definitely have more fun than we are having now.