Hello all! I recently wrote a rap / poem for a far more toxic site than I care to admit I go to every now and then, (okay fine it's GameFAQs), and I actually ended up being surprised at how well it turned out. It was just a random Smash Cypher post, but I figured I'd share because it was fun writing and for 30 minutes it didn't turn out bad at all. I updated it a little just because I found some better words / typos.
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busts out of their home in Spiral Mountain
[Kazooie verse]
Bam! Banjo, it's finally our chance to shine,
Takin' all the gatekeeper's cheese, with a lot of bit of whine!
Got the tears of DLC deniers flowing like a damn water fountain,
While preparing for our time to Smash from up here on Spiral Mountain!
[Banjo verse]
But wait, Kazooie, you're not being very nice,
Lots of characters have dreamed of this very moment once or twice.
I will say though pal, for us it's finally sunny weather,
Now lets get out there, fluff some fur, and shake a red tail feather.
[Kazooie]
Coming in hot, it's me, Kazooie, everyone's favorite breegull,
I'm sassy, smart, fast, and if you think you can beat me, LOL.
I'm not here to sing or dance, not waltz or serenade,
But you better pay attention, cuz' here comes an ass grenade.
This is no contest of speed, though if it were I'd win the race,
Right now I'm focused more on delivering this egg into your face.
Lookin' kinda high down there up on that red percent,
Let's do it, Banjo! Breegull Bash! Yup, and there they went!
[Banjo]
Now that's a little violent, Kazooie, but I guess we do what we must,
That Breegull Bash we just performed just turned Mario into dust!
It's time for me to pull my weight, learned that from our friend the mole,
I might not be big like Donkey Kong, but check out my forward roll.
For a "cereal mascot" bear and bird, richer than milk, more like sour cream,
Screw it Kazooie, here we go, let's show the cast that we're the Dream!
We'll bash and smash and get the cash and like Survivor we'll outlast,
Let's hear a big ole' GUH HUH, down throw, now you better mash!
[Banjo & Kazooie, alternating, starting with Banjo]
This is for the jinjos, Mumbo, and my sister Tooty!
This is for the ass kicking we handed Grunty's booty!
We've collected all the notes and jiggies and saved each and every friend,
For a simpleton brown bear, you know, let's stay together 'till the end.
We might not have had an adventure lately, plenty of time to rest,
But for lots of gamers in the 90's, we're the f***ing best.
"Banjo and Kazooie WIN!" the announcer soon will sing,
Let's use the last of our golden feathers, now pal, Wonder Wing!
Banjo and Kazooie, win!
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Anyway, hope everyone is doing well! I'd love to see Banjo and Kazooie make a come back outside of Smash, with all the products and licensed goods the last couple years, I feel it's possible, but I'm not expecting anything.