Trans-Phobia in the smash community.

[Vixen]

This is a very real problem within the community. To me, this is an important community and was an integral part of my coming out and transitioning. Feeling uncomfortable within the main community I participate is a very real problem for me, and other trandgenders within the community.

Specifically, I would like to call to attention posts, and comments made by Lovage and Westballz during the Kings of Cali tournament series.

Before KoC1, I changed my tag, and began to present and live as female. This was to symbolize my growing as a person and leaving behind the person I used to be. KoC was to be my first OOS tournament as a new person/ Lovage and Westballs were openly and publicly offensive towards me and my transition, outright refusing to refer to me by my preferred gender and name.

KoC 2 and 3, Lovage made thinly veiled trans-phobic remarks towards Corigames, a player in attendance, basically denying that she's a woman/implying she's less of a woman than a ciswoman.

During Apex 2013 several players referred to me using male pronouns, or outright calling me "******" and other offensive comments while outwardly presenting as female and insisting I be called by my preferred gender.

This thread is to call this practice in to question, and make it more aware to the community at large. Smash community, be the better community. Trans-phobia is very rampant in other competitive communities, in fact, moreso in the fgc than smash. Let's strive to eliminate this and set an example for others. We have a very active LBGT community, with many of our community figureheads being of alternate sexualities. Why can't alternative gender identity and expression be as accepted as sexuality?

 

[-Ran]

I'd like to think we're a liberal community, but as a middle-class white male, I can't really place myself in your shoes. From what you've stated, it's more of an issue of a select few individuals being a catalyst, which is more telling about them, than our community. Our community is very open from what I've seen to the point of accepting known doers of dubious deeds freely. In Louisiana, we had at least one open transitioning player, and I believe it was smooth sailing for her.

Most players people do not understand the horrific mental anguish that is typically associated with being trans, before or even during the process of converting to your proper gender. Just delving into the societal pressures is enough to make many individuals crack, and that usually pales into comparison to what hormone treatments can do to brain chemistry and emotional responses. People do not understand the trauma involved with the process, or all the horrible memories associated with times when you weren't fully yourself.

Good luck.

 

[l will find peace]

I think everyone knows that lovage is a moron and first class virgin. so should you

This was to symbolize my growing as a person and leaving behind the person I used to be

You should probably "grow as a person" some more. mature people dont post things like this. you would have gone to the root of the problem if there was one

also youre confusing "trans-phobia" with immaturity.

 

[Archangel]

^ why do I feel like this is an alt account or something???

Anyway, I'll be honest when it comes to competitive gaming I don't see why sexuality makes a difference at all. It's the same as say, competitive combat like wrestling or something where you have to make physical contact. Then I could understand if some people were concerned about the sexuality of others but there isn't any physical contact being made aside from a few high fives and fist bumps. So, If we are showing up to compete for the title of best in the venue on that day why does someone's sexuality matter at all? It should be as important as the color of someone's shoes or the hair(meaning not important at all).

Our game has undergone so many changes from it's early days to this very moment and it continues to change. Especially in it's meta where we've seen golden and dark ages for many players and characters alike. We've seen the same changes occur when it comes to Melee's place among other games. Going from basements and church to the major venues, back to the depths from which it came and now it's come roaring back onto the world stage.

What we have yet to see is our community dissipate it's the phobias. Part of it could have something to do with our confrontational base. Country vs Country, state vs state, region vs region, coast vs coast, north vs south, east vs west. I think some people forget that we are all on the same side at the end of the day. We love this game, want share our love for this game and it's unique brand of competitive play with people who see it the way we do. Melee symbolizes the universe we live in. Out of all the random chaotic we have this artistically brilliant game that is not perfect but we seek to perfect it in our own way. Much like ourselves in our everyday lives. If this is forgotten/never realized within our community perhaps it deserves to one day die out just like us, just like the universe.

 

[ZelDan]

A person's sexuality shouldn't matter, but sadly for some people it just does. Alot of it it has to do with people just being unable to place themselves in their shoes, or just not really understanding transsexuals in general. I'm sure when I first learned of the concept I was weirded out and failed to understand it too, but as I heard more stories from transpeople, both online and IRL, I started to realize how difficult and stressful being trans can be. I couldn't even imagine how tough it is to feel like you aren't really you and having to hide this fact for years in fear of backlash.

It is unfortunate some people cannot move past the "weirded out" phase and move on to the understanding phase. It'd make life a hell of alot easier for everyone.

 

[The Real Gamer]

It is unfortunate some people cannot move past the "weirded out" phase and move on to the understanding phase. It'd make life a hell of alot easier for everyone.

Unfortunately our culture has been naturally conditioned to fear what we don't understand, but lucky our society is slowly moving towards becoming more accepting/understanding of gays, transgenders, bisexuals, etc.

 

[infiniteV115]

From what you've stated, it's more of an issue of a select few individuals being a catalyst, which is more telling about them, than our community.

This.

Also maybe you shouldn't take offense to every instance of being called a ****** (not saying you're already doing that, but rather saying keep an eye out for it). Obviously I wouldn't know cause I wasn't there, and you'd probably have a better idea of the intent behind it, but I wouldn't be surprised if (at least some) people who were using that word didn't know it was a derogatory term. Hell, I didn't know it was a derogatory term until I read this thread; I thought it was just short for transgender/transsexual in the same way that 'jew' is short for 'jewish person' (and in the same way that not everybody who uses the word 'jew' is doing it with the intent of derogation). Maybe a bunch of people who referred to you as a ****** were thinking the same thing. It's not the most commonly used term anyway.

Though if everybody but me already knew that ****** was a derogatory term, then pardon my ignorance I guess. At least I learned something.

 

[Vixen]

The thread is a lot of things. I could also bring up the sexism if you guys would like too. Or the blatant disrespect on national-level streams by high-priority commentators. It was short sighted of me to target specifically the trans-phobia, but given that there was a transgender in attendance that sparked the disrespectful words on stream, it's what I targeted.

This isn't about me personally being offended by individuals. I'm only using experiences I've had as example. The sexism goes faaaaaar deeper. This is bringing awareness to problems within the community.

 

[infiniteV115]

There's nothing inherently wrong with making a thread that specifically seeks to address trans-phobia (it'd definitely be more fruitful than attempting to make a thread that addresses everything wrong with the smash community) but I don't think trans-phobia in and of itself is prevalent enough in the smash community (could easily be wrong on this, I don't travel too much, am only really part of the Brawl community and on top of all of that I'm from Canada where we're pretty open minded about stuff like this, so I don't really deal with this stuff and thus am probably fairly biased) for this to be considered a community problem. Really it's about addressing the bad apples in the community.

I'm aware it's not about you personally getting offended but rather bringing these bad apples to light.

 

[Papa+Stone]

You were born with balls right? Use them, all this whining and crying and pro liberalism has become a trend around here lately and its not healthy. This is coming from someone who is gay as a whistle and yet refuses the gay culture of crying to obama and web communities instead of solving your own problems and having balls. My friend you are simply confused, if you were a girl you would have been born that way babe (words from the gospel of the lord and savior to my people lady gaga)

 

[Vixen]

You have absolutely no understanding of transsexualism. Please refrain from ever commenting about them again without proper research.

 

[SunJester]

You were born with balls right? Use them, all this whining and crying and pro liberalism has become a trend around here lately and its not healthy. This is coming from someone who is gay as a whistle and yet refuses the gay culture of crying to obama and web communities instead of solving your own problems and having balls. My friend you are simply confused, if you were a girl you would have been born that way babe (words from the gospel of the lord and savior to my people lady gaga)

You're a ****. Also you are massively misunderstanding the premise of "Born This Way," to a laughable extent.


Two things, Mizuki.

1. Frequently people will use the wrong pronoun because of confusion. Trans people are not very common and some people will mess up the pronoun accidentally or simply not know any better. Its important to just correct them and be courteous about it. If they then refuse to do that, feel free to either talk to a T.O. or simply call them a **** and leave it at that.

2. As a community we should not be prejudiced. The more we let people get away with using derogatory statements regarding other players, the faster this community will become a joke, and die. No more slurs, no more derogatory statements, and we should have very little tolerance for such things. Then we can progress not only as a community, but as people.

 

[Vixen]

You're a ****. Also you are massively misunderstanding the premise of "Born This Way," to a laughable extent.


Two things, Mizuki.

1. Frequently people will use the wrong pronoun because of confusion. Trans people are not very common and some people will mess up the pronoun accidentally or simply not know any better. Its important to just correct them and be courteous about it. If they then refuse to do that, feel free to either talk to a T.O. or simply call them a **** and leave it at that.

It's more than just the disrespect or ignorance towards transgenders. There's other large issues such as rampant sexism, and disrespect in a professional environment (huge national streams)

2. As a community we should not be prejudiced. The more we let people get away with using derogatory statements regarding other players, the faster this community will become a joke, and die. No more slurs, no more derogatory statements, and we should have very little tolerance for such things. Then we can progress not only as a community, but as people.

I'm trying to bring this to light. Historically, scenes like WCG/Arena Shooters died because of the shadiness behind the scene. Disrespect, sexism, abuse, etc became the norm, and when the players and community at large became researched and targeted by the media, they got shut down.

 

[killazys]

Man, this stuff really sucks, but like, the few people that are going to be ***** about it are probably going to be ***** about it anyway.

Unless the entire community moves as a whole to be VERY staunchly against that kind of discrimination (which I really think it should lol) then some people will still sit on their high horse and say ****.

The question becomes... how do you propose you near-unanimously move the highly fragmented Melee community? (FTR I'm on your side but this is the real problem I see.)

 

[Fish&Herbs19]

I'm very accepting of the LGBT community, but there are alot of instances in which I wouldn't know whether I'm offending a person or not. I normally call transgendered persons by the sex that they transitioned into and such so I am more aware than most. Normally the community is pretty accepting, so sorry to hear about your troubles.

 

[WestBallz]

What the actual ****??? When the **** did i ever disrespect any transgender?? I have never in my life made a remark the would intentionally offend a transgender. Just because i called you rubyiris means i have transgender phobia? I will admit i was a **** back in the day and didnt care to refer u by ur new name but that doesnt mean i go around talking **** about ******* or make rude remarks. I dont know where you heard that from or what but im really pissed off that someone would spread a lie like that about me. People who know me know i would never say anything rude to someone that doesn't deserve it.

 

[l will find peace]

LAWL

And that's rubyiris???? OH GOD the memories of the world's dumbest person crying for attention on the fox/gen boards. see not much has changed in 5 years.

smashboards is hilarious

 

[Cassio]

Annnnnd suddenly knowing this is/was Rubyiris everything makes sense. Move along folks, nothing to see here~

 

[Vixen]

What the actual ****??? When the **** did i ever disrespect any transgender?? I have never in my life made a remark the would intentionally offend a transgender. Just because i called you rubyiris means i have transgender phobia? I will admit i was a **** back in the day and didnt care to refer u by ur new name but that doesnt mean i go around talking **** about ******* or make rude remarks. I dont know where you heard that from or what but im really pissed off that someone would spread a lie like that about me. People who know me know i would never say anything rude to someone that doesn't deserve it.

How wasn't it? Changing my legal name, and my tag was a huge deal to me. I changed names to symbolize that I'm not that person anymore. What justification do you have that I am somehow more or less deserving of your politeness than anyone else? I have never slighted you, yet you were an asshole to me.

Annnnnd suddenly knowing this is/was Rubyiris everything makes sense. Move along folks, nothing to see here~

People change. Do you have any idea what level of transformation of a person I've gone through in over a year?

LAWL

And that's rubyiris???? OH GOD the memories of the world's dumbest person crying for attention on the fox/gen boards. see not much has changed in 5 years.

smashboards is hilarious

I won't deny who I was, but that isn't who I am now, nor will it ever be again. I'm not here whining, complaining, or trying to cause drama within the community. This is a legitimate issue. Ball is in your court.

Burden of proof is on the rest of smashboards at this point.

 

[Jim Morrison]

There's a certain point where you have to understand people don't know how much of an impact certain things will have. Especially something that seems as trivial as a name change.

Literally no person would care if a normal person changed their name, so don't expect the general population to respect your feelings regarding a name.
You made it look like Westballz and Lovage outright called you ****** or other disrespectful **** in your face. You gotta understand that no harm is intended if people are irritated with your personality, instead of your transgenderism.

 

[kys]

It's good to understand that some people are going to be uncomfortable with transgenderism. The way each individual deals with it is different: some will stay silent, some may use derogatory slurs, etc. Transgenderism is not a common thing; it's safe to assume people do not deal with it on a regular basis. So there should be some understanding on the other side that this will take some getting used to. "Accepting" goes both ways. I don't know if this point was brought up yet, but give people some slack, yeah?

There's a strong movement in our culture to accept the LBGT community. Honestly, I don't think this is the place to do it. It comes off as you seeking attention for specific issues (with Lovage and Westballz) and seeking drama. I don't know if that's your true intention or not (I don't think it is), I'm just telling you how it looks.

 

[WestBallz]

How wasn't it? Changing my legal name, and my tag was a huge deal to me. I changed names to symbolize that I'm not that person anymore. What justification do you have that I am somehow more or less deserving of your politeness than anyone else? I have never slighted you, yet you were an ******* to me.

Nobody gives a **** about you thats why nobody gives a **** to call you by the name u want to be called. The only reason i didnt refer you to your new name is because i personally didnt like any of your posts on smashboards and the way you type things came off as cocky when you were no where near good at this game. Your a **** trying to start drama when i havent said or done anything to u in over a year. Get over yourself and your "transformation". If i see you in person i wont hesitate to ****ing **** talk you. Get the **** outa here u low life drama seeking ****.

 

[l will find peace]

this is a legitimate issue for you as a person. you dont like yourself, and thats what creating the insecurity that is causing all this.

this is not a community issue. you are not a special snowflake that everyone else needs to admire. when mature people have problems, they recognize them and they handle them. you are not even acknowledging what your problems are, for whatever reason (probably cause you dont understand how ridiculous that other people who are responsible and good at life see this post as).

pls stop.

and i wish i could come off as less of a jerk saying this but all of it is important and youll probably just skim or ignore it anyway... lol

 

[Annex]

I prefer to **** chicks doggystyle.

...did you want to know that? Because I'm tired as hell of hearing about what everybody else prefers doing to/with their genitals.
It's ****ing gross. Keep that **** to yourself.

And if someone's doing something you don't like, deal with them the same way you (hopefully) deal with all your other problems. That "hopefully" not involving ******** about it on a public forum for sympathy likes.

 

[Dwreck]

I remember hearing gay used as a derogatory term by one of the announcers this weekend. I know it sucks at the least to be oppressed but try and remember these people are here to play smash cause they like playing video games. Not because they're smart and caring individuals

Until smash becomes apart of something big like MLG again there probably won't be any major changes in the styles of commentary

 

[trash?]

westballz this isn't a money match callout, you god damn baby, this is someone asking you to have a conversation, which you are seemingly horrendous at

 

[Vixen]

There's a certain point where you have to understand people don't know how much of an impact certain things will have. Especially something that seems as trivial as a name change.

Literally no person would care if a normal person changed their name, so don't expect the general population to respect your feelings regarding a name.
You made it look like Westballz and Lovage outright called you ****** or other disrespectful **** in your face. You gotta understand that no harm is intended if people are irritated with your personality, instead of your transgenderism.

If the thread didn't go down I would have gone through again and quoted the exact posts. Maybe Weston didn't, but I distinctly remember Lovage doing so, and if he didn't at KoC1, it doesn't change the fact that he DID make a remark, live, on the KoC3 stream between the lull of Doubles and the start of Singles bracket on Sunday. At that point, it wasn't about me. It wasn't about being offended, or anything else. That sort of comment on a national level stream just bothered me. Especially the constant "OH GIMR ISN'T HERE TIME TO START BEING UNPROFESSIONAL" attitude he continued to have despite A. being a high profile streamer, and B. being told beforehand not to do that kind of ****.

Also for that, I'm sorry for accusing you Weston. Didn't make your comments any less offensive.

It's good to understand that some people are going to be uncomfortable with transgenderism. The way each individual deals with it is different: some will stay silent, some may use derogatory slurs, etc. Transgenderism is not a common thing; it's safe to assume people do not deal with it on a regular basis. So there should be some understanding on the other side that this will take some getting used to. "Accepting" goes both ways. I don't know if this point was brought up yet, but give people some slack, yeah?

There's a strong movement in our culture to accept the LBGT community. Honestly, I don't think this is the place to do it. It comes off as you seeking attention for specific issues (with Lovage and Westballz) and seeking drama. I don't know if that's your true intention or not (I don't think it is), I'm just telling you how it looks.

I'm not looking for retribution for isolated events. All I am doing is citing situations that have either happened to me personally, or I have observed myself in the past year related to the topic at hand. I'm not trying to start a witch hunt.

Nobody gives a **** about you thats why nobody gives a **** to call you by the name u want to be called. The only reason i didnt refer you to your new name is because i personally didnt like any of your posts on smashboards and the way you type things came off as cocky when you were no where near good at this game. Your a **** trying to start drama when i havent said or done anything to u in over a year. Get over yourself and your "transformation". If i see you in person i wont hesitate to ****ing **** talk you. Get the **** outa here u low life drama seeking ****.

I'm not trying to start "drama" with anyone. I'm bringing up legitimate issues within the community. If you WOULD like, I could bring up the blatant disrespectful attitude a vast majority of the community has, or the rampant sexism our figureheads in the community continue to exhibit, etc. I'm sorry if you're upset by my using you as an example. While you were, and continue to be disrespectful to me as a person, it's my fault for misremembering the situation, and I apologize for that.

this is a legitimate issue for you as a person. you dont like yourself, and thats what creating the insecurity that is causing all this.

this is not a community issue. you are not a special snowflake that everyone else needs to admire. when mature people have problems, they recognize them and they handle them. you are not even acknowledging what your problems are, for whatever reason (probably cause you dont understand how ridiculous that other people who are responsible and good at life see this post as).

pls stop.

and i wish i could come off as less of a jerk saying this but all of it is important and youll probably just skim or ignore it anyway... lol

I like who I am now, thank you every much. I have my problems, but they're all very well managed.

This IS a community issue. This and many more I plan to address in time.

Please elaborate how I'm less responsible, or less good at life than anyone else on the thread. You're making baseless claims.

I remember hearing gay used as a derogatory term by one of the announcers this weekend. I know it sucks at the least to be oppressed but try and remember these people are here to play smash cause they like playing video games. Not because they're smart and caring individuals

Until smash becomes apart of something big like MLG again there probably won't be any major changes in the styles of commentary

Actually a few threads on MIoM, and SWF over the past few month have significantly lowered the net usage of "Gay," as a catch-all term for "Lame" but it still exists. Bringing awareness does create change.

I love smash. It's my favorite game, and, despite the negative aspects of the community, I still enjoy being a part of it. I want to help encourage the community to be more mature, and professional as a whole.

westballz this isn't a money match callout, you god damn baby, this is someone asking you to have a conversation, which you are seemingly horrendous at

Please try to keep this civil.

 

[TaFoKiNtS]

Actually, it seems like you're the type of person that looks to go out of your way to find offense. 99% of the stream could go perfectly, but if someone ACCIDENTALLY calls you a "he", you'd go ape**** over it. Get over yourself, seriously.

Also, I don't really like that you're projecting that we're transphobic over 1-2 comments. Making mountains out of molehills.

Like don't get me wrong, transphobia is bad. Most of the community would agree (hopefully). I'd fight for your rights, but you're not making a good name for transgendered people.

 

[Vixen]

Actually, it seems like you're the type of person that looks to go out of your way to find offense. 99% of the stream could go perfectly, but if someone ACCIDENTALLY calls you a "he", you'd go ape**** over it. Get over yourself, seriously.

Also, I don't really like that you're projecting that we're transphobic over 1-2 comments. Making mountains out of molehills.

I COULD have let this go, like I did many other situations, including many I haven't even begun to address, but it being on a large stream just screamed out to me. I actually ENJOY Lovage's commentary, when he's being professional about it. :/

 

[TaFoKiNtS]

Then why not just PM him? You're making it sound like Prog, D1, HMW, Scar are all culprits of transphobia /rollseyes

You're equating people calling you a "he" as being transphobic. If you're looking to be offended everywhere you go, then you'll never be happy. I accidentally called you a "he" once and you went ballistic on me. Was it cause I was trying to be insensitive? Not at all, but you react as such. Not everyone is out to get transgendered people

I also acknowledge there's probably worse things that have been done other than misusing pronouns, but yea..

 

[l will find peace]

I like who I am now, thank you every much. I have my problems, but they're all very well managed.

nope. evidence = everything you post

Please elaborate how I'm less responsible, or less good at life than anyone else on the thread. You're making baseless claims.

because of... everything you post.

you havent even made a legitimate claim. the stream vod is right there on twitch. you already backtracked once after wes replied to you, and then said that you dont remember exactly what was said later on. if theres evidence then bring it. right now its just some little boy/girl/whatever whining with ZERO evidence of anything

further quotes:
"burden of proof is on smashboards"
"the ball is in your court"
"i already cited"

i dont think you get how any of this is supposed to work. no one important takes you seriously anymore so you can do whatever you want though

 

[Vixen]

Then why not just PM him? You're making it sound like Prog, D1, HMW, Scar are all culprits of transphobia /rollseyes

You're equating people calling you a "he" as being transphobic. If you're looking to be offended everywhere you go, then you'll never be happy. I accidentally called you a "he" once and you went ballistic on me. Was it cause I was trying to be insensitive? Not at all, but you react as such. Not everyone is out to get transgendered people

I also acknowledge there's probably worse things that have been done other than misusing pronouns, but yea..

I'm not looking to be offended everywhere I go. That makes absolutely no sense. What do you know that I don't to continue to come up with these bizarre claims about my person?

 

[TaFoKiNtS]

Maybe you don't think that, but I'm sure 9/10 people who have seen your smashboards and other posts would infer based on your actions would agree with me.

 

[Isatis]

As a trans woman, there is transphobia in the community. I've had some smashers calling me a "wanna-be drag queen" behind my back. I've lost friends. I'm still scared showing up to a Xanadu in a skirt.

However, I think I've said this before both on Reddit and the MioM, but tournament organizers really need to outline that harassment and bullying is not acceptable... in any situation, whether homophobic, transphobic, etc. There needs to be real consequences to this such as disqualification and/or ejection from the venue for this as well. I don't see this and, not mentioning anyone in particular, but I have brought up concerns to people running events and it was met with "well, it was friendly trashtalking, no big deal."

As for commentary, I was watching KoC3 and didn't catch the joke Lovage said, but I'll be talking to the rest of VGBC soon on it and some other things.

(Sorry, wrote this really quick)

 

[Krynxe]

Unfortunately, it's not really a community thing, it's completely societal. This kind of discrimination is simply going to continue existing and it bears no relevance to a specific person, clique or community. That's why Isatis provides the best solution, and that's maintaining a professional environment and preventing that kind of behavior from being either broadcasted or simply perpetuated within the venue. Many people are fans of the two players you outlined, and seeing how we are easily-influenced human beings, it wouldn't be a surprise to see people pick up on their ideals from what was seen on a livestream. Thus, I think it's fair to say that allowing this kind of behavior to pass is loosely tied its own prosperity, making this a genuine issue that needs to be addressed and taken more seriously than it has been. This topic should not stop at trans-phobia, as well, we need to outline everything - including sexism, racism, and homophobia - and try to maintain a healthy environment for everyone.

As a side note, California players have a history of being more aggressive, rude, or mocking than most other areas. And more often than naught, they really don't have terribly malicious intentions, it's just the kind of interaction that they're used to. Being a Pac West player myself, I see this all the time since the different areas around here act so distinct and out-of-region people often look really lost or awkward/uncomfortable. To be clear, I'm not trying to justify their behavior, I'm simply putting the topic on the table: different regions have different behaviors and that should be considered, but outright discrimination and bullying should never be tolerated.

 

[TaFoKiNtS]

To not misconstrue what I've written previously, l am not being a hater and I do want to create a great environment for everyone. (I used to TO alot and still help out with events). That being said, I feel that in the future if something were to come up, people need to talk to the person/parties directly.This type of conflict resolution is something applicable to issues beyond the LGBT issues that may come up. I've been trying to search through the archives, and I'm finding it really hard to try to infer where anti-transgender comments were made. I would have to dig real deep and assume a lot.

In the future if this happens:
Random Smasher: "Insert *comment* about anti-trans"

Simply saying, "Hey I'm actually offended by that. Could you refrain from using that phrase?"

Most of the time, they should be understanding.

I remember when I said something along the lines of

"That's really g**""
Mikey Lenetia actually told me he was offended and I respectfully curtailed my language on behalf of his request.

Likewise, you should do the same in the future.

This is how we progress society, Crystal

 

[Isatis]

It's not as easy as that. I did the same with someone at a tournament a year ago and got a rude "freedom of speech, I can say what I want" response.

 

[TaFoKiNtS]

And there are the less progressive ones that you just shake your head at.

 

[Komotonoto]

The fact that you are giving ****s about what ppl say to you is the problem. They can call you whatever they want, it is up to you to hang out with them or be close to them. Only when the problem becomes physical is when you should care. People are ignorant, and you just have to accept that. If threats are made, speak up and search for help. End of story.

 

[Eisen]

Pardon me if I misinterpreted, but it kind of seems like most of the resistance in this thread consists of "B-but what if we're respectful and nice to somebody for nothing? What if they just learn to deal with it instead?" which is unfortunate.

I agree that tourneys need to be friendly, inviting environments. I don't know what people are making a fuss about, but is it really that big of a deal to just be like, "oh, I apologize if I offended you, I didn't mean to; I don't understand why/how I offended you. Could you educate me?" and be mature about this? Or, even if you don't want to know why you offend someone, just respect their wishes as best as possible. Nobody expects you to remember 100% of the time so long as you actually TRY to care about the other people.

As for the people who are defending themselves against accusations, you really fail to make a presentable counterargument when your posts consist of a bunch of namecalling and swearing. Like really, you basically paint the targets on your own heads.

To the people complaining that it's "mountains out of molehills" and/or proposing the others just "deal with it", I don't see how that addresses the issue at hand or even provides a better alternative. Firstly the OP isn't making unsupported claims, nor loading their language with dramatic wording, or anything like that. They simply feel that it's an issue. If you don't, that's acceptable but the point of this thread is to get an actual conversation started as to how to deal with the issue addressed. Calling it out as trivial does absolutely nothing but show that you don't want to care and already have preconceptualized notions about what you want to believe instead of trying to understand the situation.

I mean, is there something wrong with being more accepting of others? Do people care so little about this community that they don't care if people are outright afraid to be themselves at tournaments? As has been said, is it really worth turning people away just because you think they should get over it?

To someone who's transgender, it's no different to purposefully disrespect their gender preference (notice I'm not talking about accidental cases) than referring to a "normal" guy as "her" and "she". What makes it worse is that trans acceptance and understanding is frankly rare in general and therefore the numbers at attendance at tourneys reflect that majority/minority balance.

I think it's also ridiculous that people are calling to attention the fact that the world in general is dumb so we should accept that. That's called apathy. It's basically like giving up and not giving a crap. Change comes when ideas are exchanged between people, not always because society/the government tells the people to think a certain way. Look at prohibition. Look at what kinds of controversial and now-illegal things (pot, online piracy) people do despite the laws set in place and the shame/fear the government/society hangs over their heads. The people have to demand the change first or the people above them will take it all away. OP here is trying to strike up conversation and actually discuss this maturely, yet half the responses fail to address the issue at all.

Smash events are meant to be civil, if I'm not mistaken. I don't see how it'd be any different to set in rules against trans-related discrimination than the rules (which I'm ASSUMING exist) regarding race, sex, etc-related antagonizing. Keep that in mind, guys.