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I've had enough trouble with my semi-local Smash scene to have to leave, but yeah in general smash is much better off than most communities in anything.i haven't been doing the whole "e-sports" thing for a long while. the only other game i've played on a competitive level is team fortress 2. i made the decision today to "retire" from tf2 for smash since the smash community seems so much nicer, and i find smash to be more fun than tf2.
I'm feeling very hopeless. I got rejected from two jobs I had interviews for which had a lot of promise. And the thing is as some of you may know I've been unable to get a job since my last seasonal one in 2012, and even got scammed in July with a "work from home" scam. But that's something else.
What makes it worse is the fact that if this keeps up, I'll eventually outlive my parents, and I'll have nowhere to go to. I'll be one of those hobos living under a bridge begging passersby for money. I had hoped to live a wonderful life, but it seems that I'm doomed for the opposite.
I for the most part blame myself and the choices I made during college. I knew I never shoulda gone to that social group; two of the girls I instantly bonded with there would leave me soon after and I'd just have more problems. I put my priorities in the wrong places by choosing trying to maintain friendships over studying, and it's too late to take any of it back.
This is the worst I've felt in a long time, worse than when those girls stopped being my friend or when I had to break up with a guy I was dating online (which thankfully I am still friends with him at least). I just feel so hopeless and I think I just might as well give up on everything.
And also -- I feel like I'm too busy for friends. In fact only one takes the time to call or Skype me every day, and I guess I feel jealous that no other friends do that? Is she being too clingy? I'm not sure anymore...but I'm being the opposite to other friends, and one has deleted me from Skype because I didn't contact her since her birthday. I feel like the worst friend ever. Especially since I think the reason some of my earlier friendships ended was ironically because I was the one being too clingy.
Worst, I basically put off a lot of things until the situation in my life improves. That includes talking to friends.
Tl;dr - I don't know how to friend.
I know how that feels...except maybe the hair part because I never really cared that much about it. I may have a balding crown...can't tell if it's balding or not.- Being unemployed kinda sucks. Being at home post-college like this really makes the efforts made to actually earn a degree seem futile. There are no art/graphic design jobs remotely close to where I live at currently, so until then I gotta shift through online applications for ****ty jobs I don't give a **** about until I have a stash to move. So it's a either be stuck at home and feel like a bum or go work at Burger King.... and still feel like a bum.
- My hair is thinning out badly. I was miserable for most if not all of my teenage years, but if there was one thing I liked about myself, it was my hair. It was thick, coarse, and I had felt for a long time it was a redeeming feature as far as my overall appearance was concerned. I got a haircut about three years ago because cornrows just wasn't my thing anymore, but a friend drew my attention to my balding crown soon afterwards and I was immediately devastated.
I struggle to be confident sometimes, and it's a ****ty feeling to look in a mirror and know your hair is gone before you're even 22. It can really be a detriment to your self-esteem. I really hate seeing guys my age or older sporting a full head of hair as if nothing's wrong yet I have to find ways to hide my head.
- I feel like I'm always alone. I've always been a reserved laid-back loner, but sometimes I feel like not having any real friends is keeping me from enjoying more out of life. Common things people enjoy like bowling, shopping at a mall, playing paintball, eating an expensive restaurant you've never tried before, etc. are infinitely more fun when you've got a good friend around but I don't have them. I'm just stuck by myself almost all the time, without the option of hitting someone up to chill. I never felt like I fit in with any group...like I'm just there by association but not an essential piece of the puzzle. People gave me a really hard time during middle school/high school, so that might contribute to how "cold" I can seem to others.
Even if I get to know someone, they'll most likely end up being a mere acquaintance and nothing more. I've met and got along with a few people in college who I felt a connection with, but nowadays I'm lucky if they answer a mere Facebook message.
Which brings me to the next thing that's been eating me...
- There was a girl in my department whose been on my mind every single day since I've left. She had a lot of qualities that I found very attractive once I had gotten to know her, and we were cool with one another. I told her how I felt about her right before I graduated, but she doesn't reciprocate the same feelings, sadly. The last time I spoke to her was maybe four months ago, because I'm not even sure which way I should even approach a conversation with her. Part of me wants to leave it alone.
It's been giving me a lot of pain because I feel like I may never see her again which is killing me because she has a pretty unique aura about her and she's a sweetheart to boot. There may be a chance I can see her before the year is out, but until then my insides still occasionally feel like someone punched a hole though my chest and forgot to pull their arm back out.
Just take two mirrors facing opposite of each other.I know how that feels...except maybe the hair part because I never really cared that much about it. I may have a balding crown...can't tell if it's balding or not.
I was actually dreading graduation day somewhere around junior year because I knew things were going to suck once I got back home. There's not enough opportunity for jobs like it was 15+ years ago, and making it where you wanna be resides on who you know moreso than how good you are.Graduated a little over a year ago. Still working part time at a retail store. Not what I imagined post-college life to be. Most of my female friends I could have considered dating during college live nowhere near me since I moved back home, so I can't say I have any luck in that area either.
Yeah, just tell her that you thought she looked like another girl in one of your classes. It happens.And to think that my life wasn't already stressfu (I know that this may not exactly fit into this thread, but it's making me unhappy and l need some help).
There was some girl walking to class and I was behind her a bit. I thought that she looked like another girl in one of my classes, so I glanced at her for about 2 seconds to see if she was. But then she turned around and saw me staring at her. Now I think that she thinks that I was checking her out or something like that. She sits at my lunch table though talks to the other people (she's not my friend). I tried to tell her ("Hey I need to tell you some...") but then her friend came and I said never mind.
Does anyone think that I should tell her what happened, just so she can think that I'm not some sort of pervert?
Pretty similar, but my issue is mostly with people. I had a great summer job with lots of great people, physical, not remotely retail, that started 3 hours later (and I'd be okay with 4 or 5 AM myself.)My new job is absolutely killing me. It's a 4am shift, and it's all difficult physical work. For some that may not be a big deal, but I am not a physically inclined person, not by a long shot. I can only get about halfway through my shift before I really start hurting, and it makes the whole rest of the time complete agony. By the time I get home I'm limping and can barely hold my arms up, and I only get a short amount of time before I have to go to bed so I can get up at 3 and do it all again. It's completely consumed me and I absolutely hate it. I would legitimately kill a man for a desk job right now.
Yeah, I pretty much work at Burger King now, the entire industry is pretty similar. Soul-crushing stuff, it really is, and we're very expendable. You might learn new skills and how to talk to people though. It sounds like corporate-speak, but it's really not and you could learn that in any job or recreational activity where you regularly have to deal with a lot of people or a lot of stress.- Being unemployed kinda sucks. Being at home post-college like this really makes the efforts made to actually earn a degree seem futile. There are no art/graphic design jobs remotely close to where I live at currently, so until then I gotta shift through online applications for ****ty jobs I don't give a **** about until I have a stash to move. So it's a either be stuck at home and feel like a bum or go work at Burger King.... and still feel like a bum.
I didn't take exams seriously until I got a fast food job, now I feel your pain. Be strong.Exams have completely destroyed my sleeping routine and I'm trying desperately to not fall asleep in class.