![Luigi :4luigi: :4luigi:](data:image/gif;base64,R0lGODlhAQABAIAAAAAAAP///yH5BAEAAAAALAAAAAABAAEAAAIBRAA7)
"Ey Mario! We're gonna be in a movie!"
![Mario :4mario: :4mario:](data:image/gif;base64,R0lGODlhAQABAIAAAAAAAP///yH5BAEAAAAALAAAAAABAAEAAAIBRAA7)
"Luigi, don't you see? They're whorin' us out for money! We didn't get any say in this!"
![Luigi :4luigi: :4luigi:](data:image/gif;base64,R0lGODlhAQABAIAAAAAAAP///yH5BAEAAAAALAAAAAABAAEAAAIBRAA7)
"I dunno Mario! I've always wanted to be on the big screen!"
![Mario :4mario: :4mario:](data:image/gif;base64,R0lGODlhAQABAIAAAAAAAP///yH5BAEAAAAALAAAAAABAAEAAAIBRAA7)
"We already were, Luigi. And it was terrible."
Don't think I'mma let this attack on the Super Mario Bros movie slip by.
The movie's core problem was it's desire to turn a trippy kid friendly fantasy adventure into a dark Blade Runner style dystopian story, but within that new (misguided) context, the movie actually goes to great lengths to try and justify and adapt a lot of the weirdest elements of the game.
Mario can jump really, really high? They justify it in the movie by giving him those jet boots. The Princess looks completely human, despite being a native to the Mushroom Kingdom? That's what the convergent evolution thing was there for. The super mushrooms that power up Mario become the ever present fungus that repeatedly helps get Mario out of trouble, and the late film revelation that the fungus is actually the former King transformed is taken right from the plot of Mario 3, which is all about saving kings that have been transformed into different creatures. And of course, we can't forget the best joke in the movie, where we find out Mario is actually Mario and Luigi's last name, to justify the title of the game itself.
And my personal favorite moment in the movie, the part that I think is the single most clever adaptation of a ridiculous video game concept to film, the frozen pipe slide. Think about how absurd it is that Mario and Luigi travel through pipes. How do they just magically fly through them? The movie could have taken the easy route and just included a scene where they walk through some pipes to sneak into the castle or something, but no, the movie fully embraces the warp pipe and creates a fun action scene where Mario freezes a giant pipe, hops on a mattress and slides down it like a slide. I don't care who you are, that's fun.
I wouldn't go so far as to call this movie 'great', but I also think the people who call it terrible are way out of line. The movie is, above all else, fun, and that's what makes it good.