Really that's key, being able to take any insults and remarks in stride.
I'm sure the upcoming weeks won't be as ****ty as you anticipate, in fact, I expect them to go much better than you think.
I can't remember if I told my first coming out story, but here goes.
Once upon a time in a land far far away known as Illinois, there was a 5-year old boy standing in his laundry room...for some reason that said dboy can't remember, and a thought crossed his mind.
"Could a gay man and a gay woman get together? Like would it work the same?"
And that's when little Andydark wondered if he was different. Not different as in gay, but different as in an idealist. Fastforward to just before my Eighth grade graduation ceremony, by this time I'd already realized I was gay. HUZZAH! I was standing in a circle with my closest friends, we were laughing and having a good time and such. For some reason, Melee became relevant to what we were talking about, and I made a reference. Suddenly the laughter ceased, and was replaced with a "God, shut the hell up." "Seriously, you're so ****ed annoying." I attempted to laugh it off, however it kept coming... "We're serious. Shut. Up." "Honestly, I regret talking to you that one day." My laughing stopped too, I tried to maintain my level-head with a "...What?"
Then, the guy in the group who was my best friend, and someone that I was attracted smiled his smile, and I felt reassured.
Only to add, "It's true, none of us ever really liked you to begin with."
I buckled. I went from outcast to outcast of the outcasts, and I never felt so alone in my life, I headed for a window sill and sat down. I got angry. I got upset. I cried. And, worst of all, I blamed myself. I began listing off what my flaws might be...but none of them really stuck.
Then it hit me. "It's because I'm gay." Somewhere inside my rational side thought "But there's no way they could have known." and it begged and pleaded for someone to stop this self-destructive railroad. And people tried. Faculty members tried to figure out why I was upset, but I remained silent. Someone from the more popular clique asked too, but I told her to "stop being such a nosy *****" while the side that still liked myself was silenced.
Silence became my friend. I spent my freshman year of highschool.... Silent. Cold. Condescending. Sarcastic. Insulting. People were shocked to hear me speak. The side I locked up occasionally reached out...And at one point, I did start to feel better once I got with some new friends about halfway through the year...
And then I overheard them talking. "Do we REALLY have to invite Andrew?" I expected this though. I immediately lashed out at everyone in that group, I had to strike directly first, I had to protect myself. I then went back to how I was...Cold, silent, and somewhat cruel now. My kinder side was no where to be found. My hope was basically gone, I realize in retrospect that this was a stupid reaction, but I turned to suicide at that point, which is what my Grandfather did. Fortunately strange things would randomly sabotage me, Inability to tie knots, pets startling me making me drop things, four examples where I had to quickly gather things up and hide them.
On homecoming week of my sophomroe year, my sister, who was my ride, left me behind so she could smoke pot with her friends. As I sat on a garbage can outside thinking about how my life sucked, (a past time of mine at the time) A freshman girl was walking by, she had really short pink hair with spikes. She stopped suddenly to stare at me. I blinked, and she said "You know, you have the capacity to be obnoxious." And I simply replied, as coldly as I could "...Excuse me?" And she then sat on the dilapidated bench next to me and said "Not in the bad way of course." I replied again, coldly attempting to repel her, with some semi-witty quip. She then told me I looked like a dirty mexican. I replied that she looked like a manly ****. She laughed and said she got that a lot.
My kinder side tried its hand at freedom again, and asked for her name. "Elizabeth. You're Andrew, Right? The freshman talk about how you're sort of a psycho nazi freak." She replied, smiling plain as day. "Wanna get something from the vending machines? It's hot out here..."
And we did. We got back out and spent time talking about everything. Our schools, our families, where we lived, the ladybugs, the weird cross, the tree, how stupid it was that I got yelled at for sitting on a three hundred dollar garbage can... I had felt sincerely happy for the first time in ages.
For the remainder of the year, I hardly saw her, but just passing her in the hall way and occasionally hanging ou t with her after school kept me going. People even began to notice...
When my Junior year rolled around, I passed by sophomore hall, and saw her. Her hair was her natural color and she had her hair in a pony tail. I stopped and greeted her. And our conversations picked up like old. I even came early on the day that started late, solely to hang out with her more (she lived a half hour away, and I still lacked a license as did she) Four weeks after school started, while walking with her to fourth hour, I randomly decided to ask her a question...
"Could I Tell you something?"
"Ha ha, sure, why not?"
"Heh...well...I'm gay."
"Oh? That's great!"
"What?"
"It's great! I had two uncles who were gay..."
And conversation flowed completely uninterrupted again. By the end of first semester, I had been introduced to her group of friends, and by the end of the third quarter, I felt I belonged well enough to let them know.
It wasn't a critical detail of myself, so I never got many questions. I never had any issues, there was the one guy who became terrified of me, but that's a story for another time.
As a random fun note: In my senior year, Elizabeth and I dated for a month. That's how close we are, I wondered if it would work... To this day I still wonder.
But basically, the point of my ramble is to be primarily uplifting and provide a quick warm and fuzzy feeling. Plus, as a homosexual, talking about myself is my primary concern next to fabulous drapes and buttsecks according to stereotypes.
Fun fact 2: The first circle of friends? All wound up being highschool dropouts, with the guy I found attractive overdosing on cocaine. Apparently I was the logical support of hte group and without me they just sort of ****ed themselves.
