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History's Baddest Bad***?

Zook

Zook

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I've been pondering this question for a few weeks now. Currently, I think that Rasputin may win the title. Taking advantage of the czarina's (right word?) belief that he was a healer to essentially take over Russia while banging every chick in Moscow was pretty rugged. Plus he had a great beard.

What do you guys think?
 
M

Mith_

Smash Champion
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inb4 Leonidas.
Leonidas
w00t post 1900.
i got banned from the pr for this lol wth
 
D

Deleted member

Guest
urdailywater said:
No seriously. It was Moses. He made the ocean split in half, that's seriously manly and amazing
Click to expand...
Ah yes, the whole Red / Reed sea debacle.

Churchill 'cause he had political meetings in his bath tub.
 
SuperRacoon

SuperRacoon

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It's a Secret to Everybody!
Cracked.com has an article about 5 real life soldiers who make Rambo look like a total wimp. Those who are familiar with cracked.com pretty much know that they are total experts one exactly what is bad*** and what isn't.

http://www.cracked.com/article_17019_5-real-life-soldiers-who-make-rambo-look-like-*****.html

To those who aren't, you will instantly become tougher just for reading the article that the link above takes you to. (ok, the link above turns out to be broken due to the profanity filter, i'm not exactly sure how "p u s s y" is profane, all this time I thought it had to do with little domesticated cats...)
 
cman

cman

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Joined
May 17, 2008
Messages
593
Patinator said:
The answer here is obvious.

Gheb_01.

...In all seriousness, it depends on what the/your definition of "bad-***" is.
Click to expand...
Pat, because no one else could suck Gheb so long and so hard. Congratulations man!

Relax! I'm kidding!
~~~~~

Definitely Taft. How many other men have gotten stuck in the White House bath tup? That's right. None. Point proven.
 
Geist

Geist

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Andrew Jackson isn't badass because of the trail of tears.
He's badass because someone tried to assassinate him and instead was beaten within an inch of his life with a cane.
He's also badass because he died in a duel.


Theodore Roosevelt also gave a speech with a bleeding bullet wound. So that's pretty cool.
 
slave1

slave1

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come on sucker lick my battery
moses, chuck noris,

that one guy, who was that good in that one war. who killed that insane amount of men without even being touched, then when he was run through, he still killed that ridiculous amount of people with nothing more than a ball point pen and a laser pointer with a magnifying glass. he also was apart of bringing down that one king that we all know about with nothing more than a grain of sand and a g string he stole from his gf's house. thats not all... he also freed that one nation with a rock and two sticks, then saving a baby seal stuck in a soda can holder. founded a save the sharks, snakes, and other cool animals of the world foundation. then he broke the flashes ankle so he wasn't so broken and overpowered. so in the day the flash turns evil superman has a chance to beat him.

of yeah he also saved a kitten from a tree while taking on Anderson Silva in a one on one cage fight... and winning
 
Spire

Spire

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Yeah, yeah, cause Moses really split the sea in two. There is no proof whatsoever. How about we stick to historical figures that have enough proof and credit (other than some lunatic scriptures from ancient, mistranslated texts) to support their feats, eh?

I'm going to have to go with Jack Burton Edward Teach (aka Blackbeard). Or Ghengis Khan.
 
M.K

M.K

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What about Harriet Tubman? Strong black woman running through the forest picking up her ghetto fabulous friends and running from the honkies.
Sounds like a bad *** life to me.

They don't censor bad *** when put together? Ok, changing it...
 
Tom

Tom

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Does it matter how far away they lived? Or how long, long ago they lived?

Because the answer is Lando Calrissian.
 
Xsyven

Xsyven

And how!
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No one's said Jesus yet? Hot ****. Sins of the world + crucifixion, man. And he just took that.
 
Tom

Tom

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Exodus 2:11-12 [NIV]:

One day, after Moses had grown up, he went out to where his own people were and watched them at their hard labor. He saw an Egyptian beating a Hebrew, one of his own people. Glancing this way and that and seeing no one, he killed the Egyptian and hid him in the sand.

 
M

MBreeto

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lol, people really need to read the bible before they start basing their knowledge of moses off of Disney's "The Prince of Egypt" ;)
 
CR4SH

CR4SH

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Got to be rasputin.

Look that dude up.

Poisoned, shot 4 times and gutted, he nearly strangled a man to death. They managed to knock him down with clubs, wrapped him up and threw him into an icy river. Dude died of drowning trying to claw his way through the ice.

WTF.

Edit: Lol I just NOW read the OP. Yes dude, we're on the same page. Rasputin is the baddest badass that ever badded an ***.
 
Stos

Stos

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I'll have to go with Sidartha(Buddha's real name and he started Buddhism) Muhammad(person who started Islam) and Malcom X.
 
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