Best Friends

[Grandeza]

I know everyone thinks they have the best friends and of course so do I. I have a bunch of best friends. One I've known for 7 years now since 3rd grade, one since 5th, and the other two since 6th. I love all of them and really treat them as siblings. Of course I'm comfortable sharing anything with them.

 

[darkfox15]

I don´t have best friends!!!!, just friends, but I think that a best friend must be someone who u can tell him/her some things about you, maybe a problem...

 

[Merkuri]

It's good to hear you have a couple best friends; I stated in the previous page what I consider a best friend, but I just realized that I don't really have any, lol. I mean, I have plenty of friends, just not best friends.

Give it time, I'm sure one will form.

I said before that I didn't think My ex-girlfriend and I had the mental connection that my previous best friend and I had, but that seems to be changing. Without me realizing it she has matured a lot and gotten really smart, she's not the same kid she used to be.

@Darkfox: So then you have no one to confide in? That sucks man.

 

[Merkuri]

I said before that I didn't think My ex-girlfriend and I had the mental connection that my previous best friend and I had, but that seems to be changing. Without me realizing it she has matured a lot and gotten really smart, she's not the same kid she used to be.

So people I don't think it's a good idea to try and be friends with your ex. Too many feelings involved.

My ex and I fooled around a little bit while I was back home, but decided not to stick with each other. I thought the recent time we spent together made us closer, but I just found out that she had a boyfriend during this time. It's not even two weeks since she and I were together and she's in a committed relationship with this guy. And what makes this worse is that she's done **** like this before, I really thought she had matured out of this.

I need to distance myself from her now, and I've gone back to feeling like I don't have a best friend anymore . I just wanted to vent I guess.

 

[RATED]

So people I don't think it's a good idea to try and be friends with your ex. Too many feelings involved.

edit : I PM you the post. I 'll tell you the reason.

 

[Omis]

My best friend and I have never been closer than after we had sex.
I highly recommend it.

 

[Merkuri]

My best friend and I have never been closer than after we had sex.
I highly recommend it.

How long have you two been best friends since then? And are you two just friends?

If you're trolling then please do not continue. I am trying to keep this a sincere topic.

@Rated: Thanks for the advice and the info. It's nice that you shared it with me.

 

[Merkuri]

I think I'm over my former best friend now. It turns out that she hardly knows me. I posted a joke on her Facebook wall and she thought I was being jealous and vindictive towards her. She spent so much time projecting what she thought of me into a conceptualization that she didn't really get to know who I am, or she has simply forgotten and replaced it with what she wants to see.

It's weird because I know her so well. The good side of all this though is that I know longer feel as if I lost something since we started distancing ourselves from each other.

 

[Omis]

How long have you two been best friends since then? And are you two just friends?

If you're trolling then please do not continue. I am trying to keep this a sincere topic.

@Rated: Thanks for the advice and the info. It's nice that you shared it with me.

The friend is a chick and Im a dude so firstly its no homo or anything like that.
Weve been mad best friends for about five years. She, no lie, understands me much better than I do. On day we were talking about sex and we were worried that wed be filled with regret if we lost it to someone who we didnt love all the way or didnt respect us. One thing led to another and we decided that we should have sex so that the memory would be with someone we could always trust and feel secure with. Never kissed or anything before that, havent kissed afterwards, and neither of us have felt any desire to do it with each other again. Both of us are very glad that we did though.

 

[hemlock]

This is an awesome thread and a lot of these descriptions of friendship have been really nice. I don't know if I really have one true best friend, but after reading some of your posts, I'm sure I'd like to make some friends from this board!

 

[Merkuri]

The friend is a chick and Im a dude so firstly its no homo or anything like that.
Weve been mad best friends for about five years. She, no lie, understands me much better than I do. On day we were talking about sex and we were worried that wed be filled with regret if we lost it to someone who we didnt love all the way or didnt respect us. One thing led to another and we decided that we should have sex so that the memory would be with someone we could always trust and feel secure with. Never kissed or anything before that, havent kissed afterwards, and neither of us have felt any desire to do it with each other again. Both of us are very glad that we did though.

Aw that's nice. It's a unique situation and I don't think it work for a lot of other people if thier circumstance differs too much from yours but I'm happy worked out for you.

This is an awesome thread and a lot of these descriptions of friendship have been really nice. I don't know if I really have one true best friend, but after reading some of your posts, I'm sure I'd like to make some friends from this board!

Yeah I'm happy I made it and I hope it stays alive for a while. I'd like everyone to know that any new feelings or thoughts they have about thier best friends are welcomed to be post here.

 

[MASAHIROx]

my best friends girlfriend hates me

cuz me and my best friend are so close lol

she jealous

 

[Moon of the Strawberries]

I've known my best friend for 18 years. We first met when we were babies and we were friends ever since. We always hung out and played video games together. I could always trust him with anything, and we'd even just have these nice conversations talking about life and such. Although, last year there was a huge, confusing misunderstanding and our friendship died. Lately we attempted to patch things up but it's still not better, that closeness we had will never return. It's a shame since growing up we each didnn't have many friends, making one of the only constants in our life gone.

Since then i've been very careful with my friends, and to this day I doubt my so called best friends now. Terrible to think that one moment in time can make you re-think everything in your life, but it happens.

 

[MASAHIROx]

what happened???

 

[Merkuri]

Yeah I don't mean to pry Moon of the Strawberries but I'm really interested in what happened as well. I've lost a lot of close friends so I think I know the feeling.

 

[DTP]

I've known my best friend for 18 years. We first met when we were babies and we were friends ever since. We always hung out and played video games together. I could always trust him with anything, and we'd even just have these nice conversations talking about life and such. Although, last year there was a huge, confusing misunderstanding and our friendship died. Lately we attempted to patch things up but it's still not better, that closeness we had will never return. It's a shame since growing up we each didnn't have many friends, making one of the only constants in our life gone.

Since then i've been very careful with my friends, and to this day I doubt my so called best friends now. Terrible to think that one moment in time can make you re-think everything in your life, but it happens.

That's awful.....

I have a best friend that I known since we were babies as well. Another one I've known since Grade 1, and one I've known since Grade 4 (I'm 20 now btw).
I don't know if I could handle losing any of them as they are all my best friends. It'd kill me inside if any one of us were suddenly on bad terms and decided to go our separate ways......

 

[Moon of the Strawberries]

Yeah I don't mean to pry Moon of the Strawberries but I'm really interested in what happened as well. I've lost a lot of close friends so I think I know the feeling.

Honestly to this day i'm not entierly sure what happened. All I can really say is that I do believe in all my entierly that it's my fault.

It started last February when I admitted to him that I had a crush on him. He was cool with it, and we held the exact same friendship as we always had. One day we were playing Mario Party and I was winning, and he suddenly became a little rude (normally he wins when we play games). Afterwards he seemed a bit distant from me, and then once him and I went on vacation together that summer he wouldn't talk to me at all.

I don't think it helped that in April I called him and asked him to go to prom with me just as friends. At first he told me he'd go then last minute he told me he "didn't like crowds" and bailed.

Part of me claims it's because I liked him, the other claims it's not my fault because it was a full two months before he was acting weird when nothing even happened. All I know is that suddenly he refused to talk to me. It's water under the bridge now.

 

[DTP]

._________.

Doesn't sound like it's your fault at all, but yeah, kinda confusing way to end things.

 

[Thatfatcat]

I'm too mentally unstable to have friends.

 

[hemlock]

I'm too mentally unstable to have friends.

If you want to try to be friends with me, I'll give it a shot.

Honestly to this day i'm not entierly sure what happened. All I can really say is that I do believe in all my entierly that it's my fault.

Not that it is my business MotS, but I don't see how it is your fault. You feel how you felt, you were honest about it, I don't see what's wrong with that. If your honest feeling made him uncomfortable or weird, that's HIS fault. You can't control people's actions, only your reaction.

Did he act weird because of what you said? No idea. But I think sharing personal feelings and being honest is a key part of best friend-ship.

 

[Thatfatcat]

If you want to try to be friends with me, I'll give it a shot.



Not that it is my business MotS, but I don't see how it is your fault. You feel how you felt, you were honest about it, I don't see what's wrong with that. If your honest feeling made him uncomfortable or weird, that's HIS fault. You can't control people's actions, only your reaction.

Did he act weird because of what you said? No idea. But I think sharing personal feelings and being honest is a key part of best friend-ship.

You don't want to be friends with me. I've

a)set fire to peoples clothing
b) manipulated people to be my minions

Oh, and I tend to make people kill themselves. I'm kinda big on mind control and power.

 

[hemlock]

You don't want to be friends with me. I've

a)set fire to peoples clothing
b) manipulated people to be my minions

Oh, and I tend to make people kill themselves. I'm kinda big on mind control and power.

Well, I'm not that worried since so far this friendship would only exist online. Offer still stands. I'll let you know if I change my mind. Try me

 

[Thatfatcat]

Well I did induce two kids attempted suicide on another forum.... but sure. What's good?

 

[hemlock]

I'll PM you to keep this thread on the BF topic!

 

[Thatfatcat]

h'okay. sounds good

btw-people these days are pure hate machines. animals are better. =)

 

[DTP]

h'okay. sounds good

btw-people these days are pure hate machines. animals are better. =)

When have people NOT been hate machines.

 

[Merkuri]

I leave this thread for a day and spam takes over. Thatfatcat was clearly troling but at least someone had the sense of mind to continue the discussion in PMs.

Honestly to this day i'm not entierly sure what happened. All I can really say is that I do believe in all my entierly that it's my fault.

It started last February when I admitted to him that I had a crush on him. He was cool with it, and we held the exact same friendship as we always had. One day we were playing Mario Party and I was winning, and he suddenly became a little rude (normally he wins when we play games). Afterwards he seemed a bit distant from me, and then once him and I went on vacation together that summer he wouldn't talk to me at all.

I don't think it helped that in April I called him and asked him to go to prom with me just as friends. At first he told me he'd go then last minute he told me he "didn't like crowds" and bailed.

Part of me claims it's because I liked him, the other claims it's not my fault because it was a full two months before he was acting weird when nothing even happened. All I know is that suddenly he refused to talk to me. It's water under the bridge now.

I really don't see why you think it's your fault. You telling him you liked him didn't break the friendship. I can't imagine you beating him in a game being the cause of the friendship to break, and if it was then he is an idiot and it wouldn't have worked out anyways. Did you ever ask him what the problem was and why he started acting differently towards you? Do you feel as if you ever got closure to the relationship?

BTW was it one of those situations where you liked him but said(or otherwise indicated) that you didn't want to be with him? I've been in that scenario before and it sucks when you like the person back. Obviously it's worse when that person is your best friend.

 

[MASAHIROx]

stop spamming the thread.

wtf you never should have told him you had a crush on him. Its hes straight and you know it...thats probably the LAST thing that he wants to hear out of your mouth. Now hes just gonna think of all those times that you guys were 'close' you were digging him.

its DEFF your fault. Keep things like that to yourself unless YOUR SURE he might like you like that too.

I would feel the same way if i was in the awkward situation. You're right things never would be the same.

 

[Merkuri]

^ Oh? I assumed Moon of the Strawberries was a girl. My response is kind dumb if MotS is a guy.

 

[Moon of the Strawberries]

BTW was it one of those situations where you liked him but said(or otherwise indicated) that you didn't want to be with him? I've been in that scenario before and it sucks when you like the person back. Obviously it's worse when that person is your best friend.

At first he was completely fine with it. We actually got closer once I told him. I was, at one point, wondering if he felt the same for me as well. But then suddenly one day he became rather cruel in a sense, so i'm a little confused even now.

wtf you never should have told him you had a crush on him. Its hes straight and you know it...thats probably the LAST thing that he wants to hear out of your mouth. Now hes just gonna think of all those times that you guys were 'close' you were digging him.

its DEFF your fault. Keep things like that to yourself unless YOUR SURE he might like you like that too.

I would feel the same way if i was in the awkward situation. You're right things never would be the same.

Please keep in mind that i'm indeed a girl. Thank you.

Also, when you're around someone who randomly hugs you, calls you every day and invites you to go with the mall with them three times a week just to 'hang out' you'd be wondering too.

 

[MASAHIROx]

lol i thought you were a guy nevermind my badd

 

[Merkuri]

At first he was completely fine with it. We actually got closer once I told him. I was, at one point, wondering if he felt the same for me as well. But then suddenly one day he became rather cruel in a sense, so i'm a little confused even now.

Yes I understand that. But my question is was the possibility of a relationship between you guys ever brought up? Did you ever tell him that despite your feelings you didn't want to be with him?

I asked because I've been in a very similar situation, and I know it's really upsetting when you and your best friend like each other but she doesn't want a relationship. It's even more upsetting when you feel as if the source of your feelings for her was the confession she made of the feelings she has for you.

 

[MT_]

I think a "best friend" is judged not by how much time is spent between the two friends, but by the extent to which time will wither away at the bond between the two friends.

I have a friend that I rarely ever talk to, but whenever the opportunity arises or is pursued by either of us (even after months without any sort of communication) and we meet up again, we are still as close to each other as you can get with any friend.

Other friends, in comparison, cannot stand the test of time. Even if the friends in your immediate and daily life seem very close to you, if the bond between the two of you can deteriorate because of separation, then they are probably not a "best friend".

Nothing should be able to ruin the friendship. Nothing is required to keep the friendship strong, other than maybe mutual understanding of each other. The strength of the friendship is based on the compatibility and past experiences surrounding the two people in the friendship. In my opinion, if someone has reached "best friend" status, then you don't need to do anything to keep the strength of the friendship up, because you already know each other well enough that you know the friendship could not possibly deteriorate (unless they changed so dramatically that they became a completely different person, in which case, they aren't the same person that you were "best friends" with).

 

[DTP]

I think a "best friend" is judged not by how much time is spent between the two friends, but by the extent to which time will wither away at the bond between the two friends.

I have a friend that I rarely ever talk to, but whenever the opportunity arises or is pursued by either of us (even after months without any sort of communication) and we meet up again, we are still as close to each other as you can get with any friend.

Other friends, in comparison, cannot stand the test of time. Even if the friends in your immediate and daily life seem very close to you, if the bond between the two of you can deteriorate because of separation, then they are probably not a "best friend".

Nothing should be able to ruin the friendship. Nothing is required to keep the friendship strong, other than maybe mutual understanding of each other. The strength of the friendship is based on the compatibility and past experiences surrounding the two people in the friendship. In my opinion, if someone has reached "best friend" status, then you don't need to do anything to keep the strength of the friendship up, because you already know each other well enough that you know the friendship could not possibly deteriorate (unless they changed so dramatically that they became a completely different person, in which case, they aren't the same person that you were "best friends" with).

Dude.

What an awesome perspective. I couldn't agree more with everything you just said.

 

[PD4FR]

I think a "best friend" is judged not by how much time is spent between the two friends, but by the extent to which time will wither away at the bond between the two friends.

I have a friend that I rarely ever talk to, but whenever the opportunity arises or is pursued by either of us (even after months without any sort of communication) and we meet up again, we are still as close to each other as you can get with any friend.

Other friends, in comparison, cannot stand the test of time. Even if the friends in your immediate and daily life seem very close to you, if the bond between the two of you can deteriorate because of separation, then they are probably not a "best friend".

Nothing should be able to ruin the friendship. Nothing is required to keep the friendship strong, other than maybe mutual understanding of each other. The strength of the friendship is based on the compatibility and past experiences surrounding the two people in the friendship. In my opinion, if someone has reached "best friend" status, then you don't need to do anything to keep the strength of the friendship up, because you already know each other well enough that you know the friendship could not possibly deteriorate (unless they changed so dramatically that they became a completely different person, in which case, they aren't the same person that you were "best friends" with).

That was beautiful. If I was allowed to have one this long, I would sig this.

 

[hemlock]

MT_ , I just have to chime in and say that was very wonderfully and eloquently stated.

 

[Merkuri]

3 posts just to say they thought it was a great post. Never seen that before. Good Job MT.

Let's please move on though.

 

[PD4FR]

3 posts just to say they thought it was a great post. Never seen that before. Good Job MT.

Let's please move on though.

Sorry, I had gotten ninja'd by 5 hours.

Anyways, is there any way to become best friends with someone, or does it just happen? I'm curious, because I don't have any best friends, and I'm wondering if I'm doing something wrong.

Edit - Never mind, what was I thinking when I asked that, haha. I think it just happens. I need to find better people, lol.

 

[Merkuri]

Sorry, I had gotten ninja'd by 5 hours.

Anyways, is there any way to become best friends with someone, or does it just happen? I'm curious, because I don't have any best friends, and I'm wondering if I'm doing something wrong.

Edit - Never mind, what was I thinking when I asked that, haha. I think it just happens. I need to find better people, lol.

Yeah it just happens. Although I often imagine a scenario where I meet someone, we hit it off and I asked them if them if they want to be best friends with me, and that person agrees. I think that's possible, although I imagine very unlikely.

 

[PD4FR]

Yeah it just happens. Although I often imagine a scenario where I meet someone, we hit it off and I asked them if them if they want to be best friends with me, and that person agrees. I think that's possible, although I imagine very unlikely.

I guess I've just got to keep waiting, like I thought.
I'll settle with my regular friends for now; they're fun to be around, anyways.
Oh, and who knows, maybe one of them or more will soon be best friends!