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  • "Christorians" explaining how having more intimate personal info documented online for some random woman who made a bad webcomic then we have for Ghandi, Genghis Khan, all 3 MLKs, and Hitler combined is completely OK and ethical. (she's a bad person, so obviously that means we should throw out all of our fundamental human ethics!)
    God, it is horrific how Smash fans treat games and characters themed around suicide and depression - I was rereading the response to my Miner Willy submission for Infinite, and everyone was up in arms over him and Freddi Fish when Sunny was right there to direct hate to. Somehow having no powers or being made for babies is a bigger problem than being from a game about teenage suicide???
    Rare literally ported a ZX Spectrum game into one of their 90s tentpole releases as a mandatory quest for any% completion and elder Nintendo fans still think the gaming crash happened worldwide.

    i apologise for today's double-bout of 3d platformer fandom mockery.
    Fans of Zoogly Dooby walking into an important financial meeting unannounced to inform the Affable Software stockholders that Zoogly Dooby is officially their mascot despite not having a single poster or statue in the building and the name not even ringing a bell to those who invested in the company circa 1998.
    I genuinely don't know why so many people's first thought when they saw Ember leaked for NASB 2 is "what about the supermarket shooter?" - I had only really heard of Ember through the shootings, and I didn't immediately think that - just "Huh, another 2000s villain! Guess we're not getting Luna Loud now that the rock star niche is covered, haha."

    In general, I think the internet has a really weird habit of latching on to "the dark side" of childrens' media and ignoring basically everything else - where, if it isn't something both universal and relevant-in-the-2000s like Shrek; Mario; or SpongeBob, the entire discussion will become an obnoxious loop of "wasn't that one sex joke weird?", "that behind-the-scenes creep should be locked up", or "damn, that eldritch-abomination boss fight went hard".
    I can't believe the argument against Barbie disproving the whole "woke = broke" BS is "it was falsely advertised"

    Like... you could make a case for the advertising hiding the film's PG-13 sensibilities or deeper themes, but in the case of "wokeness" were you genuinely not expecting a movie based on Barbie of all things to have feminist themes??? Who the hell do you think is the target audience? I don't think tradwives are all too lucrative a market.
    I know that "they didn't have to go THAT hard on the music for THIS game" is a bit of a cliche, and it really shouldn't be shocking to see great music made for the sake of meme freeware or cheap licensed tie-ins after a while, but god damn, Logan Kart 8, man. I don't even think they got paid for this.
    They ****ing killed Uberduck. I'm mad.
    i started writing a lost media wiki article for the ugly sonic cut under the presumption that it may exist but probably doesn't, and then found a source saying for certain that the ugly cut doesn't exist right as i was finishing it off, so i had to scrap it because reworking the article to change every instance of "it is unknown if..." to "... does not exist" would be too tedious.

    how's your day?
    I love the old "Ash vs. Red" comparison memes from the 2000s because like... all this tells me is that Ash is a well-written adaptation of Red??? Red is a character in a medium where stakes are derived from player choice and personalities are derived from imagination, while Ash is a character in a medium where negative consequences should be in some form unavoidable, personality defines a character, and a large recurring cast is essential.
    Internal Frickface
    Internal Frickface
    they both suck

    edit: i think this is very silly, with how the second image tries to make red out to be a badass with "lone wolf" and "his rival is his b****", it really is just the classic equivalent of modern day kirby fans where they try to make kirby out to be a cold blooded god slayer who goes on rampages over cakes

    also where does that first image even get the "red lost because of injuries", are they literally just pulling out of their ass
    Torgo the Bear
    Torgo the Bear
    In actual Pokemon lore, Red is a really strong and skilled Trainer, but he doesn't really hold any significance beyond being a Champion and the guy who beat Team Rocket... who are decidedly one of the least threatening Teams we've seen so far since they only perform gangster/yakuza activities rather than attempting to destroy the entire world or something. The only reason he's such a big deal is really just because Game Freak keeps bringing him back for the seven billionth round of Gen 1 nostalgia.
    Torgo the Bear
    Torgo the Bear
    I will say this, however- I do like that Red kept the "silent protagonist" thing going. Masters has confirmed that this is actually a case of being selectively mute, (he does actually say things on rare occasions in that game, with his first words being "words are unnecessary") but it's still fun to me that they actually ran with him being quiet. None of the other player characters are like that though...

    (Although Masters does confirm that the Sun and Moon protagonists really do just tend to stare blankly for long periods of time just like they do in the game's cutscenes, so that's another brilliant detail in the same vein imo)
    Rise of the Robots rep in Smash would go hard. There's some really cool character designs that could do with an appearance in a (as much as I hate on modern Smash) structurally-functional game, it's technically 90s computer rep, and it's just as much a part of gaming history as DKC - if anything, it's failure gives it a bigger place in the history books.
    1. T - it's ****ing Twitter
    2. I - "Information" "intelligence". Maybe not apt, but certainly a good image.
    3. E - If Elon indeed wants to make an "everything app", it's quite fitting to use the suffix for "digital...".
    4. Y - Sounds like "why", making it good for an app about communication, also not in much use.
    5. C - Sounds like "see", very fitting for an app about posting images
    6. U - Sounds like "you" - again, fitting for an "everything app".
    7. W - Considered a positive term on Twitter. Could maybe make for a good rename for hearts if you want to make the app seem less serious.
    8. O - Could represent a level of surprise, as in "Oh!".
    9. A - "Eeeeyy!!" is somewhat fitting for a social app?
    10. B - Sounds a little unusually philosophical, but continues the "tiny flying animal making an annoying noise" theme.
    11. M - "Mmmm" sounds uncertain, which could be good or bad depending on whether Elon wants to make a platform centered on information or opinion.
    12. R - Often evokes R-rated movies, maybe not unfit, but not a good look either.
    13. Z - Too 2000s corporate urban. Also brings sleeping to mind. Could be a positive for how sleek it sounds though.
    14. P - Peepee funny. At the very least it aligns with Elon's track record.
    15. V - "The V-Card". Perhaps fitting, but not good for profits.
    16. D - "She wants the D". Also makes it seem Disney-affiliated.
    17. S/J - Often used to express sarcasm, makes the site seem insincere. Tied.
    18. G - Even after going to bat for W, "gee!" would sound way too silly
    19. L - Negative Twitter terminology. Unpronounceable in some dialects.
    20. H - Sounds a lot like "hate" when said on it's own - Elon may love that, but it's bad for profits.
    21. Q - Would be one of the better ones to use for its uncommon nature and allusions to "questions" - if not for a certain conspiracy.
    22. K - Also associated with a hate group, but without the benefits Q has.
    23. F - One of the two letters that is universally accepted to always stand for another, and it's not a good look
    24. N - Same as F, but a much worse look.
    25. X - You already know the negative online implications of "X", Elon, and now you're just another one.
    The more I read from Sakurai, the more I realise that I genuinely do not like this man, in a way that goes beyond simply "I disagree with his game design philosophy". Seems to have a pretty huge ego, loves to yap on about "everything he goes through", and responds to criticism (even the criticisms I disagree with, like those of clones) incredibly poorly whenever he choses to do so.
    Trying to convince someone who believes opinions are set in stone that it isn't worth trying to get something as comically impossible as a non-major fighting game with active quickplay - all the while, talk of a real world tragic shooting plays out in the distance. How delightful!/s.
    The "Waluigi was just created to be Wario's sports partner" argument is so funny now I think about it - because that would make him one of the only major Mario characters ever to be created to serve a diegetic in-universe purpose and not around some kind of gameplay functionality
    NASB 2 leaks looking hot.
    I think the best fan theories are on the opposite sides of the spectrum - either really inconsequential and easily-disproven but cute single-sentence stuff ("Donkey is from Pleasure Island", "Moe intentionally overreacts to prank calls to make Bart happy"), or elaborate, horrific-to-the-point-of-parody motives given to otherwise inconsequential characters (literally anything the Theorizer puts out, MatPat's recent Goldfish theory) - anything inbetween or made with the actual intent of serious speculation is just garbo.
    Watching video essays about 2010s kids show melodrama is so funny because it's always someone completely straight faced saying "I can't believe it! Twinkle Toes Tapir committed genocide against the entire Equineox race to prove her love to Crabbybara! And the effects of the Hypno-Laundry Powder Monsoon were long worn off by then, so there's no excuse! Doesn't she know that Crabbybara's best friend, Bill Neigh the Silent Guy, is an Equineox? And why was she so quick to forgive the Totally Bodacious Talking Sock Puppet for all the emotional gaslighting during their previous relationship??"

    Not saying you can't tell an epic story with character names like this or whatever, just that it's very funny when put in a video essay format.
    I had a weird, vaguely religious dream where I was working for Nintendo's US marketing department in the 90s, and we ended up filming a guy farting in a bathtub while wearing a Superman cape as a commercial. Can't even remember the specific game, so a real "burgers?" moment.
    I've talked about the Beano a lot in the past. British cultural staple, funny coincidence, lots of weird archaic synonyms for "laugh", so on. A lot of fond childhood memories, good times had by all. However, there's one thing from the Beano that has stuck in my mind for years - I can barely remember any of the comics (though I do remember a lot from the early 2010s reboot of the Dandy, and quite fondly), but every second of this DVD - The Beano Videostars - sticks in my head.

    I believe it's the only DVD I ever wore out because I watched it so much, it came in a two pack with another Beano direct to video movie - The Beano Video, renamed to The Beano All-Stars - both pasted directly from VHS format with a few meta jokes relating to the format left in - I preferred this one since it had a rather fun cinema framing device and a music video. However, that's not really what I want to talk about - I want to talk about the one thing I remember most from this - "The Bash Street Kids in: The New School".

    The word "childhood trauma" gets thrown around a lot online, so I'll try not to use it here as it doesn't apply, I don't get PTSD flashbacks to this silly low-budget British kids' movie or anything, nor did it effect my psyche. I'd say it's more "a thing that kinda put me on edge as a kid". I can go back to it now with no issues, and I was kinda stupid for reacting in the way I did to it as a kid.

    For non-Brits unfamiliar with them, the Bash Street Kids are a pretty typical cartoon troupe of kids - a bunch of rowdy archetypes of British childhood nostalgia, the only one you need to know by name is Plug - the tall kid who's really ugly, but all the girls see as a heartthrob, simple character with a simple gag. This is the only Bash Street Story on this AVAB (Assigned VHS at Birth) DVD, but it is easily the most memorable part of the whole thing - and not necessarily in a bad way either.

    The plot of the skit is that the Ofsted inspector comes to visit, and is appalled by the condition of Bash Street school so he sends the kids to a new, sleek, modern academy where the teachers are robots, while the original teachers are left homeless due to a lack of a job - leaving Plug to realize the crappy situation and get his friends out of the academy. Happy ending where Plug makes a rap song so bad it makes the kids realize what's up, the academy explodes, the inspector is out of a job, the teachers have their jobs back, and the kids are back to their old mischief.

    "oh boy, another cartoon predicted AI!" OK, now that's out of the way, the thing that put me on edge about this as a kid wasn't any of those plot points I just mentioned, it was something I intentionally forgot to mention for dramatic effect: that the kids were given plastic surgery and brainwashed into "perfect children" - the tomboy becomes girly, the fat kid becomes buff, the glasses kid gets contacts, so on, yet still weren't "perfect" enough and were threatened with "being vaporized where they stand" for innocent things like asking questions - this gave me bad vibes as a kid, didn't make me scream or cry persay but certainly made me unsettled, and I could never figure out why - I could stand shows like Ed, Edd, n' Eddy and Billy & Mandy that had way more disturbing imagery and themes just fine, and everything else that freaked me out at that age I still fully understand - I always just pinned it down to being conditioned by other children's media to fear compliance - that was until very recently, when I realized that's because it's literally just my childhood as a "gifted child"/"naughty child" - through a wacky cartoon lens.

    It's not a good skit mind you, it isn't all that funny, the plot just kinda... happens, and I'm pretty sure they didn't mean to portray it how I interpreted it, just a "maths bad, pranks good" power fantasy and nothing else, even in the 0% chance they did intentionally make an autistic allegory it doesn't actually say anything insightful or provide proper solutions beyond "listen to corporate white rap in class", the plot provides little opportunity for classic Bash Street pranks, and the entire animation of the special/movie/whatever looks like it was drawn with permanent marker - but the theme of being expected to be "normal", then cooperating as hard you can and failing anyway... hits too close to home. The main difference between kid me and the Bash Street gang in this story is that they were trying to be naughty and get a rise, I was just labeled as that despite being quite the moralist at that age. Absolutely overthinking things here, I bet only like, 2 other kids at most were disturbed by this any more than any other random kids' show one-off villain plot, it's all very daft and young me was certainly overreacting, even if those reactions were merely "vibes" - and at the very least, it was reassuring and had its heart in the right place, unlike Grizzly Tales. Don't get me started on Grizzly Tales - the only thing worse than the weird GoAnimate-tier child punishment fantasies in that thing is the voice acting. I appreciate this story in a weird way, not necessarily for being good but just for being one of the first things to - even if unintentionally - tell kid-me that something's fishy about how adults treat me.

    Anyway, on a much lighter note, the ending of this DVD is hilarious. Dennis the Menace gets a love interest - and is so disgusted after realizing that he kissed a girl that he breaks out of the cinema screen, walks past his real-world self who presumably was some kind of Roger Rabbit cartoon actor, and then modifies the film reel to cut out the kiss scene. The girl gasps sadly, and then it rolls credits to stock cheer SFX. Chad behaviour.
    fogbadge
    fogbadge
    never though i'd see you talking about something from my childhood. but i would to share if i may the background of this particular story. in 1994 the original bash street kids comic was given an overhaul featuring many of the same changes seen here. minus the brainwashing part as this was a reboot. anyway the changes were undone after the negative reception and the changes were reverted. so the short was meant to be a parody of it.
    Champion of Hyrule
    Champion of Hyrule
    This is only vaguely related but I remember getting a The Dandy comic as a kid from my Scottish grandpa and even though I unfortunately lost it and moved out of that house I remember reading it over and over again and really liking it. I thought it was the same thing as Beano and this post inspired me to finally go down the weird comic I had as a kid rabbit hole looking up both companies. (I vaguely remember a comic about a character I think might have been dennis the menace though so I don’t know if this was some kind of crossover comic though)
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