Wario Wario Wario

Wario Wario Wario · Feb 5, 2022

Other creation threads: "Submit a yellow character." "Question Block?" "Yeah, sure, you can make a Question Block playable. Why the hell not?"

Infinite: "Now you have read all 185 criteria for this job, please submit a fighter" "Well, I just read the list and Question Block doesn't break any specific rul-" "Rule 186: No Question Block."

Wario Wario Wario · Feb 5, 2022

Given how much of a thread the "must've been on a Nintendo console" fan rule is on, and how the idea of console manufacturers only releasing their games on their platforms is starting to become irrelevant, it's more specifically just an anti-Sony rule at this point.

Wario Wario Wario · Feb 5, 2022

I can 100% understand criticising NASB for the lack of items in what is at the end of the day a kids' game, but not for the lack of ultimate/Final Smash moves - ultimate moves have historically not really worked in platform fighters (including casual Smash), and while you could find a way to pull it off, NASB isn't really the place since it's whole gimmick is being super fast and super offense-based - when Reptar can deal 30% damage with a (roughly) 15-frame uncharged down B, what use would he have for 5-second long building topple that deals 70%?

Wario Wario Wario · Feb 5, 2022

We should start a Kickstarter to make Thaddeus Sakurai record new Snake codecs for Rivals of Aether 3D.

Wario Wario Wario · Feb 5, 2022

The origin of lowercase-L GilvaSunner is actually kinda sad

Wario Wario Wario · Feb 5, 2022

If Masked Man got in Smash it would be really, really hard to make out the Smash showrunners in fanfiction as the good guys - not really an argument against him (though I still think that's a really bad idea), but the ethics elephant in the room of reviving a dead child and forcing him to relive the most traumatic stage of his short life on live TV while in the presence of his brother would be extremely hard to ignore in a slice-of-life "Smash Mansion" setting.

Wario Wario Wario · Feb 4, 2022

Eventually the mods will step their foot down on the kids' movie scrips, mark my words.

Wario Wario Wario · Feb 4, 2022

I think the overlap between the regulars of the NASB general thread and the Critique Smash Bros. thread says something but I'm not sure what.

Wario Wario Wario · Feb 4, 2022

Wario Wario Wario · Feb 4, 2022

I'm the biggest NASB simp on this entire site and even I wouldn't say "Chaddeus" unironically

Linkmain-maybe · Feb 4, 2022

I just realized… Jinbe Land is lost…

Wario Wario Wario · Feb 4, 2022

Highly niche Rock-A-Fire Explosion reconstruction YouTube channels in 2014 when they finally started getting views, but all the comments are about the bite of 87.

Wario Wario Wario · Feb 4, 2022

The way that Tooth Tunes were depicted as transmitting their music to the brain in ads always looked really painful.

Wario Wario Wario · Feb 4, 2022

It's honestly really sad that reveal trailer hype is basically Smash's entire brand now - feels like a tumour that's slowly covering the entire body and restricting the franchise from doing anything interesting.

Wario Wario Wario · Feb 4, 2022

DK acts in Smash the way Bowser should be acting.

Wario Wario Wario · Feb 4, 2022

Wario Wario Wario · Feb 4, 2022

In Nick Kart Racers 2, the Avatar State is just an item anyone can use. That means that, canonically, Squidward is a reincarnation of the Avatar.

Wario Wario Wario · Feb 3, 2022

One thing I've learned from checking the "controversial" filter on Reddit is that crypto bros legit believe right click memes are a propaganda conspiracy to stop GameStop from opening their NFT marketplace.

Wario Wario Wario · Feb 3, 2022

Even though he kinda screams "main character for the sake of main character"/completionist pick, I love that Lincoln Loud is in NASB because 1. he's really fun to play, and 2. compared to other kid characters in fighting games (including NASB itself), he doesn't have a mature disposition; depectively innocent charm; or powers beyond comprehension as result of a life-changing journey - he's just a clumsy, smug little albino boy with a water gun and toy rocket.

Wario Wario Wario · Feb 3, 2022

The soundtracks to NASB and Nick Kart Racers 2 feel like they were switched at birth or something - the kart racer has really intense, blood-pumping tunes with lots of guitar solos; while the competitive platform fighter tends to go for a more laid-back true-to-the-source-materal approach.

Wario Wario Wario · Feb 3, 2022

Lucas being in (the modern incarnation of) Smash and getting a mass-produced amiibo is kinda funny to me in the same way that Wall-E consistantly showing up to Disney's big IP showcases and getting an NFT is funny.

I mean, sure, Wall-E has nowhere near as radical an approach to its anti-consumerism message as Mother 3, but Lucas' merchandising is nowhere as extreme as Wall-E's so it evens itself out.

Wario Wario Wario · Feb 3, 2022

I really wish the next Smash game would treat its newcomers as no big deal, like you just wake up one day, check the website and say "hey, Waluigi's in!"

Unannounced blog posts are the optimal method of revealing video game content.

Wario Wario Wario · Feb 3, 2022

Wario Wario Wario · Feb 3, 2022

It's funny how (to my knowledge) Mario Kart has more heavy metal music than Smash

Wario Wario Wario · Feb 3, 2022

I don't know why people say Piranha Plant was such a rule-breaking expectation-changing Smash pick. It's a regular part of the standard Mario platformer cast, known to billions around the world and merchandised to hell and back - if anything it just cemented obscure and retro characters as no longer being part of the Smash brand, swapped for weird or funny characters.

Wario Wario Wario · Feb 3, 2022

Wario Wario Wario · Feb 3, 2022

I kinda wanna have a go at de-genericising all the original Smash items.

Wario Wario Wario · Feb 3, 2022

I don't think I've ever seen a game series more let down by its art style alone than New Super Mario Bros. - those games would be way more acclaimed and beloved if they just chose a slightly different art style every instalment.

Makes me wonder if Mario World would be as beloved if it was an NES game that reused SMB3's graphical assets...

Wario Wario Wario · Feb 3, 2022

Galeem is a mindless, genocidal beast who managed to bring the likes of Bayonetta; Palutena; and Professor Chops to their semi-ends, yet he's easily the least scary anthropomorphic sun Nintendo has ever put out.

also he didnt catch dry bones buzzy beetle or any pac man character introduced after 1984 get rekt

Wario Wario Wario · Feb 3, 2022

Wario Wario Wario · Feb 2, 2022

I feel that if I were the director of an alternate-universe PS/MS Smash Bros. and got a deal sorted with Nintendo, I'd skip Mario and go straight for Donkey Kong. Partially bias, but also because all things considered nobody's favourite Mario character is Mario and I don't really see much reason for him to be in if he isn't the super-standard shoto archetype.

Wario Wario Wario · Feb 2, 2022

The concept of the Popeye Switch game actually sounds really cool - a 3D reimagining of an 80s arcade game with the exact same mechanics and no modern touch ups other than the 3D levels.

Wario Wario Wario · Feb 2, 2022

If Nintendo pursuaded me to add a character I created to Smash, these would be my ground rules

The character must use exclusively original abilities and mechanics with absolutely nothing taken from the source material
The character must be protrayed as uncharacteristically frightened and cowardly in battle, but uncharacteristically smug and bragadocious upon victory
The character's trailer must contain multiple jokes about how they're only doing it for the money and generally find their inclusion demeaning
The character and stage must be modeled in a PS1 low poly style - that includes BMP compressed textures.

Wario Wario Wario · Feb 2, 2022

SANS

Wario Wario Wario · Feb 2, 2022

I don't know why people say "you just don't find insert female comedian here funny because she isn't sexy!" when one of the biggest legitimate criticisms that's often given to bad female comedians is their overreliance on sexual humour

Wario Wario Wario · Feb 2, 2022

why does the geico wiki have the entire transcript of toy story sorted into dvd chapters

Wario Wario Wario · Feb 2, 2022

I think Adventure Time is the only long-running TV show (at least in animation, I'm not exactly familiar with the 3 dimensional world of media) where opinion is divided between it not having jumped the shark at all or having jumped the shark after its first season - I guess South Park has a bit of a similar situation, but even then the dividing shift didn't come as quick and it's kinda agreed the show entered seasonal rot at some point or another.

Wario Wario Wario · Feb 2, 2022

Shout outs to the person who sung the "weird!" in the Archie's Weird Mysteries intro

Wario Wario Wario · Feb 2, 2022

One childhood memory I should by no means have been upset about even as a 9 year old but still saddens me a little to think about is when the 2011 royal wedding was happening and the RadioTimes (British TV scheduele magazine) was doing submissions for kid-drawn covers - I wanted to submit a drawing, but my parents were adamant I add a tagline reading "My Big Fat Royal Wedding", referencing a popular British TV show at the time called "My Big Fat Gypsy Wedding", which I was unfamiliar with almost entirely except for the fact it was supposedly really offensive - and therefore 9 year old me was uncomfortable with the reference. They kept demanding I add the tagline despite my protests so ultimately I just scrapped the picture.

This may or may not be the Doofenshmirtz backstory for why I hate topical humour.

Wario Wario Wario · Feb 2, 2022

How did I never know there was an Eastenders dress up flash game in the 2000s? Seems like something I should've known about, and memed to death, years ago.

Wario Wario Wario

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