Greetings gentlemen, Wiseguy here - or as my friends like to call me: President of the Sheik-Must-Die Club. It has a relatively small following at the moment (one member) but its mission statement speaks for itself: spread the word that Sheik is the personification of all that is cheap and despicable in this world and should under no circumstances appear in Brawl or any other videogame ever again. Ever.
Sheik is an unsightly blemish on the masterpiece that you and I know and love as Super Smash Bros Melee. Of all the fighting games I've played, I consider the Melee to be among the most fair and balanced. Sure, if you have Robo-cop like reflexes you use Fox and Falco to grind your enemies to a pulp and few characters smile on spammers quite like Marth, but on the whole the game is enjoyable and competitive regardless of your character selection. Enter Sheik. With her ridiculously overpowered and stupidly fast attacks and no weaknesses Sheik tansihes an otherwise multiplayer experience.
Sheik is a scum sucking parasite that ruins otherwise fun tournaments and grudge matches because EVERYONE plays as her, giving them a huge advantage over anyone not playing as a high-tier character. There is only one reason why anyone plays as this cross-dressing abomination: because they lack the skill to play as anyone else. Sometimes the truth hurts.
Fortunately for everyone, there is an approximately zero percent chance of Sheik making a return appearance in Brawl - nerfed or otherwise. In the Zelda series she is by far one of the most insignificant characters. She appeared in a single game as Sheik's alter ego and has yet to make another appearance, meaning that she is as important to the series as the Old man from LoZ and Link’s uncle in ALttP.
Judging from Link's updated Twilight Princess look, Sakurai is more interested in having characters from the newer Zelda series rather than making Brawl a retirement home for outdated characters and irrelevant characters from past Zelda games. Zelda will undoubtedly get a similar Twilight Princess makeover as well as a new moveset that reflects her role in TP. Sheik will surely be axed, making way for more worthy Zelda characters like Midna.
If there were ever any lingering doubts about Sheik imminent removal, they were dashed the moment that it was revealed that Zamus’ moveset is, while not identical to Sheik’s, certainly very similar to it. This is likely the case in order to appease distressed Sheik players when they buy Brawl and discover that Sheik has been removed.
A day of reckoning is at hand. Soon, Sheik will be eliminated from the Smash Bros. roster, thus forcing all the honorless, button mashing Sheik players to face their opponents on an equal playing field. Oh, why a grand day that will be.
