an update: well, fellow 56Kers, the problem has, indeed, been solved with the Wii Shop Channel.
Today I took my Wii over to a person's house who has broadband (along with my router). I did not change a single thing on my routers settings (same channel, same WEP, same SSID, etc). I set everything up, and set up a new connection on the Wii...then I did a connection test: successful. Ok, big whoop, now comes the test:
I went into the Wii Shop Channel, everything, of course, loaded faster. Then comes the screen where I enter the information, I enter it in, then click enter....*gasp*! Not much to my amazement, everything loaded, and I could access the Wii Shop Channel! Yay. The downside? I'm back at my home residence where 56K is king >_>; Now, it locks up first "connecting" screen (where you can move your cursor around). I suspect it's locking up earlier now because the Wii (and Nintendo's website) remembers my Wii and it's setting and input information, so I don't have to enter it in a second time..thus it tries to just go right to the Wii Shop, where it gets stopped cold....
Problem solved my fellow 56Kers, the results are finally in: you're screwed. Unless Nintendo comes out with a firmware upgrade, or changes a number of settings on their sever, we 56Kers are locked out of the Wii shop.
What would be interesting to see, is if ISDN could handle the Wii Shop (I have my doubts on this too).