What's the dumbest thing you've ever heard someone say about Smash?

[Reik]

This is no need for this thread because Smashboards already has an entire section devoted to noobish comments. It's called the Ness boards. Seriously. Go in there and read a few topics. Every other post is like that. It makes me sad.

Here are some noob comments I've heard IRL:

"Falco is faster than Fox."
"Roy is stronger than Marth."
"Jigglypuff is the worst Pokemon in the game."
"Peach sucks."
"Ness is slow."
"Captain Falcon is slow."
"Mewtwo is a great character."
"Fox has the best recovery in the game."
"Rollout is so cheap."
"Ness has the best spike in the game." <- Maybe he was thinking of SSB64
"Ice Climbers suck/are for button-mashing noobs."
"Aha! So you know that secret technique too!" - Noob referring to edgehogging
"WHAT THE **** ARE YOU DOING?!" - Noob seeing waveshining for the first time
"He's breakdance fighting!" - Noob watching me play Luigi.

 

[Eci4]

so this weekend, I went to a Lan party and brought my gamecube.... I beat 3 noobs on a team (with friendly fire OFF)... t'was sad... but also probably the funnest smash experience I've had in a long time... there was a kid who kept doing pika's down B and screaming I'M PWNING YOU! I'M PWNING YOU (I later teamed with him, and we kicked ***....)

anyway... the best I heard was when these people talked this guy up, they were all yeah his kirby is the best thing ever, he went to a big tournament and did awesome...

then the first thing the kirby player says during the match (it was a FFA) was "Hey, you are falling fastyer than normal how are you doing that?"

so I got to explain fastfalls... haha, by the end of the first night they thought we were like gods at the game

 

[rokimomi]

Well when I was a snub, I figured out how to do the samus bomb cancel on the ground and was completly amazed.

"O M G. I CAN DO IT!!!!!!!!"

- "so what?"

"oh yeah....it does absolutely nothing... sorry..."

 

[Frozen Flame]

After visiting an old friend of mine... we used to blay SSB back in the day. He turned all annoying and junk, but this quote made me laugh at him cuz I knew he was serious.
"So what if you beat me at this game, the gamecube controller only has like 2 buttons... why play a game with only 2 buttons."

and also in the same conversation

"This isn't even a real game, wanna play a real game? I'll own you in madden"

yeah... it turns out i hate this guy now

 

[mood4food77]

why does everyone kick me off of a tv?

and how do you change the computer level?

the best one from husband i heard of, he got a lot of money matches after ti, "what's a wavedash?"...noobs money matched him after he asked that...it was pretty funny

 

[mood4food77]

I really don't mean to, I'm Italian.

sorry for the double post but this has to be quoted

and DBR can DI, i fyou watch the king's vids, all of his combo's are off of DI, just most combo's come off of no DI, which is most likely when your hit unexpectedly, and trust me DBR will own most likely 99% percent of all smash players, including me, and the difference between teh first DBR vids and the new one is big, they practically doubled their skills

thank and please enjoy your stay

 

[Lab Rat™]

"why wavedash when you can roll?"
and
"falcons knee is just as good as marths F smash"

 

[Fortress | Sveet]

lol knee owns fsmash :D

anyways, lab rat, is that grubby in your sig (last guy far right)?

 

[technomancer]

This isn't a direct quote but there was some Link dude at CCX who was a total tardbox. He was kinda goth and had a whiny voice, and pretty much everyone there 3-stocked or better him, and he brought his 3 friends and his fat GF who didn't even play. But you know those guys who get so angry that they try to swear but they can't quite ram it through their furiously clenched teeth? That was this guy when I falcon punched him out of his Up-B.

"FFFFFFFFFFFFFFFPPPPPPPPMH"

then he said something like $#@!ing edgeguarding, that ****'s so gay.

lol someone made the mistake of handing him the pool play sheet so he was trying to force everyone to play in order, but once he realized that he sucked he started calling all of his matches off, and then he stopped calling his matches when he got tired of losing,

Edit: Oh yeah, and the one guy who he could have beat (2nd worst in our pool, pretty cool guy just not on the same level as everyone else), he walked out and started complaining to the manager I think about how we were the cheatzors or something, because it looked like he was pissed, and the guy was like "God ****it that was the one match I would have won!"

 

[HyruleBird]

a Noob once said to me " stop wavedashing you are making me lag...."

i had to slap him

 

[Vicious Delicious]

"lol, nobody uses Peach, she sucks"- Peter, noob at Gigabits.
"By the way, wth is a shine?"- Dietsnapple, user on Smashboards
"Yeah, wavedashing is easy. You just gotta jump and airdodge a diffrent direction!" Unknown noob at Gamestop in Naples, FL.
"if you get hit by link's spinning attack 3 times in a row you will be spinning until you die. nothing can hit you except projectiles."- Smartedd, user on TXMafia

Yeah, those rock

 

[Aiser]

lol this was back in ssb64, my friends were like

different colorlinks give you different stat bonuses!

red = strong offense.
blue = Stronger defense
green = none
purple = special increases

when i asked wehat special was I got no answer lol.

 

[flaco]

lol k the dumbest thing I heard was um you killed me cheating doing wd back and forth you scared of playing me face to face lol thats all Igot up and left what a noob lol

 

[forkgirl]

My freind fourstocked this guy who claimed to have never lost to anyone before. Afterwards, we invited him to a large tourney in Texas and he couldnt go, but he said something like, "I really wish i could go though, becuase I honestly think i can win it...I know you just beat me, and a lot of people say it, but I'm serious. I think if someone really really wants wants the win bad enough, nothing else matters, and he will win."

 

[mutecebu]

"Stop spamming the superscope!"

I've made a fair share of my own, though. It's amazing how good you can think you are untill you enter a decent tourney, or stumble over to the youtube vids.

 

[Apocalypse™]

"falcons knee is just as good as marths F smash"

Quoting me in this stupid thread?! IT'S TRUE!!!
Whoop your *** anyday.. just not this week cuz college is being gay.

Edit: I got one... "Falco is banned now, you can't pick him anymore..." I was told this after beating a few guys with nothing but SHL and Fsmash... it's inescapable!!

 

[SloT]

Ever heard this one before?
"my controller doesn't work! I could beat you anyday, but not with my controller like this"
NOTE: my controllers suck, and he brought his own... i used my own...when we switched he said the same thing, even though it makes no differance since i used that controller already

 

[Peeze]

"No fair, your guy has a shield"
Then later:
"The L-button does whaaaaat?!?!?!?!?"

 

[Eci4]

Ever heard this one before?
"my controller doesn't work! I could beat you anyday, but not with my controller like this"
NOTE: my controllers suck, and he brought his own... i used my own...when we switched he said the same thing, even though it makes no differance since i used that controller already

I had a friend who always did this... I also only had 2 controllers for my cube, and wanted some more... so I bought one, and kept it in it's case till I got to his place... let him open it, and he still complained... haha

The second brand new one I had him take to a tournament, and open it there... now he has his own controller though and wont complain about it so much because he realized it wasnt that

 

[Silanthous]

N00bs at my school "Man i can beat anyone at Smash..."
ME: "Smash? did someone mention Smash? when and where?"
N00bs "uhhh..... wanna play Tekken..?"

 

[drummer_kid]

i have a friend who up-B spams with link, and when his "tactic" fails i always here this one.

"i ment to push over B WTF god**** controller!!!"

 

[Brookman]

"I win"

asdfasdfasdfasdfasdfasdfasdf

 

[Time/SpaceMage]

A few years back, I was part of a smash group where we all played Temple FFAs with items on. You know the sort. Anyway, this one guy showed up while I was practicing by myself, and sat down for a match. I figured he was new, so I picked Pika so I could mess around and work with a new speed character. He turns off items, sets the stock to 4 instead of 7, then picks black C. Falcon. (At this point, one of my friends says "Whoa. Who's the Captain Falcon, and why does he look so cool?") Then he picks FD before I can select Temple. Match start, the first thing he does is dashdance like a madman.

Now I'm already trying to process all this new information so I'm pretty distracted, and now I'm seeing someone use dashdancing for the first time. Even though I've read about it before, my first reaction is "...what are you doing?" He says "I'm dashdancing." Then he short-hop dairs me and follows it up into a chainthrow. I was so distracted watching the dashdance that I just sat there and watched the dair connect before I realized "oh crap he's good, I gotta pay attention!" Needless to say, he wiped the floor with me. Several times. Also with DK versus my Marth. I never got one stock off him either; it really put me in my place.

So I found out later that guy was darkrain.

Also, that same friend I mentioned earlier was holding his own against darkrain on Corneria, and he's a Samus that doesn't wavedash. Now that's mindgames.

 

[Naota-Kun]

I think the obvious Roy or Link being the best characters in the game (in other words, Top Tier). I laugh when I hear that. I pity a fool who is a n00b.

 

[Brookman]

I really think that "I win" is the worst thing that could ever come out of a noobs mouth, cause it never should.

 

[gamefreak55]

runescape is better then ssbm

 

[Brookman]

if it weren't for your obnoxious sig I'd say you have a point there.


actually, you have a point there, along with an obnoxious sig.

 

[Pikaville]

Powerstone is better than runsecape.Neither are better than smash.

 

[Brookman]

I'm oging to have to ask you to stop using my avatar, THANKS. and he was saying that is something dumb a noob would say, which I myself have heared before.

 

[smashman90]

runescape is better then ssbm

Blasphemy! Because for one, Melee is the one of the best fighting games, period. Secondly, runescape is an rpg, not a fighting game so you can't really compare them. And even though part is off topic, but Dragonfable is better than Runescape.

 

[Eci4]

brookman... wow... wow.... of course people are going to use "your" avatar... there are a limited number to choose from... Or wait, was telling him not to use "Your" avatar something a dumb noob would say?

 

[Aiser]

brookman... wow... wow.... of course people are going to use "your" avatar... there are a limited number to choose from... Or wait, was telling him not to use "Your" avatar something a dumb noob would say?

THis is my post as to what a dumb noob would say.

 

[Cort]

"Like framing a pear, or saving sounds" - Random noob

 

[smashman90]

What in pete's sake does that have to do with Smash Bros.!? Whoever said that must have been a mega-noob. And I thought those were extinct.

 

[Pikaville]

Whoa Brookman.If you want to take the avatar off me,you can pry it from my cold dead hands

If I was a noob I would probably say.

"My sheik would pwn yours therefore I can only use this avatar"

 

[Brookman]

Whoa Brookman.If you want to take the avatar off me,you can pry it from my cold dead hands

If I was a noob I would probably say.

"My sheik would pwn yours therefore I can only use this avatar"

MAN I am really glad that he knwe I was kidding, whoever that ranomd noob was who took me seriously should go on a picnic somewhere, and maybe get eaten by bears or something

 

[Aiser]

"most pros can't beat noobs"

LOL MIRITE?!

 

[-Darc-]

"I love Mike Brookman"

That's the worst I've heard. OH SNAP ZoSo!

 

[Brookman]

that is actually the opposite, aka the most educated statement that can be uttered by a mortal man


your sig is silly

 

[Aiser]

Look it jigglypuff she's a diva