The Unhappy Thread

[Smooth Criminal]

Man up? Man up to what, exactly? That my mother was an abusive, neglectful, and *****ish alcoholic? That she turned my father into a shadow of himself, prone to anger and hurt that we sometimes had to suffer through? That she only took care of her children when it best suited her? That she perpetuated a vicious cycle of ****ing abuse from my pill-popping stepfather that DID NOT stop at beating her, all because she was too ****ing drunk to notice?

The list could go on, like a goddamn litany. That's only a taste of the hell I've been through, and the kind of person that I vaguely acknowledge as "mother."

Tell me, you think group "therapy" is going to help that? You think that now, even after all these years of not talking to any of her progeny, only to call one a wannabe rich ***** recently, that she's going to go for that? Do you have any idea? No, you ****ing don't.

**** you.

Smooth Criminal

 

[Holder of the Heel]

Sorry Vashimus, this is the internet. Normal conversation rules don't apply here unfortunately. As you can see, people are fighting ferociously at shadows.

And he meant the man up remark as towards the rage present in this thread. To stop pointlessly *****ing.

 

[Vashimus]

Good. Now take that anger and move on. Man up, in other words. Dweeling on the past doesn't do anyone any good. Of course, easier said than done. But it can be done.

Actually I do have an idea. I've gone through much worse than you have, believe it or not. So sorry if this comes off as terse or offensive, but I just can't stand to see people feel angsty, especially since, for things I've already overcome, I see as not as big a deal in the grand scheme of things.

Smooth Vashimus

 

[Lore]

Or how about man up and move on. This conversation is going nowhere good.

 

[Smooth Criminal]

What gives you the right?

Answer me that. If you really empathize as you say you do, then you'd understand. It's not as clear-cut as that. This isn't about comparing whose pain is worse. It's about the tacit understanding, the empathy, of what someone else is going through. Telling someone to "just move on" is tantamount to squeezing water out of a rock.

(Directed at Vash, not you, Werekill.)

And Holder, it's not pointless. This has been a long time coming. Believe it or not, ranting like this is doing me good. I've kept it in for too long.

Smooth Criminal

 

[cannedbread]

god ****ing damnit my mother is so gross, who the hell eats honey nut cheerios microwaved and then pours in wheat thins right after a chicken parmesan dinner GOD KILL ME

 

[Chronodiver Lokii]

Dont bottle up your feelings, SC. We are here for you n__n

--

I'm unhappy because i procrastinate. Whoops.

 

[PsychoIncarnate]

I'm unhappy because I bought a pen tablet and tried to install it for the last hour with no luck. Apparently what was wrong was I didn't jam the cord in hard enough

 

[Luigitoilet]

holy crap this thread is irritating.

also i'm unhappy because i'm afraid of being too forward and persistent with some girls. everyone always told me that persistence and open-ness is what girls like, but i almost always have more success with them when i don't care about them or about being particularly nice to them. i want to be sweet to someone but i'm paranoid that it's gonna scare her off or make her disinterested.

 

[Vashimus]

i'm unhappy because i'm afraid of being too forward and persistent with some girls. everyone always told me that persistence and open-ness is what girls like, but i almost always have more success with them when i don't care about them or about being particularly nice to them. i want to be sweet to someone but i'm paranoid that it's gonna scare her off or make her disinterested.

Well, you can be forward, though having some degree of subtlety makes it work better. In general, you should always be open about your intentions, and don't beat around the bush. It puts the girl at ease and she'll admire your honesty. Let's face it, there's really no reason you should lie to a girl about being interested in the first place. If a girl doesn't know what you want, she'll put her guard up. So always try and show your interest, and do so with confidence.

As for persistence, it all depends on if you're being persistent with a girl who was interested in you or not. Persistense works, but sometimes, you just gotta know when it's a lost cause.

I have a lot of advice to give on this, but I need more context to help you out. What exactly happened?

 

[Falconv1.0]

Is that man enough for you guys?

 

[Chronodiver Lokii]

Hair is being unreasonable D:
Anyone have any tips for reducing split ends/tangling in long hair? If i cant get it under control, i'm probably just going to get my hair chopped and donate the healthy parts

 

[Froggy]

Man up? Man up to what, exactly? That my mother was an abusive, neglectful, and *****ish alcoholic? That she turned my father into a shadow of himself, prone to anger and hurt that we sometimes had to suffer through? That she only took care of her children when it best suited her? That she perpetuated a vicious cycle of ****ing abuse from my pill-popping stepfather that DID NOT stop at beating her, all because she was too ****ing drunk to notice?

The list could go on, like a goddamn litany. That's only a taste of the hell I've been through, and the kind of person that I vaguely acknowledge as "mother."

Tell me, you think group "therapy" is going to help that? You think that now, even after all these years of not talking to any of her progeny, only to call one a wannabe rich ***** recently, that she's going to go for that? Do you have any idea? No, you ****ing don't.

**** you.

Smooth Criminal

I kinda have to agree with Vashimus that it would be helpful for your mommy issues if you went into therapy. Therapy helped me deal a lot with my issues, but at the very least it simply cannot hurt to try.

I'm unhappy that I feel this incessant need to give my female friends money to make them like me more. I recently reconnected with a very good friend, who invited me out to her youth program, even offered to house me over there for a few days, and I have to insist on buying gifts for her and her family, even though she kept telling me not to do that. I grew up with a lot more money than most of my peers do, and in highschool, I used to get asked for money a lot, and now sometimes I feel like I'm trying to buy friendships. It's a problem of mine I ignore too much and it's about time that I rectify it.

 

[Claire Diviner]

I'm unhappy that I feel this incessant need to give my female friends money to make them like me more. I recently reconnected with a very good friend, who invited me out to her youth program, even offered to house me over there for a few days, and I have to insist on buying gifts for her and her family, even though she kept telling me not to do that. I grew up with a lot more money than most of my peers do, and in highschool, I used to get asked for money a lot, and now sometimes I feel like I'm trying to buy friendships. It's a problem of mine I ignore too much and it's about time that I rectify it.

The best thing to do is never buy gifts for people, especially with the intention of making them more fond of you. More often than not, said people will take advantage of that and use you for everything you're worth, while those who tell you not to do that don't want to feel like they're taking advantage of you, and it also feel awkward to them to constantly receive gifts. If you want to buy things for people, only do so when the occasion calls for it (birthday, Christmas, etc.). Believe me when I say you don't need to spend any money to buy a person's friendship.

 

[Vashimus]

Why are you giving girls gifts Froggy? What exactly are you getting in return? A thank you? A smile? Maybe a hug if you're lucky? Don't do this ever again unless you're really close to a girl.

 

[Froggy]

The best thing to do is never buy gifts for people, especially with the intention of making them more fond of you. More often than not, said people will take advantage of that and use you for everything you're worth, while those who tell you not to do that don't want to feel like they're taking advantage of you, and it also feel awkward to them to constantly receive gifts. If you want to buy things for people, only do so when the occasion calls for it (birthday, Christmas, etc.). Believe me when I say you don't need to spend any money to buy a person's friendship.

It's just so weird for me. In highschool people used to always beg me for money, since I went to an inner city school, I was selfish and mean so I always told them no, but now that I've opened up and I'm not a jerk anymore, I feel bad refusing people who I know are less fortunate than me. For example a reconnected with a different friend of mine a few weeks ago, and she asked me for 40$, I do this for her because she's never asked me for money before, she only has a part time job and she has a kid to feed. Now for her birthday she wants me to buy her a 125$ perfume kit, or just send her the money if I can't bring it to her in person. First of all I don't know why she needs to buy a perfume kit that's so expensive and secondly I'm not even sure such an expensive perfume kit exists, up until writing this I was on the fence as to whether or not I'd buy it for her, but I've decided now that I'm not, it's a waste of money and I can spend it on something more productive. Thanks for the feedback, I needed to hear that.

Why are you giving girls gifts Froggy? What exactly are you getting in return? A thank you? A smile? Maybe a hug if you're lucky? Don't do this ever again unless you're really close to a girl.

Well i actually only do this for girls I'm close to/or very fond of. What I get in return is obviously based on my relationship with the girl, but I'm not usually asking for anything in return anyways. But to answer your question is ranges from ungrateful "you owe me anyways" entitledness to having a girl naked in my bed. Usually it's nothing much though, and I'm seeing why it's an unhealthy habit now.

 

[Vashimus]

Well try not to expend any more effort than you need to. It's not good to look desperate for approval.

This is also why I personally think keeping girls around as friends is usually a waste of my time and effort (keyword: usually), but that's another topic.

 

[Froggy]

@Vashimus: Yeah, I never saw the detriment to the behavior until now. Even if it means I don't form as tight relationships as I used to, it's a behavior that I am still going to correct whenever appropriate.

Ugh I am so self-conscious. I can't help but think that my offering to give gifts and buy her stuff may have corrupted my friend's intentions in having me over. She mentioned not being able to pay for school, so maybe she wants me to help her out with that. Well as of right now my head is that I won't do that, I'll just help her as best as I can with student loans and financial aid{it is going to be a struggle for her}

Also I have to confront my driving teacher about his inconsistency today, I call him at 10 to learn we can schedule our lesson and 2 and half hours later he hasn't given me an answer. Enough is enough, I can't have him keep screwing with my daily schedules like this.

 

[Lythium]

Hair is being unreasonable D:
Anyone have any tips for reducing split ends/tangling in long hair? If i cant get it under control, i'm probably just going to get my hair chopped and donate the healthy parts

Could be a bunch of different factors, but I recommend not using hair dryer/straighteners/whatev on your hair (or don't use them as much if you do), they dry your hair out like crazy, and make more split ends. Also, consider switching to a moisturizing shampoo or conditioner. Comb your hair out when it's damp, with a wide-tooth comb. It will help keep it from tangling.

Also, get a trim, even if it's just an inch or two, it's good for your hair.

I've also heard that after you wash and rinse your hair, rinsing it again in cold water will help the seal the ends, but I don't know if that's true or not.

 

[Chronodiver Lokii]

I've heard the cold water thing as well. I'll have to try it
I think i'm just going to chop my hair. i havent had it short since high school, so im gonna change it up and get rid of all the unhealthy bits of hair

 

[Lythium]

If your hair is really suffering, chopping it may be the best way to go.

That reminds me, I need a haircut so bad, haha.

 

[Terywj [태리]]

Pretty sure I failed first exam of my Behavioral Neuroscience. Fuuu.

 

[Froggy]

Can't find my cell phone and for the first time in forever it's turned off.

So apparently for that friend I mentioned before, it's not 125$ for that perfume set, it's 90$. But even so sending her that money still leaves a bad taste in my mouth. I told her I'd get back to her after the weekend, but I think my ultimate answer is going to be that it's too costly for me to pay for, from which of course she'll be upset. But if that's all it takes to get in the way of our friendship then it was probably never that great of a relationship to begin with.

 

[global-wolf]

Lokii, if you want to keep your hair long, just trim it. In any case you should definitely cut it if there's a lot of split ends. Split and kinky ends tend to find ways to tangle with each other because they've been in that position for so long, so cutting them will usually let you sort things out. Also when you brush your hair do it very gently and start from the ends, your hair is elastic and if you break it by pulling it, the broken/stretched areas will scrunch up (you can try this) and you might get a split end. I don't do this next part, but some people say that brushing your hair when it's wet is bad because it's weaker and more likely to break, so if you want to try avoiding that you can brush your hair in the shower when it's slick with conditioner and easy to brush.

 

[Chronodiver Lokii]

Exactly, Froggy
Money and friendship shouldn't be one in the same

Thanks Globie
I just have really thick hair that is hard to manage after a while
Gonna get it chopped anyway while it's still snowboard season
I have my hair braided right now, but id love to just have my hair all safe in my hat xD

 

[PsychoIncarnate]

There is a picture I want to take that I think sums up the place where I live pretty well. But I never have a camera when I'm in the area.

A bike rack at a bus center thing. There is a wheel with a bike lock...JUST the wheel.

Apparently the crook couldn't get the lock off the wheel, so he just took the wheel off the bike.

Edit: Also, don't add girls you like but reject you onto facebook. Or at least after they reject you it's probably better to delete them off it.

 

[Yonder]

I lost my iPod Nano that I had for the last 4 years...left it in the change room at the gym. I called lost and found there and they didn't have it...I even bussed back to the place 3 hours later after realizing it wasn't in my bag. It was gone...

I'm pretty miserable right now. I'm pretty poor so a $100 iPod was in my top 3 most valuable possessions. All the places I've taken it and all the music it had, lots of sentimental value too. Well, I got it when for the first time in the first 15 years of my life that I actually won something worth more than $5 in a draw. Was the first time I actually had a decent stroke of luck and I lose it, how ironic...

Either way, now I suppose I have to scrounge up money for a new one or something affordable. *Sigh* fml.

 

[Jon Farron]

I have to push carts today, and it's 80% chance of rain.

yay~

 

[Vashimus]

There is a picture I want to take that I think sums up the place where I live pretty well. But I never have a camera when I'm in the area.

A bike rack at a bus center thing. There is a wheel with a bike lock...JUST the wheel.

Apparently the crook couldn't get the lock off the wheel, so he just took the wheel off the bike.

Edit: Also, don't add girls you like but reject you onto facebook. Or at least after they reject you it's probably better to delete them off it.

I've seen that crap all the time. Not really a swift getaway if you gotta one-wheeled bike though. Lol

Yeah, don't mind girls that reject you. She's got other options to choose from, so should you (or at least, make it seem like you do).

 

[Lore]

That reminds me. My bike got stolen last week.

 

[PsychoIncarnate]

I'm watching the twilight zone.

A guy dies and ends up in some kind of purgatory where he gets any wish he wants.

What's the first thing he wishes for? A million dollars...

What use is currency where wishes can be granted at a whim, and he's the only person there? Why would he have any need to spend it? How much would currency be worth in a system where you could have as much as you wanted anyway? Infinitesimally small, I can assure you that.

I don't get it, does he just want to look at it?

The sad thing is, I bet people IRL would do the exact same thing

 

[Chronodiver Lokii]

I'm in a vicious cycle thats gonna cause me to pull yet another all nighter before my monday morning class

I'm in a 3D intensive major, as I've stated a bunch of times. I really want to get good at 3D. Well, I did before anyway.
Everytime I have to turn in an assignment, i freak out. Freaking out makes me lose concentration. That makes me panic even more, which causes me to lose even more concentration. At this point, I'm just afraid of 3D and don't know what to do and it really sucks. I just have anxiety attacks and tense up and start shaking and crying for no reason, which is even more scary.

It's so confusing and I don't know whats wrong and I just want to sleep and not do homework but I need to get good grades to keep my scholarships and so that i dont disappoint my parents and so that i can improve at what i want to do.

But i cant
because i cant concentrate or do my work. i get all my work in on time but its a major struggle and im just running myself ragged.

This isnt even a difficult assignment
I'm just psyching myself out

im worrying myself physically sick and I have no idea why. its ****ing scary.

and im just word vomitting at a friend right now......shes calming me down a lot though.....and i feel bad and stuff....

gah i just need to draw and sleep.....

 

[Vashimus]

I'm watching the twilight zone.

A guy dies and ends up in some kind of purgatory where he gets any wish he wants.

What's the first thing he wishes for? A million dollars...

What use is currency where wishes can be granted at a whim, and he's the only person there? Why would he have any need to spend it? How much would currency be worth in a system where you could have as much as you wanted anyway? Infinitesimally small, I can assure you that.

I don't get it, does he just want to look at it?

The sad thing is, I bet people IRL would do the exact same thing

Wait, he DIES? What's the point of giving him the wish then? So he can wish his family that he left behind a million dollars?

If was alive and was given one wish, I would've wished for the ability to be right when I choose to be. If everything I said was true ALL THE TIME, I might f*ck something up big time from a slip of the tongue.

 

[PsychoIncarnate]

He had no family. He was an immortal *******, a thief and a murderer.

He was dead and in some place he believed to be heaven. He had the ability to wish for anything he wanted for all eternity.

It turned out to be hell. He eventually realized how useless money was. Another of his wishes was for a casino where he never loses. And he tired of that as well.

 

[Jon Farron]

Ugh, I'm aching all over.

I'm never ever doing carts again. To make it worse, the guy that was "helping" me kept disappearing and I ended up doing most of the work. -.-

 

[Master Xanthan]

Ugh, I'm aching all over.

I'm never ever doing carts again. To make it worse, the guy that was "helping" me kept disappearing and I ended up doing most of the work. -.-

I actually loved doing carts back when I worked at a grocery store. Though my legs were pretty tired out the first few weeks. I think the best thing was not having to deal with customers.

 

[PsychoIncarnate]

I don't mind doing it in the summer

 

[Saux]

man sometimes dealing with customers is just a treat though. You get to mean a pretty radical range of personalities doin that shiz

 

[Jon Farron]

I actually like dealing with the "Guests", it's always entertaining.

One older couple waited in line for 10 minutes while we were trying to figure out why the system didn't prompt a $5 giftcard for buying a certain combo of items that were in the ad. In the end (when we were just about to give them a $5 bill), they gave up and started ranting on how we were the worst store on the planet and they were gonna go to the other one and blah blah blah. -.-

Then like a couple hours later someone bought the exact items they were buying, and when the $5 card didn't prompt again she said not to worry about it because it was just $5. I laughed and she was like what? I then explained to her what happened earlier and she was laughing and like "wow it's just $5 people!"




Oh, and there was another guy that was wearing this shirt:

He had blue hair, piercings, tattoos, etc.
I asked him why he thought that, and these were his exact words: "Look, I don't wanna be challenged right now, ok?" me: "then why are you wearing that shirt? O.o" Him: *insert angry look, quick payment, and storming off like a teenage girl here*

The teen couple behind him just started laughing and were like omg fail. It was pretty pathetic. xD

 

[Chronodiver Lokii]

Bad religion is a band :I;;; I'm assuming he wore the shirt because he enjoys the band xD;;;

And also seems to fit somewhere in the punk subculture somewhere

---

Roommate won't stop raging at league of legends
I should have never shown him the Mac pbe u___u I told him to stop yelling but idk how long it'll last