SSBM: Academy of smash (Wow! It's updated!)

[Pokemasterkatie]

Well NESSBOUNDER, about the Earthbound thing, most of us that had a Super Nintendo in our youth (like yours truly) had never heard of Earthbound until SSB. I don't think it was on the Major Video shelves when I rented the SNES games. At least, that's my opinion. Then there's Pokemon. It came out when I was 10 and really liked it , so I stuck with it. So did a lot of others. Unfortunately, there are only a good handful of Poke-Fans in the U.S. now, due to my second favorite Anime: Yu-Gi-Oh!
By the way, good update! I agree w/ 2quick4U, Doc Mario needs a good cameo! (and another funny remark!)

 

[Yoshi]

... it's humorious yes, and qiote enjoying. For the most part, I like it thus far, good plot, and theme. (Duh, it's on SSB:M) Anyways, I hope to read this good stuff again.

PS: Anyone wanta read someting squite simular, but more violent, check out my fic, SSBM Highschool

~~Geoff

 

[chan]

Yoshi, i doubt NESSBOUNDER likes u advertising on his board.

Oh and im a hardcore EB fan, but i cant bid high enough on that english prototype EB0 cart for the snes oh well...maybe i can find a ROM or something...i THINK it was dumped...

btw...i DESPISE pokemon so if u dont want to see me in "angry super-saiya-daiya-caiya-annoying chan-san", i suggest u stop sing the pokemon theme song (2quick4u) and STOP TALKING ABOUT POKEMON EXCEPT NESSBOUNDER CAUSE ITS IN HIS FIC. Thank you. All DDR,EB,EB0, and SSBM fans proceed.

 

[KingMewtwo1112]

Wow, Yoshi's here, never expected that. BTW, good update.

 

[Bahful]

LOL

"Kirby: we got a bit tired of eyeballing Captain Falcon’s beezumph. So we split"

Another killer line. This is a hilarious story NESSBOUNDER, but not only is it funny, but it's also storing a good deal of potential sub-plots as well. Fox seems to have a lot of angst locked up inside him and there's some sexual tension between him and Zelda, this can really go somewhere.

Btw, I've played Earthbound quite a while ago, but I do remember it was a great game. Possibly one of the SNES' best; too bad it didn't receive as much recognition as it should have.

 

[NESSBOUNDER]

COOL! I HAVE NEW READERS! Welcome, Yoshi. I don't mind you advertizing on my thread because I advertize on other people's threads too.

CHAPTER @: PART @$

BEEP, BEEP, BEEP, BEEP!
The alarm rang through every dorm in the academy. Ness screamed and sat bolt upright in his bed. The little red light above his door was blinking like crazy. Master hand obviously had something important to say. Especially if he was ringing the alarm at 5:30 in the morning.

Ness rubbed his eyes and sheepishly got changed. He walked out of his dorm to see the corridors full of smashers with large bags under their eyes.

Marth: oooh, what could that hand want at this time of the morning…

Roy came running down the passageway and careered into the startled prince. Marth said something very rude in Japanese.

Roy: aaah! Ahhh! Fire! Fire!

Marth: there’s no fire, you idiot! It’s just Master hand with one of his stupid sermons…

Yoshi: I find Master hand’s speeches very interesting and encapsulating.

Marth: really? I find YOU annoying!

Ness ignored them and walked in the direction of Mr. Game and Watch’s crack in the wall. He saw lots of pajama-clad smashers and was even fortunate enough to witness the Ice Climbers in casual gear.

Mr. Game and Watch was standing outside his dorm, looking very confused.

Ness: hey, do you have any idea what’s going on?

G&W: not a sausage…but Jigglypuff says Mewtwo had to go to see Peach at 2:00 this morning!

Ness: I wander why…

G&W: let’s go see Fox, mabe he knows.

The two raced off to the Starfox dorm. The door wasn’t locked, so Fox and Falco where still inside.

Ness cautiously opened the door of the dorm to find Fox lying in his bed with a pillow pulled over both ears. Falco wasn’t even awake, despite the horrible noise.

Ness: hey, Fox, what’s happening?

Fox opened one eye to see who it was, then took the pillow off his head and sat up, rubbing his eyes.
He was wearing boxers with the Starfox symbol on them. Ness also noted that he didn’t sleep with a blanket.

Ness: do you have any idea why the alarm is ringing so early in the morning.

Fox: no…but I wish it wouldn’t…*

The Arwing pilot stretched and yawned. Ness saw the muscles on Fox’s generously built upper body and began to wish he could do something about the puppy fat on HIS torso.

Ness: …come on! Let’s go see what the problem is…(whispers) I’m not all THAT fat…

Fox: yeah, yeah…just let me get changed first.

Fox quickly nipped into the bathroom and came out minutes later with a towel wrapped around his waist. His fur was wet, and he was dripping on the carpet. There was steam billowing from the bathroom door.

Fox: forgot my clothes…(grabs uniform off his bed)

Fox went back into the bathroom and closed the door. Ness listened to the sound of the hair dryer and thought of how much trouble it must be to have fur.

After about another minute or so, Fox emerged from the bathroom in his uniform, he was still holding the grooming brush.
Fox put the brush down and grabbed his helmet from a shelf next to his bed. He put it on. Next he got his bagpipes and woke Falco, who swore and simply got into his uniform without bothering to shower.

Folco: I’ll have one later. Don’t you EVER wake me like that again!

Fox: how else can I wake you? That’s the only sound you can hear when you’re dead.

Falco: very funny.

Falco stormed out of the door, shoving Ness aside.

Fox: grumpy, grumpy grumpy!!

Falco: shut your face!

* * *

Meanwhile, Mewtwo was sitting in a cushy pink chair in Peach’s office. (yes, she has an office all to herself) The only colour apparent in the room was pink. Peach blended perfectly into her surroundings like a chameleon.

Peach: Mewtwo. As a Psychic Pokemon, you should be able to read people’s minds, no?

Mewtwo: actually, I cannot read people’s minds in the sense you are referring to, but I can tap into their mental thoughts and predict the flow of their mind’s pattern, allowing me to acquire their thinking state and share their thoughts.

Peach: I don’t know what you mean, but that’ll do. Listen…a pair of my most prized undergarments have gone missing. I suspect that someone has stolen them. A mushroom-print knickers and bra set. I’ll show you a picture…

Peach ruffled through some photos and pulled out a very seductive picture of herself wearing only a mushroom-print bra and knickers and posing with one of her legs tucked behind her ear.

Mewtwo: sick humans…

Peach: pardon?

Mewtwo: nothing, I was just mumbling to myself…

Peach: right. Now I’m going to get all the smashers here in the great hall soon, and I want you to scan their minds. The culprit should know what they look like. Apart from me, you, and the thief, no-one has ever seen them before.

Mewtwo: I get it.

Peach: expose the thief and you’ll also get 500 points for your team.

Mewtwo: … … … …

Peach: well?

Mewtwo: I’ll be with you in a minute, I have to go into my dorm to meditate first.

Peach: be quick about it!

* * *

Everyone was gathered in the great hall, wondering what this was all about.
Peach stood up on a little platform looking very stern.

Peach: I’m not into big, long speeches like the Master hand is, so I’ll get to the point. One of you miserable sickoes has stolen my mushroom-print lingerie and I intend to find out who it is!

Mario and Luigi: MUSHROOM PRINT LINGERIE??

Peach: shattap! It could be any of you!

There was a lot of mumbling in the crowd.

Peach: where the heck is my lie detector?

Mewtwo: I’m here! I’m here…sorry about the delay…

Mewtwo pushed and shoved his way through the mass of smashers to get to the little platform thingie and stand next to Peach.

Peach: Mewtwo is going to use his psychic powers to find out who has stolen them. The insolent shmuck who would stoop so low as to steal my precious panties will have their bum beaten off their hips by my team of trained Cruel Melee wireframes.

She clicked her fingers and a bunch of wireframes came walking in. They looked ready to rumble.

Peach: Mewtwo! Get to work.

The psychic Pokemon began to float menacingly from smasher to smasher, staring deep into the suspect’s eyes. Peach was disappointed when Mewtwo silently passed Zelda, Fox and Captain Falcon.

Mewtwo stopped at Bowser. The Koopa looked him in the eye and raised one of his fiery eyebrows.

Mewtwo suddenly thrust his hand in the air and shouted (thought shouted) “FOUND”

Bowser: WHAT? ARE YOU CRAZY?

Peach: Bowser? I should have known!

Bowser: wait! I’ve been framed! I never stole your things!!

Mewtwo: then how do you explain THIS, fool?

Before Bowser could answer, Mewtwo had reached behind him and produced a fine pair of underwear that was impaled on one of Bowser’s spikes.

Bowser: ??!!??!?

Peach: that settles it, Bowser…you are a pervert and a cross-dresser and I entitle you to a darn good slapping!

With her command, the Cruel Melee wireframes proceeded to whup Bowser’s scaly hide around like a volley ball.

As Peach cackled with glee at having so much power, a hand shot up in the back of the crowd.

Peach: wot?

Y. Link: this doesn’t seem right, why would Bowser want to wear your lingerie on his spikes?

Peach: hmm…I do suppose it is a bit strange…

Y. Link: and what about Mewtwo? You haven’t checked him!

Mewtwo: ! What are you saying? Are you accusing ME of stealing Peach’s things?

Peach: you stay right there, Mewtwo. I’m not done with you…Ness. Can you read minds?

Ness: yep! And I can dispel mental blocks with ease.

Mewtwo: gulp…

Peach: good. Now perhaps you can give Mewtwo a catscan?

Mewtwo: O.K. O.K…I admit…I stole Peach’s mushroom-print lingerie. I liked the colour of them so I …

Peach: I can’t believe it…but…WHAT WHERE YOU DOING IN MY OFFICE?!

Mewtwo: I was trying to teleport to the Cafeteria from my dormitory, but I miscalculated and ended up there instead…

Peach: well that was stupid of you! You’ll just have to try not to get it wrong next time.

She clicked her fingers and the wireframes stopped beating up on Bowser (who wasn’t looking too good) and turnet their attentions to Mewtwo. He cringed and braced himself for the impact.

Suddenly a little voice squeaked up at the back.

Pichu: STOOOP! IT’S NOT MEWTWO’S FAULT! IT WAS ME!

Peach: what do you mean?

Pichu: I promised Mewtwo a berserk gene if he stole your undies for me.

Peach: why would Pichu want my underwear?

Pichu: um…because they’re soft and they make a great bed!

Peach looked over at Mewtwo, who was pinned into a corner by the gang of wireframes.

Mewtwo: uuh, yes! That is exactly what happened! How could I resist a berserk gene? I love those things more than myself!

Pichu: he, er, I, um, sort of hypnotized him by waving it in fwunt of his nose…

Mewtwo: uh, um, oh yes! I wondered what I was doing all that time!

Pichu: so Mewtwo is weally innocent and I’m evil and desewve to be punished most severely!

Peach: WIREFRAMES! Apprehend that rodent!

The wireframes formed a circle around Pichu and began to raise their legs.

Pichu: WHEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE! (bam, splat, pow, crack, slam, bash, whack, slap, crunch, wham, boof, whoop, etc. etc. etc.)

Most of the smashers stayed behind to watch Pichu having the daylights beaten out of him. Ness and Fox began to head back to their dorms.

Fox: I think Pichu was pretending to be guilty…

Ness: yeah…well pertinence is good sometimes…I really can’t read minds. hehe…

 

[MewtwoMaster2002]

Pichu: STOOOP! IT’S NOT MEWTWO’S FAULT! IT WAS ME!

Peach: what do you mean?

Pichu: I promised Mewtwo a berserk gene if he stole your undies for me.

Peach: why would Pichu want my underwear?

Pichu: um…because they’re soft and they make a great bed!

Peach looked over at Mewtwo, who was pinned into a corner by the gang of wireframes.

Mewtwo: uuh, yes! That is exactly what happened! How could I resist a berserk gene? I love those things more than myself!

Pichu: he, er, I, um, sort of hypnotized him by waving it in fwunt of his nose…

Mewtwo: uh, um, oh yes! I wondered what I was doing all that time!

Pichu: so Mewtwo is weally innocent and I’m evil and desewve to be punished most severely!

Peach: WIREFRAMES! Apprehend that rodent!

The wireframes formed a circle around Pichu and began to raise their legs.

Pichu: WHEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE! (bam, splat, pow, crack, slam, bash, whack, slap, crunch, wham, boof, whoop, etc. etc. etc.)

LOL that was funny. Keep up the good work.

 

[PsiFlameMaster]

bcuz this was such a funny chapter, im just gonna quote, it was so funny!

Peach: Mewtwo. As a Psychic Pokemon, you should be able to read people’s minds, no?

Mewtwo: actually, I cannot read people’s minds in the sense you are referring to, but I can tap into their mental thoughts and predict the flow of their mind’s pattern, allowing me to acquire their thinking state and share their thoughts.

Peach: I don’t know what you mean, but that’ll do. Listen…a pair of my most prized undergarments have gone missing. I suspect that someone has stolen them. A mushroom-print knickers and bra set. I’ll show you a picture…

Peach ruffled through some photos and pulled out a very seductive picture of herself wearing only a mushroom-print bra and knickers and posing with one of her legs tucked behind her ear.

Mewtwo: sick humans…

Peach: pardon?

Mewtwo: nothing, I was just mumbling to myself…

Ness cautiously opened the door of the dorm to find Fox lying in his bed with a pillow pulled over both ears. Falco wasn’t even awake, despite the horrible noise.

Ness: hey, Fox, what’s happening?

Fox opened one eye to see who it was, then took the pillow off his head and sat up, rubbing his eyes.
He was wearing boxers with the Starfox symbol on them. Ness also noted that he didn’t sleep with a blanket.

Ness: do you have any idea why the alarm is ringing so early in the morning.

Fox: no…but I wish it wouldn’t…*

The Arwing pilot stretched and yawned. Ness saw the muscles on Fox’s generously built upper body and began to wish he could do something about the puppy fat on HIS torso.

Ness: …come on! Let’s go see what the problem is…(whispers) I’m not all THAT fat…

Fox: yeah, yeah…just let me get changed first.

Everyone was gathered in the great hall, wondering what this was all about.
Peach stood up on a little platform looking very stern.

Peach: I’m not into big, long speeches like the Master hand is, so I’ll get to the point. One of you miserable sickoes has stolen my mushroom-print lingerie and I intend to find out who it is!

Mario and Luigi: MUSHROOM PRINT LINGERIE??

Peach: shattap! It could be any of you!

There was a lot of mumbling in the crowd.

Peach: where the heck is my lie detector?

Mewtwo: I’m here! I’m here…sorry about the delay…

Mewtwo pushed and shoved his way through the mass of smashers to get to the little platform thingie and stand next to Peach.

Peach: Mewtwo is going to use his psychic powers to find out who has stolen them. The insolent shmuck who would stoop so low as to steal my precious panties will have their bum beaten off their hips by my team of trained Cruel Melee wireframes.

She clicked her fingers and a bunch of wireframes came walking in. They looked ready to rumble.

Peach: Mewtwo! Get to work.

The psychic Pokemon began to float menacingly from smasher to smasher, staring deep into the suspect’s eyes. Peach was disappointed when Mewtwo silently passed Zelda, Fox and Captain Falcon.

Mewtwo stopped at Bowser. The Koopa looked him in the eye and raised one of his fiery eyebrows.

Mewtwo suddenly thrust his hand in the air and shouted (thought shouted) “FOUND”

Bowser: WHAT? ARE YOU CRAZY?

Peach: Bowser? I should have known!

Bowser: wait! I’ve been framed! I never stole your things!!

Mewtwo: then how do you explain THIS, fool?

Before Bowser could answer, Mewtwo had reached behind him and produced a fine pair of underwear that was impaled on one of Bowser’s spikes.

Bowser: ??!!??!?

Peach: that settles it, Bowser…you are a pervert and a cross-dresser and I entitle you to a darn good slapping!

With her command, the Cruel Melee wireframes proceeded to whup Bowser’s scaly hide around like a volley ball.

As Peach cackled with glee at having so much power, a hand shot up in the back of the crowd.

hehehe... ROTFLMAO x 10:

 

[DarkLink567]

great update.
how obvious of Pichu to take the blame.

 

[NESSBOUNDER]

CHAPTER 2: PART 24

Jigglypuff was sitting in the Cafeteria, waiting for the rest of her teammates to arrive.
She stared at the big plate of baby food in front of her.

Jigglypuff: (thinks) hmmm, if only I could chew my food…then I wouldn’t have to eat this slop. I hate pear…

Apart from her, The Swordsmen where the only complete team there. Zelda was in the corner, along with Gannondorf, (sitting quite far apart, mind) but their teams didn’t seem to be up yet.

Young Link was obviously starting to get bored. He was throwing up bits of toast and shooting them with his arrows. Jigglypuff dodgen another impaled toast and decided that where she was sitting was not the safest spot.

As she got up to leave, Young Link tossed up another slice of toast, but before he could shoot it Roy jumped up and slayed the unfortunate toast in half.

Y. Link: HAY! I WAS ABOUT TO HIT THAT!

Roy: so? You’re making a mess of the place, and my sword is cooler than your bow!

Y. Link: take back those words, savage!

Roy: no, I don’t want them!

The two swordsmen stared each other down, hands on their hilts.
Link and Marth simple gave them a wide berth and watched.

Suddenly, Young link leaped up onto the table and grabbed a half-buttered toast of his plate.

Y. Link: eat this, jerko!

Young Link threw the toast like a ninja star, Roy did a beautiful matrix dodge and retorted with a hand full of baked beans. They splattered all over Young Link’s face.

Y. Link: AAAAAAARGH! (falls of table)

Roy: you’re a** is MINE! (grabs a wienie of Zelda’s dish and goes in for the kill)

Young link kicked Roy away from him and got up quickly, he seized a soft-boiled egg and hurled it at his attacker. Roy screamed and fell back, runny egg yolk splattered all over his armor.

Just as Roy was about go get up and counter-attack, Zelda came up behind him and smooshed a hash brown through his hair.

Zelda: HOW DARE YOU STEAL MY WEENIE!

Roy turned around and flubbed her across her face with the aforementioned greasy snack. She fell over onto the table, breaking it in two.

Young link hurled a ketchup bottle at Roy’s back. But the fighter dodged quickly and took cover behind a table.

Grasping a hamburger, Young Link proceeded to rapidly toss tomato and meat patties at his opponent. Roy rolled and jump to avoid the rain of munchies being thrown at him.

When Young Link ran out of ammo, Roy jumped up and bombed him with a big dollop of mashed potatoes and peas. Staggering back from the impact of this vicious attack, Young Link was assaulted by Zelda, who bashed him across the head with a celery stick. Young Link grabbed a handful of the nearest food (a sticky, unidentifiable mound of pulp dripping down the leg of a chair) and tossed it at the princess. She dodged and the food went over her shoulder, hitting Link in the face with the force of a bird crashing into a window.

Link: AAARGH! You’ll pay for that! (pulls Marth’s hair in frustration)

Marth: OUCHIE! (throws his chips at Link)

The Cafeteria was now a scene of absolute chaos. Jigglypuff was taking cover under a table as the breakfast flew thick and fast.

Suddenly, an apple pie descended from above. Jigglypuff squealed and ran for her life as it crushed her shelter like a peanut.

Jigglypuff clasped the bowl of baby food close to her for comfort. Marth came running up to her, pursued by Zelda.
Jigglypuff panicked and jumped up onto a table, Marth turned at that last moment to block Zelda’s fennel with his bacon rind. Jigglypuff was scared, so she rammed the bowl of baby food over Marth’s head. Splat.

Meanwhile, Fox, Ness, Mr. Game and Watch, and a bunch of others were innocently making their way to the Cafeteria.
Fox was the first one to open the door. Upon hearing the cries of “incoming Brussels sprout!” and seeing the green object hurtling towards him like a cannonball, he instinctively put up his reflector shield, propelling the projectile back at the one who threw it, (Link) so it bashed him in his face very hard.

Ness: FOOOOOOOOOOOOOOD FIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIGHT! AAAAAAAAAH!

In no time at all everyone had joined in the titanic food fight. Bits of breakfast flew in every direction, the walls were plastered with a thick food paste.
The battle lasted approximately ten minutes, before Peach and her little swat team came and “settled” the argument with a bunch of very hard kicks and punches.
After this, the Cafeteria was made out of bounds, Young Link was slapped around a bit, and food would be served directly to the dorms from now on.

Dr. Mario: so? Who needs de Cafeteria! I have an amazing and mysterious way to go without.

Kirby: what, cold turkey?

Dr. Mario: no, TAKEAWAY!

All: DOI!

G&W: what a pity, the cafeteria was such a fun place…

Ness: It’s not all bad…there’s still one room in the Academy that no-one’s ever been in before.

G&W: huh? What one?

Ness: the bar! Hardly anyone knows about the bar. It’s just under the boiler room. Not even some of the wireframes know it’s there.

G&W: cool! Let’s go there!

Ness: yeah! It could be pretty sweet…

The two teammates rushed off to find the bar, Mr. Game and Watch ticking as he ran, and Ness huffing and puffing to keep up with him.
They where going to be the first ones to discover a new place to hang out.

 

[MewtwoMaster2002]

If there is still a smash spirit loose then it is in the bar (I guess). Nice chapter and food fight.

 

[PsiFlameMaster]

the last one left is time, right? also:

Jigglypuff was sitting in the Cafeteria, waiting for the rest of her teammates to arrive.
She stared at the big plate of baby food in front of her.

Jigglypuff: (thinks) hmmm, if only I could chew my food…then I wouldn’t have to eat this slop. I hate pear…

hehehe... poor puff. great food fight! the "bar" huh? isnt Ness underage? hehehe...

Ness (after having been at the bar 4 an hour or so): i Am NoT UnDeRaGe! *hiccup* iLl GeT yOu! *runz into wall* do'h!

 

[DarkLink567]

That was some food fight. Poor Jigglypuff.

 

[2quick4U]

Fox was the only one who stood a chance

 

[Verde Coeden Scalesworth]

After reading this from beginning to "end", I must say, this is very hilarious.

As a more serious fanfic, I can't say it falls in that area, but as for more of a fun fic, it's well done.

Oh, and no, I'm not trying to act all snotty. I'm just stating my opinion.

Also, it sounded like some "new" smashers were coming...guess not? The Falcon Bum part was hilarious! Then again, Peach probably wants a piece of that...whoops sorry, was thinking of another fic.(SSBM Reality Fanfic)

 

[NESSBOUNDER]

IMPORTANT!
from now on, I will only be able to update on the weekends and on holidays because of school…awwwww!
CHAPTER 2: PART25

Mr. Game and Watch stopped at a forked hallway. He waited for Ness to catch up to him before speaking.

G&W: where do we go now?

Ness: (puff) left (puff) then right (puff) and then left again(wheeze)

G&W: cool, let’s go!

Ness: (gasp) wait! (coff) there is only (gasp) one more spirit (bleah) left…(pant) I think we should get Fox and Jigglypuff (hoogie) just in case we run into it…(huff)

G&W: I don’t! If we do run into another Smash spirit I’m sure we could handle it together, right?

Ness: yeah…(whoof) I just needed a break (fff) from running. (phew)

G&W: fine, let’s walk then.

Fox: and where are you two off to?

G&W: aaaaaaagh! Fox! We thought you where back in your dorm!

Jigglypuff: we saw you guys looking rather dodgy and decided to follow you!

Ness: (points to Zelda) what is she doing here?

Fox: oh, uuum…I, er, I have no idea! Stop following me!

Zelda: oh Fox, I Just want to hang out with you…and them…and maybe get to know you…all…better! Can’t I be your friend?

Fox: No! You’re starting to creep me out! You’ve been stalking me all morning!

Zelda: uh…I’m not stalking you, I’m following you around…can I stroke your tail? I think you’re sooo cute…I’ve always wanted to talk to an animal.

Fox: GO AWAY! I’LL BITE YOU!

Zelda: oh, don’t be like that…I have a question…

Fox: what?

Zelda: is this nice?

Before Fox could move, Zelda reached down and tickled himjust above the base of his tail.

Fox: gaaah! (falls to his knees)

Zelda: oooh, look! He loves that!

Ness: I think you badly need a pet…

G&W: hehehehehehehehee!

Zelda applied a little magic to the tip of her finger for the last three scratches, then withdrew her hand. Fox was lying on the ground with a goofy expression on his face, and he was drooling out of the corner of his mouth.

Zelda: I wonder what that feels like…I wish I had a tail.

She turned and walked down the hallway.

Ness: you all right, Fox?

Fox: mmmrggh…oooh man…aauuh…

G&W: heheheheehehehehee!

Fox: what are you laughing at, flatworm? Get over here and help me to my feet!

Fox’s legs seemed to be made of jelly, Ness had to hold him up before he could walk.

Ness: I think Zelda likes you…

Fox: no duh…Just the thought of that makes me sick! Why does she like me?

Ness: I suppose she’s an animal lover, which means that she has a “thing” for, uh, unevolved animals, and, um, you’re, like, half humanoid, um, so she, uh, I suppose she thinks you’re er, handsome or cute or something…Aaarh! I don’t know!

G&W: anyone would think you LIKED having your sensitive spot scratched by Zelda…hehe!

Fox: well I…I…uh…WELL FOR CRYING OUT LOUD! IT FEELS NICE AND ALL, BUT I CAN’T EVEN WALK PROPERLY AFTERWARDS!

Jigglypuff: I wonder if Pokemon have sensitive spots…

Ness: let’s find out. (scratches Jigglypuff between her ears)

Jigglypuff: eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee! (goes all pink)

Ness: yup, it’s a dense nerve cluster at the base of any moveable appendage.

Fox: hmpf, smartypants.

It didn’t take to long to find the bar, but when they did get there, an interesting revelation dawned upon them all.

NOTE: those of you who haven’t played EarthBound will probably have no idea what happens next, but it doesn’t matter. But those of you who have played the game will probably understand what will happen next, muahahahahaaa!

Ness stared at the dingy bar. There was something sickeningly familiar about it. A jukebox in the corner, a counter, two tables, complete silence.
He felt like he had once been in this exact spot before. And he knew exactly what it reminded him of. A chill ran down his spine.

Fox: whoa! This place is dusty! I reckon we should clean it up…

Ness: none of you do or touch ANYTHING! I want to confirm some thing first…

Fox and the others did as they where told, Ness slowly began walking slowly towards the counter, his heart racing inside his chest.

Behind the counter was a wall…with bottles on it.
Ness reached out to touch the wall, then withdrew his hand in fear…he couldn’t do this, not again, but he had to.
The little boy summoned up all his courage and checked the wall.

?





??







???




FLAMM! Ness’s mind and body melted away from reality as his whole world turned white. He could hear nothing, he could see nothing, he tried to scream, but no sound came out.
Ness slowly lapsed into unconsciousness.
He knew what was next.

 

[MewtwoMaster2002]

Nice update. What's going to happen to Ness?

 

[NESSBOUNDER]

CHAPTER 2: PART 26

Ness slowly got to his feet, he felt groggy and tired, and scared.
He looked up at the wall. It was black, pitch black, but its outlines glowed a bright neon pink.
Ness quickly turned around. The whole bar was black with neon outlines, as if the floor wasn’t there, but its outlines where. Jigglypuff and Fox where standing there, completely oblivious to the whole thing. There was no sign of Mr. Game and Watch.

Ness: Fox! I’m still in the Academy of Smash, am I?

Fox: Academy of what? This is the Academy of Moon.

Ness: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHH!

Jigglypuff: do you like moons?

Ness: um…er…no…

Jigglypuff: you like moons? Me too! Blue moons, new moons, true moons…

Fox: moon, moon, moon…

Ness: no! This can’t be happening! I destroyed the Mani-Mani statue! I defeated it back on Fourside!

Fox: Fourside? You mean Moonside…

Ness: shut up! Shut up! You’re not real!

Fox: I like real…

Ness ran outside, the hallway was black with neon outline, in fact, the whole place was coloured like that.
A female wireframe was walking past, humming as she swept up some glowing dust from the floor.

Ness: excuse me…

Wireframe: NESS’S HP DROPS TO ZERO!

Ness: AAAGH! (checks HP to find it full) Oh phew…

Suddenly, Luigi came walking down the hallway, swinging a parasol.

Luigi: did you hear? The man with the red cap who looks like me but isn’t me because I’m me and he’s he knows some really cool stuff…do you want hint?

Ness: uum…no

Luigi: O.K, I’ll tell you…go and see the man in the red cap who looks like me but isn’t me because I’m me and he’s he because he knows something special.

Ness: thanks.

Luigi: no prob.

Ness: right, so I have to find Mario…

Ness wandered down around the Academy searching for Mario, until he came across Roy standing in the doorway to his dorm.

Ness: can I go through? I want to get to my dorm.

Roy: I’ll never let you through, never, because you aren’t with a guy who has pink hair and a plastic nose.

Ness: oh no…this is just like it was in Fourside. I have to find Mario first, I suppose.

Ness wandered around some more, and came across Yoshi, who was standing next to a big, abstract picture.

Yoshi: can you guess who’s painted on this canvass?

Ness: no

Yoshi: go on then, tell me!

Ness: I mean, yes…

Yoshi: oh, it’s very simple…the answer is…your shirt! My shirt! M Sh r T Y r T!

Ness: big help you are…

The abstract painting suddenly growled and lunged forward! Ness screamed and whipped out his bat.

Ness is attacking! BAM! 134 damage off Abstract Art.

Abstract Art charged forward! BOOOM! 111 damage off Ness

Ness tried PSI SPORT a! 99 damage off abstract art.

Abstract Art is attacking! Just missed.

Ness is attacking! SMAAAAAAAAAASH! 358 damage off Abstract Art.

Abstract Art was destroyed.

Ness tucked away his bat as the artwork exploded into a thousand shreds of canvass.

Ness: whoa! I can use all my PSI abilities in here! That makes things a lot easier…

Turning around, Ness came face to face with Mario.

Ness: Mario!

Mario: I am not Mario! I am the man in the red cap who looks like the man in the green cap but I’m not the man in the green cap because he me and I am he.
Hello, and goodbye…shall I?

Ness: no

There was a whooshing sound and Ness found himself in a small field with Marth and Captain Falcon. He walked over to Marth.

Marth: do you want a Super Bomb?

Ness: no

Marth: here you go. (Ness got the Super Bomb)

Ness tucked the Super Bomb into his backpack and went to talk to Captain Falcon.

C. Falcon: hello, and goodbye!

WHOOOOSH!

Ness was now in an elevator with Falco. He remembered something and walked to the back of the elevator. There he could faintly make out the black silhouette of a man.

???: you can’t see me, can you?

Ness’s heart pounded faster.

Ness: no!

???: wow! You can see me? well done.

Ness quickly turned to Falco.

Falco: hello, and goodbye!

WHOOSH!

Ness found himself lying on a bed in the hospital wing. He got off and began walking towards the door, when a voice echoed from behind him.

???: hello! You can’t see me, can you? I thought you seemed interesting, so I decided to follow you.

Ness: oh yesss!

???: he he he! you still can’t see me. Look at my hair! It’s bright pink…

Ness shot out of the hospital wing as fast as his legs could carry him, he turned a corner and headed towards the dorms.

???: look at my nose, isn’t it cool? It’s made of plastic!

It didn’t take Ness long to get back to Roy. Roy took one look at him and jumped.

Roy: you’re the guy with pink hair and a plastic nose! Cool! Come on, let’s ditch this kid and get a drink.

Roy ran off down the passageway, leaving the dormitory door wide open. Ness cautiously walked inside.

There, sitting on a cushion, was a big, brass idol.

Ness: the Mani-Mani statue! It can’t be! I destroyed it!

The idol seemed to be taunting him, its evil smile penetrated his senses.

Ness: well this time, I’m going to make sure that you don’t come back!

Ness jumped forward, bat at the ready, The Mani-Mani statue floated into the air and took its position a few meters in front of him.


Evil Mani-Mani attacks!

Evil Mani-Mani used PSI magnet a! Drained 5 PP from Ness.

Ness equipped the Trick Yo-Yo instead, Ness is attacking! BOOM! 158 damage off Evil Mani-Mani!

Evil Mani-Mani used PSI fire a! ZOOSH! 130 damage off Ness.

Ness equipped the Mr. Baseball bat instead. Ness is attacking, BOFF! 143 damage off evil Mani-Mani!

Evil Mani-Mani used PSI freeze a! BRRR! 181 MORTAL DAMAGE TO NESS!

Ness’s body solidified!

Ness was able to move!

Evil Mani-Mani is attacking! BOOM! 98 MORTAL DAMAGE TO NESS!

Ness tried Lifeup c! Ness’s HP is maxed out!

Evil Mani-Mani used PSI Magnet! Drained 7 PP from Ness.

Ness threw the Super Bomb! BOOOOOM! 253 damage to Evil Mani-Mani!

Evil Mani-Mani is attacking! 102 Damage off Ness!

Ness is attacking! BLATCH! 149 damage off Evil Mani-Mani.

Evil Mani-Mani was destroyed.

Ness’s bat smashed against the side of the idol for the last time as it blew apart, filling the air with bits and pieces.
He watched as the Mani-Mani’s head clattered against the wall, cracking in half.

Ness: there! You’re history!

A faint light rose from the remains of the statue and formed itself into a giant floating cloud. Ness stared in awe as the cloud formed itself into a little orb and dropped into his open palm.

Ness: y-you’re a Smash spirit?

Orb: I AM THE SMASH SPIRIT OF MEMORIES.

The room Ness was standing in dissolved back to reality. A warming scene greeted him.
The bar was totally different now, It had two counters and five tables, Fox was standing over him, slapping his face.

Ness: ugh! Fox! stop that!

Fox: hey he’s back to normal!

Jigglypuff was sitting in a corner, covered in bruises and bumps.

Jigglypuff: thank goodness!

Ness: what happened? Why is Jigglypuff beaten up? Where is Mr. Game and Watch?

Fox: there was a Smash spirit in the bar! You walked right into it and it possessed you or something! We tried to stop you, but you waved us away…Mr. Game and Watch went to get help…you where like…in a trance or something! You where talking about things and saying “yes” and “no” and you attacked Jigglypuff with some really impressive looking spells!

Ness: OH! SORRY JIGGLYPUFF!

Jigglypuff: ooh, aah!

Ness: Look! I-I caught the last Smash spirit!

Fox: WHOA! YEAH! NOW THE TOURNEYS CAN BEGIN AND WE CAN SHOW FALCO WHAT FOR!

Ness: YAAAAAAAAAAAY!

Jigglypuff: my arm feels sprained…

At that very moment, Mr. Game and Watch came bursting through the door, accompanied by Master and Crazy hands, and all the smashers.

G&W: oh, you’re O.K…

Ness: I captured the last Smash spirit!

M hand: the Smash spirit of memories! How on earth did you catch that? Well this is good news! Now we can Finally start the tourneys!

All: YAAAAAAAAAAY!

M hand: I’ll start making preparations! We should have everything ready by tomorrow!

C hand: doing d-d doing d-d doing d-d doing d-d doing d-d!

M hand: whatever you say, sped…I suggest you smashers go to your dorms and train…Tomorrow is a big day!

All: YAAAAAAAAAAY!

The smashers turned and went to their dorms. Ness was sure he saw Falco scowl at him, but he didn’t care.
He felt special. And he couldn’t wait for the tourneys.

 

[MewtwoMaster2002]

Nice update. Was Ness thinking of them as an enemy after the smash spirit of memories took over his mind?

 

[NESSBOUNDER]

In EarthBound, Ness examined the wall of the bar in Fourside, and discovered a hidden storeroom, but upon opening the door, the Mani-Mani statue created an illusion that turned the whole city completely weird!
Once you located the Mani-Mani statue, in the new, imaginary city of Moonside, and destroyed it, the illusion would stop and you found out that you where actually wandering around inside the wearhouse, trapped in your own little world! Freeky!
(perhaps that will help you understand what appened in that last update)
The Smash spirit of Memories recreated this level from Ness's mind. And yes, Jigglypuff was actually both enemies in Ness's distorted vision.

 

[MewtwoMaster2002]

I guessed right. Man Jigglypuff must feel awful. Now I wonder how Jigglypuff used those attacks. Why was Jiglypuff the only one beaten up?

 

[DarkLink567]

Finally the tournaments. :D :D :D

 

[PsiFlameMaster]

sry i havent replied in a while. finaly the tournament! poor puff, getting attacked... hope she'll be ok 4 the tournament! now i realy wish i could get Earthbound! great updates!

 

[KingMewtwo1112]

Ah, Moonside, I remember that. BTW, good update.

 

[NESSBOUNDER]

Tounament? What tournament? MWUHAHAHAHAHAHAAA!
Oopsie...

By the way, Jigglypuff didn't use all those attacks, Ness just thought she did. She was probably using pound and things like that.
Here's the next update! Whoot!

CHAPTER 3: PART 1! (yay, yay)
Oh dear!

Day couldn’t come sooner for Ness, at exactly six o’ clock, he jumped out of bed and started his exercises, did some tricks on his yo-yo, practiced with his bat and got changed and showered.
After that, he trust open his door and waltzed happily down to the great hall.

The fellow smashers he met on the way where also just as excited. There was a lot of conversation and “I’ll beat you” s going on.
The great hall was jam packed with smashers and wireframes. Even the commentator was there, smiling like a maniac and showing his impressive set of teeth.

Ness: oooh cool! I can’t wait for the tourneys!

Fox: me neither!

Jigglypuff: shhh! The Master hand is going to speak!

M hand: Smash Brothers and Sisters…It gives me great pleasure to inform you that blah blah blah blah woof gobble cackle oink moo baa etc. etc.

G&W: boring boring boring…How can he remember all that?

Mario: ya!

M hand: …but unfortunately, the tournaments will have to be delayed once again I’m afraid, due to…

All: HUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUH?!

M hand: hehe…er…don’t be angry at me…but we will have to delay the tourneys for a bit due to…some, er, problems in the way…

All: HUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUH?!

M hand: er, letmeexplain…My ******** brother, Crazy hand, was helping me with the computer and he, er, accidentally unfroze time in your home worlds and, er, opened up all the dark voids in them…unleashing evil forces into your worlds, I’m so sorry.

C hand: It wAs OnlY an AxE!

All: HUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUH?!

M hand: er, you’re going to have to go back and protect your worlds…sorry…Um, you will be able to find out which worlds are under attack on that monitor over there…If your dimension isn’t under attack you may go with someone who’s is and help them…In order to seal up the dark voids, you must bring back a special item from the traumatized world and bring it back here…I will then GHEE!

The Masetr hand jerked back, surrounded by a dim blue light. He floated in the air, rigid.
The same happened to Crazy hand.
When the light faded, both Master and Crazy hand fell to the ground.

Peach: MASTER HAND! (runs over to help)

Before Peach even got close to the hands they slowly rose back into the air. The Master hand cracked his knuckles, Crazy hand floated silently beside him.

Peach: e-e-er…are you alright?

M hand: I am fine, I do not know what just came over me…

Crazy hand floated next to him, not making a sound.

Peach: is HE O.K?

C hand: oh, I AM FINE, THANK YOU, I mean, ThAn Yow.

Peach: ?

All: ?

M hand: well what are you staring at? Go and bring back those items! The teleporter is over there!

All:…O.K.

Ness watched as his fellow smashers checked the monitor and stepped into the teleporter.
There was something not right about the hands. He was sure that their voices where coming from BETWEEN them…

Fox: the Lylat system is fine…Jigglypuff is going with the rest of the Pokemon to defend Pokeworld…Mr. Game and Watch is going to defend Superflat world…

Ness: I can’t believe the hands have just put our homes in danger! I can’t believe it! Is Earth under attack?

Fox: yeah. I’ll help you! I want to see your planet…

Ness: right! c’mon then.

Fox: the teleporter is that way…

Ness: we aren’t using the teleporter…hold my hand!

Fox: what are you…

Ness: hold my hand!

Fox: oh, right…but…

Ness: PSI TELEPORT!

Fox: WHOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOAAAAAH

Ness shot off down the corridor like a rocket, Fox had to run as fast as he could to keep up with him. The walls of the Academy became a blur.

Ness: and now…TAKEOFF!

The air in front of them tore apart like a curtain, Fox suddenly found that they where now walking at a leisurely pace. They seemed to be in a tunnel of swirling blue light.

Fox: this is hyperspace!

Ness: yup! I know hyperspace like it’s the back of my hand!

Fox: that’s fantastic! Even the best pilots get lost in hyperspace!

Ness: take the right turns, and you can end up in a completely different world…We are going to my dimension now. It’s to the left a bit, then right, then right again, then west.

Fox: amazing…but why didn’t you take the teleporter?

Ness: I have a perfectly good reason for not taking the teleporter. Sit down and I’ll tell you.

Fox sat down on the “floor.”

Ness: the teleporter transfers you as you are, to the dimension chosen. Now look at you and look at me… do you see how different we are?

Fox: yes.

Ness: the people of Earth don’t take kindly to anything that doesn’t seem normal, if we had went by teleporter, you would have stayed a fox, and there would have been a major riot or something. But if you travel through hyperspace, your appearance is changed to suit your destination, so when re arrive on Earth, you will be a human!

Fox: no way!

Ness: well would you rather be skinned and turned into a rug?

Fox: eeeeew! The people on your planet must be barbarians!

Ness: don’t forget that all animals on my planet are small…

Fox: oh yeah I forgot.

Ness: O.K. now let’s go!

Fox: is being a human hard?

Ness: I’m sure you’ll get used to it…come on!

Ness and Fox walked around in cyberspace for a while. Fox was getting bored, when suddenly he found himself hurtling along a peaceful looking street like a missile.
This sudden increase of speed threw Fox off balance and he careered into Ness, who had landed perfectly on his feet.

Ness: oops, I guess I should have told you that was coming…

Fox: ahhh… … ……. m-my hands! My fur is gone!

Ness: yeah, you’re a human.

Fox: my face is so flat! I can’t smell anything…Gee, I can sure see better though…This is totally weird!

Ness: be grateful, you’re actually very good looking…I wish I was so good looking…

Fox: (looks in drug store window) hmm…I can see how I could be considered to be handsome by human terms…

Ness: hmf!

Fox: what? Remember, I’m at least twelve years older than you…

FINALY! I CAN NOW DO SOMETHING WITH MY ABSOLUTE FETISH FOR EARTHBOUND! STAY TUNED FOR THE NEXT WEIRD-A!% ADVENTURE!
DUM DUM DUM DUM etc. etc.

 

[MewtwoMaster2002]

Nice update. The hands did act strange.

 

[NESSBOUNDER]

CHAPTER 3: PART 2

Ness and Fox walked down the quiet streets of Onett. They passed the hospital, the hotel, and everything else worth passing as Ness filled Fox in on how everything worked on Earth.
Fox was listening intently, lapping up every bit of information.

Ness: come on! I’ll introduce you to my friends!

Fox: that’s fine…But w…

Ness: I know what you’re going to ask…don’t worry, we don’t just play games and stuff like that.

There where screams of “hey Ness!” and “Ness! Wait up!”

Fox turned around to see three kids running up to them.

One was a girl in a pink dress, she carried a little handbag by her side and wore a red ribbon in her hair. The other two were boys, one had a pair of dorky-looking glasses and a mushroom haircut, and the other seemed to be dressed in a karate costume, and had a snake-like hairdo that made his head look like a bomb with a long fuse.

Ness: hey guys! What’s up?

The boy with the glasses spoke.

Jeff: huh? Don’t you remember? You just disappeared about an day ago! We where walking down the street and suddenly you disappeared and we couldn’t find you and we looked and looked and you weren’t there and we walked around, calling you but you wouldn’t answer because you weren’t here and then we heard a noise and we ran down here and we found you and that guy lying on the ground and it looked like you teleported and we…

The girl in pink interrupted.

Paula: oh Jeff, I think he knows that bit.

Jeff: oh…I think I’ll go and fix a pipe now…

Paula: there’s no need to explain Ness. I know where you where and I know that time was frozen.

the kid in the costume pointed his finger accusingly at Fox.

Poo: who is this suspicious looking person? He has sneaky eyes, like that of a cowardly jackal! Is he bad? Or good…or just here at the wrong time? I do not know. Do you know this man, Ness?

Ness: er…this is Mr. Fawkes McCloud…he’s my friend.

Paula: I know who you really are, Mr McCloud…And I know WHAT you really are…but I suppose it really doesn’t matter, you have a pure heart, I can sense it.

Fox: uh…yeah.

Poo: hoihoihoihoihoi! (does a little psycho dance)

Paula: that’s his way of saying “hi”

Ness: so what’s been happening? This place is supposed to be under a…

Paula: yes, there is trouble…lately there has been strange happenings…weird lights in the forest, people have gone missing…animals have been acting strangely…

Ness: do you think Giygas is back?

Paula: not Giygas, some other dark force…I have seen traces of it around these parts since yesterday. And…

A mighty explosion sounded from the Pizza shop, Ness could see a plume of gray smoke coil into the air. There was shouting, and a bunch of costumed hooligans sprinted down the road, one of them was carrying a bag.

Ness: those are the Sharks! I thought I put an end to their gang!

Paula: there have been an increase of Shark attacks lately, both in town and on the beach.

Jeff: *snicker!*

Paula: what’s so funny? The Pizza shop just got blown up!

Fox: can anyone tell me what’s happening?

Ness: those are bad guys, we have to stop them!

Fox: oh…I knew that.

Jeff: can you fight? I think you may want a weapon first…

Fox: got one (shows blaster)

Jeff: wow! You must work for the F.B.I. or something!

Poo: the scungy dumb-dumb head people bad guy dudes are coming our way!

Ness: there are a lot of them, this is going to be a tough battle!

The Sharks came running down the road, upon seeing Ness and friends, they stopped and began mumbling and talking. A rather mean looking guy shoved his way through the mass of Sharks. He was obviously the leader, judging by the slogan on his shirt saying: “I’m the boss of this gang and I’m one bad mutha.” The letters where tiny, but Ness could read them. Like the rest of the mob, this guy wore a cloth mask over his head, with big red lips and goggles and a cardboard dorsal fin strapped to his head, it made him look like he was an African fellow wearing lipstick.

Shark: well, well, well…what have we here? You’re that snotty little kid who some how managed to defeat our whole gang all those years back.

Ness: yeah! I did too! So why are you starting again?

Shark: well why not? Anyway, we only do what Frank tells us to, and Frank serves the power, can’t say much more.

Ness: the power? Who’s the power?

Shark: don’t ask me! I don’t know!

He stared at Paula, Jeff, Poo and Fox.

Shark: I see you got some fellow freaks since last time to help you out! Well no matter how many friends you got, we’re going to pound your sorry *** into jelly, aren’t we, boys?

Shark minions: YEEEEEAAH!

Paula: you brainless fools, do you not have the sense to respect those who control supernatural powers? Do you not know you are facing a bunch of superior magicians and one dweeby little computer nerd with glasses who would be all but useless if he wasn’t a bit of a whiz with the funky gadgets and things?

she paused.

Paula: oh, and a big man from another dimension who used to not be a man.

Fox: (leans over to Ness) she almost sounds evil when she does that…I’m surprised she didn’t laugh.

Paula: har har har!

Fox: …

The Shark leader looked unimpressed.

Shark: where I come from, them’s fightin’ words!

Paula: no! You don’t SAY…(sticks her finger in her ear and pulls a stupid face)…Look At mE! I’m a ShArk! An’d I’m Shtooopid!

Shark: c’mon boys! Let’s show that (insert rude word here) the true power of the Sharks!

The mass of hooded teen-agers crowded around Ness and his friends and prepared to attack.

Ness reached for his bat, the others armed themselves as well.

Ness: Fox…get out your weapon…this is about to get hairy!

 

[MewtwoMaster2002]

That was funny.

Paula: no! You don’t SAY…(sticks her finger in her ear and pulls a stupid face)…Look At mE! I’m a ShArk! An’d I’m Shtooopid!

I liked that part. Man Fox will beat them easily.

 

[PsiFlameMaster]

awsome! great update!

Jigglypuff: shhh! The Master hand is going to speak!

M hand: Smash Brothers and Sisters…It gives me great pleasure to inform you that blah blah blah blah woof gobble cackle oink moo baa etc. etc.

G&W: boring boring boring…How can he remember all that?

Mario: ya!

M hand: …but unfortunately, the tournaments will have to be delayed once again I’m afraid, due to…

All: HUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUH?!

M hand: hehe…er…don’t be angry at me…but we will have to delay the tourneys for a bit due to…some, er, problems in the way…

All: HUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUH?!

M hand: er, letmeexplain…My ******** brother, Crazy hand, was helping me with the computer and he, er, accidentally unfroze time in your home worlds and, er, opened up all the dark voids in them…unleashing evil forces into your worlds, I’m so sorry.

C hand: It wAs OnlY an AxE!

All: HUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUH?!

fox is in human form huh?hehehe... stupid sharks! keep updating!:D

 

[NESSBOUNDER]

CHAPTER 3: PART 3

The gang of Sharks crowded around, ready to attack. The leader signaled a particularly brawny looking member. He grinned and started his attack.

The Shark produced a hula hoop and swung it with all his might, sending Poo flying into a building. Paula smashed the Shark over the head with her frying pan, knocking him senseless.

Suddenly they where facing six Sharks! Ness used PSI flash b, three of the Sharks began to cry, two began to feel strange and one was defeated right out.
Paula used a PSI fire attack, damaging all six. Jeff attacked with his laser gun, defeating one of them.
Fox used a firefox attack, defeating two of the minions.
Poo used PSI thunder, but it missed.

The Shark furthest to the left was feeling a little funky, he attacked his friend by accident, defeating him. Ness smashed him with the baseball bat, knocking him out.

Now there where TWELVE Sharks!
Ness began by using PSI flash again, making most of the Shark gang cry like babies and defeating about three of them.
Paula attacked with her most powerful PSI fire attack, damaging about seven of the hooded hooligans.
Fox fired a barrage of lasers into the pack, defeating three.
Poo attacked with PSI thunder, but this time, it hit twice, defeating two of the remaining Sharks.
Jeff shot his laser, defeating one more.

The three remaining Sharks attacked. One charged forward on a pogo stick, but missed, due to the tears in his eyes. The second fired a bottle rocket! It slammed into Fox’s gut, knocking the wind out of him. The third Shark had a stupid grin on his face, and forgot to attack.

Ness and co. gang-bashed the last two Sharks into submission.
Then the leader stepped forward.

Leader: hmmm…you’re stronger than I predicted…oh well, you won’t beat me!

The leader suddenly swung the bag with all his might, POW! it connected with the side of Paula's head, defeating her in one hit! Whatever was in there must have been incredibly heavy.

The leader didn’t attack again…he ran off down the street, laughing like a fool.

Ness: you wuss! Come back and fight!

Fox: Ness…your girlfriend is hurt.

Ness: SHE’S NOT MY GIRLFRIEND! (goes all red)

Paula: owhhhhoo…my head hurts…boohoohoo!

There was a massive lump forming on her noggin.

Ness closed his eyes and placed his hand on Paula’s head. A cool blue light ran along his arm and the lump disappeared.

Fox: wow! That must be so useful…can you do that anytime?

Ness: only when I have enough psychic power, which is gained by sleeping and chasing butterflies.

Fox: ?

Ness: yeah, it sounds weird, I know…

Jeff: I heard that they’re having trouble over at Fourside…maybe we should go there and see what’s wrong.

Ness: good idea, I bet that’s where this “power” is hanging out. But first I think we ought to go see Frank.

Fox: who’s Frank?

Ness: the big boss of the Sharks. I bed he could tell us heaps.

Paula: doesn’t he hang out near the game arcade?

Ness: yeah…come on let’s go!

* * *
Inside the game arcade, things where dark and freaky. All the lights where off and all the arcade machines where playing the same game.

Ness: “Domination”? I’ve never heard of that game.

Paula: this is no time to be looking at games. Frank should be outside, in that little fenced-off part that can be accessed through that door over there.

Ness: oh…yeah! Come on!

Frank stood in the yard, with his back towards them. He obviously didn’t know they where there. Ness signaled to the others and they took cover in a nearby bush.

Frank wasn’t alone. He was talking to one of the oddest-looking things Ness had ever seen. (and that’s saying something) The creature appeared to be a pair of pajamas! Or somebody wearing pajamas who was invisible.
It had little pictures of eggs and salad on it and was talking in the kind of voice you get if you squeeze your nostrils together and then say “hello” (try it! It’s really cool, honest)

Pajaman: I warn you, if you do not have the materials within the time it takes for the mothership to land, we will hurt you rather badly and we will point rudely at you with our sleeves and go “ha ha ha!” The power does not accept incompetence.

Frank: like, chill out dude…the materials are right here, I’ve got them in this bag.

Pajaman: oh goodie.

Frank: like, don’t forget my reward, dude.

Jeff: oh no…this is a ragweed bush…my hayfever…a-a-a—a-a-aa-a---a-a-- -a-aCHOOGIESNOTER!

Fox: I’ve never heard that one before.

Frank: who’s there?

Pajaman: well…these must be the boys who defeated master Giygas. Hehehee…but he was a fool…you will not stand a chance against the power. It shall crush you like a crusty hankie that hasn’t been washed in a thousand years!

Fox: very descriptive, aint he?

Ness: why are you attacking Earth?

Pajaman: why not?

Ness: well this is MY planet, and I’m not going to let you attack us like this.

Ness swung the bat at the Pajaman, it hit squarely in the middle, the creature toppled over.

Pajaman: how dare you!

The Pajaman whipped out a cell-phone and gibbered into it for a while, suddenly ten more Pajamen joined the battle!

Ness: y-y-you can’t DO that!

Pajaman: says who? Moo-ha ha!

Oh no, it looks like this new enemy is going to be much more of a handful than they thought! Will Ness and friends win this fight?
Tune in to the next update, next week to find out!

 

[MewtwoMaster2002]

Nice update. I thought it's Eagleland, not Earth?

 

[PsiFlameMaster]

Leader: hmmm…you’re stronger than I predicted…oh well, you won’t beat me!

The leader suddenly swung the bag with all his might, POW! it connected with the side of Paula's head, defeating her in one hit! Whatever was in there must have been incredibly heavy.

The leader didn’t attack again…he ran off down the street, laughing like a fool.

Ness: you wuss! Come back and fight!

Fox: Ness…your girlfriend is hurt.

Ness: SHE’S NOT MY GIRLFRIEND! (goes all red)

Paula: owhhhhoo…my head hurts…boohoohoo!

There was a massive lump forming on her noggin.

Ness closed his eyes and placed his hand on Paula’s head. A cool blue light ran along his arm and the lump disappeared.

Fox: wow! That must be so useful…can you do that anytime?

Ness: only when I have enough psychic power, which is gained by sleeping and chasing butterflies.

Fox: ?

Ness: yeah, it sounds weird, I know…

heheehe. Pajaman, huh? *uses PK fire on them and sends them to bed* MWAHAHAHHAHAHAHA!!! ME AM BETTER THAN PAJAMAS! cant wait 4 updates! hay fever! hahahaha!

 

[PsiFlameMaster]

Yay!!! the forums are back up!!!!! but were althe way back to the pajamen!!! o well. we'll catch up..... right?

 

[Pokemasterkatie]

Yeah, Gideon's halfway through getting the threads up. Everything will probably go back to normal by next week.

BTW, expect me to change my sig this week!

 

[MewtwoMaster2002]

yes, I'm soooo happy it's back up. oh yeah. oh uh when is the next chap coming.

 

[jet]

ditto MM2k2 said, this is one of my favorite stories so plz update soon

 

[MewtwoMaster2002]

This is my most fav fics here so update ASAP.

 

[NESSBOUNDER]

sPecIal Announcement

Aw-waAAh?! My treadly threadley has been sliced in half! Goobies!
Good thing I saved the Earthbound crisis chapters to Word!
All you fic fans be a weenie bit patient as I draw a magic card that can help with this horrible mishap...(I've recently become a Yugi-oh fan)...ahhh, the perfict one, BIG RESTORATION 2000. This card enables me to re-post EVERY SINGLE BLUDDY POST that I lost during that site crash!

As I rebuild my shattered fic, I hope you all will enjoy these ephisode re-runs. (they do them ALL THE TIME on Cheeze TV...)

Kao!

 

[NESSBOUNDER]

CHAPTER 3: PART 4

Ness awoke on the far side of town. His body was covered with bruises and cuts and he seemed to have a black eye.
He looked around to see Fox lying beside him, equally beaten up. Jeff, Paula, and Poo had been reduced to little angels and where floating around with a lost expression on their faces.

Ness: w-what happened…Fox, are you O.K?

Fox groaned and did the thumbs up, which seemed to mean that he was.

Ness: oooohgh…I remember now, the Pajamen things beat us! And badly!

Fox: noo…you don’t say…

Ness: oh man…they crushed us by superior numbers…and did you see how powerful each one was?

Fox: …

Ness: come on, Let’s get Paula, Jeff, and Poo released at the hospital.

It didn’t take that long to get to the hospital. Ness walked up to the lady at the front counter and placed his ATM card on the desk.

Seccy: been in a fight, have ya?

Ness: I want to see some clients by the name of Jeff, Poo, and Paula.

Seccy: those three just arrived and are still unconscious, please pay the doctor’s fee and I’ll release them for you.

Ness: here you go. (hands over ATM card)

Seccy: there ya go…hope you get blasted again and end up back here! I get more money then…

The angels of Ness’s three friends where suddenly replaced by the real thing. They blinked and looked around.

Paula: oh c*ap, they beat us.

Jeff: are you surprised? you saw how powerful they where…

Poo: HOIHOIHOIHOIHOI!!!!

Ness: there just isn’t enough of us to match up to them…even with Fox-I mean-Fawkes helping us.

Jeff: oh well…Looks like the Earth is doomed.

Fox: I have a brilliant idea!

All: ?

Fox: Jigglypuff and Mr. Game and Watch! They can help us!

Jeff: Jigglywhat and Mr. Game and WHO?

Paula: shut up Jeff. You wouldn’t understand.

Ness: good idea, er, Fawkes…but Jigglypuff and Mr. Game and Watch are busy in their dimensions fighting the evil over there!

Fox: well let’s go over there and give them a hand. Once they’ve overcome their problems they can come back to Earth and we’ll fight the Pajamen together! It’s the only way.

Ness: Fox is right, it IS the only way. We need more firepower and we need it fast.

Jeff: what’s happening?

Ness: we’re going to another dimension to find one of my friends who can help us.

Jeff: you have alien friends??

Paula: Jeff…I advise you to keep quiet until I can do some serious explaining. You have a LOT to learn about things outside the physical world.

Jeff:…I’m sorry.

Ness: grab onto each other, everybody! We’re getting outta here!

All five warriors rocketed down the street at the speed of a flying man with his pants on fire. (which is quite fast, for those of you who can’t take a hint)
The speed increased until everything blurred, and then there was silence.

Cyberspace loomed before them. Ness really did know it like the back of his hand. He went left, then right, then left again…then straight ahead and VOOOOOOOOOM! The fabric of the dimension tore apart and they went flying out like a chicken bone propelled from the muffler of an exploding car.
Fox was ready for it this time, he dug his heels into the ground and managed to keep his balance.

The first thing they noticed was that everything appeared to be 2D. Next, they noticed that THEY where 2D! Ness found that he could go in any direction, but he was flat. It was a weird experience. Third, they noticed that they where all sprites. Ness was a red sprite, Fox was brown, Paula was pink, Jeff was green and Poo was white. Their shapes stayed the same.
Jeff was about to open his mouth and say something, but Paula quickly whisked him into a corner and started telling him about the Superflat world.

Ness was speechless. This was amazing! A whole 2D city filled with 2D inhabitants loomed before him. He was shaken from his stupor as a loud beep pierced his senses. The city was being invaded! There where sprites running all over the place, some where just normal Game and Watch sprites. But there where other ones too…purple ones that appeared to have ears and tails that resembled those of cats. These hybrid sprites where wielding tools and wrenches, and attacking the Game and Watch sprites.

Ness and friends surveyed the chaos from a distance. Fox’s eyes darted from building to building, taking in every bit of possible information they could. Ness appeared to be watching as well. But Fox couldn’t tell, because he couldn’t see Ness’s eyes. ( he’s a Game and Watch sprite, remember?)

Fox’s eyes suddenly caught sight of something on to of one of the smaller 2D buildings. There, standing on top of the building, was a familiar black sprite, Battling it out with a group of purple ones.

Fox: Ness! I can see Mr. Game and Watch!

Ness: me too! And it looks like he’s taking a beating! We’ve got to help him!

Ness, Fox, Paula, Jeff, and Poo mustered up all their courage and charged towards the building, right into the midst of the battle.

The city was definitely under attack. There was lots of fighting and beeping and pixilated explosions. Ness and co. weren’t interested in fighting though, they just had to get to the top of that building!

Ness: I bet we could jump up there! First we jump up onto that shop over there…and then we jump onto the building! Jeff, just stay down here and for goodness sakes, don’t pick any fights…

Jeff: eye eye!

Ness: now on the count of three…one, two, AAARGH!

A purple sprite had ran over and hit Ness with a wrench. Ness groaned and got into a fighting stance.

Ness: change of plans, guys…We jump up there AFTER we put this freak in his place!

CHAPTER 3: PART 5

The purple sprite raised his wrench, readying for another attack. Ness saw this action and immediately ran over and kicked the sprite hard in it’s 2D gut. The sprite doubled over and began beeping loudly. Ness grabbed his bat in both hands and swung it in an ark over his head. CRACK! WHEEEEET! RED CARD! (and yes, I know you can’t get red cards in baseball) The purple sprite sailed gracefully over the tops of the buildings and smashed into a big digital clock, which exploded in a shower of glass and liquid crystal display.

Ness: these things aren’t all that strong…huh…now let’s go help Mr. Game and Watch!

On top of the small building, Mr. Game and Watch was fighting as hard as he could. The purple sprites outnumbered him and they attacked viciously. Nevertheless, he didn’t give up. One of the assailants ran forward and stabbed at him with a screwdriver, but Mr. Game and Watch nimbly stepped aside and smacked the evil sprite with one of his hammers.
The other three charged forward, catching him off balance, and knocked him to the ground. Mr. Game and Watch frantically started whacking them with his bell, knocking one unconscious. The remaining enemies managed to pin his arms and legs to the floor. He was helpless now.

Mr. Game and Watch looked up to see another black sprite walking towards him, this sprite looked evil, and had a giant pneumatic drill for an arm.

G&W: Master Disaster!

M.D.: yes my foolish life-saving adversary…we meet again.

G&W: since when do you have followers? What are these creatures?

M.D.: aaaah, yes…my little army…well Mr. Game and Watch, you see…I never really was much of a villain before…I created little fires here…the occasional oil spill there…nothing really earth-shattering. And you simply came and saved the day every time. But now I’ve gained in power! I have allied with the dark forces near the battery hills and now the entire mutansprite race serves my every whim. MWAHEEHO!

G&W: mutansprites! I can’t believe anyone could stoop so low as to enslave an entire race of peaceful creatures and force them to fight like this!

M.D.: hehehe…my dear Mr. Game and Watch…they like it this way, don’t you, Rizzasca?

The mutansprite that was holding Mr. Game and Watch down nodded her head slowly.

M.D.: well I can’t stand around all day talking, I have a world to conquer…kill him for me, won’t you Rizzasca?

The mutansprite flipped Mr. Game and Watch over on his flat side and held a screwdriver to his heart. Mr. Game and Watch readied himself for what was going to happen next. Suddenly, a bright light filled the air and a familiar voice screamed out “PK FLASH b!”

A huge flash filled the air. Two of the mutansprites holding Mr. Game and Watch down where vaporized. Rizzasca jerked back in a confused way and attacked the other remaining mutansprite, who stumbled over the edge of the building.

G&W: NESS! FOX!

Paula: and their friends! We’re here to save the day, yeah! PSI FREEZE c!

A swirling cascade of ice particles shrouded Rizzasca, defeating her in one hit.

Master Disaster was crying like a baby. He shook his fist and blubbered.

M.D.: WE’LL WEET AGAIN MR. GAME AND WATCH! “sniff” MARK MY WORDS! BOHOOHOO! (flies away in a helicopter)

G&W: Ness! Fox! I’d recognize your shapes anywhere! What are you doing here? Who are these people?

Ness: these are my friends, Paula, Jeff, and Poo.

Poo: HOIHOIHOIHOIHOIHOIHOIHOIHU)OUOI!!!!!!

G&W: well any friend of Ness’s is a friend of mine. Pleased to meet you all. Thank you for saving me.

Fox: what is going on here?

G&W: my old enemy, Master Disaster is back again. And he’s got an army this time. He’s somehow managed to brainwash the ancient mutansprite race. They lived peacefully beside us until now…

Fox: what a bad guy.

Ness: that’s terrible!

Paula: @#%!!

Poo: that son of a smelly old turd!

Jeff: I wander where he got that helicopter from?

All except Jeff: -_-!

Jeff: what? Technically, It’s impossible for a helicopter to materialize out of nothing and function properly.

Paula: It is in our dimension, but not here…

G&W: this is no time to be pulling weird anime faces. Cardboard city is still under attack!

Ness: Me and Poo should be able to fix that…

Ness and Poo stood on the edge of the building, watching the battle below. Ness raised his fingers to his temples and Poo did the same.

Ness: PSI SPORT c!

Poo: STARSTORM a!

Powerful psiwaves spread across the whole city along with hundreds of Glowing stars. The combined attacks hit and destroyed every single mutansprite that Ness and Poo could see. (just about all of them)

Mr. Game and Watch and Fox stared at Ness and Poo. Dumbstruck at such a display of power.
Jeff and Paula said nothing. They had seen it all before.

G&W: WOW! Ness, you could defend the whole city like that!

Ness: until I run out of PP.

Fox: holy blazes…

Paula turned around and saw that the mutansprite called Rizzasca hadn’t been completely destroyed by her PSI FREEZE attack and had somehow escaped Ness and Poo’s PSI as well.

Paula: this one is still alive, you guys. do we let her live?

G&W: umm…I’m in no position to decide that. You’d have to ask Berto…

Ness: who’s Berto?

???: I’M BERTO!

Ness turned and saw a very tough looking sprite climbing onto the building. He was wearing a cap (or a hard hat) and unlike Mr. Game and Watch, he had eyes.

G&W: that’s the thing…I’m part of a secret agency, and Berto is my boss.

 

[NESSBOUNDER]

CHAPTER 3: PART 6

Berto had one of those stern expressions that made little kids cry and melted porridge. He was carrying a big pole in one hand.

Mr. Game and Watch said “sir” and was silent.

Berto: Mr. Game and Watch. I’m curious as to who these people you seem to be accounted with are and where they came from. They’re certainly not Flatzone sprites…

B&W: sir! These are friends from an outer dimension. They come from a three-dimensional land and are brave and skilled warriors. They pose no threat to our society and have the ability to harness great powers, SIR!

Berto: I saw that…Two creatures wiping out an entire army on their own…quite remarkable if you ask me, too remarkable! I’m wandering if they can be trusted…You’ve always used interesting and unusual resources Mr. Game and Watch.

G&W: I’m sure we can trust them, sir.

Berto: hmmm…you are our best field operative, Mr. Game and Watch. I’ll take your word…but I warn you, if your friends harm one citizen of cardboard city, you’ll be for it!

He spun around and noticed Rizzasca for the first time.

Berto: you missed this one!

G&W: I believe this is a survivor, sir, we where waiting for your judgement.

Berto looked pleased that he was important.

Berto: get some of our soldiers to take her back to the base, we’ll interrogate her there.

Two little fireman dudes came running up with a stretcher and carried the wounded mutansprite off.

Mr. Game and Watch was preparing to leave when Berto walked over to him.

Berto: not so fast Game and Watch…Aren’t you going to introduce me to your friends?

G&W: o.k…this is Ness, a young boy with wonderful powers and his three friends, Paula, Jeff and Poo, and this is Fox, an athletic fighter who comes from an all-animal dimension.

Berto: hello, I’ll thank you for saving the city but don’t expect anything else from me. Come back to our secret base. I’m sure Mr. Game and Watch has much to tell.

* * *

The secret base wasn’t all that secret. Ness could tell where it was from a distance.
It was constructed under a big rock and a chimney stuck out of the ground in front of it.

Jeff snickered and tried not to say anything that might be considered rude.

Berto: you probably think this is just an ordinary rock, don’t you?

Ness didn’t say anything.

Berto: but it’s really our top-secret base!

He took out a little remote and pointed it at the rock. The rock exploded into a thousand pieces, exposing the entrance to the secret base.

Berto: now I just need to find another rock…

Fox: pffff!

Berto: wot?

Fox: uh…nothing.

Inside the base it was surprisingly well lit. Ness could tell that Fox and Jeff felt right at home. There where computers and machinery and vehicles and anything else I forgot.
Flatzone sprites where running around, practicing drills and eating.
None of them showed a bit of interest in Ness or the others.

Berto brought them all into his office and closed the door.

Berto: now Mr. Game and Watch…you are our stealthiest, most covert, most bestest secret agent we have…which isn’t saying much, seeing as all our other secret agents aren’t worth talking about.

G&W: ya…

Berto: well we’ve located Master Disaster’s base, and we can’t just get an army and storm it because it has lots of security and stuff and it’s right in the middle of mutansprite valley.
We need a small group of highly trained make-up artistes to go in there undetected and stop it at the head.
In other words, you and a bunch of cross-dressed weirdoes with near-superhuman abilities go around without being seen and destroy Master Disaster himself.

G&W: I see. You want me and my friends to do it instead of the other clumsy agents.

Berto: precisely!

The door of the room was opened and a skinny sprite came in and spoke in an ear-wateringly high-pitched voice that reminded Fox of Slippy.

Sprite: sir! The mutansprite refuses to tell us anything useful, what do we do?

Berto: have you tried threatening her with things that might hurt?

Sprite: yeah! But she says that whatever we do to her will be nothing compared to what they’ll do to her if she talks!

Berto: hmmm…a brave one, eh? Well she’s no use to us now, take her out the back and…

Ness: wait! Let me talk to her, I may be able to get her to talk.

Berto: you?

Ness: please give me a go. It’s worth a try!

Berto: fine, you go with Lorry here and try to get something out of her, but don’t try any funny business!

Lorry led Ness and co. down to the interrogation room where the Rizzasca sat in a chair, with a defiant look about her.

Ness: I hear you don’t want to talk.

Rizzasca: I’ll never talk…

Ness: and why not? Are you afraid that your boss will punish you?

The mutansprite was silent.

Ness: what makes you follow a leader like that? Something tells me that you certainly didn’t choose to follow him voluntarily.

Rizzasca: …

Ness: tell me, what happened to make your race obey Master Disaster? I’m not going to threaten you.

Rizzasca: he has great power…like none we have ever thought could exist. He can control…the air…and makes it hard to breathe…very hard…He made the air hard and said he would kill us all…so our leader said…our leader promised him anything…he wanted. He made us raid the city and he makes us mine for the white rocks up in the hills…

G&W: quartz?

Ness: and you could not stand up to him, he didn’t do anything for you, he’s invading your land and making you his slaves! Surly you must want to do something to stop him…

Paula: (whispers in Ness’s ear) keep going ness, I can sense that she’s starting to understand.

Rizzasca: …yes…but who can do such a thing?

Ness: we can! You’ve seen our powers, we can defeat Master Disaster, but we’re going to need all the information we can to enter his stronghold. You can help save your people, if you simply give us some information. You’ll be doing your whole race a favor.

Rizzasca: …I…will tell you how to enter the sacred shrine…beneath our city. I do not believe you can defeat the powerful one, but I will tell you to prove that my race is not evil.
you must move the hieroglyphs in this order…uh…Owl at the bird statue, elk at the animal statue, snake at the reptile statue…lightfish at the fi…

Rizzasca suddenly went rigid and began twitching violently, she fell from the chair and turned bright green.

Ness ran over to help her. As soon as he touched the mutansprite’s body, he was torn from reality as his mind fused with hers. Pain writhed through his body like he was being shocked by a 9000-volt power cable. A dark and evil-sounding voice filled his head.

Voice: RIZZASCA! YOU HAVE BETRAYED THE POWERFUL ONE! YOUR TOUNGUE WILL BE THE ROOTS OF YOUR SUFFERING! FROM NOW ON MAY YOU FEEL PAIN LIKE THAT OF A THOUSAND KNIVES WHENEVER YOU SPEAK YOUR TRAITOROUS WORDS!

Ness was blasted against the wall, surging with dark energy. Paula ran to his side to help, as did Fox.

Paula: Ness, are you…

Ness: ah…I’m fine…Check the mutansprite…

Rizzasca looked up. It was impossible to see her eyes
(she’s a sprite, remember?) but Ness was sure she would be crying.

Ness: what? lightfish at the…?

Rizzasca remained silent.

Paula: she’s been cursed. I can feel the dark magic powers around her…She can’t talk, or else she’ll get hurt.

Ness: that’s fine, she’s done enough. Did anyone write that down?

G&W: I-I-I did…(holds up piece of paper)

Ness: good, we’ll have to find out what it all means by our self.

Rizzasca stared dumbly at them, as if she wanted to tell them one more thing.

Fox: come on…I’m pretty sure we can’t get anything else out of her.

Ness: no…we can’t

The dark voice echoed around inside Ness’s mind. He couldn’t remember the pain anymore, only the voice. I wasn’t Master Disaster’s voice…
It was familiar.

(eerie music cue)