Crypto Vaporizes the Competition!
Chance: 5%
Destroy All Humans is a series with a cult following. The first game was released in 2005 and was met with positive reviews and good sales. It was followed up by three sequels: DAH 2, Big Willy Unleashed, and Path of the Furon in 2008. Destroy All Humans 2 was received even better than the original due to its improvements to the gameplay. Big Willy Unleashed and Path of the Furon, however, were met with mixed to poor reviews and sales. These games were developed at the same time and were rushed. The rushed nature of the games were clear and the games suffered because of it. After the release of these two games, the series took a hiatus for a long time.
That was until last year in 2019 when Publisher THQ Nordic announced that the first game was being remade for modern consoles and that it will come out sometime this year. Right now, Crypto’s greatest boost to his chances come from relevancy thanks to this new remake. The trailer for the remake on THQ Nordic’s YouTube channel currently has 4.6 million views. Additionally, major websites like IGN and Gamespot have been covering news for the game and overall it has been getting quite a bit of good media attention. The games have even been played by some big Youtubers, most notably jacksepticeye who did some videos for the first game.
THQ Nordic themselves has been around for several years now and they have been working with Nintendo to bring some of their games over to the Switch such as De Blob, Darksiders, and a few other games. While they are not even close to being the biggest western company, they do have a fair amount of franchises with dedicated fanbases.
Most of you are probably not that familiar with Crypto and Destroy All Humans in general. You are probably asking: What could this series bring to the table? I’m more than happy to explain. Crypto has obtained over 10 ground weapons throughout the series that could be used for a cool and unique moveset. He has his trusty Zap-O-Matic which shoots electricity. The Disintegrator Ray shoots balls of hot plasma that does heavy damage to even heavy vehicles like Tanks. The Ion Detonator acts as a grenade launcher that shoots ion bombs that detonate and instantly vaporizes humans and destroys vehicles. He also has his iconic Probe, though I can’t imagine a way for Sakurai to implement it into his moveset due to its disgusting nature.
But wait, there’s more! Crypto also has the Disclocator Ray which shoots discs that stick to humans and objects then makes them fly around in random directions. There is also the Superballer which shoots rainbow balls that stick to...you guess it, humans and objects and makes them bounce all over the place, dealing damage with each bounce. Gastro, while a weapon, is actually a summonable Furon that is in a holobob pod and he deals damage with a turret and explosive shots. Crypto also has Burrow Beast, Venus Human Trap, Meteor Strike, etc. As you can tell, Crypto has weapons for any situation and they are all fun to use and have their own great designs. This isn’t even counting Crypto’s psychokinesis (PK) powers. He can lift and throw objects, magnetize objects and people together, and even stop time.
Crypto would be a glass cannon. He has a lot of firepower, but is very vulnerable in close combat and can’t take too much damage. He needs to rely on his guns and PK powers to out-range his enemies to win, just like in his own games. In that regard, he would play kind of like Mega Man where he has little close combat options. His ground speed would be average. But what would make him truly unique is the fact that he has a jetpack and in Path of the Furon and in the remake, the jetpack is fast and really mobile, giving Crypto a lot of air time and potential to do combos. In the aforementioned two games, while flying, Crypto can use PK powers and his weapons, giving him a lot of potential for air combos (he can also fire his weapons while using his jetpack in the previous games, though it was much more restrictive). Overall, he would play unlike any other fighter.
As for the stage, there are a plethora of choices to choose from. There is Turnipseed Farm, the first invasion site of the first game. Rockwell, the atmospheric 1950s looking town with a circus. Area 42, a military base where mutant humans are being tested. Capital City, the last invasion site of the first game, features hostile big robots and the final boss where you fight the president who is in a giant mech. There are other areas like Bay City, Albion, Takoshima, and even a moon base. As you can imagine, there is plenty of potential for a neat stage with various background elements going on, as well as stage hazards like enemies shooting at the Smash characters, mutants attacking, and even a Godzilla-sized monster who can step on the characters. The stages above have 1950s and 1960s feel to them, which would make them stand out from the stage roster.
As for the music, Sari chose some good ones, but here are some other ones that are worth checking out:
These songs (and more) would add a different type of flavor to the music selection. Some of the music in the first game was done with a theremin, an instrument that was used in many 1950s science fiction movies, which gives the music its signature feel.
So here is all the positives in a nutshell: Cult following with a lot of passionate fans, hype has been built around the remake, Crypto having a unique moveset, and great stage and music potential. I also forgot to mention that Destroy All Humans does have Nintendo presence: Big Willy Unleashed being on the Wii.
Now onto the negatives and hurdles that Destroy All Humans faces. And unfortunately, there is a lot. As I explained DAH does have a cult following. However, that is the problem. DAH isn’t exactly an iconic series, even with all of its games covering a range of game consoles and the remake getting decent media attention. It’s a series that many would consider to be niche and leagues below any of the other third party characters. Even comparing him to Joker and Terry is a joke. Persona 5 is one of the most popular RPGs in recent years and Fatal Fury has a long legacy and the series is very popular in certain parts of the world. People expect a certain level of importance to these third party franchises. They don’t want just any typical video game to get a playable rep just cause the game is good and it has a cult following. While the first DAH was a notable game for what it managed to do with its gameplay at the time: Being able to go into a saucer and destroy any buildings in site with some debris and smoke visuals, etc. it didn’t take over the world by storm and the series’ decade+ long hiatus certainly doesn’t help it out in the legacy department either. To add onto this, I barely see anyone request him, let alone talk about him in speculation. That is always not a good sign.
Another hit towards Destroy All Humans is competition. As I’ve said earlier, THQ Nordic brought over some games to the Switch, one of these is a series called Darksiders. The first two games got ported to the Switch. Has Destroy All Humans been ported to the Switch in some way? No. Another big point is that the DAH remake isn’t coming to the Switch. What this tells me is that even if Nintendo approached THQ Nordic for a character, they might choose Darksider’s War over Crypto due to being able to profit off of the games. It’s possible that THQ Nordic could be working on a Switch port, but if not, then it’s a hurdle for the series to get a playable character. This is not even including other series like Red Faction into the mix.
Overall, as much as it pains me to admit, Crypto is not likely at all. Destroy All Humans is too niche and THQ Nordic is a small fish compared to the giants like Activision, Ubisoft and Bethesda. Even a 5% might be a bit much, but you know what, I have hope. If the budget did get smaller then maybe Nintendo did approach some smaller companies. It’s a reach, but not out of the realm of possibility.
Want: 100%
If the essay I wrote didn’t already make it clear enough, I LOVE Destroy All Humans. I started playing the games as a kid and I thoroughly enjoyed them. What they did for the time was great. Letting you walk around as an alien with an entire arsenal of weapons to kill humans and blow stuff up in creative ways was unlike anything else I played. The games had a unique charm to them with the 1950s, 60s, and 70s atmosphere. Crypto is an entertaining character with a snarky, sarcastic and comedic personality that crosses over to the over-the-top nature of the games. This personality can be shown off in the way he moves, attacks, and in his taunts. He is the type of character that you can cheer for despite him being a vicious alien that goes around killing all humans who get in his way.
Most of what I love about Destroy All Humans comes down to what I mentioned above. Specifically the moveset, stage and music. He has more than enough weapons and powers to make an insanely fun moveset. I mean for pete’s sake, he has weapons that can summon ground beasts, meteors from the sky, a shrink ray, a weapon that can shoot balls of lightning, and a gun that shoots rainbow balls that attach to people and objects and takes them for a ride. If that isn’t fun then I don’t know what is. This isn’t even accounting for his flying saucer in which he can use for his final smash: The Quantum Deconstructor which shoots a glob of green thermonuclear energy that destroys everything in its range. The potential is there for a sick moveset.
I also covered the wide range of possible stages. These games are a love letter to the eras they are set in. How cool would a stage be if it had a Godzilla-sized monster destroying a city and battling the military while at the same time occasionally damaging the Smash characters? I know I'm kind of repeating points but right now I’m just fanboying. The music, omg the music. Whenever that theremin plays it just reminds me of all the science fiction and horror movies I love and have watched over the years. The soundtracks aren’t amazing like the ones for the Final Fantasy games or Mario, but they certainly add a lot to the game and can be enjoyed on their own. Destroy All Humans is one of my top favorite series with the second game being my 7th favorite game (For the record, I have beaten and 100% the game at least 7 times. I have not done that for any other game). It would be a dream come true if Crypto could join Smash and be with all these gaming legends and characters that would be cool to see interact with him.
For all of those who managed to read all of this, thank you. I hope I informed some people on why Crypto would be such a cool character for Smash. He may not be a gaming legend, but he still has a lot to offer for Smash. Maybe I convinced some people to give the series a try. That would be nice. For those of you who are interested in learning more about Destroy All Humans and what Crypto’s moveset could look like, check out his support thread, which I have a link to in my signature (I apologize if I’m not supposed to put in a plug/advertise a support thread).
Prediction: Concept: Octopath Traveler rep - 7%
Noms: Concept: Contra rep x5