My heart has been shattered

[RyuReiatsu]

Look on the bright side. I'm 16 and I've NEVER had a romantic relationship. Ever. Honestly, I'm starting to get kinda desperate...

Don't you know anybody that interests you? If you do, ****, you better get started already D:.

^ Relationships are overrated.

Honestly, it saves you grief in the long run, lol.

That won't change the fact that buddy tiger didn't experience it first-hand. Which will make no difference that people point it out one after another.

 

[altairian]

Look on the bright side. I'm 16 and I've NEVER had a romantic relationship. Ever. Honestly, I'm starting to get kinda desperate...

Don't place too much importance on it. Girls can sense desperation a mile away Set goals for yourself and work toward them, and stay open to whatever opportunities come up. And when you're around girls, don't be Mr. Nice Guy, just be yourself.

 

[SuSa]

...what percentage of romances in general last until marriage? Is a relationship somehow not worth it if it doesn't result in marriage? o_O

We have a god**** winner Batman!

Seriously, marriage shouldn't be what you seek after in all relationships. It's not the only thing to come out of it.

 

[Mr. Rogu]

Look on the bright side. I'm 16 and I've NEVER had a romantic relationship. Ever. Honestly, I'm starting to get kinda desperate...

dude, dont worry about it. society today seems like you have to be in some kind of relationship during high school. so not true. its probably a good thing that you havent had one yet. then you wont have to worry/obssess over those type of problems. whether its cause you havent found someone to like or for some other reasons. youll have your opportunity. im pretty sure at least 25 percent of teens are together just so they can say they are with someone/not feel lonely anyways.

 

[RyuReiatsu]

dude, dont worry about it. society today seems like you have to be in some kind of relationship during high school. so not true. its probably a good thing that you havent had one yet. then you wont have to worry/obssess over those type of problems. whether its cause you havent found someone to like or for some other reasons. youll have your opportunity. im pretty sure at least 25 percent of teens are together just so they can say they are with someone/not feel lonely anyways.

Bad statistics.
I'd say at least 85%.

 

[Azua]

All of my relationships through highschool were a bunch of garbage. Don't put too much weight into it.

 

[.Marik]

^ While your post has an insane amount of truth in it, you can't help feeling let down everytime you get your hopes up thinking "she's the one, I love her" and then finding out she's another mediocre human being.

Just like the rest of the world.

 

[Azua]

That's life though. Life isn't a fairy tale or some movie/tv drama you see. Life is very much mediocre, and there's nothing wrong with that. I'd take mediocre over hellish any day.

[cue the user mediocre replying]

 

[Chronodiver Lokii]

That's life though. Life isn't a fairy tale or some movie/tv drama you see. Life is very much mediocre, and there's nothing wrong with that. I'd take mediocre over hellish any day.

[cue the user mediocre replying]

I agree >__<
Life sucks. Thats why its so awesome: WE HAVE TO MAKE THE BEST OF IT IN OUR OWN WAY! We cant just hope that life turns out perfect, we just have to hope and try for the best!

 

[Azua]

A mediocre life most certainly does not suck. There are -much- worse ways to live.

 

[Sinz]

A mediocre life most certainly does not suck. There are -much- worse ways to live.

This is so true. You just need to look on the bright side of everything. There is almost always a brightside. For example, yeah you guys broke up. But, hey now you can save some money and you have extra time to do whatever.

 

[Jin Kazama]

I second Killjoy, an average life doesn't suck. You should read my blog about it (not blatantly advertising)

 

[thanortinzak]

hola
10holas

 

[Dr.TobiasFunke]

As a therapist, I would say you are suffering from the pains of adolescence. Being the first analyst and therapist, I am in a unique position to both discover and help treat people who have psychological issues. Chances are you should get closer to this girl, and like nephew, you could end up being with the person you love. At some point, a friendship becomes so much like love the two overlap. For example, when my nephew got really close to his not biological cousin, he eventually got so close the two became very close and ended up together, until he grew out of it.

The point is, however, that formerly being an analrapist, you should really choose to follow my advice. Include the issues I have faced as an actor, you can understand that I know in the long term how to succeed (almost got a part after a few years of trying!) and that if you get close to her, you could easily have her eventually.

 

[thanortinzak]

i really like eating cookies

 

[Dr.TobiasFunke]

As a analrapist would say, you need to try to get closer to her. I understand she values the importance of the friendship but it you need to get it in the can, and and get closer to her. You are close but she obviously doesn't have a romantic feeling of you so get even closer to her so she wouldn't mind kissing that man between the cheeks.

 

[thanortinzak]

Tobias, you are not funny.

 

[POKE40]

She only wants to be friends to you.
Not that she hates you or anything. But she appreciates you being her friend.

Just talk to her more. Be her close friend. Have a great time.
Friendship lasts longer than dating.

I hope the best for you.

 

[Fatmanonice]

What I was going to say was pretty much already said by Teran but I wanted to add something else that helps you bounce back when they move away/ find somebody else/ turn you down; before you consider dating someone, find two other people you could potentially be interested in. From my experience, there are many advantages to this:

1. It helps you become more social and gain connections with a wider range of people.

2. It helps you from becoming infacuated because you can reasonably compare the three girls and it definately helps you from thinking that one of them is the best person in the world.

3. You get a better idea of what you like and what you don't like so, if things don't work out with one, you can more quickly find the characteristics you like in other women.

4. If things don't work out, you don't think it's the end of the world because it's apparent that you have other options. It really brings the "there's other fish in the sea" cliche to light.

5. Finding three different people takes time which in turn helps you critically look at the person. You may like them at first but how are they after knowing them for 2-3 months? Do they have any annoying tendecies that aren't apparent because you rarely see them, for example.

Also, I'd also strongly consider looking into basic body language because, like with most guys, there does seem to be some signals that you missed/underplayed as insignificant.

 

[¯\_S.(ツ).L.I.D._/¯]

Why would you ask out your really close friend in the first place?

I see two possible outcomes, it being a high school relationship and all.

1. She says no, you're sad, this is what happened, so I don't need to go into that.
2. She says yes, you guys have a relationship, you eventually break up. It's awkward and nothing great comes out of it. You could still be friends, but maybe not as close.

 

[RyuReiatsu]

Why would you ask out your really close friend in the first place?

I see two possible outcomes, it being a high school relationship and all.

1. She says no, you're sad, this is what happened, so I don't need to go into that.
2. She says yes, you guys have a relationship, you eventually break up. It's awkward and nothing great comes out of it. You could still be friends, but maybe not as close.

Personally, I think you're better off going for the 2nd option.
You can't really stay close friends with a girl you really want to hold in your arms, can you? It's dumb, I know.

 

[SuSa]

Man.... More people need friends with bene-...

I'll stop there.

 

[RyuReiatsu]

Man.... More people need friends with bene-...

I'll stop there.

F*ck YEAH. :embarrass

 

[Azua]

Personally, I think you're better off going for the 2nd option.
You can't really stay close friends with a girl you really want to hold in your arms, can you? It's dumb, I know.

that's extremely selfish. :\

 

[Teran]

Most teenagers want partners for the trophy value, tbh.

 

[¯\_S.(ツ).L.I.D._/¯]

Most teenagers want partners for the trophy value, tbh.

Pretty much.

 

[Oracle]

As sad as that is, it's completely true

@SOLID: The second option is only a problem because teenagers have this romanticized concept of relationships and love. Healthy relationships develop out of friendships, not as something different. If they aren't friends but they try to have a relationship, it's affection. If it's for the secks or whatever then it's lust.

 

[¯\_S.(ツ).L.I.D._/¯]

Yeah I know.

I'm saying that a high school relationship really isn't going to last, and it's going to be weird going back to being friends after going out.

 

[RyuReiatsu]

that's extremely selfish. :\

Don't blame me, I was just posting what most kids are thinking. :embarrass
No matter how stupid do I seem every time I post something like that, it has to be pointed out.
We, kids, are morons.

Although I could admit that I ain't even like that, which is quite ironic seeing as how I always post the about opposite.

 

[Firus]

We, people, are morons.

Fixed.

But yes, teenagers/kids tend to be even more so.

 

[Chaco]

Went through near this exact thing. Then I thought back about it, and realized that really all she could've ever been to me was a friend. So, now we're still best friends and shoot the **** daily. Do I ever wonder what could've been? Yeah. But so does she. Trust me, even if she rejected you it can still be hard on her. Now, avoid doing what I did. Do not become spineless. Do not worry abut her, act completely normal. If she has minuscule feelings for you they can grow, moping around and staying caught up will not get you this girl. I could tell you some other things to do and say, but I feel that would best not be used. :]

 

[00000]

What's the difference between infatuation, crush, and true love?

 

[Fatmanonice]

What's the difference between infatuation, crush, and true love?

Infatuation- You pretty much think that the person of your affection is the greatest person in the world, has no flaws, and that you pretty much can't live without them. Basically, what you get when you mix love, insanity, and obsession. A vast majority of the time, infatuation is one sided and the other person usually doesn't know that the person infatuated with them exists.

Crush- Like infatuation but milder and usually lasting no more than a month at best. Crushes usually occur with people who are "out of their league." From what I've seen, crushes usually happen among aquaintances in real life. Crushes can also be used to explain how people feel about celebrities or even fictional characters. For example, when I was five, I had a crush on Lydia from Beetlejeice.

True Love- A cliche used to promote chick flicks. Seriously, it's hard to describe love without dwelving into cliches and person opinions.

 

[Firus]

Crush- Like infatuation but milder and usually lasting no more than a month at best.

I wouldn't necessarily say crushes have a time limit -- in fact, they generally last quite some time from my experience, depending on the person. If you're really shy and aren't prepared to say anything to your crush, but you still really like them, chances are you'll maintain the crush until something happens or you're separated to the point where you forget about them.

I've known people who mentioned having a crush on someone once and never mentioned them again, and I've known people who had long, drawn out crushes that lasted years until something happened with the relationship, which is what happened to me in the only crush/relationship I've ever had. I can also think of two friends who had the same thing happen to them, just off the top of my head.

 

[thanortinzak]

What's the difference between infatuation, crush, and true love?

difference is x-y

 

[Sucumbio]

"What's wrong with E.E.?"

>.>

God I remember that feeling, tho. Horrible! Horrible. Last time I felt anything even remotely as bad I'd been sliced open and bowels re-sected. Tell ya, tho, it does go away finally, just don't MAKE it go away like I did, cause then you turn into something you may not want to be, or worse, spend way more time convincing yourself that is who you want to be.

 

[thanortinzak]

i see. thanks for your advice, man.

 

[Blizzard Flames]

I will message you when the time passes, and I still love her.

Thing is, I know its not just lust, infatuation, or a crush, etc, cause those won't last for over eight months. Plus, I loved her for who she was (personality, etc), NOT her looks.

Something happened like that to me too, except it was in 8th grade and we weren't so close. I didn't get over it for months.

You're lucky that you have girls in your school, though. Since I've been in Catholic school all my life I had to go to an All Boys school, which blows.

 

[GwJ]

http://www.allisboys.com

 

[Sucumbio]

i see. thanks for your advice, man.

anytime.

how has it been w/her since last month? Still awkward/painful or not so much now? I dunno what is with chicks like her, or dudes like us, but something in ours or their chemistry makes us gravitate to each other, just never for the -same- reason, and ultimately conflicting reasons. its definitely better to not become intimately friendly before intimately intimate. doesn't make sense at first, but in the long run you'll see it works much better. girls that start off as your best friend rarely end up your lover, at least not during teen years. now twenties + that's a different animal. I think people spend their whole lives puzzling out that one, and still can't come up w/anything definite. I was just lucky in my case, but one thing I did do differently w/my now-wife was meet her someplace where I knew we'd share common interests, and that's key.