Iliad
Smash Lord
Well, honestly I think it's been a long time coming. Everyone always asks me why I'm so amazing at everything I do and why the place I live is so fantastic and crime free. So let me get down to the top reasons why Hamilton is better than where you're from.
1) We have a **** ton of one way streets
Oh yeah balla, we don't gotta worry about no gridlock or traffic when all the traffic is going in one mo ****in' direction. It's like snakes and ladders, only in Hamilton everything is ladders, because we're better than where you're from.
2) We totally don't have crime or crackheads
Yeah, take a nice long stroll down along Barton or Cannon, you'll see what I mean. Cleanest neighbourhoods, no graffiti, definitely no *****s wandering the streets and absolutely no risk of being robbed, stabbed, kidnapped, sexually abused, or just receiving a beatdown. Hamilton is the furthest thing away from ghetto, with shop windows fully intact and everyone respecting the law. Oh and drugs are non-existant in Hamilton, everyone lives a clean and healthy life because we're better than where you're from.
3) We have a mountain that cuts our city in half
Hells yes we do. It's like this gorgeous luscious totally unscarred by construction or man-made objects wall of amazing that's superior to any mountain or hill you've ever seen. It lets the people who want a view of the water to live up top and people who want a view of a big *** mountain to live below. I mean, everest can't compare to this **** because we're better than where you're from.
4) The air is crisp and clean
Definitely no pollution up in this *****, and no foul smelling odour emanating from our shiz when you drive into it. It's like taking a plunge in a nestea pool only it smells of lilacs and fresh roses, not that molten steel and liquid garbage smell you're used to. And it totally isn't the cancer capital of Canada with all this fresh air, infact living here will cure the previous uncurable emphysemia, because we're better than where you're from.
5) We have the best Sonic, the best Bowser, the best Marth, the best Toonlink and the best Dedede in Canada
Bet you didn't know about THAT ****. Meek throwin' sonic booms left and right, King Kong ain't got **** on Phiddle, Iliad got them scarf aided tips, people are getting tuned by toonlink when Raidos is playing him, and melee magic infuses itself in sauc3's dedede to give you them STDs. We have all these amazing players and amazing character diversity... Why?
BECAUSE HAMILTON IS BETTER THAN WHERE YOU'RE FROM.
So get at the kids, not that you ever could.
1) We have a **** ton of one way streets
Oh yeah balla, we don't gotta worry about no gridlock or traffic when all the traffic is going in one mo ****in' direction. It's like snakes and ladders, only in Hamilton everything is ladders, because we're better than where you're from.
2) We totally don't have crime or crackheads
Yeah, take a nice long stroll down along Barton or Cannon, you'll see what I mean. Cleanest neighbourhoods, no graffiti, definitely no *****s wandering the streets and absolutely no risk of being robbed, stabbed, kidnapped, sexually abused, or just receiving a beatdown. Hamilton is the furthest thing away from ghetto, with shop windows fully intact and everyone respecting the law. Oh and drugs are non-existant in Hamilton, everyone lives a clean and healthy life because we're better than where you're from.
3) We have a mountain that cuts our city in half
Hells yes we do. It's like this gorgeous luscious totally unscarred by construction or man-made objects wall of amazing that's superior to any mountain or hill you've ever seen. It lets the people who want a view of the water to live up top and people who want a view of a big *** mountain to live below. I mean, everest can't compare to this **** because we're better than where you're from.
4) The air is crisp and clean
Definitely no pollution up in this *****, and no foul smelling odour emanating from our shiz when you drive into it. It's like taking a plunge in a nestea pool only it smells of lilacs and fresh roses, not that molten steel and liquid garbage smell you're used to. And it totally isn't the cancer capital of Canada with all this fresh air, infact living here will cure the previous uncurable emphysemia, because we're better than where you're from.
5) We have the best Sonic, the best Bowser, the best Marth, the best Toonlink and the best Dedede in Canada
Bet you didn't know about THAT ****. Meek throwin' sonic booms left and right, King Kong ain't got **** on Phiddle, Iliad got them scarf aided tips, people are getting tuned by toonlink when Raidos is playing him, and melee magic infuses itself in sauc3's dedede to give you them STDs. We have all these amazing players and amazing character diversity... Why?
BECAUSE HAMILTON IS BETTER THAN WHERE YOU'RE FROM.
So get at the kids, not that you ever could.
