LOL! A friend of mine from school is interested in having a school smash tournament at his house with a few select seniors. He comes to me to talk about it, and it was real funny to listen to his perspective. I tell him, "In competitive play, there are no items on. Ever." He looks dissappointed and is silent for a moment, then goes, "Well, maybe we could have the non-cheap ones on only, and have it on Very Low." I also had to explain the neutral stages and generic tournament rules. He wanted to use tournament mode and I told him that it's much more efficient to set up the tournament manually and have multiple TV's for efficiency.
And then, here's the best part.
He eventually mentions to me, "This'll be cool. Imagine. We could have, like, judges watching the matches to see if anyone does anything cheap. If anyone is like, being cheap, we could take away a stock, or like, make them take 100% or something." I asked him something he would consider cheap, and he responded, "Trapping people with Mewtwo's dark ball thingy, when you're charging it up, and they get stuck in it behind you." I then informed him of DI, and explained that "cheap" doesn't exist, which, I think he's still swallowing. Anyway, it made me laugh, and I trust you guys found it funny too.