LOL NEW SET TIME:
Dumb Realistic Kid!
Power: 0.000000000000001/10: He's a realistic kid, gosh. He can't be to powerful.
Walking Speed: 6/10: Meh.
Dashing speed: 6/10: Not a bad runner, but has a better chance of tripping than most.
Weight: 0.001/10: Jigglypuff is heavier than him in real life, in smash a kid could get OHKOed by Ivy's back aerial.
Range: 5/10: Meh.
Projectiles: 7/10: Good.
Attack Speed: 1/10:
He's a kid. Give him a break.
Fall speed: OVER 9000!!!!/10: He falls as fast as he normally would in real life... No aerial time for him.
Air Speed: 0.000000000000000000000001/10:
Size: 4/10: Ness. Lucas. TL. he's a kid.
First Jump: 2/10: He jumps sadly, not sadly, but with sad hight. Get it? GET IT?
GET IT!?!?!?!
2nd--- Wait, he has no second jump.
Recovery: 0/10: WTF?
Crouch: 5/10: He squats like most humans, especial the kids (Lucas, Ness and TL.)
Traction: 5/10: OK, but with shoes off, like, -9001? He also trips constantly with his shoes off, 70% of the time!!!!111
Combos: 0/10: You're kidding me, right?
Wall Jump: Ye-- Oh wait. Wrong set. NO!
Wall Cling: No
Crawl: Yes: But it's terribly slow, like 1/10.
Glide: No
Float: No
Tether Recovery: No
So, right on in...
Jab - Punch Punch Kick. All together, does very very very low knockback that doesn't really go any farther than one block until 999 damage and does 1 damage. Medium range, and high lag both starting and ending.
Dash - Trip. He trips. LOL. He also has no trip attack and takes forever getting up from a trip, because his granny appears and rubs his poor little wound for seven minutes.
U Tilt - Punch. He punches up with medium range and high lag both beginning and ending. Does one damage if you do it three times in a row. No knockback.
F Tilt - Punch. Guess what this does. Right!
D Tilt - Really Laggy Kick. He does a really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really laggy kick. It does nearly no knockback and one damage if you're lucky.
U Smash - Headbutt. He headbutts up. Yeah. It's laggy, has OK range, quite low knockback and two damage. Typical.
F Smash - Punch. This is as powerful as Lucas's Up Smash and as laggy as Meta Knight's down smash. Oh wait. This is as laggy as Lucas's up smash and as powerful as Sing. Sorry 'bout that up there.
D Smash - Stamping Feet. He stamps his feet. It does absolutely nothing but serve as a taunt.
Aerials are all kicks of some sort.
Nair - Kick. He kicks somewhere.
Fair - He kicks forward
Bair - He kicks backwards but fails.
Uair - He kicks himself in the balls by trying to kick upwards.
Dair - He kicks downwards five times weakly.
Neutral Special - Shoe Take Off
He takes off is shoes. Then, after the ten seconds during which he unties them to do that, he throws them for two damage each. Wow. High lag and range.
Side Special - Spork
He takes out a plastic dirty spork, from his pocket, and throws it forward. It makes the opponent flinch. Aww, it stops taunts! Oh well.
Up Special - Upper Slap
He slaps upwards, doing absolutely nothing.
Down Special - Counter
He strikes a counterish pose, but it does nothing but make him even more susceptible to attacks.
RANDOM NOTE: He can't hang on to edges for more than a second and can't pull himself up without a rope or anything, which he doesn't have. Unless someone helps him up. But they won't, besides his granny. but she only appears when he trips. O WELL!
Final Smash - Unrealistic Kid
He turns into Lucas, Ness, or TL for the rest of the match. Yay, not such a bad character any more.
He has no grab, or he does, but they break out immediately. Thus, no throws! Or pummel! Jigglypuff takes a second to get out, but he still can't do anything, he's to shocked that Jigglypuff is real. He thought she was only in games!
EXTRAS: His taunts are him talking about stuff.
He has no win poses because he never wins. If he does, the game crashes.
His loss pose is a tantrum.
ODD THING: He can OHKO GaW with any move. GaW is only 2D!