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Make Your Move 4

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Kholdstare

Kholdstare

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Here's a few font. Put the word that represents the font inside the parentheses and remove the * from the tags. [*FONT=" "][/FONT*]

Kingdom Hearts / . @ !

Triforce

Tron
 
emergency

emergency

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I guess this would be the time to post up a MYM Newcomer sample. I thank you for the welcome, I hope I don't disappoint anyone.

*You might not understand who Usagi and Sâme. But picture a mad psycho bunny, and a big shark that will eat anything.

This is my WIPMYM. Pleinair from Disgaea (or many other Cameos in games created by Nippon Ichi Software). I apologize for the disorganization. I just copy and pasted the passage from Wordpad so no fancy stuff. just bolded texts. There is a hard to see picture of Pleinair in my sig.

Down Special - Usagi Drop
Pleinair will pull from her clothes Usagi. and hold it. So you can throw it like a normal item. The impact itself is small. But the side effects is quite large. Once the Usagi hits your foe. They will recieve the Lip Stick status.after 5 seconds or if Usagi is knocked off. He will then drop to the floor. and become a obstruction that walks/jumps around the stage and repeats the process this prance lasts about 7 seconds, and the timer restarts if Usagi is being used. Usagi himself has his special ability! When he is walking around the stage. If you attack Usagi in anyway. The damage and knockback is stored until it's used or Usagi is overfilled with power he explodes. The maximum damage he can hold it 50%. So once you've beaten down on him a bit. Execute a move that Pleiniar uses Usagi. The attack will then be unleashed. Throwing him as a normal item will not result in the added bonus. It's a one time thing, before you have to power up again. And another unexpected twist! There will be a 10% chance that you will materialize a Prinny. A demon penguein that explodes when thrown. The Prinny works like a Bom-bomb. Except it will never walk on the ground. All Pleinair has to do it throw it. a boom. It has massive knockback and does tremendous damage. If Usagi manages his way into Same's Spit he will add 2% of damage to his attacks, and no longer will be able to be grabbed. She can only have 3 Usagis on the field at once. But the current Usagis on the field will disappear as soon as another one is deployed.

Lip Stick Effect: 4% per second , Being hit by Usagi: 3%, Prinny 26%!!

Edit: This never happened D: I hope. I AM SO ASHAMED!
I am sorry for all the confusing stuff. Some of her attacks go hand in hand with other moves.
 
Red Arremer

Red Arremer

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emergency said:
Down Special - Usagi Drop
Click to expand...
That is quite an extensive move description you got there... I hope you are planning on overworking that? It's pretty confusing, as you have several sentences which are not connected to what you want to describe. It's really confusing. If I may suggest you for following moves to be written:
First, tell what the move looks like, what the animation is. Make a description how Plenair gets out Usagi and throws it, etc. What the blast looks like, size, range.
After you've done that, explain how the effects of the move are, as in damage, knockback.
Then add in the special traits, with Usagi walking around the stage and whatnot.

I normally add as last part what the uses of this move are, but that's not necessary.

I hope I was able to help you with that. You seem to be a very promising newcomer, and I honestly want to support you in improving. Since this move is so utterly long - and all of your moves have this size - many people will tl;dr it.
 
emergency

emergency

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@ Kit & Spade

I see...Let me see what I can do.

I am sorry. :(

I shall simpify it to the point where it's complex and understandable.
 
Red Arremer

Red Arremer

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emergency said:
@ Kit & Spade

I see...Let me see what I can do.

I am sorry. :(

I shall simpify it to the point where it's complex and understandable.
Click to expand...
You know what? Since you're really promising, I'll give you an example of a complex move explained simply. I'll use Lyon's Summon, since that's one of the more extensive moves I've made. I hope that'll help you improve a bit.

Down B: Summon
A ritual circle appears below Lyon, then a blast of wind (effect!) blows inside the circle, making Lyon's robes and hair flutter. Then, a slightly transparent human shape with a slight blue colour appears (it looks a bit similar to an alloy) and steps out of the circle. From this second on, the Phantom Warrior is in the game. The circle disappears, and Lyon goes back to his normal stance. This move cannot be used in the air and has quite a lot of lag. Now for the description of the Phantom Warrior, no?
The Phantom Warrior basically works similar to an Assist Trophy. Being AI controlled, he uses a handaxe to attack, has average speed and jumping abilities. He cannot recieve any knockback above flinching. Every knockback above flinching will recieve in flinching, anyway. The Phantom Warrior goes around and hunts down enemy players, if there's more than one, he goes for the closest. He has one ground attack, one air attack and a projectile, making him a bit versatile. The Phantom Warrior has no damage counter, but rather around 20 HP. If the HP deplete, he will simply disappear. If he is knocked off a platform (which is highly unlikely due to him not being able to recieve knockback), and falls into a pit, he will die regardless. There can only be one Phantom Warrior at a time, if the one currently on the field is disappeared, Lyon is able to summon another one. If he tries to summon a Phantom Warrior while one is already on the field, Lyon blows up in a explosion of dark magic, flinching himself and doing 5% damage to himself, and only himself.

Attacks:
Ground Attack: Axe Swing
Simple as it sounds. The Phantom Warrior sweeps his axe in front of him once, doing static 10% damage and average knockback. The move comes out fairly quick and has decent range.

Aerial Attack: Axe Slash
Uh... yeah, just the same type of creative naming, har har. Anyway, while doing this move, the Phantom Warrior slashes his axe diagonally from his front to below him, creating a hitbox from his chest to his legs. The move does static 10% damage and average knockback downwards. It is a bit slower than the ground attack, but has better range.

Projectile: Throwing Knife
Simple as all of Phantom Warrior's attack, he throws a knife in front of him. It goes in a straight line, only flinches an opponent and does static 5% damage. He can do this move both in the air and on the ground. There can be 3 knives on the field at a time, they have infinite range and only disappear when hitting an obstacle. They also have the speed of one of Falco's blaster shots.
 
emergency

emergency

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Spadefox said:
You know what? Since you're really promising, I'll give you an example of a complex move explained simply. I'll use Lyon's Summon, since that's one of the more extensive moves I've made. I hope that'll help you improve a bit.

Down B: Summon
A ritual circle appears below Lyon, then a blast of wind (effect!) blows inside the circle, making Lyon's robes and hair flutter. Then, a slightly transparent human shape with a slight blue colour appears (it looks a bit similar to an alloy) and steps out of the circle. From this second on, the Phantom Warrior is in the game. The circle disappears, and Lyon goes back to his normal stance. This move cannot be used in the air and has quite a lot of lag. Now for the description of the Phantom Warrior, no?
The Phantom Warrior basically works similar to an Assist Trophy. Being AI controlled, he uses a handaxe to attack, has average speed and jumping abilities. He cannot recieve any knockback above flinching. Every knockback above flinching will recieve in flinching, anyway. The Phantom Warrior goes around and hunts down enemy players, if there's more than one, he goes for the closest. He has one ground attack, one air attack and a projectile, making him a bit versatile. The Phantom Warrior has no damage counter, but rather around 20 HP. If the HP deplete, he will simply disappear. If he is knocked off a platform (which is highly unlikely due to him not being able to recieve knockback), and falls into a pit, he will die regardless. There can only be one Phantom Warrior at a time, if the one currently on the field is disappeared, Lyon is able to summon another one. If he tries to summon a Phantom Warrior while one is already on the field, Lyon blows up in a explosion of dark magic, flinching himself and doing 5% damage to himself, and only himself.

Attacks:
Ground Attack: Axe Swing
Simple as it sounds. The Phantom Warrior sweeps his axe in front of him once, doing static 10% damage and average knockback. The move comes out fairly quick and has decent range.

Aerial Attack: Axe Slash
Uh... yeah, just the same type of creative naming, har har. Anyway, while doing this move, the Phantom Warrior slashes his axe diagonally from his front to below him, creating a hitbox from his chest to his legs. The move does static 10% damage and average knockback downwards. It is a bit slower than the ground attack, but has better range.

Projectile: Throwing Knife
Simple as all of Phantom Warrior's attack, he throws a knife in front of him. It goes in a straight line, only flinches an opponent and does static 5% damage. He can do this move both in the air and on the ground. There can be 3 knives on the field at a time, they have infinite range and only disappear when hitting an obstacle. They also have the speed of one of Falco's blaster shots.
Click to expand...
I am glad to see that I show potential, but I think you might be overestimating me.

I feel so ashamed to give my first impression and it seems to lack lots of things.

I need to work better at explaining things.
 
D

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In case you don't go on the chat, I've announced the next moveset I plan to make:

 
Chief Mendez

Chief Mendez

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Okay so maybe this might possibly be kind of a joke moveset. Maybe.

G*O*R*D*O

*​

A: Gordo gets tough. Any foes touching it take moderate knockback and are dealt a hefty 10% damage.

Side A: Gordo turns. Normally, Gordo faces forward, toward the player. With this, it turns 90°, and any foe touching Gordo is pierced by it's spikes and dragged along for the ride. They're then spat out behind Gordo, taking set knockback and 10% damage.

Up A: Gordo drops. Falling to the ground, Gordo bounces off of it, then, using the momentum, rises twice as high into the air as it is tall. Any foe unlucky enough to be caught in the flight path takes 10% damage and great knockback.

Down A: Gordo rests. Dropping to the ground for a quick snooze, any foe beneath it will be crushed. No knockback, but the foe is trapped beneath Gordo for a short time, taking 5% each second.

Dash: Gordo continually damages while he dashes. Any foe that touches it takes good knockback and around 10% damage.

*​

Smash: Gordo smash. Drawing on the pent up anger of a life spent without a friend, Gordo's spikes extend sheer inches outward from their normal size, and any unfortunate victim in the vicinity is dealt extreme knockback and 20% damage.

Up Smash: Gordo love. Spotting someone that isn't running away in fear of it's spikes, Gordo gravitates toward the nearest player, joy plastered over it's face. Unfortunately, Gordo's spikes mean it is not to be, since as soon as the targeted character touches Gordo, they are knocked far away and take 10% damage.

Down Smash: Gordo sorrow. As the sudden realization that Gordo will never know a lover's embrace dawns on it, Gordo sinks to the ground and lets the tears flow. Any foe that the waterworks douse is temporarily overcome with pity for the lonely creature, and stands where they are, in a dizzy state of sorrow. No damage, no knockback.

*​

Air: Gordo spin. Rotating like a pinwheel, Gordo's spikes poke any foe near and drag them around with the spin, dropping them off after it's over with a nice 10% damage as a parting present.

Ahead Air: If Gordo is moving forward while airborne, and an enemy comes in physical contact with it...they are in for some pain. Gordo's sharp spikes deal great knock of the back variety, as well as 10% damage.

Behind Air: As Gordo moves backward through the air, it constantly "attacks." Any unwitting adversary that touches it will be sent flying along with their newfound 10% damage.

Up Air: All the while Gordo jumps into the air, it creates a constant aura of damage, meaning any player silly enough to touch Gordo will take an unheard-of 10% damage, as well as solid knockback.

Down Air: All things must come to an end. Gordo's brief time in the sunny sky comes to a close, but fortunately for Gordo (and bad for any foe beneath), if Gordo can body check an opponent while dropping, Gordo will deal 10% knockback and good damage (or something like that).

*​

Grab: If a foe is stupid enough to run into Gordo while it's just sitting around, Gordo's sharp prongs will automatically latch onto them, leaving them at Gordo's mercy. Gordo could "grab" more than one opponent, but only if they're stupid enough to get caught.

F. Throw: Gordo wheel. Gordo rotates slowily in a circle, like a giant, spiked wheel. The terrible friction created from it's spikes slowly sailing through the air around it create an electric charge, shocking a caught enemy with surprising knockback and unforeseen damage (10%).

B. Throw: Gordo has something caught in it's throat. What's a light, throat-clearing cough to Gordo is a terrible, calamitous shockwave to everyone else. As expected, such a powerful attack deals suitably terrible knockback and damage somewhere between 10% and 10%.

U. Throw: Some airborne allergen tickles Gordo's senses, causing a sudden, violent sneeze. The lightning-quick maneuver sends shockwaves down Gordo's spines, blasting any trapped foes upward. Also they take 10% damage.

D: Throw: Gordo tired. After rotating to the side, placing it's victim directly below it, Gordo falls fast asleep, crushing the foe between a hard place and a Gordo. They're sent flying after taking 11% damage.

*​

B: Preserve the environment! Ack! Gordo just realized it left the oven on! In it's shock, one to three of it's spines launch off of it's body and go straight out, dealing okay knockback and 5% damage to any foe they touch. They travel straight out in the direction that particular spine was facing for a while before Gordo realizes what's happend and zooms off to retrieve them.

Side B: Community service! Gordo loves it's community. Being such a good citizen, it regularly takes leisurely rolls around the neighborhood, using it's rolling spikes to pick up stray pieces of trash (i.e. litter). Unfortunately this often leads to unhappy accidents, with Gordo unknowingly rolling over it's fellow neighbors. You have no idea how much money it costs the average fellow neighbor for surgery after taking good knockback and 10% damage.

Up B: Morning stretches! Waking up to the world, Gordo lifts it's spikes above it's head, ready to face a brand-new day. Every rose has it's iron thorns, however, and for Gordo, even such a normal, everyday action can be deadly. Or at least, goodknockbackand10%damagely. Gordo's morning pep also serves to push it several feet into the air.

Down B: Amnesia! Gordo for some reason forgets where, who, or why it is. It sits down to ponder the matter. During this time, unaware of it's surroundings and totally engrossed in thought, a smart-minded foe might be able to kick Gordo around like a makeshift Soccer Ball. Although unlike that silly rubber-made sphere, Gordo's fearful spines make it a much more deadly piece of sports equipment. Fiery, explosive Futbol damage? Pah. Try good knockback and 10% damage.

***​

Final Smash: Giant Gordo

Gordo realizes it's true destiny: grow to gigiantic size and get in everyone else's way. Why should Gordo care about other people? What has anyone else ever done for Gordo? Gordo's always just a tool for them--just something they can throw around to deal 10% damage and good knockback. But did anyone ever ask Gordo what Gordo wanted? No. They all just assume that they can take advantage of Gordo. It's so unfair. Well, Gordo will show them. Gordo will get so big, and so huge, and so tall that nobody will ever again be able to use Gordo like that!

Gordo grows, and grows, and grows...until it's the same size as a Puffed Up Jigglypuff. Gordo stays where it is, causing any foe that touches it to take a ghastly 11% damage and better-than-good knockback.

...Yet, at heart, Gordo is a good person. After a few players have been hurt from running into Gordo, Gordo's heart opens up, and it returns to normal size, apologetic as ever.​
 
Chief Mendez

Chief Mendez

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dancingfrogman said:
Click to expand...
I'm so super glad you used the original instead of the Advance Heroes version. Awesome moveset all around, though I won't voice any concerns here.

Save that for the probable review. ;)

TheSundanceKid said:
You really shouldn't use massive text to make your moveset look longer...
Click to expand...
Actually I rather liked it like that. It certainly stood out, anyways. And if the text was regularly-sized, I have a feeling the set would be painfully short...

MasterWarlord said:
Click to expand...
It's so...so...so pretty! :bee:

Spadefox said:
Poor Spade...
Click to expand...
It's okay buddy! All this means is that we both just need to make Kirby movesets! :bee:

Here, I'll take...hmm, how about...yeah. There we go. Look at that, I'm ahead of myself.
 
flyinfilipino

flyinfilipino

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I just skimmed the last few pages and caught some movesets, so....

@dancingfrogman's Undead Hero: Wicked!

@princesspeachluvr13's Vexen: Nice one! But no...tilt attacks?

@MasterWarlord's Capsule J2: Yay Kirby! Cool!

@Chief Mendezzz's Gordo: LOL 10%
 
Kholdstare

Kholdstare

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flyinfilipino said:
I'm really sensing a Kirby bias in this contest.
Click to expand...
Fanservice. That's because Kirby characters are magical, interesting and original. Bias and love is what MYM is all about. Well, maybe not. There are many series that receive a lot of attention, but have no originality in their characters. There's one I can't think of at the moment that's a bad culprit...
 
Chris Lionheart

Chris Lionheart

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Kholdstare said:
Fanservice. That's because Kirby characters are magical, interesting and original. Bias and love is what MYM is all about. Well, maybe not. There are many series that receive a lot of attention, but have no originality in their characters. There's one I can't think of at the moment that's a bad culprit...
Click to expand...
Cheap shot....

Keep the hate out of this thread.

*Wishes this thread had a ban button like chat....*

Oh and FE doesn't receive as much attention as it deserves. Its an underrated series.
 
Kholdstare

Kholdstare

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Chris Lionheart said:
Cheap shot....

Keep the hate out of this thread.

*Wishes this thread had a ban button like chat....*

Oh and FE doesn't receive as much attention as it deserves. Its an underrated series.
Click to expand...
Oh, THAT'S the one I was trying to think of.

Thanks, Chris.
 
Chief Mendez

Chief Mendez

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Iron thorns. What's so strange about that? Just because there's someone with a similar username doesn't mean I can't use the term, right? Or hey, maybe that is a miniscule sendup to the girl? I don't know, I didn't write the thing.

...Or did I?

Also @Kholdstare: WHAT IS UP WITH THE RANDOM "u" IN YOUR SIGNATURE IT'S BEEN BUGGING ME SINCE I CAME BACK

I'm not a Kirby fan. I haven't enjoyed any of the games since Nightmare in Dreamland.Honestly Gordo took me like, half an hour to make.
 
flyinfilipino

flyinfilipino

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Chief Mendez said:
I'm not a Kirby fan. I haven't enjoyed any of the games since Nightmare in Dreamland.Honestly Gordo took me like, half an hour to make.
Click to expand...
Play Kirby Super Star! Ultra!

I wish I had as much creative motivation as you, Chief, to churn out even quality joke movesets.

I've been studying up on everyone's Kirby movesets for this contest....
 
Chief Mendez

Chief Mendez

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I did, and frankly I wasn't impressed. It's the same game I played ten years ago on my SNES, only with a new coat of paint and extras that ranged from ******** to okay-but-not-worth-$35. So instead of buying my own copy I bought a real platformer.
Also Gordo isn't really that inventive. All but one of his aerials, for example, are the same thing in different directions. So really, I guess I'm just good at varying my words?
 
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