Corrupt-a-wish!

[Jiggly]

Granted, but now you are dead so you don't live

I wish that no wishes could ever be corrupted ever again

 

[KingofPhantoms]

Granted, but this one wish doesn't count towards that, and the result is you being transformed into a lamp-dwelling genie to replace the current one, doomed to eternally grant the wishes of others.

I wish I had more motivation to go outside more often.

 

[Matoi Knight]

WISH GRANTED! But the drawback is that everyone you meet outside is a complete jerk to you.

I wish I got 80-100% on my marks at school.

 

[The Fail Tracer]

Granted, but they're only graded that way because the teachers favor you over other students and that's the only reason.

I wish for the next poster to wish for something stupid.

 

[The Stoopid Unikorn]

Granted, but it's so stupid that corrupting it will only make it better.

I wish sugar would have less sugar

 

[Downdraft]

Granted, it contains a mutated form of sugar that's toxic, which you unfortunately ingest.

I wish the rest of my RWBY pawns were here.

 

[The Stoopid Unikorn]

Granted, but they hatch a evil scheme to betray you and the guy in my avatar will most likely be part of it.

I wish Season 3 of RWBY would come sooner.

 

[KingofPhantoms]

Granted, but it only lasts for a single episode.

I wish I had a chocolate bar.

 

[Winner-Bit]

Granted -- it's a full service cocktail bar.

I wish my computer were faster.

 

[The Stoopid Unikorn]

Granted, but instead of having a faster processor, it grows legs and runs away, technically making it "faster"

I wish days were longer than 24 hours

 

[Iceweasel]

Granted, but there's less days in a week. Still 168 hours/week.

I wish that Xenogears was remade for the Wii U.

 

[Winner-Bit]

Granted, but there's an unavoidable bug in the final level that causes your Wii U to crash and delete the save data.

I wish I knew what cats were thinking when they watch something you can't see from across the room.

 

[The Stoopid Unikorn]

Granted, but what they think will traumatize you

I wish that Mortal Kombat X releases on PS3 before E3

 

[Iceweasel]

Granted, but there's an unavoidable bug in the final level that causes your Wii U to crash and delete the save data.

I wish I knew what cats were thinking when they watch something you can't see from across the room.

Granted, but fatalities are DLC.

I wish that food would make itself.

 

[KingofPhantoms]

Granted, but it also eats itself.

I wish I had retractable claws.

 

[A Very Nice Dishwasher]

Granted. When you retract them, you bleed internally and die.
I wish the dlc was out now.

 

[Iceweasel]

Granted, but trying to use specials crashes the game.

I wish that mechanical pencils always had lead in them.

 

[Winner-Bit]

Granted -- the internal mechsanism of every mechanical pencil is now an inter-dimensional portal to the molten-hot Lead Planet. When the lead is extracted, it creates a vortex that sucks up everything around it, transporting it to the planet, and dropping it in, encasing it in lead for eternity.

I wish life ran on my own schedule.

 

[A Very Nice Dishwasher]

Granted. You can no longer control your life, and thus you brush your teeth with rat poison and die.
I wish for fish on a dish.

 

[KingofPhantoms]

Granted, but it's an improperly prepared Pufferfish.

I wish I had a hat that gave me the ability to fly.

 

[Winner-Bit]

Granted. You don the hat, it melds into your skull, brainwashes you, and spawns demon wings on your back. You work for Iblis now.

I wish I had an unbreakable pair of headphones.

 

[A Very Nice Dishwasher]

Granted. You now have 2 telephones that are shaped like human heads.
I wish I could read yellow text easier.

 

[The Stoopid Unikorn]

Granted, but all the others colors will look black to make it easier to read yellow text.

I wish the Mario Kart 8 DLC would come sooner

 

[A Very Nice Dishwasher]

Granted. Pink Gold Daisy DLC is out today! Only $379.99!
I wish for more money.

 

[Winner-Bit]

Granted. You gain one yen.

I wish Little Mac got buffed in v 1.0.6.

 

[Iceweasel]

Granted, he has infinite super armor at all times. Confronted with a character that can't lose except by suicide, the Smash community bans him until the Fighter Ballot DLC characters come out and Mac gets nerfed to be more worthless than Pichu.


I wish that The Who got back together, dead members and all.

 

[Winner-Bit]

Granted. The dead members come back as a team of zombies. Pete Townshend is bitten, and now leads the group, wielding a jagged half of a guitar. The Who has now become The What.

I wish Quote were in Sm4sh.

 

[KingofPhantoms]

Granted, but he's given stats and moves that ultimately make him the worst character in the game.

I wish to spend five nights at Freddy's and live.

 

[The Stoopid Unikorn]

Granted, but you're Springtrap from FNAF3.

I wish of something that would actually be better if corrupted

 

[Winner-Bit]

Granted. You get an NES game loaded into Vinesauce's ROM corruptor. (google it if you need a reference)

I wish I knew what the J and V in "JV5" meant.

 

[Iceweasel]

Granted. You get an NES game loaded into Vinesauce's ROM corruptor. (google it if you need a reference)

I wish I knew what the J and V in "JV5" meant.

Granted, but you get JV5'd in every match you play from here on.

I wish that Wii U games had an option to output at 4:3.

 

[The Stoopid Unikorn]

Granted, but everytime it is set at 4:3, it crashes

I wish for less crappy games on non-Nintendo consoles

 

[Iceweasel]

Granted. Every game from non-Nintendo consoles are so perfect, Nintendo ends up losing enough sales to go out of business. Thus no new Smash Bros, Mario, Legend of Zelda, Fire Emblem, Donkey Kong, or Metroid games, ever.

I wish that I had a better gaming rig.

 

[Winner-Bit]

Granted. Your system now sports a parasol. It keeps you dry when you play video games in the rain.

I wish I were exactly who I wanted to be.

 

[Iceweasel]

Granted. The current you ceases to be and you assume the life of the person you want to be, causing much sadness to your friends, family, pets, and significant other. From their perspective, you've simply vanished off the face of the earth.

I wish that there was more magicpunk in video games.

 

[Winner-Bit]

Granted. There are now so many releases focusing on magic-punk that everyone grows sick of it and the gaming market crashes.

I wish I knew why the first thing they ask on the Smash Ballot is your gender. (seriously what the hell is up with that)

 

[The Stoopid Unikorn]

Granted, but the answer tramatizes you and you eventually become a sociopath and go on a rampage.

I wish that the Internet was always safe, no mater the site.

 

[Iceweasel]

Granted. Creepers that want to harm people, having been removed from the Internet, are released into the world in droves. There's no more Craigslist killers, but you may get shanked if you go to your mailbox at night.

I wish that I didn't need glasses to see well.

 

[KingofPhantoms]

Granted, instead you can see well because of a sudden abnormally large size increase in your eyeballs.

I wish to visit Mars for just one day without any concern of being stuck there or being unable to breathe.

 

[The Stoopid Unikorn]

Granted, but these concerns are still present, you just don't care about them.

I wish my dog would sleep anywhere but on top of my bed. (It's cute, but that dog takes so much space.)