The Unhappy Thread

[MewtwoMaster2002]

What @Holder of the Heel said was good. At least, I think what he had to say was better than anything I could come up with. A job is something you can eventually get if you keep trying to get one. It's not something that just comes to you. I've been looking for around a year now, but it helps that I've had some temp jobs and now a part-time job while looking.

As for relationships with other people, that is hard. I sort of feel the same way, but I know I shouldn't expect others to make the effort. I make some effort to keep in touch with others as well.

I'm sure you will find a way. In my opinion, suicide should never be an option.

 

[FinalStarmen]

1) Only recently, I feel like I am constantly stepped over by everyone in the Character Discussion Threads. If I offer a suggestion, for example, or state an opinion, I am ridiculed for it, even by the well-respected. I do not know why, my offerings or opinions can hardly be considered offensive. It is not their disagreement that bothers me, but the manner of their disagreements. I just do not know why.

2) It is as if I cannot properly contribute to conversations. If I try to add something to a discussion, or even start one, I am usually ignored, or barely mentioned. Even if I do start a discussion, it lasts for two replies before the next one arrives, which lasts far longer. I am a ghost that wanders about without gravity, it seems.

Some appreciation would be nice.

 

[SomewhatMystia]

My bird (quaker parrot/monk parakeet) just bit the everliving **** out of my hand.

I know that this is really, REALLY minor compared to everything else here, but I'm annoyed because I thought he was getting over biting people. or at least getting over biting me

 

[Saikyoshi]

[[blanked out]]

 

[Sen. Sawft]

I was at work, getting ready to start my 30 minute break. Everything was just dandy and I was having a good time for a change.

I sit down, check my phone, and read a text that one of my close friends was killed in a hit-and-run incident.

 

[Saikyoshi]

I was at work, getting ready to start my 30 minute break. Everything was just dandy and I was having a good time for a change.

I sit down, check my phone, and read a text that one of my close friends was killed in a hit-and-run incident.

...oh man...

I'm so sorry that happened. I wish there was something I could do.

 

[MewtwoMaster2002]

I was at work, getting ready to start my 30 minute break. Everything was just dandy and I was having a good time for a change.

I sit down, check my phone, and read a text that one of my close friends was killed in a hit-and-run incident.

That is terrible. Condolences to you.

 

[Sen. Sawft]

...oh man...

I'm so sorry that happened. I wish there was something I could do.

Thanks. Means a lot to me.

 

[Sen. Sawft]

That is terrible. Condolences to you.

Thanks. I appreciate it.

 

[Redd]

Thanks. I appreciate it.

Sorry to hear that. My condolences sir. =(

 

[Chronodiver Lokii]

sorry to hear that, man

 

[Saikyoshi]

I've done a lot of complaining about complaining lately. There's a reason for that, though; I'm severely depressed in general. Even small, really unimportant issues send me spiraling because that's how unstable and vulnerable I am.

I talk to therapists. I take enough antidepressants to drown a horse. But none of it helps. It only makes it worse, but nobody will believe me.

 

[WindozeNT]

I've done a lot of complaining about complaining lately. There's a reason for that, though; I'm severely depressed in general. Even small, really unimportant issues send me spiraling because that's how unstable and vulnerable I am.

I talk to therapists. I take enough antidepressants to drown a horse. But none of it helps. It only makes it worse, but nobody will believe me.

Though I never got to talk to any therapists. I currently have a year's worth of antidepressants though.

 

[Drowzee64]

^^With you both on that. I'm so jealous of people who actually have success with anti-depressants.

I can't wait until my main therapist comes back from vacation. This substitute is helpful in her own way, but something about her just irks me.

My workplace has not given me any hours in 3 weeks. I talked to all 3 managers on staff today, and none of them had any idea what was going on. This is the last straw, I'm going to start applying for different jobs.

 

[WindozeNT]

^^With you both on that. I'm so jealous of people who actually have success with anti-depressants.

I can't wait until my main therapist comes back from vacation. This substitute is helpful in her own way, but something about her just irks me.

My workplace has not given me any hours in 3 weeks. I talked to all 3 managers on staff today, and none of them had any idea what was going on. This is the last straw, I'm going to start applying for different jobs.

Well, that's where the problem is: my antidepressants have a tendency to not work most of the time... Either something overwhelms them or they just flat out decide to not work.

 

[Saikyoshi]

What am I supposed to do, though, since everyone I talk to thinks the answer to the antidepressants not working is "take even more antidepressants"?

I'm sick of all these pills that keep getting shoved at me. I feel like I'm being forcefully turned into a junkie...

 

[Deleted member]

Just got finished completely with all of my college Orientation stuff only to realize during the program that everyone in the Honors Engineering Program of the Engineering College (where my major, Computer Sciences and Engineering is) is at the very least a year ahead of me in math (and in some cases programming) while being the same age as me.

I don't really understand now why I was even admitted to the College Honors program when everyone else in Honors is as such ^.

I feel incredibly inadequate.

 

[MewtwoMaster2002]

Just got finished completely with all of my college Orientation stuff only to realize during the program that everyone in the Honors Engineering Program of the Engineering College (where my major, Computer Sciences and Engineering is) is at the very least a year ahead of me in math (and in some cases programming) while being the same age as me.

I don't really understand now why I was even admitted to the College Honors program when everyone else in Honors is as such ^.

I feel incredibly inadequate.

Maybe they saw a lot of potential in you to do well and catch up.

 

[SomewhatMystia]

Or maybe you're *really* good in other subjects, but have math as a weak point.

 

[Deleted member]

Or maybe you're *really* good in other subjects, but have math as a weak point.

To elucidate, I got a 5 (highest score) on the AP Calculus AB exam (equivalent to Calculus I).

It just so happens that everyone in the Honors Engineering program (and probably just general Honors) had taken PSEO math (what you take after exhausting your high school's math offerings) or AP Calculus BC (the step after Calculus AB) while in high school, the latter which my high school didn't even offer and the former of which I was the level below (I had some student in my grade who took PSEO in high school, they were the ones that took Calc. AB a year before everyone else, they were essentially a year ahead).

It's pathetic really because Math and Science were/are my best subjects and I'm still way behind everyone else.

I used to think I was smart because I could handle 4 AP classes this past year (my senior year) and still get straight A's while having strong commitments to tennis and lifting. But as I've come to realize, the majority of kids in the Honors program have taken at the very least as many as I did (I expected them to be equal), many of them took AP classes (aside from Calc. BC) that my school didn't even offer in addition to the AP classes that I had taken.


Turns out everyone around me is, to be frank, way out of my league.

 

[MewtwoMaster2002]

To elucidate, I got a 5 (highest score) on the AP Calculus AB exam (equivalent to Calculus I).

It just so happens that everyone in the Honors Engineering program (and probably just general Honors) had taken PSEO math (what you take after exhausting your high school's math offerings) or AP Calculus BC (the step after Calculus AB) while in high school, the latter which my high school didn't even offer and the former of which I was the level below (I had some student in my grade who took PSEO in high school, they were the ones that took Calc. AB a year before everyone else, they were essentially a year ahead).

It's pathetic really because Math and Science were/are my best subjects and I'm still way behind everyone else.

I used to think I was smart because I could handle 4 AP classes this past year (my senior year) and still get straight A's while having strong commitments to tennis and lifting. But as I've come to realize, the majority of kids in the Honors program have taken at the very least as many as I did (I expected them to be equal), many of them took AP classes (aside from Calc. BC) that my school didn't even offer in addition to the AP classes that I had taken.


Turns out everyone around me is, to be frank, way out of my league.

Don't give up just because of that. You can catch up with the classes. Plus in college, you can schedule your classes at your own leisure, so you could pretty much catch up if you are smart with your time.

 

[Deleted member]

Don't give up just because of that. You can catch up with the classes. Plus in college, you can schedule your classes at your own leisure, so you could pretty much catch up if you are smart with your time.

As it turns out, the Honors Engineering students (at least for my major, probably for the others as well) didn't even schedule their own classes, we circled the classes we were planning to take ("planning" meaning choosing among our required options based on past subject credit/knowledge) and then turned in the sheet for the staff to schedule the classes for us.

So as it stands I won't know what my schedule will look like for at least a week and even then I'm assigned to take all that I can relating to my major/area of study.

...which everyone else is doing as well...

 

[Lore]

Why are you in the honors classes? Can you just do a regular engineering class schedule?

On another note, talk to your advisor about all this. Like, right now. Find out everything you can and talk about your worries.

 

[Grey Belnades]

I'm disappointed Mike "Boss" Ross didn't make it in losers against Taiga in Ultra's bracket.

 

[Creo]

Two people I am acquainted with had recently gotten into a car accident together. . . One of them is now dead, and the other in critical condition, still currently in the hospital. Prior to this incident, I've not been emotionally content for a few months or so (personal related problems), so needless today, things haven't been going great. . .

 

[Zink Imp]

I'm disappointed Mike "Boss" Ross didn't make it in losers against Taiga in Ultra's bracket.

I'm disappointed Daigo "The Beat" Umehara lost to the asshole Filipino Champ.

 

[Saikyoshi]

Two people I am acquainted with had recently gotten into a car accident together. . . One of them is now dead, and the other in critical condition, still currently in the hospital. Prior to this incident, I've not been emotionally content for a few months or so (personal related problems), so needless today, things haven't been going great. . .

Agh... They're in my prayers. You too. I hope things go better...

 

[Rie Sonomura]

This isn't my proudest confession but:

Spoiler: mentions of disabilities and vomiting

I have a behavioral disability that's been with me since I was young. Let's just say that. But...the thing is I'm 25, and I still find myself acting in unacceptable ways when I'm put on the spot.

Let's just say that...yesterday, I reacted terribly when my mom made something for dinner that had something I was allergic to (not deathly allergic, but still). I politely refused the first time when she offered, but when I was washing the dishes, she said, "You were missing out. That was good, we loved it" and I just...freaked out. I would rather not say how it went down but...I said terrible things and...
I guess it was a trigger for me, I myself had a bad experience when I was younger when I was literally forced to eat something I couldn't stand, and I ended up vomiting. And since I was allergic to what was in the stuff mom made and I was afraid to face that allergy again I just...
;-;
I want to better myself in so many areas of my life, especially in situations when I'm pressured. But it's so hard for me and I often hurt people I care about. I lose control, and...I don't wanna do that anymore.

In addition, it's not helping me socially. I get clingy and sometimes repetitive/annoying to some people. I lost several friends in May, including one real life friend I met at a social group I used to go to. That friend and I have actually had conflicts in the past. But we always seemed to make up...but not this time. She has a disability too. And...she was just trying so hard to move on without me, getting a boyfriend who later became her fiance. Worse, I feel conflicted about losing her. Part of me feels sad but wants to treasure the good memories...but the other part of me is sealing those memories away and trying to tell myself I am better off without her.

I guess...I just have so many internal conflicts.

 

[Saikyoshi]

This isn't my proudest confession but:

Spoiler: mentions of disabilities and vomiting

I have a behavioral disability that's been with me since I was young. Let's just say that. But...the thing is I'm 25, and I still find myself acting in unacceptable ways when I'm put on the spot.

Let's just say that...yesterday, I reacted terribly when my mom made something for dinner that had something I was allergic to (not deathly allergic, but still). I politely refused the first time when she offered, but when I was washing the dishes, she said, "You were missing out. That was good, we loved it" and I just...freaked out. I would rather not say how it went down but...I said terrible things and...
I guess it was a trigger for me, I myself had a bad experience when I was younger when I was literally forced to eat something I couldn't stand, and I ended up vomiting. And since I was allergic to what was in the stuff mom made and I was afraid to face that allergy again I just...
;-;
I want to better myself in so many areas of my life, especially in situations when I'm pressured. But it's so hard for me and I often hurt people I care about. I lose control, and...I don't wanna do that anymore.

In addition, it's not helping me socially. I get clingy and sometimes repetitive/annoying to some people. I lost several friends in May, including one real life friend I met at a social group I used to go to. That friend and I have actually had conflicts in the past. But we always seemed to make up...but not this time. She has a disability too. And...she was just trying so hard to move on without me, getting a boyfriend who later became her fiance. Worse, I feel conflicted about losing her. Part of me feels sad but wants to treasure the good memories...but the other part of me is sealing those memories away and trying to tell myself I am better off without her.

I guess...I just have so many internal conflicts.

In your defense, that was seriously a **** move on your mom's part. You were absolutely in the right there.

And I know how it feels to be clingy/repetitive/annoying to your friends and wind up losing them - it's something a lot of us just can't help. I don't have any magic solutions, but as for problems with this one friend, maybe you can write the memories down somewhere private? That way you can get them out of your head while still keeping them somewhere they can be treasured? I don't know if it'll help, but it's all I know.

 

[Rie Sonomura]

In your defense, that was seriously a **** move on your mom's part. You were absolutely in the right there.

And I know how it feels to be clingy/repetitive/annoying to your friends and wind up losing them - it's something a lot of us just can't help. I don't have any magic solutions, but as for problems with this one friend, maybe you can write the memories down somewhere private? That way you can get them out of your head while still keeping them somewhere they can be treasured? I don't know if it'll help, but it's all I know.

Spoiler

I mean I know it wasn;t mom's intention to make me panic like that, but...I think now she hopefully realizes not to push boundaries like that anymore. Thing is she's like very old, she grew up in much harsher conditions than people today, being not born in this country. I know she wants to help me but sometimes she just comes across the wrong way. I wanted to rid myself of the pineapple allergy after all, since mom is allergic to some things herself, or was, and got rid of those allergies with therapy. Like I said I panicked cause I too wanted to make myself immune but didn't wanna take any risks...

As for the friend, that does feel like a good solution to write them down in a journal or something. It's also that...for the other friends I lost, I pretty much made them hate me outright when I was never even rude or disrespectful to them...

 

[Saikyoshi]

Spoiler

I mean I know it wasn;t mom's intention to make me panic like that, but...I think now she hopefully realizes not to push boundaries like that anymore. Thing is she's like very old, she grew up in much harsher conditions than people today, being not born in this country. I know she wants to help me but sometimes she just comes across the wrong way.

As for the friend, that does feel like a good solution to write them down in a journal or something. It's also that...for the other friends I lost, I pretty much made them hate me outright when I was never even rude or disrespectful to them...

While I can't do much, I'm glad I was at least able to help a little.

Try to take care.

 

[Creo]

Agh... They're in my prayers. You too. I hope things go better...

Thank you. Regardless of how things turn out, I do appreciate your sympathy.

Spoiler

I mean I know it wasn;t mom's intention to make me panic like that, but...I think now she hopefully realizes not to push boundaries like that anymore. Thing is she's like very old, she grew up in much harsher conditions than people today, being not born in this country. I know she wants to help me but sometimes she just comes across the wrong way.

As for the friend, that does feel like a good solution to write them down in a journal or something. It's also that...for the other friends I lost, I pretty much made them hate me outright when I was never even rude or disrespectful to them...

I don't mean to provoke negativity into you or anything, but if someone grew to hate you outright (in this case, your other friends that are now lost), and, as you had stated, you were not ever rude or disrespectful towards them, then are they people worth keeping in your life? I understand that mentally, perceiving friendship and what once was isn't something most people can just disregard at will, but in return, it doesn't seem like any effort was made by them towards you, either. I'm not necessarily giving you advice, or expecting you to follow through with what I've said, I'm just speaking from a personal perspective; I would rather not have a friend then have a bad friend / a friend who doesn't care.

 

[PsychoIncarnate]

I feel like I don't have a place in this world

All I can do is struggle through life with the fear of death hanging over me until I finally do die

Life feels more like torture and constant fear

 

[Pyra]

My parents are getting a separation after more than half a year of me stressing over that happening trying to get them to stay together for the benefit of my little brothers.

Needless to say, I closed Fire Emblem when my dad told me in the middle of a battle.

 

[MewtwoMaster2002]

My parents are getting a separation after more than half a year of me stressing over that happening trying to get them to stay together for the benefit of my little brothers.

Needless to say, I closed Fire Emblem when my dad told me in the middle of a battle.

That's sad. Counseling didn't work? I hope things will work out.

 

[Pyra]

That's sad. Counseling didn't work? I hope things will work out.

Thank you. They can't afford counseling and I'd rather not go into the reason for them getting a separation... but it is a totally valid reason.

I just witnessed my mother cutting herself on my front porch.

I spend a lot of my time swallowing all my emotions involving my parents, but it only proves to fuel my anger issues at smaller things. I need to stay strong for my brothers though.

 

[Pega-pony Princess]

My mom called me a few mintues ago. My 90 year grandmother just passed away....I feel sad. My grandmother had been suffering for a long time from depression, but it wasn't until a few years ago that she had a stroke and got a lot worse. As if that wasn't enough, her depression could've been lessened had my uncle not been so stubborn, i.e, prevented her from taking medicine. I never really got the chance to bond with my grandmother before she just..became broken. I can only remember a few instances when she had been whole, back when I was a child. It's horrible honestly. And yet, I can't bring myself to cry that much for her. I love her, am glad she's been released from her suffering, but I just feel detached about it all. I never got the chance to really know her...

 

[Rie Sonomura]

I have just been scammed lately. I have been having trouble finding a job for so long (being a woman majoring in Information Technology makes it even harder imo) and I guess I was so desperate for money that when these people who apparently found my uncle's resume (when he used to live with us when his relationship with his wife wasn't so good. it has since improved and he moved back to Puerto Rico but anyway) on some site emailed me with a work from home job offer, I took it hook line and sinker. Aaaaand it was a massive bank fraud, and they (as supposedly retailers) were even ripping off some customers by selling them products that weren't as advertised.

I just feel awful being taken for a sucker and having to be unemployed like this, and the resolution with eBay/PayPal/the banks is incredibly stressful too. I wish I could sue them, but they're based in Poland. They do however, have a warehouse branch in CA but idk if that can be sued...

Plus, because of this mom is now more suspicious of my online interactions...but here I'd say she kinda has good reason to be. But I'm really sad and hopeless right now and don't know what to do...

 

[Smooth Criminal]

You done goofed. =/

Just be a little more cautious in any future online endeavors, @ Rie Sonomura . It's already happened; dwelling on it'll just sharpen your anxiety that much more. Take steps to fix the problem, and worry about the crap that crops up as you're fixing/addressing it.

Smooth Criminal

 

[MewtwoMaster2002]

I have just been scammed lately. I have been having trouble finding a job for so long (being a woman majoring in Information Technology makes it even harder imo) and I guess I was so desperate for money that when these people who apparently found my uncle's resume (when he used to live with us when his relationship with his wife wasn't so good. it has since improved and he moved back to Puerto Rico but anyway) on some site emailed me with a work from home job offer, I took it hook line and sinker. Aaaaand it was a massive bank fraud, and they (as supposedly retailers) were even ripping off some customers by selling them products that weren't as advertised.

I just feel awful being taken for a sucker and having to be unemployed like this, and the resolution with eBay/PayPal/the banks is incredibly stressful too. I wish I could sue them, but they're based in Poland. They do however, have a warehouse branch in CA but idk if that can be sued...

Plus, because of this mom is now more suspicious of my online interactions...but here I'd say she kinda has good reason to be. But I'm really sad and hopeless right now and don't know what to do...

Yep. Never trust job offers from the Internet...especially ones that offer work from home. Also, it's best to research the company before you even think about replying. I've had some offers and replies that seemed fishy, and after researching them, I never replied again.