SSBM: Academy of smash (Wow! It's updated!)

[PsiFlameMaster]

heheh, exelent! Master Belch was funny and hard to beat all over agian! i think he was one of the funniest villians i've ever seen. *belch*

so now they're heading for Kirby's dimension, huh? ive never played any of his games, but i know who King Dedede is, although he seems kind of ******** (who would keep the name Dedede after they're grown up?). anyway, great chapter. keep up the good work.

o ya! i almost forgot. when are you going to update your Pokemon fic? it was really funny. keep at it with this fic, though. cya later!

 

[NESSBOUNDER]

...the Pokemon fic? (tweet tweet tweet...)
I'd prefer not to answer that question. I'll try and update this fic today.

CHRISSY EVE IS TOMORROW!! PFFT!!

 

[NESSBOUNDER]

CHAPTER 8: PART 1
The Dark Missionaries.

VWHOOOSH!! Ness’s PSI teleport blasted the heroes out into a grassy plain. Ness pushed Mr. Game and Watch off him and helped Fox back up onto his feet. Ness had to admit, he’d grown very attached to Fox, and he’d also noticed that Fox had become good friends with Jeff.
Paula looked around at the sugar-sweet countryside and turned to Ness.

Paula: nice place, have I been here before?

Ness: I don’t think so, I only ever went here alone in my travels. You’d like it, though.

Strangely enough, nobody had changed forms in the slightest. Ness guessed that in the Dream system, anything was possible.

G&W: so what do we do now?

Ness looked up at the starry night sky.

Ness: first, we sleep and regain all our PP, then we find Kirby.

Fox: I did a training course on sleeping outdoors. The trick is to burrow yourself a little ditch to sleep in, and cover yourself up with leaves.

Ness: we’ll just sleep on the grass…

Fox: huh…that’s bad for your back, but suit yourselves.

After a few hours of sleeping, Jeff woke up. He looked up to see some shooting stars flying across the night sky.

Jeff: (thinks) I’ve never seen so many shooting stars all at one time. I wonder if it’s really safe to sleep out here…

Jeff got up slowly, so that Mr. Game and Watch didn’t bump his head (he was using Jeff as a pillow) and tiptoed over to Ness, went through his bag, and found two snapped pieces of bone inside.

Jeff: the broken Chandler’s wishbone…I bet I could fix this and make something from it…

Jeff walked a bit further and sat next to Fox, who lay curled up into a furry ball on the ground. Jeff somehow felt a lot safer near Fox. The Lylatian fascinated him. Jeff was tempted to stroke him in order to find out how fox fur really felt, but remembered a time back at Earth, where his boarding school had gone on an excursion to a fox farm. He had tried to put his hands through the bars of a cage to pat one of the sleeping animals, and it had nibbled his finger.
Looking at Fox, who had a head at least twice as large as that one, he decided it best to let sleeping dogs lie.

Jeff: now let’s see…what can I do with this thing?

@#$%@#^@#%$^###

The next morning, Ness woke to the sound of chirping birds and the smell of something cooking. He got up and saw Fox holding Paula’s frying pan over a fire he’d made. There was a yellowy sort of mixture inside.

Ness: is that an omelet?

Fox: yeah, well I found some eggs in a bird’s nest that looked yummy. I can’t find any bugs to go with it, though.

Ness suddenly lost his appetite.

Poo was meditating as he always did in the mornings, floating an inch off the ground and murmuring silly nonsense. Mr. Game and Watch was standing on a rock, surveying the landscape.

G&W: it’s seven o’clock, and all is well!

Jeff: I didn’t sleep very well last night…

Ness: you never sleep at night, you’re an insomniac.

Jeff: oh yeah…

Poo: mari-wally-loopie-stummy-unjing!

Rawk berry: AUIL!!

Fox: hey, it’s that weird noise again.

Ness: does that thing follow us or something??

Paula: I still stand by the fact that it’s a figment of our imaginations. Just like that other guy.

Sound effects: who, me?

Paula: yes, you! Now please dissapear!!

Sound effects: awwww…I’m unloved.

Sound effects ran away, crying and knocked over Fox’s omelet. The runny mixture fell on the ground, creating a scorch mark. Fox angrily looked around and shook his head.

Fox: a good meal spoiled…

Poo: yick!! There’s a mutated baby chicken in there!!

Fox: …I swear those eggs were full of yolk! Well…except for that one which had blood in it, and feathers…but I picked them out!

Paula: FOX!! Unless you want me to do an impersonation of Master Belch, shut up and give me back my frying pan!!

The mutated baby chicken crawled out of the omelet and wriggled towards Paula, making revving noises. Paula screamed and ran up a tree. The chicken blew a raspberry, grew a nose and ears, and it’s wings transformed into a pair of dentures.

Chicken: bee-bee-beebiba-bibida-beee-beeee-beebibeEeE-bibbIDA-BIBBIDA-VREOOOOOMM bibideebibbibleah!!!! (takes off, leaving a trail of glitter)

Ness was about to say something when he heard a bomb explode not far away. He instantly got to his feet.

Fox: what was that?

Ness: I dunno, let’s check it out.

Paula: (from the tree) IS THAT THING GONE YET??

Jeff: yeah.

Paula ungracefully fell from the tree with a painful-sounding thud. Fox flinched and looked away.

Poo: and that is why the jetty lives upside down for the rest of his bunion!

@#_(*%@#_$^*)*^%

As Ness neared the scene of the explosion, a welcoming sight met his eyes.
There was Kirby, fighting a gang of Poppy brothers. He had a double bomb power and was firing missiles from his mouth. A girl with a paintbrush was fighting alongside him. Ness recognized her to be Adeline. Ness was just about to join in the fight when he saw two other fighters in the fray. He was amazed to see Marth and Roy slashing away at the six Poppy brothers that were left.

Kirby and Roy high-fived each other and changed positions. Marth and Adeline stood back-to back and cut a scythe through their opponents.
But the Poppy brothers continued to throw bombs, and it looked like reinforcements were coming.

Fox: hey! It’s Marth and Roy, what are they doing here?

G&W: they must have decided to help Kirby, I recall that their dimension wasn’t under threat.

Fox: but why would they go with Kirby?

Ness concentrated his mind and used a PSI Sport b. The Poppy brothers were bowled over by the psychic energy, and many of them exploded into little stars.
Kirby turned and saw Ness and his friends and began waving.
Ness waved back, and charged into the battle.
In no time at all, the Poppy brothers had been defeated, and the remaining Poppies ran from battle.
Ness walked over to Kirby.

Kirby: Ness! What are you doing here?

Ness: well, I’m here to help you fight the evil power here. As you probably know, you can’t get back to the Academy…

Kirby: yeah, stupid Master hand…But you can, can’t you? You can do that teleporty thing.

Ness: that’s right. I’m the only one who can save us all, Giygas’s followers are getting stronger.

Marth walked over and looked down at Ness with his hands on his hips.

Ness: so what are you guys doing here?

Marth: we decided to go with Kirby because our teams didn’t want us, they said they’d be fine without us. Hmph, peasants…

Roy: YEAH!! DID YOU SEE ME KICK THAT POPPY BROTHER’S @$$? HIII-YA!!

Marth: don’t be an idiot, Roy. Those creeps weren’t worthy opponents.

Roy: (mutters something in Japanese and walks off)

Ness: so Kirby, why were those Poppy brothers attacking you?

Kirby: no idea, but Adeline says she’s seen some sort of cult following among them recently…

Adeline: yeah, I’ve noticed that the Poppy brothers appear to have been performing rituals before attacking in random areas…

Ness: hmm, Giygas’s follower’s work, no doubt…so have you found the evil power yet?

Kirby: nah.

Fox: darn…

Everyone suddenly heard Roy shouting. They ran over to see what was going on. The red-haired boy was jumping up and down and pointing at a Poppy brother survivor. He wasn’t very badly injured, but obviously didn’t want to get up and walk away.

Roy: OOHH!! OOH!! LOOK! WE MISSED ONE!!

The Poppy brother rolled his eyes and shot an annoyed glare at Roy.

Kirby: hey, let’s interrogate him!!

Kirby walked over to the Poppy brother.

Kirby: why did you all attack us?

Poppy: if you think you can make me talk, then you’re a fool, Kirby!

Kirby: if you don’t talk, I’ll eat you!

Poppy: so? If you eat me, I can’t talk.

Kirby opened his mouth slowly until it was just a yawning great hole and menaced the Poppy brother with it. The little man didn’t even look scared.

Marth: this obviously isn’t going to work. Kirby, stand aside and watch as I show you the Marth way of extracting information.

Roy: OOHH!! OOOH!! I’VE SEEN HIM DO THIS BEFORE, IT’S REALLY HARD-CORE!!

Ness: perhaps I should look away…

Marth stood in front of the Poppy brother, towering over him with a blank expression on his face. He slowly drew his sword and held it out for the Poppy brother to see. The Poppy began to look just a little scared, obviously imagining what this tall human was going to do to him.
Marth drew the sword out to his side…the Poppy brother screwed his eyes tight…

And with an expert flick of his wrist, Marth discarded the sword and began gracefully peeling off his right glove.

Marth: Roy…care to have the honors?

Roy: Yes sir!! (takes Marth’s glove)

Roy was quivering with excitement. There was a period of absolute silence as Marth turned around and stared at the perplexed Poppy brother, wriggling his fingers.

Nothing happened for a few seconds. The area appeared frozen in time, nobody dared move…

And then Marth struck! The prince leaned forward and open-hand slapped the Poppy brother across the face. The Poppy brother looked dumbfoundedly back at him with a shocked expression. There was a loud “OOOoooooooo!!!” from Roy.

WHACK! Marth suddenly slapped the Poppy brother again, even harder this time. Roy did another “OOOoooooooo!!!” only louder. Ness didn’t know what to say.

Marth: let that be a lesson to you, dip-twad! (SLAP!!) Are you going to talk!? (WHACK!!) Are you then? (SLAP, SMACK) Answer me, peasant!!

The Poppy brother braved every one of Marth’s slaps. When the prince had finished, his face was red as a beet. The Poppy brother took a while to regain his composure and returned to his stubborn attitude, although he was shaking.

Poppy: I-I s-still am n-n-not talking…you cant c-crack me s-s-so easily…

Marth posed back his hand for another slap and the Poppy brother flinched and screamed.

Poppy: ALRIGHT, ALRIGHT…I’LL TALK, JUST DON’T LET THAT PRETTY BOY SLAP ME AGAIN!!!

Marth: pretty boy??? EAT THOSE WORDS, ROUGUE!!

Marth slapped the Poppy brother one last time. So hard, in fact, that he simply exploded into stars. Roy was jiggling up and down like a hyperactive schoolgirl.

Roy: WASN’T THAT JUST AWESOME???

Ness: “awesome” is not the first description that came to my mind…

Kirby: oh nice going, hot shot! You killed him!

Marth: well he insulted me. Huh, “pretty boy” indeed…that wretch deserved his fate!

Kirby: you must remember that the inhabitants of Dream land are just a tad more fragile that you are. Next time we get hold of one of those guys, I’ll do the interrogating.

Ness shot a glance at Fox, who seemed rather disturbed.

Kirby: well next up I suppose I’ll go find Waddle Dee and King Whatshisface…

Adeline: it’s Dedede…

Kirby: whatever. I can never remember his name. We may need his help.

Ness: doesn’t King Dedede hate your guts?

Kirby: I havn’t got guts.

Ness: but he hates you, doesn’t he?

Kirby: yeah, but if he doesn’t want to help us, I’ll just threaten to beat him up.

Ness: oh…

Adeline: give Dedede a chance, Kirby…He did help you defeat O2…

Kirby: yeah, he gave me a piggyback ride. ^_^

Marth: Piggyback rides? Aren’t they for rich Earls?

Kirby: piggyback rides are for everyone. Young or old, in fact, piggybacks are golden!! (Bursts into song)

_______----------------________
Piggybacks are Golden

(Dum, dum, dum)

Kirby: pig-gy-backs are for us all, they’re fun as heck unless you fall,
Marth: when you fall you’ll hurt your hair,
Roy: so the trick it just to hang in there!
Adeline: Pig-gy-backs don’t run on tracks, they’ll taaaake you on all roaaaads…
Kirby: pig-gy-backs are cool as tacks and they are made of goooold!!

Everyone: And they are made of goooold!!

Ness: you can pig-gy-back if you’re just a kid,
Jeff: you can pig-gy-back if-you’re one-hun-dred,
Poo: they’re not too fast and take a while,
Fox: and they’re guar-ant-eed to make the cubs smile.
Paula: there’s no age limit, they’re always with it, they neeeever lose their hoooold…
G&W: pig-gy backs are retro facts and they are made of goooold!!

Everyone: and theeeeey are made oooooof…goooooooooooold!!!! (yahoo, wheee!, Lala, boom, boom!! Wa-haa!! Wee, whoo!!)

__________++++++++++___________

Ness stopped smiling and turned to Fox.

Ness: it’s not the same without Young Link, isn’t it?

Fox: yeah, I miss the confetti…

----------------------===========--------\
Will the heroes be able to find the reason behind the Poppy brother’s violence spree? Find out in the next update of this fic! @@%!!

 

[MewtwoMaster2002]

Ahahahaha great updates. Hope to find updates while I'm here in LA. Can't find much time to go on computers.

 

[PsiFlameMaster]

alright! Kirby land! woohoo!

(after the song)
Ness stopped smiling and turned to Fox.

Ness: it’s not the same without Young Link, isn’t it?

Fox: yeah, I miss the confetti…

heheheh... confetti! what exactly do the Poppy Brother's look like?

o ya! the Rawk Berry and Sound Effects came back! yay!

anyways, cya later ppls!

 

[NESSBOUNDER]

The Poppy brothers are those little guys who throw bombs and wear beanies. They look like something out of Animal Crossing. (Big heads) Just got that game, it rulez!!

 

[Pokemasterkatie]

YAY! Kirby World! *hums Kirby Animé theme to herself* Yeah, the songs just aren't the same w/out Young Link... <(-l_l-)> Boyo-boyo!

Kirby: hey! Quit stealing my animé lines!

Me: Sorry Kirby...

 

[NESSBOUNDER]

I HAVE BECOME HYPNOTISED BY ANIMAL CROSSING!!! must...try to...update...must...resist...(hmm, I wonder if Pecan has replied to my letter) NO!! DON'T THINK ABOUT AN...(I hate that stupid bear, I'm going to send him some poison pen letters)

Sorry, I'll try to update later today...

 

[KingMewtwo1112]

OH YEAH KIRBY HE'S IN DA HOUSE

You got Animal Crossing? Cool. Seems you really like it. Can't wait until we see the Animal corssing part.

 

[NESSBOUNDER]

"Seems you really like it" is an understatement.

Anyway, I am currently typing out the next part. Hold onto your oranges, pple!! By the way, if any of you havn't read the Eddie Dickens trilogy by Phillip Ardagh, I strongly recommend you do. That is some funny $#!% there!! HAHAH!! (not that it has anything with the fic, mind you, I just think those books are so dam^ed cool!)

YEAH!!! K. K. Ska to the MAX!!

 

[PsiFlameMaster]

im sure you will update soon but...


TODAY IS MY BIRTHDAY!! yay! go me! woohoo!

I'm 14! yes! alright! *does a funny little victory dance* heh heh....

o ya. speaking of books, have you ever read the Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy series by Douglas Adams? it's funny and just a little bit serious, and you wont believe how many crazy connections and coincidences happen.

anyway... HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO ME, HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO ME...

 

[MewtwoMaster2002]

Happy Birthday to you. Yay New Years. When is NESSBOUNDER gonna update???

 

[NESSBOUNDER]

Terribly sorry for the delay. New years and everything. We had a big feast and then played some fun game where you had to run around and match up old songs. Here's the next update to leave you shaken...and giggling. (?)

CHAPTER &: PART @

The trek to King Dedede’s castle was long and boring. Marth had insisted they walk so that he didn’t hurt his feet which “felt as if they needed a lunch break.”
In order to keep things interesting, Ness decided to acquire some new knowledge.

Ness: why do you wear a tiara, Marth?

Marth gave him a sideways glance. The sort of sideways glance you get when you walk into a butcher’s shop and ask for a stick of celery.

Marth: it’s a crown.

Ness: oh…

Roy: WHAT? DID YOU THINK CROWNS HAD TO BE BIG AND SPIKEY??? HII-YA!!

Marth backhanded Roy across the face. Roy clutched his nose and swore in Japanese.

Marth: I seriously doubt I would allow myself to go around with one of those ungraceful golden party hats on my beautiful head. Oh no, a crown must be elegant and refined. Like a tiara!

Fox leaned over to Ness and whispered in his ear.

Fox: Kirby keeps giving me icy stares…

Marth: AHA!! You just called me a pansy, didn’t you, you rotten vermin?!

Fox: no!! How dare you say that!

Marth: I can say whatever I like, for I am a prince! And if I had my way, you’d probably be lying on the floor of my royal chamber, and I’d be wiping my feet on you whenever I came in!!!

Fox took extreme offence to this last remark.

Fox: IS THAT SO? I’D SHUT MY MOUTH IF I WERE YOU, PRIMITIVE CREEP!!

Marth: BITE YOUR TONGUE!!

Fox: NNGH!! (bares fangs)

Ness threw himself between Marth and Fox.

Ness: calm it, you two!! Alright…let’s hear both your sides of the story…

Fox: he insulted me with racial comments that are considered highly offensive by my kind!

Marth: he insulted me with comments about my…feminine side!!

Fox: I DID NOT!! I SAID THAT KIRBY WAS GIVING ME ICY STARES!!

Marth blushed and turned away, waited for a few seconds and turned around.

Marth: please accept my humble apologies, sir McCloud.

Fox wasn’t so ready to make amends.

Fox: huh…wipe your feet on me indeed…if you came from the Lylat system, every fox within hearing distance would have bitten you stupid!

Marth: YOU DARE NOT ACCEPT THE APOLOGIES OF A PRINCE!!!??!?

It seemed like Marth was going to hurt someone, but Roy thrust a bowl of onions under his nose.

Roy: fruit?

Marth: those are onions Roy…vegetables.

Roy: … (puts them away)

Ness desperately tried to maintain the peace again.

Ness: no, honestly Marth…there was really no call for that behavior now, was there?

Marth wiped his royal nose on his royal sleeve.

Marth: I’ve been called a sissy and I deny it all!

Ness: of course. You’re not a sissy! ^_^ ‘

Marth looked like he’d calmed down.

Marth: oh well…someday I’ll be a king. All I have to do is wait for daddy to kick the bucket and then I can marry a lovely damsel, rule my world with an iron fist, and nobody will EVER call me a sissy again!!

Roy: hear hear!

Marth: and then I can do whatever I want, including wear eye shadow and lipstick without getting any funny looks!

Ness felt confused and disgusted. He turned to look at Kirby, who was actually shooting Fox an icy glare! Fox wasn’t paying attention, but Kirby persisted, staring like a fish.

Paula: is it me, or is Kirby staring at Fox?

Ness: he’s staring alright…it’s more of a glare than a stare…I wonder why he’s doing it?

Adeline, who was leading the party, stopped. This caused a sort of dominoes effect as Marth, Roy, Fox and Jeff all fell over each other.

Rawk berry: OI!!yyyyYYYYIUPF!!

Paula: that’s a new one…

Adeline pointed to the big castle that loomed in front of them.

Adeline: that’s King Dedede’s castle. If I’m not mistaken, he had a special doorbell installed so that people wouldn’t have to keep climbing to the top in order to see him.

Kirby: that’s nice of him…

Adeline: I know…he’s been acting very nicely lately.

Adeline walked across the drawbridge and rung the doorbell. There was a brief “splash” as something landed in the moat. A few seconds later, a very annoyed, very fat and very wet looking penguin emerged from the scummy water and began doing the angry dance right in front of them.

Dedede: I DO NOT REMEMBER ORDERING AN EJECTOR-BED WITH THAT CONFOUNDED DOORBELL!!

Adeline: you got ejected?

Dedede: yes indeed. Like a piece of over-burned toast from a five-hundred-year-old toaster. May I help you?

Kirby: you may indeed! We have a question about the Poppy brothers.

King Dedede shot Kirby an icy stare.

Dedede: if this has anything to do with the Poppys and their freakish new rituals, then I have nothing to do with it and I take no responsibility for their actions. After all, those particular Poppy brothers are not my subjects.

Kirby nodded and turned to leave.

Dedede: hey! What’s the meaning of this breach of privacy anyway? I bet these are your friends from that stupid Smash thingy tourney huh? I don’t know why I wasn’t invited to that thing.

Kirby: me neither. You’d look a bit weird, but I mean…they let Mr. Game and Watch in.

G&W: hey!

@#$%@#^^$^%$%

The trip to King Dedede’s castle had been a waste of time. Kirby decided that the best way to get things done was to storm in there and “blow down this Popsicle stand.” So the next group of Poppy brothers they would just wade into.

Kirby: see? Brute force is always a good answer!

Adeline: I don’t know, Kirby…something tells me that this is going to take a bit more strategy.

Kirby: strategy shchmatergy…Let’s go into the forest and talk to Whispy Woods about this. He gets all the latest goss…and we can also find Waddle Dee…

Half an hour later, Ness and friends were in a dark forest. Everything seemed normal, except for a strange presence Ness could sense nearby.

Ness: this is kinda strange…but I can sense Specll and Edward Hemorrhoid’s energy flow nearby.

Kirby: who and who?

Ness: enemies of ours…I think we should investigate…now I’m certain of it! It’s coming stronger now…from the east…and Specll’s energy flow is…fluctuating…?

Fox: what does that mean?

Ness: it means he’s struggling with something, or in considerable pain or under stress. Perhaps he’s wounded? That would give us time to catch up with them!

Fox: and it also means that he wouldn’t be able to fight back! Let’s go!

Ness: wait! Edward Hemorrhoid appears to be in perfect condition…wow…Specll’s energy flow is going crazy! I say we keep a low profile, find out what’s going on, and THEN do something about it. And remember, the last time we underestimated Specll, we ended up in a black sphere.

Everyone agreed with Ness’s plan. Silently, they followed the boy as he traced the pulsating energy flow. Soon, voices could be plainly heard. Ness crouched down and peered through some bushes at the scene in front of him.

@#$%#$^$^$%^$

Specll screwed his eyes tight and gritted his fangs. Every fiber in his body was straining to try and resist the horrible sensation in his head. His pink fur was beaded with sweat as he gasped in pain, fighting and resisting.
Pokey and Edward stood by, watching. Pokey had a grin on his face and was clutching his hands excitedly together, while Edward seemed worried.
The tumor turned to Pokey.

Edward: He…hE’S reAllY hUrtIng! MaybE…

Pokey: oh Eddie…so what? Just be thankful it’s not you.

Pokey smirked and turned to Specll, who was still crying and sobbing on the forest floor.

Pokey: come on Specll!! Just a little bit longer, you can do it…

Edward: ThInK oF nIcE thInGs!!

Specll jerked his head back and began screaming, tears pouring from his eyes.

Specll: ENOUGH!! STOP IT!! STOP!! NO MORE!!

He jerked his body away and lay sobbing on the wet grass, his tormentor standing over him, a gleaming fluid dripping from its black fangs.
The shadow-like monster stepped back from the trembling bundle of fur and flexed its black claws, its glowing red eyes full of hunger and malicious desire. It was shaped like a headless human with a pitch black body that seemed to flicker and pulsate with dark energy. Where its head should have been, it had but two gleaming red eyes and a set of disjointed fangs floating in the air. Its arms and legs sported sharp, long talons.
Pokey, still smiling, addressed the creature.

Pokey: had enough yet?

The demon turned and spoke in a voice that sounded as though it was disconnected from the beast itself. It sounded like two voices rather than one, and seemed to whistle like the wind through a cave.

???: yes…I have finished feeding. The chosen one has supplied me with the strength I need to continue my work, although it will not be long before I will require a second helping…

Pokey: uh? How often will you need to feed? Once a day? What?

???: my feast will commence whenever I so desire. I cannot survive in this bright land without consuming pain and suffering. And the inhabitants of this world are too frail for me to gain sufficient nutrition from.

Pokey looked worried. He shuffled and thought before agreeing.
The shadow hissed and dissolved into the air like a cloud of black smoke.

Ness watched from behind his bush, not believing what he had just witnessed. Nobody dared move.

Fox: (whispering) that…was horrible!

Ness: shhh!

Pokey walked over to Specll, who was straining to lift himself onto his knees.

Pokey: stop whimpering, the master told you that something like this would happen…

Specll rose unsteadily and spoke in a strangled sob.

Specll: he…he didn’t warn me…about THIS…(gasp)…I…I didn’t know it would hurt so much!!

Pokey unsympathetically shook his head, not even attempting to help his teammate to his feet.

Pokey: hmph…well what did you expect? What worries me, is that it says it will soon be hungry again.

Specll’s eyes widened with fear. Pokey ignored him and continued.

Pokey: the master said that this particular dark missionary wasn’t doing too well in this dimension…it can’t extract enough pain from its victims in order to grow in strength…I wonder how many times it has to feed?

Specll: no! Please don’t let it torture me again!!

Pokey: well you’re stronger than me, and Eddie’s not good enough. So I’m afraid you’re just going to have to get used to it. Remember, just a tiny sacrifice and you’ll be rewarded one hundred times over!

Specll shot Pokey a look of pain and anger. He rose to his feet, still shaking.

Specll: yeah? I’ve sacrificed enough already! I’ve lost the friendship of the only person I ever cared about, allowed my self to be half-killed by parallel-reality warriors and now I have to allow that..that thing…to torture me! Where’s my reward?? What am I getting for all this?!

Pokey: you know what’s been promised, Specll. Are you going to chicken out now? Are you going to crawl away with your tail between your legs?
Listen fox, if you continue your role as a Giygas’s chosen one, it’s guaranteed that your life will be spared when the war is over. Not only that, but you’ll be a star, you’ll be of incredible rank! You will be worshipped like a god! And if you give up now and re-join those foolish guys who oppose Giygas’s followers, it is much more likely that your soul will be shattered like a pane of glass, along with those so-called “allies of justice.” You know, and I know that nothing can defeat Giygas’s followers. All three dark missionaries are in place, and we are unstoppable! To follow your destiny is to save your life. Got it?

Specll closed his eyes, his chest heaving in and out as he tried to breathe away his pain. He slowly opened them again and nodded in reply.

Specll: you’re right. I’m no fool. I’m determined to stay alive, and not only that…I’m determined to achieve that rank…that worship…

But despite what Specll had just said, he still looked guilty. Pokey noticed this and spoke again.

Pokey: guilt again, huh? What have I told you before? You’re doing the right thing! Why should you be guilty?

Specll: I…it’s just that I feel so disgusted with myself…I may be doing the right thing, but it’s evil! You can’t hide that from me. This whole thing is completely evil to the core…and how can evil be good?

Pokey rolled his eyes and sighed.

Pokey: for the last time, Specll, that “good and bad” thing is all in your head!! There is no such thing as “good or bad!” The only thing that should matter is you! If you can get something that improves your life, then you should get it! If you have to steal something in order to get rich, then steal it! If those so called “good guys” had any sense, they’d steal do the same!!

Specll frowned and held his head in his hand.

Specll: yeah…I…I mean…that makes sense…but it just feels so…wrong…

Pokey: SO?? YOU HAVE TO MAKE THAT “WRONG” FEELING GO AWAY!! YOU ARE THE MOST IMPORTANT PERSON IN THE WORLD, I AM THE MOST IMPORTANT PERSON IN THE WORLD!! OTHER PEOPLE SHOULDN’T MATTER…unless of course, you’re both in it together. Like you and me! We should be the only ones who matter to one another, because we need each other to get what we want!

Ness had heard enough. He couldn’t stand to even think about Pokey’s deceptive lies for another second. He jumped from his bush into the clearing where Pokey, Specll and Edward stood.

Ness: YOU SCUM, POKEY!! YOU…YOU BLACK-HEARTED, COWARDLY SNAKE!!!

Pokey didn’t even have time to say “ ! ” Ness charged at him and PK shoved him straight into a thick tree. Specll and Edward exchanged gasps of surprise before rushing to Pokey’s aid.

Fox: oh tish!! NESS, YOU FOOL! (Jumps out from hiding)

Pretty soon, a full-scale battle was raging in the forest clearing. Ness held Pokey down and repeatedly punched his face, cursing and shouting the whole time. Specll downed Adeline with a slash from his claws and delivered a crushing kick to the side of Ness’s head. The boy gasped and fell unconscious.

Specll turned around and Fox belted him across the face with the butt of his gun. The rejector shield sent a bolt of electricity surging through his body. Fox screamed and fell to his knees.

Specll: Fox…I’m amazed that you managed to get out of that black prison…but you know, you really should have gone back to the Lylat system where you wouldn’t get in our way…

Fox: shut it! Do you expect me to just sit at home while you destroy the Nintendo universe? I’M JUST AS DESPERATE TO SURVIVE AS YOU ARE, SPECLL, AND I’M NOT GOING TO JOIN THE ENEMY LIKE YOU HAVE!!

Specll: …you know, deep down inside me, Fox, I still care about you. You can’t defeat an invincible enemy…and as the old saying goes, “if you can’t beat ‘em…join ‘em.” So that’s what I did. Fox…switch sides, perhaps Giyags’s followers will spare you.

Fox struggled, but Specll pinned him down.

Fox: it’s that kind of treacherous attitude that got my father killed by Andross!

Specll: why did your daddy bother fighting Andross in the first place? Why didn’t he join up with him, instead? I’m sure Andross would have given him a LOT more money than General Pepper was offering.

Fox bared his fangs and strained to throw Specll off. Specll activated his rejector shock, tazing Fox back into submission.

Fox: BECAUSE MY FATHER COULD SEE HOW EVIL ANDROSS WAS, THAT’S WHY!!

Specll: oh! Really! Of course!! James McCloud wouldn’t have anything to do with evil. Oh no, what was I thinking!? He was such a GOOD person…AND IF YOU OFFERED HIM ENOUGH CASH, HE WOULD HAVE SLIT HIS OWN MOTHER’S THROAT!!!

Fox: TAKE THAT BACK!! I’LL…I’LL…

Specll: just take a look at yourself and your job, Fox. You fight and kill for money. You are a mercenary. A HIRED KILLER!! What a saintly profession…

Fox stopped struggling and let Specll’s harsh words sink in. He looked up at the pink fox who he’d spent his childhood with. Remembering the wonderful times they’d had together, and how Specll had always been so shy and grim. Violence had made him cringe, he used to sit by himself in his room for hours on end, just staring at the ants as they crawled up the wall.
And Fox remembered himself…how his childhood days were filled with lust for the excitement of the battles he would be fighting when he grew older.
Fox closed his eyes and relaxed his body.

Fox: Specll…you’re right. I may have a sinful profession, but that doesn’t stop me from having morals. I don’t care what you do to me now, but I’ll never stop fighting for good. And I warn you, if you kill me now, my memory will haunt you for the rest of your cursed existence.

Specll fixed his half brother with a puzzled look. He hesitated.

Fox: well?

Specll: I’m not going to try to change your views, Fox. You’re not perfect, and neither am I. My goal is not to kill you, and I hope it never comes to that. But now we’re enemies, so unfortunately I’ll just have to treat you as one.
Limelight of love!

Fox’s body went limp and his eyes closed in an expression of pure bliss. Specll sadly turned around, only to see a thick blue streak smudge across his field of vision, and then feel a sharp pain in his left knee. Specll collapsed as a ribbon-like chord wrapped around his leg and jerked him onto his back. Dazed, he looked up to see Adeline wielding her paintbrush, a quickly-drawn line of paint hanging from the end like a whip.

Adeline: haah!!

Specll felt the paintbrush sweep over his face and suddenly his eyes began stinging and watering. The rejector shield didn’t deflect paint, especially chili-flavored paint.

Specll: GAWD, THAT CANES!!

Edward Hemorrhoid was single-handedly beating Marth and Roy. The two swordsmen had been cursed by the tumor and were now making odd gyrating movements.
Paula, Poo, Jeff had all been gassed by Pokey. It was just Mr. Game and Watch, Kirby and Adeline.

G&W: I’ve always been a hit-and-run expert. And I say that we run!!

Adeline: fine! Hold them back while I set up my easel.

G&W: HOLD THEM BACK?? WHAT, ARE YOU CRAZY??

Kirby: aw, come on. We can do that.

G&W: easy for you to say, but I’ve got my LIFE TO WORRY ABOUT!!

Adeline set up an easel and began furiously painting. Mr. Game and Watch took out his chair and held it out in front of him, panicking slightly. Kirby drew his ninja sword and held it in a ready stance. Pokey and Edward Hemorrhoid advanced slowly towards them. Specll was too busy screaming and trying to wipe the chili paint out of his eyes.

Pokey: don’t even try to escape! We’ve got the perfect use for you guys…heheheh

Edward: FeeEL thE wrAtH oF tUmOr PowEr!!

Specll: SOMEBODY HELP ME!! (runs into a tree)

Edward: OoOH…WaiTY thEre, PokEY. I’vE GoTTa hElP Spech. (floats off to help Specll)

Pokey: HAY!! DON’T LEAVE MY HERE TO TAKE ON THESE TWO BY MYSELF…

Kirby and Mr. Game and Watch practically jumped on Pokey and beat the tar out of him. He ran off crying before they could do any further damage.

Adeline: It’s ready!!

Adeline held up what looked to be a sort of vacuum cleaner. Holding the nozzle, she sucked up all the fainted fighters and called a retreat. Kirby, Mr. Game and Watch and Adeline sprinted off into the woods before the villains could catch them.

Half an hour later, Adeline opened the vacuum and let everyone out. Ness shook his head and blinked.

Ness: what happened?

Kirby: you got your tar pit kicked.

Paula: really…the last thing I can remember was Pokey giving me a Dutch oven…

Ness looked around.

Ness: where’s Fox?

Adeline: !*.*!

G&W: @_@

Kirby: <(0_0)>

Ness: NO!! YOU FORGOT HIM, DIDN’T YOU!!?? AAAAAAAAAARGH!!

Jeff: don’t worry…I’m sure we’ll be able to rescue him…won’t we?

Marth stood tall and proud as a ray of sun shining on his blue hair. He squinted his eyes, while still trying to stare on in an epic fashion.

Marth: whatever happens…we can sure as heck try.

G&W: why are you suddenly caring about Fox?

Marth: I’m not. I’m practicing for when I have to rescue a damsel.

 

[MewtwoMaster2002]

Hahaha great update. I bet they were confused when they heard about the "heroes from a parallel universe".

 

[Vaerix]

Marth: whatever happens…we can sure as heck try.

G&W: why are you suddenly caring about Fox?

Marth: I’m not. I’m practicing for when I have to rescue a damsel.

Funny stuff.

 

[NESSBOUNDER]

Who thinks Adeline should be in the next smash bros game? (raises hand)

Nah. I might start on a new update today. I've been thinking about the Animal Crossing bit and I already have the plot exactly right, and have already devised some jokes and funny bits that'll go into it.

 

[PsiFlameMaster]

heh heh, that was a great chapter. I havn't replied for the last few days bcuz i was replaying EarthBound. it brings back a lot of memories, and I'm even finding new stuff that i didnt know was there the last time i played it. I've already just got to Summers, so I'm pretty far, or at least i've come far for just 2 or 3 days of game play. It still amazes me how powerful a lot of the Psi techniques are, especialy now that my party is begining to learn Gamma levels of their Psi attacks (that's the C level NESSBOUNDER has been using in place of the Greek alphabet symbols).

anyways, i just want to remind you about your quirky pokemon fic, and to try not to abandon it.

alright, i guess i'll see you guys later. bye!

 

[NESSBOUNDER]

"Sigh"...I'll be updating the quirky pokemon fic in a week's time, because I'll be going on a trip to see my other grandparents. Because I don't have the hard copy of this fic there, I'll be updating The Disturbingly Quirky Pokemon tale and Kirby's Delerium.
Perhaps I'll even update it today...instead of this fic.

 

[NESSBOUNDER]

Recent lack of updates are due to me updating in the OFFICIAL KIRBY Khronicles fic. Go there to see some funny stuff about Academy of Smash.

 

[NESSBOUNDER]

CHAPTER 7: PART 3
And now for one of my nastiest updates ever!
(for shock value) If you’re easily disturbed, skip this one.

At Pokemon World, Spiteshade’s army was resting. They’d flattened the flimsy rebel resistance and were now preparing for a final assault. This time, to finish off the survivors.
Spiteshade chortled to herself as she played with a shadow ball she’d formed in her claws.

Spiteshade: soon, Relinquiss…soon the resistance shall be no more, and Deoxis will reward us for our “troubles” hehheehehh…

Relinquiss silently nodded and put his hands behind his cape.

Relinquiss: yes indeed. Not so much trouble than a mere annoyance. It alarms me how Pokemon like that even try to pass themselves off as fighters…

Spiteshade took aim at a passing Banett and hurled the shadow ball. The deadly projectile found its mark and the unlucky soldier screamed and fell to the ground in a crumpled heap. Spiteshade laughed silently to herself and turned back to Relinquiss who remained expressionless.

Spiteshade: it would be a pity not to show our enemies some of our true ghost Pokemon ways before we defeat them, wouldn’t it?

Relinquiss’s eye lit up with cruel understanding of his mistress’s intentions.

Spiteshade: next raid we make, I’m going to take some prisoners…and afterwards…

Relinquiss: a fine idea, ma’am…make them scream…

SnaP!! A noise alerted Spiteshade out of her cruel daydreams. She turned to see nothing out of the ordinary.

Spiteshade: okay, which one of you made that noise? Come on, fess up, I’m not going to…

CrAcK! Another noise. This time, it came from outside of the camp.

Spiteshade: disappear!! It’s most likely a spy!

The whole army slowly faded into invisibility. Spiteshade and Relinquiss, along with the two other generals, crouched under one of the ferns and peered into the forest.
Sure enough, a Girafarig and a Manectric were walking near their camping grounds, followed by a small posse of others. Spiteshade grinned. She’d have fun with these visitors.

Rod: (quietly) stay by me, you lot…pretty soon we’ll come across their camp. I think I can smell it around here…and when we do, I’m going to make a run for it back to Breela and tell her to bring in the army. You lot just try to identify as many of those ghosts as possible, and try to get Spiteshade if you can!

The Girafarig’s name was Tippe. Tippe’s dedication to the resistance wasn’t as stable as Breela hoped it would be…in fact, Tippe was solid traitor/deserter material. But so far, he’d shown to be a fine, if not slightly cowardly fighter.

Tippe: And just what are we going to do to preserve our safety? I didn’t volunteer for this little trip you know! I expect you expect us to hold off this whole army of Ghost Pokemon by ourselves?

Rod: I run fast, Tippe. Breela and the army will be here before you know it.

There was a strangled cry from the back of the posse. Rod turned around to see a rustling of a bush behind him, and one of his soldiers gone, the lost Pokemon’s screams echoing through the woods.

Rod: Quick! Start your foresights and odor sleuths! I’ll run off and get Breela, and remember, be brave…

Rod shot off through the trees like an arrow. Within a matter of minutes, he was back at the base, panting his message to Breela.

Breela: TO ARMS!!

Army: YAH!!!!

Pikachu turned to Pichu, who was to stay back and prepare healing herbs.

Pikachu: I’m going off to fight now. I don’t want you to do anything dangerous while I’m gone, got it?

Pichu: aww…

@#$%@#^#$@%^

Tippe gasped as the curse took effect, sapping away his life like water through a straw. Slowly he raised his head to see Spiteshade’s angry face glaring down at him. Again, his body jerked as another fourth of his life was forced out of him.

Spiteshade: you and your little troupe of weaklings identified us, didn’t you? You made us vulnerable to your crude normal attacks, didn’t you!?
Well done, Girafarig, but you and your squad will never live to see the outcome. Now try to enjoy the last moments of your life.

Tippe coughed weakly and closed his eyes as the last fourth of his life was drained.

Tippe: no…I don’t want to…

Spiteshade created a bug-type hidden power ball in her left paw and slowly pushed it into Tippe’s prone neck. The Girafarig cried out and his body went limp. Tippe was dead. Relinquiss approached carefully, knowing that Spiteshade was grumpy.

Relinquiss: well…I suppose we’ve been identified…

Spiteshade twisted around to face him. She looked cross.

Spiteshade: SO!? WE CAN STILL DEFEAT THOSE REBELS AND THEIR NORMAL TYPES! A GHOST POKEMON IS NOT LIMITED TO GHOST TYPE ATTACKS!

Relinquiss: it’s just that…after that curse you forced Ectoplas to perform on the Girafarig…he’s not in any form to battle…and the soldiers are starting to question their safety.

Spiteshade: who cares about that fool? The look on the Girafarig’s face was well worth the sacrifice of a stupid commander…

Relinquiss: well…I don’t know how to put this, but there has been talk among the soldiers…they’re starting to talk about deserting.

Spiteshade: deserting? NOBODY DESERTS MY ARMY!

Relinquiss: it’s just that you keep killing and crippling your own soldiers without any reason, and they’re beginning to fear you just a little bit too much…

Spiteshade’s gray face turned a dark black. She grabbed Relinquiss by his hand and sunk her claws deep into his tender palm. Relinquiss cringed in pain as Spiteshade continued to squeeze.

Spiteshade: tell them all that if they desert me, I will report their treason to Deoxis, and Deoxis will have them hunted down and slaughtered like insects!

Spiteshade let go of Relinquiss’s hand. The Dusclops rubbed the tears from his eye, nodded and floated off to spread his grim news.
Spiteshade angrily poked her now-physical body and growled in frustration.

Her sixth sense told her that Breela’s army was coming to avenge the brave identifying squad. And she had the perfect reception in store for them.

#@$%^#$^#$%^

Pikachu and Blaze led their army through the trees. The Resistance’s strategy was going to be a pincer-movement. Blaze and Pikachu would come from one side while Breela and Flynn would come from the other, hopefully trapping their enemies.

Pikachu: I hate these battles…mainly because nobody wins them.

Blaze what do you mean?

Pikachu: even if we defeat Spiteshade’s army, many of us will be slain as well, which in my eyes is a loss, and if we lose to Spiteshade’s army, then that’s a loss too!

Blaze: well one of those losses is better than the other, so I say we’re aiming to defeat Spiteshade’s army.

Pikachu: pfft. I was just saying…

A very clear, very distant scream echoed throughout the woods. Blaze stood rigid as he listened intently to the sorrowful sound.

Blaze: …that voice…I…that’s Tippe! I knew the identifying squad would fight to the end! Come on, we have to help him!

Pikachu: Blaze, don’t do anything rash…

But Blaze had already signaled to his soldiers and was charging towards the source of the haunting screams. Pikachu hesitated…then followed. Blaze would end up getting to Spiteshade’s army before the other side of the pincer would, and that wasn’t in the plan.

Blaze, followed Tippe’s screams until they were loud in his ears. He burst through a hedge and into the forest clearing.

Blaze: I’M COMING TIPPE…JUST hang on…huh?

Thirty shadow balls immediately flew towards Blaze the moment he entered the clearing. If it weren’t for his quick reflexes, he would have been toast. Blaze threw himself to the ground and the shadow balls exploded against the trees behind him, cracking the trunk like a matchstick. Blaze looked up to see a troop of at least eighty ghosts, led by Relinquiss. The Dusclops clapped his hands together evilly and smiled with his eye.

Relinquiss: looking for a friend of yours? Well I wouldn’t want to disappoint you.

Blaze looked in horror as Relinquiss held Tippe’s corpse out in front of him. Relinquiss produced a long needle and drove it deep into the body, causing a disembodied scream to echo throughout the trees.

Relinquiss: it won’t be much use to try and save your dead friend, Blaziken. But we’ve found a nice use for him, or at least his soul…to lure you to your doom!!

Pikachu arrived into the scene and froze with disbelief at what he saw. Relinquiss held Tippe’s body up and produced another needle.

Relinquiss: simply for the fun of it, I’m going to let you hear his last words just before we cursed him. Are you ready, rebel?

Relinquiss jammed the needle and Tippe’s panic-stricken whimpering could clearly be heard. But the blank staring eyes and mouth of the dead Girafarig didn’t move.

Tippe: no! Please, just let me go! I…I’ll tell you where our base is, (sob) I’ll do anything! Don’t kill me! JUST DON’T KILL ME!!!

Relinquiss removed the needle, dropped Tippe’s body and let it fade. He placed his hands together and seemed to glow with evil delight.

Relinquiss: I think we’ll stop now, I’ve had enough of playing with your talkative friend’s mortal remains. However, you shouldn’t mourn for him, because you’re going to see him again very soon!

Something in Blaze’s mind just snapped. The Fire type jumped to his feet as flames roared around his body.

Blaze: MAY YOU BURN IN H*!!, DUSCLOPS!! HEEAAAAAAAAHrAH!!!

Blaze planted his talon into the ground and a burning flamethrower snaked across the forest floor directly at Relinquiss. The Dusclops grabbed the nearest ghost soldier and used him to block the shot. Relinquiss dropped the burning Pokemon and formed a black light between his hands. Both armies swung into action and the heat of battle raged. Pikachu let his electricity flow constantly like a stream of burning water. The action raged around him as the Normal type Pokemon were able to effectively battle this time, making the odds a lot more even. When a Ghost type tried to use a shadow ball or nightshade on one of their fighters, a Normal type would jump in and block the shot just like they had practiced.

But the battle between Relinquiss and Blaze seemed to be happening all on its own. The two generals were locked in a fierce dance of death. Relinquiss, using his extreme defense and is nightshade attack in order to try and wear Blaze down, and Blaze using his scorched-earth tactics and deadly physical power to give the evil ghost everything he had.
They were both nimbly dodging each other’s attacks.

Pikachu watched them in awe. Suddenly, he felt the tingling of dark energy behind him. Quick as a flash, he turned around and grabbed the Sableye behind him and pitched him forwards, blasting him with thunder, his nightshade attack fizzing harmlessly onto the grass.

Pikachu turned around quickly and bumped into another body, however, he knew it wasn’t an enemy because it was too sturdy to be a ghost. And plus, it was hard to mistake that vegetable-like scent.

Breela: what happened?? Why did you attack so early? Do you realize just what could happened if we hadn’t have suspected something was wrong?

Pikachu: I’m sorry Breela…(shocks a Banett) But they lured us in with a trap. Blaze fell for it, I’m afraid.

Breela swung around and spored a Dusclops right in the face before focus-punching him and finishing off with a brick break.

Breela: I’ll overlook this, just concentrate on fighting!

Pikachu turned to his side and encountered a Shedinja. He panicked and backed away as the mysterious shell floated towards him. Luckily, a Wigglytuff who just happened to know faint attack, (and yes, they can learn it through egg) saved him.

Pikachu jumped back and was struck to the ground by a powerful shadow ball. He shrugged off the crackling energy and turned to see Spiteshade towering above him, her zipper-mouth gleaming as she blocked the sun from his view.

Spiteshade: well, well, well…what’s a measly Pikachu doing in a full-scale battle like this? Don’t tell me…you’re obviously one of those gifted Pokemon who are born every now and again that are abnormally powerful and can’t evolve, right? Oh well, sugah…you’re dead now…

Breela shot forward and smashed Spiteshade in the side of her head. The Bannet fell to the ground, dazed from the blow.

Breela: hey Spiteshade…remember me? Misca of Schinn?

Spiteshade: vaguely…I remember massacring a tribe of Brelooms called the Schinn…how’d you escape?

Breela: a trainer caught me before you and your vile army destroyed my tribe! I have donned the name Breela as to disguise my real identity. I am the princess Misca of Schinn and you are meat!

Spiteshade formed a fiery blaze between her claws and pitched it at her foe. The will-o-wisp engulfed Breela and burned her severely. Breela cried out, but the leftovers she was carrying softened the impact of the burn just slightly.

Pikachu rushed at Spiteshade, but the Banett formed a shadow ball and thrust it into him, knocking him to the ground once more. Pikachu winced and tried to drag himself back to his feet. Breela and Spiteshade were going at it hammer and tongs. Pikachu felt a shadow fall over him. He looked up to see Flynn standing over him.

Flynn: sir Pikachu…do not lie on the floor in that manner, you are only going to be slain! Here, climb up onto my wings and I shall protect you from harm.

Pikachu weakly climbed up onto the brave Flygon’s back. Flynn bared his claws and began scything his way through the ghosts. Pikachu let out shocks of electricity every now and again, knowing that it wouldn’t hurt Flynn, as he was a Ground type.

Blaze and Relinquiss were still locked in a fierce battle. Blaze had been grabbed by the ghost and was now being subject to a deadly nightshade assault.

Blaze: AAAAhhh…rrrrRRR…BLAZE KICK!!

Blaze shin-gouged Relinquiss, causing him to flinch and release his grip. Blaze rushed in and pounded Relinquiss with fire punch.
Relinquiss recovered and fired off another night shade, which Blaze dodged. He executed another flamethrower burning snake and it caught Relinquiss of guard this time.
Swathed in flames, Relinquiss made a last-ditch effort to take Blaze by surprise. Out of the flames, he fired a night shade which found its mark and put Blaze into the red section of his health.

Blaze: NOW YOU’RE FINISHED! REVERSAL!!!

Blaze grabbed Relinquiss and swung him around by the arm. On the final swing, Blaze turned around and planted his knee into Relinquiss’s flight path. Ther-whack! The Dusclops fell to the ground in a crumpled heap.
Blaze was about to torch his almost defeated enemy, when he noticed a dark puddle that seemed to be forming around his feet. Quickly, he cancelled his last attack and stood back where the destiny bond couldn’t reach him.

Blaze: you can’t just destiny bond my for ever! Soon you’ll run out of PP and then I’ll be all over you!

Relinquiss just stared with his eye. Blaze suddenly felt as though he was rooted to the spot and unable to turn away from the ghost’s hypnotic gaze.

Relinquiss: my mean look prevents you from escaping, Blaziken…I can bide my time, but you will have to attack sooner or later, and then my destiny bond will make us both faint.
Chances are that one of my soldiers will destroy you.

Blaze stared with hatred at the Dusclops who was now rising to his feet. He couldn’t allow himself to be defeated by a cheap tactic like this. He tried to call to one of his soldiers, but couldn’t. The mean look prevented him from turning his attention elsewhere. Blaze gritted his beak and realized that he only had one choice left…

Blaze: Blaze Kick!!!!

The moment Blaze’s foot made contact with Relinquiss’s face, Blaze blacked out. He’d just have to hope for the best, and perhaps luck would be with him.

@#$%@#$%@#$%

Spiteshade backed away from her advancing foe. Breela’s extreme physical strength had made it completely foolish to even think about fighting. Now that Spiteshade had been identified, her chances of beating Breela were just about gone.

Breela: so, Spiteshade…I bet you’re starting to regret what you did to my family…

Spiteshade: I’d do it again if I could! Now…back away from me or…or we’ll both go down!!

Breela looked down to see a destiny bond forming at her feet. She looked up at Spiteshade with hatred in her eyes. Spiteshade grinned.

Breela: ROD! Get her!!

Spiteshade had planned this all. Forming a shadow ball in one hand, she pitched it towards Breela, knocking her down and in critical health, and then spun around and slammed a point-blank half-formed shadow ball right into Rod’s skull. Rod collapsed to the ground, fainted.

Pikachu had seen all of this happen. Everything seemed to just go into slow motion for him. He jumped off Flynn’s back and sprinted towards Spiteshade, who forming a hidden power ring around her so she would strike both Rod and Breela.

Pikachu: THUNDEEEERRRRRRR!!!!

Spiteshade’s eyes widened as she turned to see Pikachu sailing through the air towards her, electricity blaring from his body as the light ball he was holding took effect.
KA-POW!! Spiteshade was fainted before she could even release the hidden power.
With a final surge of energy, Pikachu hit Spiteshade a final time, and with a fantastic flash of light, her ghostly body crumbled into dust.

The fighting all around him suddenly stopped. Nobody moved. Finally, a cry went up from one of the ghosts.

“Spiteshade is fallen! Let us retreat! RETREAT!!”

The ghost army, freed from the fear of their leader, began to retreat…until a dark and sinister voice echoed through the trees that froze their ghostly hearts with dread.

Relinquiss: NOBODY WILL BE RETREATING!! NOT UNLESS YOU WISH TO PAY THE PUNISHMENT…WE WILL FIGHT ON, TO THE DEATH!!

Relinquiss held up the fainted body of Blaze by the throat. His eye glowing with a new source of power.

Relinquiss: Spiteshade may be dead, but now I am in command of this whole army!! AND I WILL HAVE REVENGE FOR MY MISTRESS!!!

Pikachu realized that there was no hope for Blaze. One simple squeeze of Relinquiss’s powerful hand and he would be finished…but Relinquiss didn’t squeeze, or fry or anything…instead, his body began to expand.
The Dusclops’s body began to expand until it was just a gaping black hole with a tiny eye on top. Relinquiss laughed horribly. Pikachu noticed that Blaze’s body was starting to become blurry. Relinquiss was using his soul consume attack! An attack that was banned from Pokemon battles, soul consume was a deadly weapon of death.

Pikachu: BLAAAAAZEEE!!!!

Pikachu forced an incredible ball of raw lighting out of his body and sent it streaming into Relinquiss’s body. Relinquiss flinched and dropped Blaze, but he didn’t sustain any damage.

Relinquiss: fine try…but you won’t save your friend…

Relinquiss grabbed a squirming Sableye and consumed it like it was made of water. He floated towards Pikachu, simply consuming anyone who got in his way, including his own soldiers, and with each Pokemon he consumed, he grew bigger, and bigger.

Pikachu had never seen the soul consume work in this way before. He’d only ever known it to work on Pokemon who were stupid enough to touch a Dusclops for more that five seconds…but Relinquiss was somehow managing to use this move as a fully offensive attack.
Now the Dusclops’s swollen body was almost touching Pikachu’s. He was backed up against a tree and had nowhere to run. Relinquiss laughed again.

Relinquiss: so little Pikachu…are you ready to spend the rest of your life in eternal torment? Then just take one step forward…and it’s not like you have a choice, either!

Pikachu closed his eyes. Doom was inevitable.

KA-CHAWW!!! Pikachu opened his eyes to see tiny strips of Dusclops floating to the ground like falling leaves. He blinked just to make sure he wasn’t dreaming, and saw, to his amazement, every Pokemon in the enemy army, Banetts, Dusclops, Sableye and Shedinja, all with their arms in the trademark shadow-ball throwing pose.

At first he thought they were going to utterly destroy him, so he closed his eyes again…but then it became clear that it wasn’t him they had utterly destroyed…
All the ghost Pokemon had fired their shadow balls into Relinquiss, causing him to absorb so much dark energy that he simply exploded like a balloon.

Pikachu was speechless. In fact, everyone was speechless. A young female Sableye put down her claws and turned to face her fellow ghosts.

Sableye: …now we can retreat.

With not more than a glance over their shoulders, the former ghost army silently fled the battlefield, seeming to dissolve into the trees. Not a single one remained.

Flynn stepped up beside Breela, who was looking on with an expressionless face.

Flynn: should…should we pursue them ma’am?

Breela: no…let them go. We’ve defeated them already, there’s no use in killing them. That would make us no better than Spiteshade was. Let us be happy with the victory we’ve grasped today…
------------------------------------
My my my, that was a bit graphic! Just how many Pokemon died in that update? What is freaking wrong with me? This will probably be the last update on this fic for a week, so in the mean time, just read my other one and the ones I’m co-writing.

 

[MewtwoMaster2002]

great update. Which fics are you co-writing other than the ones I've posted in?

 

[NESSBOUNDER]

Nah. Only those two.

 

[PsiFlameMaster]

argh, that was a bit graphic, but cool! my favorite part was when Pikachu killed SpiteShade. AWSOME!!! go Pika! lol! if you ask me, Pikachu should have agilitied/quick attacked out of the way of Relinquiss's soul consume attack through the tree, since sometimes you can go through platforms with it in SSB/SSBM. anyways, that was great. i go back to school tomarrow. AARRGGGHHH!!! O well. cya guys later.

 

[NESSBOUNDER]

...I don't think Pikachu could have quick attacked through a tree, although it would be funny to watch.

KA-THUNK!!! (tiim-beeeeeerrrr!!)

Anyone who reads this fic, please read Kirby Khronicles as well, because it's got some samples of what this fic will be like when the annoyingly long war is over.

 

[PsiFlameMaster]

ya. it would be funny if he left a silhouette shaped hole in it. lol! i'll check out Kirby Khronicles soon. cya!

 

[Pokemasterkatie]

I can imagine it...Pi-ka, Pika of the Pokés, watch out for that tree(cko)!

Holy ****; has Blaze, my own Blaziken, actually--DEAD?! I'm starting to regret putting him in this Poké-war in the first place... But PIKACHU, whoa...Now THERE'S the Pokémon from Ash Ketchum's team we all know and love!^_^ Speaking of Pikachu, take a guess at what Gamecube game I'm currenly playing...

 

[MewtwoMaster2002]

Gee could it be pokemon colloseum or poke channel. so the war continues. it must end some day. Pikachu wouldn't be able to quick attack through a tree cuz it's thick. If he could I'd imagine him to make a hole that will cause the tree to fall.

 

[NESSBOUNDER]

Blaze isn't dead...If he was dead, I would have wrote something like: "Relinquiss laughed in evil delight as he consumed Blaze's helpless body, tearing his soul apart like a curtain" or something like that. Rellie dropped Blaze and went after Pikachu instead. Sorry if I didn't make it too clear. I've recently been training Relinquiss on my game. He's just evolved and annoys the heck out of my friend. Spiteshade is already on level 50 and I use her in battle tower sometimes along with Breela and Twinkles...OOPS!! I didn't say Twinkles, there is no rutheless Pokemon mercenary in my story called Twinkles and he's not going to turn up later...oh crud...

 

[Pokemasterkatie]

MM2002, It's Pokémon Channel--Collosseum doesn't come out in America until March! Blaze's still alive, phew! Guess I misunderstood... There's no way in h*ll my lil' Blaziken's gonna go the way of Spiteshade/Relinquiss(I hope)!

 

[MewtwoMaster2002]

Oh man I didn't know. I saw posters for colloseum at 7 eleven so I keep remembering it. I didn't put my own cuz the last pokemon game I got was silver and the only non-legendaries I have are the last evolution of the three starters in silver but I guess no old pokemon are allowed to be added. I hadn't pmed you in a long time.

 

[NESSBOUNDER]

guess what? I AM gOING TO UPDATE THIS STORY AFTER ALL!!! STuff the Pokemon one, I've got this fic to think about, and Kirby Khronicles which is sucking me dry of tarded ideas.
I'll start writing an update later today! (after I check how my town is coming along and have a screen break)

 

[NESSBOUNDER]

CHAPTER: um I’m not going to bother.

While all this was going on in Pokemon world, Ness and his friends were stuck upon just what to do about Fox. It was obvious that Pokey and Specll wouldn’t have missed him.

Ness: well…Kirby says we should bust in there and kick bottie, but what happened last time we did that?

Marth: we got thrashed by a giant tumor…

Roy: I MANAGED TO HIT HIM!! ARE YOU PROUD OF ME?

Marth: very. You’ll be my stooge in no time.

Roy: YYYES!! I’M GETTING SOMEWHERE!!

Paula: Roy, why do you idolize Marth?

Roy: BECAUSE HE’S SECOND BEST TIER IN THE ACADEMY, AND HE’S JUST AWESOME!! RIGHT, MARTH?

Marth: I am. Thank you for noticing, Roy…but please stop shouting. You’re loud.

Kirby: I may not think well of Fox, but I’m not going to bum out of this one. Let’s go and get him back, then we can look into this “Dark Missionary” thing. Righyoh?

Ness: yah. Let’s go. I can trace Edward’s magical pattern easily.

Adeline: hmm…I don’t know, I say we need a strategy.

G&W: no strategy required, we’re rescuing Fox. We’ll just swoop in there and take him, then beat it!

Ness: Game and Watch is right. I say we do it, and why don’t you like Fox, Kirby?

Kirby narrowed his little eyes.

Kirby: Falco told me a lot about Fox…and most of it wasn’t good, mind you.

Ness: Falco? What the…Falco was probably just trying to get you to distrust Fox! Falco tells a lot of lies!

Kirby: well he’s making it happen.

Ness: stuff you Kirby…ARE WE READY TO ROCK AND ROLL, PEOPLES??

All: OH, YEAH!!

Roy: ARE YOU READY TO FEEL MY HEAT? HII-YAA!!!

Marth: calm down Roy. Wipe this splodge off my cape if you please.

Roy: WITH PLEASURE, MARTH!!

Roy made a huge ceremony of wiping a little bit of dirt off Marth’s cape and then earned himself a direct look from the prince.

Roy: HE LOOKED AT ME!!! WOWWWW!! HIIIIIIII-YAH!!

$#%^*&$%*^&^*%^

Fox awoke from his mellow dreams and looked around the forest clearing. Upon further inspection, he found himself tied to a tree, and the reality hit him with the force of a jackhammer.

Fox: wah…WHAT IS THIS?? Where am I?

Pokey: wakey wakey…Have a nice time in La-la land?

Fox strained against the thick ropes and found he couldn’t break them. He focused his mind on the Fire Fox, trying to burn through the bonds, but his fire seemed to have no effect.

Pokey: I’ve sprayed those ropes with a can of fire-proof stuff I carry around with me. It’s always handy to be prepared, right Eddie?

Edward: ThAT It Is, POkEh@!!

Fox desperately looked around for Specll. The pink fox had his back turned to the scene and was looking into the trees. Pokey walked up to Fox and grabbed his whiskers, yanking to the left so that his captive was looking into his eyes.

Pokey: pay attention when I’m talking, McCloud, I don’t like ignorant people or animals!

Fox: w-what are you going to do with me?

Pokey: ha ha ha…you’re scared, aren’t you? Well I’m not going to spoil it for you; it’ll be much more fun to watch the look on your face when you find out for yourself.

Fox twisted his head to try and lock eyes with Specll, but Specll still wasn’t facing him. Pokey grabbed Fox’s whiskers again and jerked hard, bringing tears to his eyes.

Pokey: hey! Don’t look to your ex-brother for help! He’s not going to feel sorry for you at the last moment and save you from me. That sort of thing just doesn’t happen.

Fox: nnnggDON’T PULL MY WHISKERS!!! I…just tell me! What are you going to do??

Pokey: well…I’m sure Specll could tell you, after all, he’s experienced it before…But because he’s not talking to you, I’d better give you a hint.
Giygas’s followers have positioned three creatures in separate worlds know as the “Dark Missionaries.”
These shadows excrete powerful waves of evil energy that cause the evil in weak-minded people and beasts to overtake them. An effect I’m sure Ness has witnessed first hand. However, Ness didn’t manage to destroy these Dark Missionaries along with Giygas, in fact…he never even found them.
And now they’re doing their jobs once more. However, in order to survive, a Dark Missionary needs to consume pain and agony from a victim. And the one down here isn’t doing to well, because the inhabitants of Pop star are a little bit…frail and it can’t absorb enough from them.
Do you catch my drift, Fox?

Fox’s eyes opened wide with panic. He looked to his left again to try to glimpse Specll. This time, the pink fox was looking at him with a dark, expressionless stare.
“please…don’t do this to me..” Fox silently pleaded with his eyes. Specll turned his head and looked away. There was only one option left to Fox now, and he used it as best he could.

Fox: no! NO!! Don’t do this!!! PLEASE, NO! I…I’ll tell you anything you want, just don’t let that monster feed off me!!

Fox twisted his head and flattened his ears back against his scull in a panicked frenzy.

Fox: SPECLL!! DO SOMETHING! I’M SORRY ABOUT WHAT I SAID TO YOU, I’LL DO ANYTING! ANYTHING AT ALL, JUST DON’T LET THEM DO THIS TO ME!!!

Specll slowly walked up to Fox and stared into his tear-stained eyes. Fox stopped pleading and watched as his half-brother shook his pink head.

Specll: look at you now, Fox. Where has all your loyalty gone to?

Fox suddenly realized what he’d been doing. He gritted his fangs and hung his head with disgust in himself. Specll spoke once more.

Specll: see? Perhaps now you understand what I’ve been going through, and just how easy it is to betray…

Fox closed his eyes and began sobbing in fear. Specll clenched his fist as the tears splattered onto the soft grass. He turned and solemnly walked out of the forest clearing, adding a quiet word to Pokey as he went.

Specll: do not take advantage of my absence.

Fox had only once felt such terror before. Memories flew back as he envisioned the tree behind him as a totem pole…and now Pokey was advancing towards him…it was too much, Fox’s mind snapped. He began crying, crying like a terrified cub.

Pokey: well look at brave Mr. McCloud! If only your daddy could see you now! HAHAHAHAA!! The thought tickles me pink! Now I feel like having fun with you…

Pokey picked up a long stick and smacked it into Fox’s chest. Fox jerked from the pain, crying out and desperately trying to twist his body from the ropes that held him. Pokey raised the stick above his head and balked. Fox flinched and Pokey laughed cruelly.

Pokey: hahaha!! Oh my, this IS entertaining!

The strain was too much to bear. Fox was hallucinating and he felt incredibly exhausted. He hung his head and whimpered a single word that had saved his life once before…

Fox: …flame…

THWACK!! Pokey continued to beat the helpless fox with his stick. Finally he grew tired of his game and lay down the stick in front of his panting enemy.

Pokey: I’d better stop now; the Dark Missionary should be here soon. Boy will it be pleased. Heh heh heh…your pain threshold is pitiful!

Edward Hemorrhoid slowly edged towards Fox. Fox weakly lifted his head to stare into the line of teeth that Edward had on the top part of his “body.”

Edward: I dOn’T sEe wHY yOu hAd tO go anD bEEt hiM, Pokki…He/S going tO bE in enough PaIN @lreAdy sO0n…

Pokey angrily waved his hand at Edward.

Pokey: because I could. And is that pity I detect? DO YOU FEEL FOR HIM??

Edward: jUsT le@ve hiM alone! HoW w0ulD yoU lIkE it If yOu were uP there, HmM??

Pokey: hahaha…well I’m not up there, am I? And pity is for weaklings. Specll is a weakling, and do you want to end up like him?

Edward: I sUpp0sE I;m a WeeeeekliNG to, th#n. It’S n0T nIce to hItTI someone when thEYY’re do0WNN, oR tieEd to a Tre. HavEW yOu no Honor??

Pokey: honor is for wimps.

Edward: oH iS itT? En-GuaRde, then, PoKeuy!!

Before Pokey could react, Edward had magically hexed him the most killer chafe you’ve ever seen.

Pokey: OW!!! WHAT WAS THAT FOR??

Edward: hOniUR is foR eVeryoNE!! I’M sulking!!

Edward Hemorrhoid disappeared, leaving a twinkle of fairy dust in his wake. Pokey painfully walked over to Fox and angrily yanked at his tail.

Pokey: that fool! He’s not completely with it yet…but that sort of thing takes time…and what’s this? I think our guest is coming, Foxie!

A wave of terror flowed over Fox. He looked around to see a dark fog gathering in front of him as Pokey grinned with evil glee. As the glowing eyes of the Dark Missionary formed right before his face, Fox felt like screaming at the top of his lungs, so that every living creature who might come to his aid would hear. But all that escaped his muzzle was a strangled squeak.

#@$%^#$&%#$^&$%6

Parallel lines and swirling patterns of light shot through Ness’s mind as he PSI traced Edward Hemorrhoid’s magical pattern. His eyes were closed and he was being guided my nothing more than energy readings.
Sure enough, a white sphere appeared out of the corner of his closed right eye, and small lines criss-crossed it over and over again.
Ness turned his body to the right until the sphere was in the center of his vision and continued forwards, stepping to the left to avoid a tree.

Ness: Edward Hemorrhoid is very far away and to the east. But…there’s another power reading coming from the south…and it’s very faint, but I can definitely see it, and something’s fluctuating.

Paula: let me try. I’m better at long-range PSI homage than you are…hmm…uh…yes, Edward is over there and…mmm…and Specll is over there, interesting, they must have split up!

Ness: there’s another power reading that’s almost black in my mind. I almost missed it.

Paula: oh! I see it now…It’s almost completely black! Clever trick, but you can see a dark purple sort of tinge to it.

Ness: I say we follow the dark reading. Edward Hemorrhoid could just be there to throw us off, come on!

Poo: are you fantastically sure?

Jeff: he’s sure, now come on, let’s go!

Ness and his remaining team crept through the undergrowth for what seemed like ages. Finally, Ness could hear faint cries and as he got closer, they became screams.

Ness: oh sh0t, they’re torturing him!!

Ness broke into a run, he didn’t stop to think about anything but rescuing Fox. Soon, the screaming was loud, and chilled Ness to the bone…and it was definitely Fox. Ness remembered his wits and crouched down before crawling into a forest clearing where Fox’s cries were coming from. Once more, his eyes fell upon a horrible scene. Fox was tied to a tree, twisting and jerking his body in a futile attempt to escape his bonds, screaming in panic as the demon beast Ness had seen earlier slowly advanced towards him, its fangs shining with the clear fluid that flowed from its maw.

Ness didn’t know what to do. He seemed paralyzed with awe and fear. Adeline poked her head up next to his and gave a tiny gasp of shock.

Now the Dark Missionary was just centimeters from Fox. The vulpine captive was closing and opening his eyes as if trying to dispel a nightmare, strangled squeaks escaping from his throat. The Dark Missionary opened its invisible mouth…

Ness felt like it was time to act, but his body seemed rooted to the spot. It was as if he just couldn’t move…

Then it happened. The Dark Missionary lunged forward and began tearing at Fox’s skull with its dripping fangs. Fox screamed in agony as the monster tore and bit. Amazingly, the creature didn’t leave any wounds. Its teeth and claws seemed to pass through Fox’s body. But Fox certainly felt the pain.

Ness looked to his right. Pokey was standing there, smiling and clutching his hands with glee. Specll stood next to him, looking away as if nothing was happening.
Now the Missionary was biting into Fox’s chest. Fox wasn’t screaming anymore, his fangs were clenched and he was jerking his head from side to side, mad with pain.
A disgusted look spread over Specll’s face and he stepped forward.

Specll: that’ll do. If you overindulge, he’ll die from the pain!

The Dark Missionary released its grip on Fox, who was crying in sobbing gasps.

D. M.: I have not fed for many days. I have hunger.

Specll: I know, but you’ll have nothing left if he dies. We’ll be leaving this dimension soon, and…well…you won’t be able to feed of us!

Pokey walked forwards and shoved Specll aside.

Pokey: yeah, don’t overdo it. We’ve gotten you your own personal pain slave for you to feed off whenever you choose, and you’d better not waste it, right Spec?

Specll bit his lip until it bled. He turned away from Pokey and made no reply.

The Dark Missionary began to billow like smoke.

D. M: granted. I will feed off him sparingly. But what if he should kill himself?

Specll: WHY CAN’T YOU JUST CONVERT THAT IDIOTIC KING? IS HE NOT GOOD ENOUGH FOR YOU? WHY ARE YOU SO DARN PICKY???

D. M.: I would only do so if I was about to starve to death. He may be stronger than most inhabitants of this land, but I do not care for game like that…

Specll looked as if he was about to explode. He glanced angrily over to Fox, who was still gasping and sobbing, and then spun around to glare at the Missionary again.

Pokey: oh never mind him. Make the fox suffer. Now if you’ll excuse us, we have to go find that idiotic tumor and get out of here. And beware, Ness will be here to try and save his friend.

The Missionary began to glow with rage at the name.

D. M.: the fox shall come with me to my haven, and there I shall hold him. Let Ness come…

With a silent “puff” the Dark Missionary disappeared, taking Fox with him. Just at that very moment, Edward Hemorrhoid appeared.

Pokey: back so soon? Come on, let’s go. The other Missionaries await.

Specll grimly reached into his bag and pulled out a glowing object. It looked like a sort of red jewel. Ness felt Kirby jerk with shock behind him.

Specll: ‘got the item. Let’s go, and I never wish to hear of this place again!

With a massive “WOOBA SH-CHANG!!” Edward, Pokey and Specll vanished.

Ness sat back in the bush. His guts were churning.

Kirby: that’s the hilt of the rainbow sword!!

Adeline: p-poor Fox! We must get him back before that horrible creature can harm him further!

Ness: well…I think I know how we can do that…And it’s easier than you think.

Paula: how?

Ness: well, all we have to do is find the Poppy brothers, beat them up and force them to tell us where the Dark Missionary is hiding…you know…the power reading emitting from that thing is very familiar…

Paula: yeah…I’ve felt it before, but where?

Kirby: I still think we need to see Whispy and Waddle-Dee.

Ness: Pokey…he’s just so…evil! It’s incredible, he’s worse than Edward and Specll put together and multiplied by two!

Poo: once a nasty, scummy drop-kick, always a nasty, scummy drop-kick.

G&W: *sigh* Let’s go, you guys…

Roy: YOU KNOW…I FOUND THAT REALLY AWEFUL TO WATCH, DO ANY OF YOU FEEL THE SAME WAY???!?!

Marth: I think we all do. Now don’t yell.

After a little bit of walking, Kirby eventually found Whispy Woods. Who was filing his roots against a stone.

Kirby: PUYO PUYO!!!!

Whispy: AAAH!!! Don’t SCARE me like that, Kirby!! Ouh!! And just WHAT are you doing in my clearing?

Kirby: hey, have you been noticing anything strange about the Poppy brothers lately?

Whispy: do trees talk? I bet these are your friends. How come I never have any friends? Why, Kirby…

Kirby: weeellll…because you blow?

Whispy: OuH!! And YOU suck!!

Kirby: old news, you BIRCH!!

Whispy: well I NEVER!!!

Kirby: stupid OAK!!

Whispy: that’s appalling!

Kirby: oh, I’m not going to stop there, you’re not out of the woods yet!

Marth: STOP IT! STOP THE HORRIBLE PUNS!!

(Everybody jumps on Kirby and Whispy sticks a root up his ***.)

Whispy: those were absolutely atrocious.

Kirby: that’s still no excuse for you to bugger me with your spiny root!

Everyone: KIRBY!!

Kirby: I mean…uh…Puyo puyo!

Adeline: so Mr. Tree…what can you tell us about the Poppys?

Whispy: the Poppies? Well recently they seem to be worshipping some sort of evil diety…Gillgrass or something like that…but what’s even more alarming is the way they claim to be hiding a really disgusting, horrid monster somewhere on Shiver Star!
I’ve seen the beast myself, and it’s festy. Trust me on that one.

Kirby: Shiver Star? Hmm…I think I know exactly where they’d hide that creepy thing…

Ness: oh great. Come on, then le…Roy, WHAT ARE YOU DOING??

(Roy is carving his initials on Whispy Woods. He looks up and waves at Ness.)

Roy: TREES LIVE FOR BILLIONS OF YEARS!! I’M GOING TO ETCH MY NAME IN BOTANICAL HISTORY!! HIIII-YA!!

Whispy: OH MY, YOU’VE DEFACED ME!! YOU CAD!!

Roy found Whispy’s sharp root carving initials in his leg. He yelled and jumped back. Marth shot forward and boldly stood before Whispy, sword in hand.

Marth: DO NOT ATTACK MY STOOGE!!

Marth slapped Whispy and made the tree cower.

Roy: awesome…

Ness:…uh…yeah…totally awesome.

------------------------________-
Another nasty update, but I balanced it out nicely with funny stuff. Never mind, next update will be silly as pie.

 

[MewtwoMaster2002]

Ahahahaha great update. Oh no Specll is betraying Fox even more.

 

[PsiFlameMaster]

hey. im at school right now so i dont have much time. the dark missionary is an interesting idea. i REALLY feel sorry for Fox, what with feeling the pain of being eaten and all. heheh...

Marth: DON'T ATTACK MY STOOGE!!!

priceless. anyway, i better go b4 i get caught. later!

 

[NESSBOUNDER]

I got Mario and Luigi, superstar saga and it's like freaki'n cheese on toast! AWESOME GAME!!!@#!# (And finally, Mario actually USES his flaming palm in battle! Top said!!)

I'll update maybe tonight.

 

[NESSBOUNDER]

CHAPTER 7: PART 5(I think...)

Once Ness had PSI Teleported everyone to the cold planet Shiver Star, it became apparent that he’d miscalculated and they were all sent flying across the slippery ice at breakneck speed!
Bam, Whop, smack, piff, ouch! The line of people smashed into a rock that jutted up in their path.

Ness: owie…

Kirby: I’ll travel by warp star any day…

Marth: I think I sprained my gums…

SUDDENLY, A GROUP OF POPPY BROTHERS ATTACKED THEM!!!

NESSBOUNDER: oh no! An incredibly cheap plot line! (Changes it.)

Ness turned around to see a large number of Poppy brothers staring at them.

Ness: oopsie. I still stand by the fact that it wasn’t my fault and that Paula distracted me.

Paula: why did you LET me distract you, psidork?

Poppy brother leader: get them!!

Everyone jumped on the Poppy brother squad and beat the tar out of them.

Ness: they’re running away! Quick, catch one!

Marth: don’t worry, I saw to it already.

Ness turned around to see Marth sitting on a Poppy brother, who was squirming beneath the prince’s buttocks.

Roy: MARTH’S AMAZING!! HE ALWAYS MANAGES TO DO SOMETHING COOL, EVEN WHEN HE SLIPS AND FALLS OVER!

Marth: shut up, Roy! I didn’t slip and fall over, I did it deliberately to catch one of these little scumbags.

Poppy: get off me!

Marth: never! The rearguard will never surrender!

Roy: BANK TO THE LEFT!!

Everyone: (?_?)

Kirby: now this time, I get to make him talk. Oh little Poppy brother…TELL US WHERE YOU’RE HIDING THE DARK MISSIONARY OR I’LL EAT YOU!!

Poppy: is that all you got?

Kirby: oh for heaven’s sake, slap him, Marth.

It only took five seconds of slapping and the Poppy brother was spouting information like an overactive volcano spouts hot toffee. (And no, it’s not called Magma. Magma is a style of Japanese cartooning.)

Rawk berry: DOIp!

Poppy: the Dark Missionary is being hidden in the lolly factory just over there…(points to a big factory on the horizon.) And that’s all the information I’ll give you, please don’t slap me again.

Adeline: and you won’t go blowing our cover. (Draws a strip over the Poppy brother’s mouth, sealing it. He runs away, going “mmf, mmf, mmf.”)

Kirby: the lollie factory! Just as I suspected. Come on, let’s storm the place!

Adeline: yeah! Guerilla tactics are best!

The doors of the lollie factory were closed, but it only took a nine hammer by Mr. Game and Watch to open it. Inside, it was dark and dingy.

Kirby: it’s dark and dingy. (comical laugh.) And that’s really strange. That thing is here, alright…

Ness: first we have to free Fox…does this place have a dungeon?

Kirby: the treacle room looks like a mine. And it also has dungeon cells that are made of hardened rock candy, completely invincible to the naked eye. (comical laugh.)

Ness: fine, take us there.

Kirby: right. Shouldn’t be too hard, I can remember just where it is.

Kirby led Ness and his friends through a series of doors and rooms, and eventually they came to…

Sound Effects: Du-du-du duuuuumm!! The treacle room!!

Ness: I’ll open the door on the count of three…by the way, isn’t it strange that we haven’t run into any enemies?

Kirby: it’s like…totally not cool to have enemies all over the place, you know…These days you’ve got to go sparingly on the bad guys.

Ness: right! (opens the door to the treacle room.)

Ness wasn’t quite prepared for how hot the treacle room actually was. The whole room was lit in a sinister way by a fountain of boiling hot treacle spewing up out of the floor and running down a pipe.
Ness crept through the dungeon-like treacle room in awe and wonder.

Ness: scary!

Kirby: yeah. And boy, it’s hot, isn’t it?

Paula: kind of like a volcano!

Roy: IT’S NOT HOT…

Marth: shhhh!! Don’t scream!

Ness began looking around for Fox, and heard a slight sob above the bubbling of the treacle. Ness closed his eyes and focused on Fox’s life force, homing in on him with closed eyes.
Ness’s searches led him to a large iron door, which opened to reveal Fox, chained to the ground on the floor, his fur wet with perspiration and his arms and legs spread out so he couldn’t move.

Fox: …p…please…water…just some…water…

Ness realized that Fox’s fur must have made the heat seem unbearable, and he was suffering from heatstroke. Ness knew how to cure heatstroke.

Ness: PSI Healing a…

A bright grey light surrounded Fox briefly. He stopped panting and looked up at Ness with an unmatchable look of relief on his face.

Fox: Ness!! Ness…it’s really you! Get me out of these chains, hurry!

Adeline pulled an eraser out of her pocket and rubbed apart the chains. Fox sat up, breathing heavily. Kirby ran over and gave him a drink from a small water bottle which he’d “borrowed” of Poo’s items.

Fox: Ness…I…I feel so terrible, I almost betrayed you to save myself. I’m sorry.

Ness: it’s only natural for someone to do that, given the circumstances, Fox. I know I probably would have if the Dark Missionary was about to do that to me.

Poo: m…MY WATER! KIRBY WENT INTO MY PACK AND TOOK MY WATER!! Theifer!

Kirby:…and be grateful for that water, you slimy opportunist!

Ness: hey! Don’t speak to Fox like that! You don’t have to believe everything Falco told you!

Fox: Falco?? THAT B……. I hate him sometimes. I swear he’s trying to ruin my life!

Ness: have you been badly hurt, Fox? You look terrible.

Fox: no. That…thing hasn’t gotten round to attacking me a second time. But oh Ness…you have no idea how much fear I was in. Chained down there, totally unable to move my arms or legs, in that sweltering heat…
There was only two moments I’ve ever felt so helpless, one was with that Smash spirit in the library, and the other…the other I have recurring nightmares about…

Ness: you can tell me later, right now, we’ve got to get out of here, and find that Dark Mi…whOA!!

Ness turned around to see the Dark Missionary standing in the doorway, its glowing eyes staring ruthlessly at Fox.

D. M: I see your friends have come to your aid, furry one…but you have not escaped my hunger yet.

The Dark Missionary turned to Ness and glared at him. Ness felt a chill run down his spine.

D. M: so this is Ness…yes, I can sense your power. It is possible that you may have defeated Master Giygas…but your heroism was a lie. Your victory was like an assassin striking from behind. Giygas was out of his mind, and you took that opportunity to defeat him. BUT YOU SHALL NOT DEFEAT ME!! KKSSAAAAAAHHHH!!!!

Ness watched in awe and fear as the Dark Missionary’s body grew to at least twice its normal size, and its fangs and claws elongate into deadly spears of darkness. The Dark Missionary second form towered over Ness and roared, its eyes flashing on and off in a dizzying pattern.

D. M: ddddiiiEEEE!!! AAHrrrroRRRrrRRHRRH!!

Ness: to arms! Let’s blast this thing!!

The Dark Missionary roared and lunged at Ness. Ness raised his baseball bat over his head and smacked it out of its attack.
Dazed, the evil shadow swiped to its left and caught Paula with its claws. She was lucky, though, and came out of the attack without too much damage. Now the right claw gathered a black sphere and hurled it at Ness again. Ness was unprepared for the attack and it struck him in the chest. He struggled to his feet and drew his bat to his side.

Ness: Poo? Jeff? Are we ready?

Poo and Jeff: yes Ness!!

Ness: BRAIN SPIKER!!

Ness held his bat out if front of him with both hands. Poo jumped up onto the bat and was launched into the air. Jeff ran underneath him so he landed on his shoulders, backwards.
Jeff then yelled and ran at the Dark Missionary. At the last moment, Poo grabbed his King’s sword and fell backwards over Jeff while holding the sword above his head, the sword swinging down in an ark and planting itself firmly in the Dark Missionary’s scull. As the monster roared, Jeff used Poo as a pole vault and jumped up high, hammering the sword in with his feet. Ness then ran in, jumped up with Jeff, grabbed the sword and fell backwards onto Poo, jerking the sword out.
The Dark Missionary showed signs of taking severe damage. It shrieked and clawed at its head…and then stopped, cackled and counterattacked with its mighty claws, bowling Ness to the ground.

Paula: I…I know this sounds stupid, but you just HEALED it!

Ness: no way! *ouch* What kind of freak get healed from a sword implanted into its skull?

Fox: you vile monster! Here’s my payback for what you’ve done to me!

Fox reached into his inventory and took out an Arwing bomb. Everyone blocked their ears and Fox hurled the explosive with a deafening BOOOOOMM!!!

When the energy cleared, the Dark Missionary stood there, completely unharmed by it, and, definitely looking a lot more powerful.

Ness: w…what Paula says is true! We’re healing it! How?

D. M: HAHAHAHAHA FOOLS!! Do you not understand? I am a creature of darkness who thrives on pain! ALL FORMS OF PAIN! If you try to harm me, it will simply increase my power. I CANNOT BE DEFEATED!

The Dark Missionary’s eyes began to glow. It swung its claw in and grabbed hold of Adeline, chewed on her for a bit, and then spat threw her across the room into Mr. Game and Watch, damaging both of them.

Ness realized that he’d faced a situation like this before…he turned to Paula as an idea formed in his mind.

Ness: Paula! Pray! Pray now!

Paula nodded and put her hand together. Ness suddenly felt his body melting into dreams as he once again found himself in a beautiful, wide valley. He jerked in surprise when he noticed Kirivia standing beside him again.

Kirivia: Ness…you are calling for my help once again…I can sense it. The gift I gave to you can still help you, while I may not. Try, Ness! Try to use the Chandler’s wishbone in a different way!

The vision ended. Paula looked up unhappily.

Paula: I didn’t get anything, Ness!

Ness: don’t worry; I did…WHO’S GOT THE BROKEN PIECES OF THE CHANDLER’S WISHBONE?

Jeff: I…I um…I used to, but I used them in my latest invention! Here…I don’t know what it is, but I made it somehow. Take it!

Ness grabbed the rod-like instrument and turned around, only to receive a claw across his face. He fell to the ground, paralyzed by some kind of force. Marth and Fox ran across and stood between him and the Dark Missionary.

D. M: AARRH!! DO NOT TRY TO RESIST! YOUR FATES ARE SEALED!

As the monster charged forwards, Adeline quickly streaked across its path, laying a trail of paint in the air. The Dark Missionary tripped and melted into the floor. It popped up again behind Ness and prepared for a claw attack.
But Ness was on his feet already, and he dodged. As Fox and Adeline distracted the Dark Missionary, he brought the new item up to his face for a closer inspection, and suddenly his vision started up again and he found himself in the valley once more.

Kirivia: Ness! You have in your possession the Channeler’s baton! That is an ancient weapon used many years ago by the mutansprite lords to purge evil from their shrines.

The vision ended and Ness realized that he was about to get slashed. He rolled to one side and struck the Channeler’s baton against the Dark Missionary’s open claw. The beast roared in surprise and its body froze temporarily.

Poo: great! Now what do we do?

Ness: we HEAL it! Come on guys! Use your healing powers on that Dark Missionary! GO Go go!

Ness placed his hand on the Dark Missionary and used Lifeup c. Its shadowy form began to waver and it released a piercing shriek.

Ness: YEAH! ALL SYSTEMS GO!

Poo jumped in and helped Ness by using his healing powers. Adeline painted up a thunder and ice star and gave it to Kirby.

Kirby: FRIDGE KIRBY!!

Fridge Kirby used his healing snacks against the foe. The Dark Missionary quickly broke out of the Canneler’s spell and caught Ness with its chew and spit attack.
Poo tried to use Lifeup again, but the Dark Missionary seemed to repel him before he got close enough.

G&W: (using Judgment hammer over and over) come on, COME ON! Do what I want you to!

Ness: Poo, I have to use the baton to disable the evil shield around its body! Everyone just stand back and try not to get hurt!

Just as Ness said this, the Dark Missionary launched into a counterattack and knocked Fox, Paula and Adeline off their feet. Ness countered the counter, but then the Dark Missionary countered his counter counter, and Ness countered the counter that the Dark Missionary used against the counter he used to counter its counter, smacking it with the baton once again.

Then it was healing time! Mr. Game and Watch finally found the seven hammer he wanted and threw the food it produced, Adeline painted up some maximum tomatoes that did awesome damage, and Kirby continued to fridge away like a maniac.

Finally, the monster fizzled and fell apart with a deft “pfoff” noise, destroyed.

Ness: hey! That wasn’t so hard…

Paula: no, but perhaps it had something to do with the way that beast wasn’t as powerful as it could have been, remember what Specll said? It hadn’t gotten any nutrition from the inhabitants of Pop star.

Ness: we have to destroy the other two Dark Missionarys. I’m pretty sure Specll and Pokey won’t be going to them, but I could trace the energy.

Fox: I say we leave them till later and get Pokey and Specll first.

Ness: yes. We’ll be stronger then.

Kirby: oh kay, I suppose you guys will be going now, right?

Ness: yeah, to the…(reads energies) to the Crossing zone!

Kirby: the Crossing zone? Isn’t that where they make those video games about us?

Fox: oh yeah! The trippy dimension that links to every other Ninendo system. I remember being asked to sign a contract for some of those guys so they could make a game about Starfox…but I haven’t received a single credit from it yet.

Ness: I reckon you’d like going there, because you won’t have to change species again.

Adeline: I wanna come with you.

Ness: what?

Adeline: take me along! I want to help you save the universe, Ness!

Fox: hmmm, I don’t know…

Kirby: oh take her along, she’s really useful. I won’t miss her.

Adeline: hay!

Ness: alright. The more the merrier I suppose. I’ll explain everything to you later, Adeline.

Adeline: bye Kirby!

Kirby: hope you get intergalactic jet-lag!

Roy: OH MARTH! I FOUGHT WELL, ARE YOU PROUD OF ME!?

Marth: yes Roy, I’m proud of you!

Roy: OH…(tears) OH THANK YOU MARTH C-CAN I KISS YOUR FEET?

Marth: you have proven yourself worthy of my admiration. Go ahead, kiss my feet.

~and therefore, silhouetted in the beautiful glow of the treacle room, Roy slowly sank to his knee and Kissed Marth’s foot. And it was so touching, that everybody cried.~
(soppy music ends)

Kirby: oh my weeping heart. So tender a moment is seldom witnessed…

Roy: YYYYYEYEESSS!!!!! I HAVE KISSED MARTH’S FOOT! MY LIFELONG DREAM HAS BEEN REALISED AT LAST! HI-YAAA!

Fox: come on Ness, let’s get out of this mad house.

Ness wiped the tears from his eye and started the PSI teleport. In a few seconds they were gone, and with a new member added to the team.
-_--------___________
Next up is Animal Crossing time!! Are you readyah!?

 

[MewtwoMaster2002]

Great update. So he was easy and the others take more than 1 post.

 

[NESSBOUNDER]

CHAPTER 7: PART 6 (looooooooooooooooooong update!)

Ness’s PSI portal opened and everyone spewed out onto the snowy ground in a heap. Ness got up and dusted himself off as Fox grumbled behind him.

Fox: I swear, I say I SWEAR that the warp portal is out to get us all. Look at me! Covered in snow and dirt! And…HOLY CR#P!! MY HEAD IS HUGE!!!

And it was.

Ness: yeah…you’ll have to get used to that. Everyone has a big head here.

Fox: gee, that’s easy for you to say…hey! I’M NOT WEARING PANTS!!

Ness: you don’t need to.

Fox: oh…I see…

Poo: why, look at that! We haven’t changed species…except Mr. Game and Watch.

Mr. Game and Watch was human again. He waved his arms around and fell over.

G&W: stupid third dimension! I’ll never get used to it!

Ness scanned the snowy landscape. In the distance he could clearly make out a town clock. There was a railroad track running along the top and stretching out as far as his eye could make out.

Paula: come on, let’s go to the town and chase Specll and Pokey…No doubt they’ve gone in there.

It didn’t take long to get to town. Once there, everyone stared in awe at the not-really-bustling activity going on. There were only three animals that Ness could see, and they were playing with a ball.

Fox: come on, let’s start our enquiries. Um…Hi! How’ya going?

The animals looked up. One of them was a pink duck with brown hair and freckles on her beak, the other was a blue bull with sleepy-looking eyes, and the third was a little white dog with blue tips on droopy ears and a kind smile. The duck spoke first.

Freckles: heya ducky! I haven’t seen you bunch around here! A…are you travelers, or what?

Ness: well, yes, we are.

The white dog smiled and clapped her tiny paws.

Daisy: oh that’s great! We rarely get any interesting visitors around here! Welcome to Fortown, bow WOW! I’m Daisy, This is Freckles, and that is Stu.

Stu: hey…what’s up moo-dudes?

Paula: hey…so…we’re looking for three guys, one of them’s a fox with pink fur and a whispy fringe, the other’s a really fat…ugly…smelly…fat….fat….tubby human with blonde hair, and the last one’s a…um…he’s a…

Ness: well he goes around dressed as a giant tumor, you know, he thinks it’s Halloween every day of the year, heheheh…

Daisy: well…no, I’m sorry. The only fox that’s in town at the moment is Crazy Redd, and he’s not pink, bow WOW!

Freckles: and the only human I’ve ever met…well…besides you…is our local working bellionare, Jonny!

Fox: (whispering to Ness) Johnny? Isn’t that Capt. Falcon’s pet bum?

Ness: no, that’s spelt J-O-H-N-N-Y, this guy doesn’t have a H in his name…

Daisy: actually, you should be able to find Jonny running around town right now, or he’d be out hanging with Pecan or Kiki…I’m sure he’d love to show you around! You can’t miss him, he always wears a blue tailored suit with a bow tie on his head. He’s much more cluey than us.

Ness: thanks…

Stu: so who are you guys?

Ness: oh..uh, well…um…my name is…er…Lane, and this is Fawkes, Poopskie, Pauline, Jeef, Mr. G and Adelibar!

Stu: oh, hi…It’s just that I feel I kinda have seen you before…moo dude.

Ness: I doubt it. COME ON, LET’S GO!!

Everyone sprinted away from the drio of animals and ran into a paved area with four houses in it, one being significantly larger than the other.

Jonny: hey there! You guys must be new here, right?

Ness spun around to see a chirpy boy in a blue buttoned and very posh-looking hat and shirt with a bow tie on his forehead.

Ness: hi…it’s Jonny, right?

Jonny: yeah. Welcome to Fortown. I’m responsible for how this town came to be so pretty, and it’s easy to say that I actually do more for this place than the mayor, who is a useless old fart. Pleased to meet you!

Ness: yeah, you too.

Jonny: it’s cool to see some more humans…will you lot be staying long?

Ness: it depends…

Jonny: ah well, you’ve chosen a good time to come! We’re having a big, fat sale day! Yeah, Tom Nook and Crazy Redd are both here with specials for us to enjoy, although Redd’s specials are more like ripoffs, but you can’t blame him, he’s poor and has to make a living somehow! HAHAHAHA!! I used to sell things for ridiculous prices too, and look at me now! I’m a Bellionare!! HAHAHAHA!!

Jonny walked over to Fox and shook his paw.

Jonny: have you ever met Redd before?

Fox: no, sorry I don’t know him.

Jonny: oh right. Well foxes are alright by my books, so you make yourselves at home. In fact, if you want to, you can come and stay at my place if you want! Yeah, foxes and cats are always welcome in Jonny’s humble abode.

Fox: oh? Why just foxes and cats?

Jonny: well…cats and foxes are my favorite type of animal! I’m not racist or anything, I’m just like that…Which would explain why this town doesn’t have many monkeys or elephants or bears in it. MUHAHAHA!!!

Jonny’s eye glinted evilly. He rubbed his hands together and grinned.

Jonny: yes-seree! Any monkeys, bears, elephants, or any other type of animal I dislike will receive a pitfall on their doorstep and nasty mail within the first day they arrive here…and if they don’t start packing the next day…well let’s just say I have other methods of persuasion. MUAHAHAHA!!

Fox: good on you, keep that riffraff out of town. Teach them what it’s like to be rejected!

Jonny: I like you! What’s your name?

Fox: Fo…Fawkes.

Jonny: awesome…care to have tea at my place so we can chat somewhere warmer?

Ness: um…we need to ask you some questions…

Jonny: oops, look at that, I have an errand to get around to…will you follow me? You can ask me on the way.

Ness: (following Jonny) so..tell me, have you seen a pink fox and a fat boy come past here?

Jonny: if there was a fox in town I think I’d be the first one to know, and the first one to greet him or her. And no, the only fox in town right now is Redd, and he’s not pink.

Ness: so I heard…er…this may sound stupid, but has anything important gone missing lately?

Jonny: well, yes! Someone half-inched my house model, which normally sits near the train station. Worthless b*ast#$%s...as if they didn’t have anything better to do…

Ness quickly did a mental scan and realized that Specll and Pokey had already left the dimension! Cursing under his breath, he turned to Fox.

Ness: Specll’s already gone. We missed him.

Fox: crud…

Jonny: on a side note, Tom Nook has been acting strangely lately…and he’s looking somewhat more feminine since I last saw him, too.

Ness: strangely? How do you mean?

Jonny: well, he’s been grumpy and nasty to people…he laughs strangely. And his eyes look different now. And just a few nights ago, a traveler come to the town, went into Tom’s shop…and never came back out.

Ness shot Paula a glance. She responded by nodding her head slightly.

Jonny: and he’s been preparing for a furniture sale to end all furniture sales. I believe Blaire got a free sample, and she hasn’t come out of her house since… this is getting strange. OOOOOH!!! AAAARRRHH!!!

Ness: WHAT??

Jonny: LOOK! OVER THERE!! A WEED!!!

Ness: >.< ‘

Jonny raced over to the weed and made a huge ceremony about pulling it up. He returned looking hot and flustered and very angry.

Fox: so Jonny…have there been any other strange occurrences?

Jonny: oh! I get it, you must be an undercover cop or something! I’m so glad that a fox finally made it into the police force! Good on you!

Snake: hey, wassup, bunyip?

A pink rabbit wearing a thin black parka walked up and waved to Jonny.

Snake: top of the morning to ya, bunyip! Who are your friends…

Ness: I’m Lane, this i…

Snake: hey, you, the fox…you know that you are the splitting image of Fox McCloud the Mercenary superstar?

Fox: (EEP!!)

Snake: no..like…you could pull off the perfect masquerade if you wanted to. Yeah! You even have a Starfox jacket! I’ve always wanted a Starfox jacket…I’ll trade you for this cream sofa?

Fox: n-no..you keep it, my jacket’s not for sale…

Snake: oh too bad. Fox McCloud is so cool! And he’s not a sleazy creep like Redd or those other vulpine bums you see nowadays…

Jonny: watch what you say about Redd or foxes in general around me, Snake…

Snake: oh, sorry Jonny, I forgot you were here…Hey! You look like Ness, Lane! And…and that chick looks like Paula! And WOW! You look like Poo! And this fellow bears a striking resemblance to Jeff. OOH! You have the same silhouette as Mr. Game and Watch! And this little girl looks like…um…what was her name again? That painter girl Kirby hangs out with, yeah! You guys all look like celebrities! What an amazing coincidence! Hahaha!

Ness: yes..it’s a very…VERY lucky coincidence…heheh….

Rawk Berry: DING BLOP!

Sound effects: feelings…falling from the ceiling…la la la, oh I got the words wrong.

Jonny: what was that?

Fox: ignore it. It’ll go away after a while…

Suddenly, Snake picked up a sharp, large pebble at his feet and pegged it at Fox’s head. Fox yelped and put up his reflector shield out of pure instinct, sending the stone flying over the treetops.

Fox: WHAT DID YOU DO THAT FOR, YOU LITTLE CREEP?

Snake was grinning the most hugest grin Ness had seen in a long time, and was jumping up and down, clapping his hands.

Snake: You ARE Fox McCloud! I KNEW IT! I JUST KNEW IT!

Fox: !!!! oh ****…

Jonny: wow! I can’t believe it! It’s really Fox McCloud! How awesome! Show me your fire fox! I wanna see your fire fox!

Snake: autographs! Autographs! I’m gonna be the first to get Fox’s autograph!!

Jonny: you’ll have to beat me to it!

Fox: WHOA! WHOA! SETTLE DOWN!! (Gets bowled over by Snake and Jonny as they fight over him.)

Ness: alright, we are superheroes. Just calm down and you’ll all get our autographs.

A few autographs later, Jonny had Ness’s troop over to his big house for dinner. Ness had agreed, seeing as his feet were sore, and that he’d felt hungry. As they approached Jonny’s house, the Gyroid at the front step began to spastically wiggle its body and arms.

Gyroid: OOMPH!! WELCOME HOME JONNY!!! WELCOME WELCOME WELCOM!!!!

The Gyroid was going crazy now, it was VIOLENTLY twirling around like a super sped in a highly disturbing manner.

Fox: eek! What is that thing!? Is it dangerous?

Jonny: that’s just my Gyroid assistant. Please ignore him, he’s just a tad hyperactive. Come on in!

Gyroid: (wriggling at the speed of sped) FFGSHWBLBBLEBLEBLblEOIblblbAKSFLKGMEZZ!!!
AAAPTHS!! Bloblblblblblblblbbleah! TOOS! KUJJIMERTSzCH!

Fox: um…protect me, Ness!

Ness: don’t worry. Gyroids are harmless. They actually were made by certain cultures to stay outside tombs and decorate the entrance.

Fox: the more you know…

Jonny: well don’t just stand there gawping at my Gyroid! Come inside!

Inside Jonnys house, it was fruity to say the least. In fact, he’d decorated the entire thing using a citrus theme.

Ness: wow…nice house…

Jonny: why thank you Ness, thank you mutchly. I appreciate your compliment.

Paula: mmm…yeah, hey, look at this fish!

Jonny: DON’T TOUCH MY CHOELICANTH!! I spent ages trying to catch that fish, and if you scare it to death, I’ll have to make you pay for it.

Jeff: hey, there’s a top floor!

The top floor was decorated with an imperial theme in mind. It looked very royal and very rich.
Jonny walked over and sat on the throne at the end of the room.

Jonny: so that is my house! How was it?

Fox: very cool. But that wiggly thing at your door…that was disturbing…

Jonny: you think that’s disturbing? You should see my basement, I have twenty different Gyroids down there, all arranged to form a maze of twirling, twisting bodies. I’m saving it up for when I get a guest I don’t like, ant then I can just throw them into the basement for the ultimate torture! WAHAHAH!!!

Ness: oh, really? (glances at Fox.) That’s…very nice, I suppose…So Jonny, about this Tom Nook thing…

Jonny: you want to meet him for yourself? Come on then, I’ve got some time on my hands, let’s go.

Ness: right.

On the way to Nook’s store, Jonny came across Eloise the yellow elephant, and he got very, very angry.

Jonny: oooh! She never gets it, does she!? I’ve pitfalled her, shoved her around, dug up her garden, sent her trash through the mail…AND SHE STILL ISN’T LEAVING!!! This calls for greater measures…

Ness watched as Jonny crept up behind Eloise with his bug net and smacked her across the back of her head.

Eloise: UH? W-who is…

Jonny: (smack!)

Eloise: ow! What the…

Jonny: (smack)

Eloise suddenly got angry. She turned around and faced her grinning tormentor.

Eloise: um…doing that REALLY, REALLY HURTS ME!!! So stop it, OK?

Jonny: no. You have the most awful fashion sense…

Eloise: WHY YOU LITTLE!!!! I OUGHT TO!!! RRRGH!!

Jonny walked back over to Ness and continued walking, leaving Eloise to stamp and fume.

Ness: um…why don’t you just ask her to leave?

Jonny: what’s the fun in that?

Ness was about to reply, when a loud scream brought him to his senses.

Fox: what was that!?

Ness: it came from over there, COME ON!

Fox overtook Ness and barged into a forest clearing, to witness an unusual and strange sight.
Daisy the dog was lying on the ground, covering her face with her paws in fear. Standing over her was a gray squirrel with stripes running over her head and tail. She held aloft an egg beater and was slowly lowering the rotating object down towards her cowering victim. A few meters away, another squirrel was jumping up and down in a panic.

Pecan: Blaire! Stop, what are you doing chipmunk? Leave her alone…oh crud, oh crud…what is wrong with you, STOP!

Blaire’s eyes were glazed and her face was emotionless as she lowered her weapon towards Daisy.

Blaire: you…will…die…nutlet…

Daisy: HELP ME! SOMEBODY DO SOMETHING, BOW WOW!

Fox launched himself at Blaire and tackled her to the ground, wrenching the egg beater out of her arms.

Fox: are you crazy? What are you trying to do, commit a murder in broad daylight?

Blaire: Uh? UH! G-Get off me! I haven’t got any money. You’ll crumple my dress! Get off!! What am I doing in these woods? How’d I get here!?

Daisy just sat there and cried and cried. Ness walked over and consoled her.

Pecan: Blaire, why did you try to kill Daisy? What has gotten into you, chipmunk?

Blaire: I have no idea what you’re talking about, now GET OFF ME, YOU FILTHY VULPINE FREAK! UUURH!!!

Fox released Blaire and she snobbily turned her back on him. She went to walk away, but Pecan blocked her path.

Blaire: look, nutlet, Would you just let me past? I have no idea what I’ve been doing and I must be suffering from amnesia. Just step aside and let me through!

Pecan: aren’t you at least going to apologize to poor Daisy? If you really can’t remember, then let me remind you that you almost murdered her, chipmunk!

Blaire: nonsense! I would never do that. OH FINE, I’m sorry Daisy, but I suspect this is all just a silly prank you’re pulling on me. Hmph, nutlets!

Daisy: I….I….I….(boo hoo hoo)

Ness: hmmm…

Jonny: what was going on? Why is Daisy sitting on the ground crying, and what just happened, Pecan?

Pecan: oh it’s dear Jonny. You’re a bit late, Blaire just tried to kill Daisy with an egg beater. If that nice fox hadn’t have thrown his body at her at the last moment, I wouldn’t know what to do! It would have looked like I’d have stood around and did nothing, and we wouldn’t want that, chipmunk. Blaire says she doesn’t remember a thing of it.

Fox: this is all very strange…and I have reason to believe that we aught to visit Tom Nook as quickly as we possibly can!

#$%^#$^&$#%^&$%6

By the time everyone got to Nookington’s, just about every animal in the village had come to see what the commotion was all about. Ness walked over to the shop and was about to go in, but heard yelling coming from inside.

Ness: look, we don’t need you all here; nothing’s going to happen, just go home.

Half the animals turned around and left. The ones left over were Daisy, Pecan, a black cat named Kiki, Snake and Stu.

Pecan: we’re staying, weather you like it or not!

Ness: just stand back everyone…I…I think Tom’s coming out!

Everyone shuffled backwards as the door to Nookington’s opened up and Tom Nook came striding out into the snow, dragging Crazy Redd by the ear.
He didn’t seem to be noticing the group of animals staring at him as he shoved Redd roughly to the ground.

Nook: now…I don’t want you wagging your tongue, got it? What you’ve seen is none of your business and you’ll get out of here if you know what’s good for you…

Redd angrily got to his feet and growled at Tom, wiping the snow from his fur.

Redd: you can’t do this! Y-you’ll put me out of business, and I have to make some money to support my sister’s litter!

Nook: EEYA HA HA HA!! Do you honestly think I care about you or your sister’s pack of vermin? Now, now, now…Redd, I thought you foxes were smart!

Redd: b-but you can’t sell expensive furniture like that for one hundred bells apiece!! You can’t do that, it’s just not done!

Nook: oh, can’t I? Just watch me, fluffytail. You sell your clutter for over the top prices, don’t you? Why can’t I sell my rare furniture for one hundred bells apiece?

Redd: BECAUSE NOBODY WILL BUY FROM ME ANYMORE, I’LL GO BROKE! It’s a waste of furniture! You could sell that furniture for a good price!

Nook: heh he heh heaaaa…well so what? I want to sell it for that price, and if you go broke, and your sister’s brood starve, then that’s good. That’s about six or seven little Redds who WON’T be running around!

Redd: YOU RACIST B…AAARGH!!

Redd swung his paw and bashed Tom Nook squarely on his nose. Tom’s pointy snout bent like it was made of rubber, yet, he hardly flinched from the blow.

Nook: now I’m getting sick of you, Redd…you’re messing with powers you don’t understand, and if you don’t shut up and keep quiet, you may find yourself getting “hurt” by an accident.

Just then, Tom turned around and noticed everyone staring at him. Ness stared back. This wasn’t the Tom Nook he’d come to know…in fact…there was something very different about him…something wrong.

Nook: what are you all gawking at?

Snake: um…Tom…did you say you were having…rare furniture for one hundred bells apiece??

Nook: yes, I believe I did. Rare furniture you’ve never seen before…all for cheap! Eya ha ha ha ha…

Ness: his laugh…it’s not right!

Fox: (shaking with anger.) that @$$^0L%...that…that @$$^0L%!!

Snake: …Yaaay! May as well be free stuff!

Jonny: that can’t be right…

Just then, Totokeke walked in and sat down on his little box.

K. K.: my onion was made of onion…dum…dum..dum…and he made me cry, awooo! Hey, what’s going down, losers?

Pecan: Tom Nook is selling furniture for one hundred bells apiece!

K.K: hmmm…I never need furniture, I’m a roving soul.

Ness used this distraction to turn to Fox.

Ness: Fox, there is something seriously wrong with Tom Nook. He doesn’t even look that much like Tom! His eyes…and his ears! His ears don’t normally look like that!

Fox: they look like some kind of furry bow to me…except not pointy.

Paula: I’ll try to read his soul… … … … It…I can’t get anything, my brain keeps hitting a sort of split…

Ness: let’s just be on guard. He could be…

Just then, Stu walked over to Tom and handed him one hundred bells.

Stu: I’d like some of this furniture, moo dude.

Kiki: hmmm…I can’t see what’s wrong with paying 100 bells for any sort of furniture! Meeow.

Snake: me too, please. Bunyip.

Tom Nook grinned, revealing a tiny pair of sharp, glinting fangs.

Nook: go right ahead and take it! It’s all yours.

Ness: Fox! Did you see that? His..his teeth!

Just then, Redd jumped in front of Snake and blocked his path.

Redd: NO! The furniture is rigged! Why else would he sell it for that price? Don’t buy it, I’m selling rare furniture for only…2, 500 bells this time, and it’s all good!

Redd didn’t get to peddle his wares any further. There was a sickening “Spludge,” a scream, and before Ness could comprehend what had happened, Redd was lying on the ground, sobbing as the snow around him began to turn a crimson red.
Tom Nook hoisted the shovel over his shoulder and smirked.

Nook: now we really get to see Crazy’s Redd stuff! EYAH HA HA HA HA!!!

Fox cried out in alarm and bounded over to Redd, laying him out flat so he could inspect the wound. There was a piercing silence from all the animals.
Fox slowly looked up at Tom Nook with a look of hatred on his face. Tom stared back at him and flashed his gleaming set of fangs. Fox recoiled in horror this time.

Fox: WUH!! Wh…

Nook: oh my, I’m sorry! Did I somehow manage to hurt your sleazy buddy, fox? I must say, I’m terrible sorry, I only meant to sort him out, that’s all!

Fox lay Redd to one side and stood on his feet, the look of surprise still apparent on his face.

Nook: that’s the terrible thing about this town, there’s no hospital. My, my my…I must say I’m sorry. Muahah…erm. BUT DON’T LET THIS STOP YOUR SHOPPING, GUYS! BUY AWAY! EYA HAH HA HA!!

Snake: …discounts! Yay!

Snake, Stu and Kiki all went into Nookington’s. Tom Nook turned snidely to Ness and Fox.

Nook: well if you’re not buying, then you shouldn’t be here. Take that fluffy piece of trash with you.

Ness watched in disbelief as Tom Nook went back into his shop. Fox was still kneeling over Redd, who was coughing in pain.

Pecan: oh no! I’ve…I’ve never seen Tom Nook hurt anybody before!...This isn’t…good, chipmunk…

Daisy turned to Redd with a look of confusion and pity on her face. She walked over and produced a handkerchief from her skirt, and tried with revulsion to cover the bleeding wound.
Redd weakly raised his head to look at Fox.

Redd: don’t…t-trust Nook…brother…He’s…he’s…

Fox: heal him, Ness!

Ness: I’m sorry, Fox. But in this dimension my PSI powers are significantly weakened. What’s more, my PP usage is doubled. Healing that wound would take about a night considering recharge times…And if Me and Poo both heal, we could have him better by tomorrow. But right now we need to get that bandaged so he doesn’t loose too much blood.

G&W: we need a house!

Jonny: you can’t use my house! It’s too dusty right now…

Pecan: you can use mine. I have first aid in my cupboard, and he can go on my bed. I can always buy new sheets.

Adeline: it takes me a while to paint up a real proper max tomato. And they won't work in this place if I don't paint them perfectly. So I'll try to help, but it will take time.

K. K: yuck, I hate blood. It creeps me out dude…hmm..there’s a song…blloooood, geeeez I hate it cos it’s red and creepy and just creepy…yeah.

Ness suddenly felt a tingling in his hands. He looked up at the jamming K. K. and realized that he’d just gained four PP.

Ness: hey K.K…your voice makes me gain PP?

K.K.: PP? What’s that? If you need to go to the toilet…

Ness: no, uh…I’m a fabulous magician and your voice makes me gain magical ability! I need you to sing for us all night as we heal Redd, can you do that?

K. K: yeah, I could. I’d be happy to jam for you guys.

Paula: cool. Now let’s go, and in the morning we can see what to do about Tom Nook!

Fox and Ness hoisted Redd up onto their shoulders and carried him off through the snow. Just then, it started snowing really, really heavily. How convenient.
___________----------------__________
Next update: What’s up with NOOK!

 

[MewtwoMaster2002]

Wow great update. Was it Dark Matter that took over Tom Nooks body?

 

[PsiFlameMaster]

whoa, those updates were great! who exactly is Kiriva and what is the Chandler's bone/baton? i know there's nothing like that in the EarthBound game, and i don't think they ever met someone like that in this fic.

anyways...

Fox: gee, that’s easy for you to say…hey! I’M NOT WEARING PANTS!!

Ness: you don’t need to.

Fox: oh…I see…

ROTFL!! poor Fox. *snicker* what is up with that
Tom Nook guy? and why did everyone just stand there watching him, instead of doing something? o well. cya!