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Really Bad Super Smash Bros Suggestions

O

Old Slipperyskin

Smash Rookie
Joined
May 13, 2023
Messages
2
Add American cartoon characters from commercials to the game. That owl with the tootsie pops. The pesky rabbit after the lucky charms. Count Chokula. Remove the Nintendo characters.

Include a free copy of the game in every box of General Mills cereal.

Chex Warrior from Chex Quest is a Captain Falcon clone of course.
 
M

Master Hero Sock-on-Rye

Smash Ace
Joined
Feb 9, 2023
Messages
915
Old Slipperyskin said:
Add American cartoon characters from commercials to the game. That owl with the tootsie pops. The pesky rabbit after the lucky charms. Count Chokula. Remove the Nintendo characters.

Include a free copy of the game in every box of General Mills cereal.

Chex Warrior from Chex Quest is a Captain Falcon clone of course.
Click to expand...
With all those changes, just get a smaller developer to make a Smash clone for food commercial mascots instead of getting Nintendo and SSB itself.

Heck, I think there's a Smashboards Creates thread for food mascots around here somewhere.
 
StrangeKitten

StrangeKitten

Smash Lord
Joined
Mar 25, 2020
Messages
1,956
Location
Battle Royal Dome
Add Dex Dogtective from Foodfight to Smash.

...Wait a minute, the Energizer Bunny is in Foodfight. You might think batteries aren't food, but... :ultrob:

Add the Energizer Bunny to Smash. He and ROB power each other up if used together in doubles.
 
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M

Master Hero Sock-on-Rye

Smash Ace
Joined
Feb 9, 2023
Messages
915
StrangeKitten said:
Add Dex Dogtective from Foodfight to Smash.

...Wait a minute, the Energizer Bunny is in Foodfight. You might think batteries aren't food, but... :ultrob:

Add the Energizer Bunny to Smash. He and ROB power each other up if used together in doubles.
Click to expand...
I'd prefer the Energizer Bunny over any of the Foodfight OCs.

Heck, here's a list of mascots that could represent that movie if their brands wanted to:
  • KC Penguin (Kid Cuisine)
  • Mr. Clean
  • Charlie the Tuna (Starkist)
  • Punchy (Hawaiian Punch)
  • Twinkie the Kid
  • Vlasic Stork
  • Mrs. Butterworth
  • Mr. Owl (Tootsie Roll Pop)
  • California Raisins
  • Chester Cheetah*
  • Polar Bears (Coca-Cola)*
  • Count Chocula*
  • Red and Yellow (M&Ms)*
  • Trix Rabbit (Trix)*
  • Sugar Bear (Golden Crisp)*
  • Sonny the Cuckoo (Cocoa Puffs)*
  • Buzz the Bee (Honey Nut Cheerios)*
  • Lucky the Leprechaun (Lucky Charms)*
  • Cap'n Crunch*
*=Scrapped from the final cut of the movie.

Heck, this could coincide with the "free in every General Mills cereal box" suggestion from earlier in this thread, for all we know.
 
StrangeKitten

StrangeKitten

Smash Lord
Joined
Mar 25, 2020
Messages
1,956
Location
Battle Royal Dome
Master Hero Sock-on-Rye said:
I'd prefer the Energizer Bunny over any of the Foodfight OCs.

Heck, here's a list of mascots that could represent that movie if their brands wanted to:
  • KC Penguin (Kid Cuisine)
  • Mr. Clean
  • Charlie the Tuna (Starkist)
  • Punchy (Hawaiian Punch)
  • Twinkie the Kid
  • Vlasic Stork
  • Mrs. Butterworth
  • Mr. Owl (Tootsie Roll Pop)
  • California Raisins
  • Chester Cheetah*
  • Polar Bears (Coca-Cola)*
  • Count Chocula*
  • Red and Yellow (M&Ms)*
  • Trix Rabbit (Trix)*
  • Sugar Bear (Golden Crisp)*
  • Sonny the Cuckoo (Cocoa Puffs)*
  • Buzz the Bee (Honey Nut Cheerios)*
  • Lucky the Leprechaun (Lucky Charms)*
  • Cap'n Crunch*
*=Scrapped from the final cut of the movie.

Heck, this could coincide with the "free in every General Mills cereal box" suggestion from earlier in this thread, for all we know.
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Add every single one of these to the next Smash. And Dex Dogtective. And the Energizer Bunny. These will be the base roster newcomers and DLC. Maybe I'm biased as one of few hardcore Energizer Bunny fans, but since I find him to be the most hype of everyone in this post, he will be first. Dex Dogtective will be the big final DLC character. Almost all of them will use their foods as projectiles, being as tiresome to play against as other projectile-heavy characters.

EB won't have projectiles, but he'll have fast stats like Sonic, so he'll be great at running away. He'll have a weight of 400 and an armored recovery that travels further than all other recoveries combined. He'll be the most broken Smash character by an order of magnitude never before seen in Smash. Brawl Meta Knight and Smash 4 Bayonetta will pale in comparison to the might of the pink bun. Because the directors of the original commercial couldn't stop the bunny. You can't stop the bunny. Hunters couldn't catch him. Vultures couldn't eat him. Ed of Ed's Diaper Service couldn't kill him with an explosive decoy bunny. Ernst Stavro Blofeld couldn't kill him. King Kong couldn't kill him. Darth Vader couldn't kill him. No one can kill the Energizer Bunny, ever. He keeps going and going and going and going. The dev team will never nerf him, and will only make him stronger with the release of each new game.

Mrs. Butterworth will be given a redesign, this time decked out in armor from Fire Emblem. She will have a syrup mechanic similar to Inkling's ink, but also wield a sword of hard butter longer than even Sephiroth's.

Mr. Clean will pretty much be Kazuya, but fast and with high jumps. And he can rapidly drop Magic Erasers under him to help him escape disadvantage. They'll have the trajectory pre-nerf Joker downward gun did.

Polar Bears will be a semiclone of Ice Climbers, but with soda can projectiles that have huge hitboxes, and they will be the character to bring back wobbling. Ice Climbers won't be able to wobble again, but Polar Bears will.

Why am I thinking of the string cheese mascot? Well because I'm thinking of him, we'll add him too. His name is Mr. Strings. He's a semiclone of Min Min. His proportions are a little different and the attacks are the same, but with a string cheese reskin.

This might be the most unhinged post I have ever posted on this site. I have gone too long without sleeping. I am sorry. And hungry.
 
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M

Master Hero Sock-on-Rye

Smash Ace
Joined
Feb 9, 2023
Messages
915
StrangeKitten said:
Add every single one of these to the next Smash. And Dex Dogtective. And the Energizer Bunny. These will be the base roster newcomers and DLC. Maybe I'm biased as one of few hardcore Energizer Bunny fans, but since I find him to be the most hype of everyone in this post, he will be first. Dex Dogtective will be the big final DLC character. Almost all of them will use their foods as projectiles, being as tiresome to play against as other projectile-heavy characters.

EB won't have projectiles, but he'll have fast stats like Sonic, so he'll be great at running away. He'll have a weight of 400 and an armored recovery that travels further than all other recoveries combined. He'll be the most broken Smash character by an order of magnitude never before seen in Smash. Brawl Meta Knight and Smash 4 Bayonetta will pale in comparison to the might of the pink bun. Because the directors of the original commercial couldn't stop the bunny. You can't stop the bunny. Hunters couldn't catch him. Vultures couldn't eat him. Ed of Ed's Diaper Service couldn't kill him with an explosive decoy bunny. Ernst Stavro Blofeld couldn't kill him. King Kong couldn't kill him. Darth Vader couldn't kill him. No one can kill the Energizer Bunny, ever. He keeps going and going and going and going. The dev team will never nerf him, and will only make him stronger with the release of each new game.

Mrs. Butterworth will be given a redesign, this time decked out in armor from Fire Emblem. She will have a syrup mechanic similar to Inkling's ink, but also wield a sword of hard butter longer than even Sephiroth's.

Mr. Clean will pretty much be Kazuya, but fast and with high jumps. And he can rapidly drop Magic Erasers under him to help him escape disadvantage. They'll have the trajectory pre-nerf Joker downward gun did.

Polar Bears will be a semiclone of Ice Climbers, but with soda can projectiles that have huge hitboxes, and they will be the character to bring back wobbling. Ice Climbers won't be able to wobble again, but Polar Bears will.

Why am I thinking of the string cheese mascot? Well because I'm thinking of him, we'll add him too. His name is Mr. Strings. He's a semiclone of Min Min. His proportions are a little different and the attacks are the same, but with a string cheese reskin.

This might be the most unhinged post I have ever posted on this site. I have gone too long without sleeping. I am sorry. And hungry.
Click to expand...
I beg to differ. This is a good kind of unhinged. It's just fun. Why would you apologize for taking this to its natural extreme?
 
HyperSomari64

HyperSomari64

Smash Master
Joined
Apr 10, 2018
Messages
3,606
Location
Lima, Peru
tumblr_inline_poneavElv31qglk3d_1280.jpg


>Step 1: Cut the entirity of Sonic content for the next Smash
>Step 2: Hire Ken Penders to write the story mode, but them 'im that Sonic is cut.
>Step 3: Penders creates a brand new character for Smash: Z'neeq the Heyshgiug (Picture above), with his own lore (his homeworld is called, and i'm not kidding, Suibom) Basically Legally-Distinct pre-Super Genesis Wave Archie Sonic. Oh, and instead of blue, he will be the same color as the Discord icon.
 
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M

Master Hero Sock-on-Rye

Smash Ace
Joined
Feb 9, 2023
Messages
915
HyperSomari64 said:


>Step 1: Cut the entirity of Sonic content for the next Smash
>Step 2: Hire Ken Penders to write the story mode, but them 'im that Sonic is cut.
>Step 3: Penders creates a brand new character for Smash: Z'neeq the Heyshgiug (Picture above), with his own lore (his homeworld is called, and i'm not kidding, Suibom) Basically Legally-Distinct pre-Super Genesis Wave Archie Sonic. Oh, and instead of blue, he will be the same color as the Discord icon.
Click to expand...
You understood the assignment...

Cutting every trace of Sonic in the next game?
Ken Penders writing the story mode? Putting his hands on Mario or Link?
Z'NEEQ THE HEYSHGIUG??? SUIBOM???
Legally-Distinct Sonic with Discord-colored fur?

How would you like your burial? Viking style or alive?
 
HyperSomari64

HyperSomari64

Smash Master
Joined
Apr 10, 2018
Messages
3,606
Location
Lima, Peru
Master Hero Sock-on-Rye said:
You understood the assignment...

Cutting every trace of Sonic in the next game?
Ken Penders writing the story mode? Putting his hands on Mario or Link?
Z'NEEQ THE HEYSHGIUG??? SUIBOM???
Legally-Distinct Sonic with Discord-colored fur?

How would you like your burial? Viking style or alive?
Click to expand...
Hey, don't be mad. I'm just mocking the writer's silly webcomic which included K'nox the Echyd'nya (which is just the character in all but name)
It was that, or bringing back Evil Sonic (Pre-Scourge when he was still blue).
 
M

Master Hero Sock-on-Rye

Smash Ace
Joined
Feb 9, 2023
Messages
915
HyperSomari64 said:
Hey, don't be mad. I'm just mocking the writer's silly webcomic which included K'nox the Echyd'nya (which is just the character in all but name)
It was that, or bringing back Evil Sonic (Pre-Scourge when he was still blue).
Click to expand...
I'm not mad. Just completely exasperated. And I know how dumb Ken Penders really is, which makes your bad suggestions even worse.

If anything, I'm mainly speaking from the outside looking in on just how bad that would be. I'm not that much of a Sonic fan, which is a phrase that's as liable to get a death threat as...anything else from the fandom, really.
 
HyperSomari64

HyperSomari64

Smash Master
Joined
Apr 10, 2018
Messages
3,606
Location
Lima, Peru
Master Hero Sock-on-Rye said:
I'm not mad. Just completely exasperated. And I know how dumb Ken Penders really is, which makes your bad suggestions even worse.

If anything, I'm mainly speaking from the outside looking in on just how bad that would be. I'm not that much of a Sonic fan, which is a phrase that's as liable to get a death threat as...anything else from the fandom, really.
Click to expand...
So, you want something bad but not way more bad?


Blonic as an alt costume for Sonic.
 
Oracle Link

Oracle Link

Smash Master
Joined
Oct 9, 2020
Messages
3,819
Location
Germany
Cutting All classic version of link (Toon / Young and any green capped ones) but keeping Classic Zelda, Ganondorf and Sheik!
Ive seen so many rosters make this crucial mistake!

Adding a character from the newset game markiplier Played!
FazDude said:
Blinky from Pac-Man gets into Smash with Clyde as a skin, but there’s a 50% chance their names are swapped on every individual copy of the game. This can’t be undone.
Click to expand...
Wouldnt all 4 ghosts be alts? also instead It should be only clyde gets into the game but his name swaps between Clyde, and the other 2 classic names!
 
HyperSomari64

HyperSomari64

Smash Master
Joined
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Messages
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Location
Lima, Peru
1. Make Oogtar from the Super Mario World cartoon an Assist Trophy, and all He does is crying for help.
2. Make the cutscenes animated in Adobe Flash, with an art style similar to Smash Taunts.
3. Hire the two guys who wrote the Mega Man Brazilian comic to write the plot of the Adventure mode.
4. Every one now talks in radical 90s slangs. Except Sonic.
5. Shadow is now playable, but every time he does something, he says Damn.
 
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HyperSomari64

HyperSomari64

Smash Master
Joined
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Messages
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Location
Lima, Peru
The story mode cutscenes are done on Go!Animate/Vyond, and the main villain is defeated with a fully reformed, good Master Hand saying that he's grounded for a zillion years, and must pass a punishment day, with 1000000 punishments.
 
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BritishGuy54

BritishGuy54

Smash Ace
Joined
Dec 14, 2020
Messages
778
Oracle Link said:
I would say unfair (fan) Rosters each time i see one of these:
View attachment 390278
With Pokemon and MArio getting too much im losing 5 years of my life!
I mean why would you cut toon link but add riolu?
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Hey, at least Zelda manages to keep characters. So many fan rosters end up only having Marth for Fire Emblem, and flat out forget Xenoblade exists or think it’s third party when it isn’t.

Anyhow, here’s some really bad suggestions:
  1. Completely ditch inactive series. No more Mother, Star Fox, and other kinds of content.
  2. The only new fighters are clones. Sorry guys, but Mr. L and Metal Sonic take priority over… what? Unique fighters?
  3. Add Goku. He was the real winner of the Smash Ballot, but Sora was the only realisable one at the time. Oh, and since it’s only clones, he’s a Ryu clone. That’s all, folks!
 
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HyperSomari64

HyperSomari64

Smash Master
Joined
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Messages
3,606
Location
Lima, Peru
I got one: If Nintendo returns to unionized works for their English dubs, better have an A or B list celebrity as the new announcer.
 
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