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LOL PETA urges Ben & Jerry's to use actual human milk

GreenKirby

GreenKirby

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Ahhh PETA. You never ceased to surprise everyone.

WATERBURY, Vt. -- People for the Ethical Treatment of Animals sent a letter to Ben Cohen and Jerry Greenfield, cofounders of Ben & Jerry's Homemade Inc., urging them to replace cow's milk they use in their ice cream products with human breast milk, according to a statement recently released by a PETA spokeswoman.

"PETA's request comes in the wake of news reports that a Swiss restaurant owner will begin purchasing breast milk from nursing mothers and substituting breast milk for 75 percent of the cow's milk in the food he serves," the statement says.

PETA officials say a move to human breast milk would lessen the suffering of dairy cows and their babies on factory farms and benefit human health.

"The fact that human adults consume huge quantities of dairy products made from milk that was meant for a baby cow just doesn't make sense," says PETA Executive Vice President Tracy Reiman. "Everyone knows that 'the breast is best,' so Ben & Jerry's could do consumers and cows a big favor by making the switch to breast milk."

"We applaud PETA's novel approach to bringing attention to an issue, but we believe a mother's milk is best used for her child," said a spokesperson for Ben and Jerry's.
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Xsyven

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And how!
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Please don't get into the habit of copying and pasting news stories with a witty one liner. =/
 
slave1

slave1

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come on sucker lick my battery
there are reasons why people do not use breast milk for food, except for babies. breast mild can easily spread diseases. Processing thousands of breast milk bottles would be outrageously expensive and i do not think to many woman want to be hooked up on a machine. cows really don't have that high of an intelligence. they also get fed anyways.

and i do not think breast milk would make it taste as good too.

Peta people are idiots

Please ben and jerry dont do it!
 
Xsyven

Xsyven

And how!
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GreenKirby said:
Why not? :O
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If you want to post a news thread, post the link/quote/whatever, and actually put some well-thought input in on the subject. =/

Simply copying and pasting without actually saying anything is pretty much spam. =/
 
GoldShadow

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Reason #21412 why I hate PETA.

Breast milk? Seriously? Human breast milk?

At least this isn't as bad as that ad campaign comparing the Holocaust to the slaughter of chickens. That was way out of line. This breast milk thing is just laughable.
 
Mini Mic

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Peta makes me think if the song 'Disgustipated' by Tool:

"And the angel of the lord came unto me. snatching me up from my place of slumber, and took me on
High, and higher still until we moved through the spaces betwixt the air itself. and he brought me into a
Vast farmland of our own midwest. and as we descended, cries of impending doom arose from the
Soil. one thousand, nay, a million voices full of fear. and terror possessed me then. and I begged:
angel of the lord, what are these tortured screams? and the angel said unto me: these are the cries
Of the carrots. the cries of the carrot. you see, reverend maynard, tomorrow is harvest day, and to
Them, it is the holocaust. and I sprang from my slumber drenched in sweat with the tears of one million
Terrified brothers and roared: hear me now, I have seen the light. they have a consciousness! they
Have a life! they have a soul. **** you! let the rabbits wear glasses. save our brothers. can I get an
Amen. can I get a hallelujah. thank you, jesus."
 
Overload

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From what I understand if cows aren't milked after a while it is uncomfortable for them, and I'm sure there is enough milk for their calfs. Who says the ones used for milk all have calfs? Or get milked as much? I'm sure they monitor that stuff.

PETA seems to think everyone should be vegetarians just because they think it is wrong to kill animals for food, which I disagree with. I think the main issue is the way in which they are killed, not the fact we are eating them.
 
Rici

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Daddy's milk is saltier than mommy's milk...
 
M@v

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Look at the bright side guys! There will be many more jobs for people, making breast milk for Ben and Jerry's on human breast milk farms. The economy will prosper!

:dizzy:
 
Spire

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hemightbegiant said:
Absolutely hilarious.

Heh, I posted this link to a PETA sponsored comic, "YOUR DADDY KILLS ANIMALS!," let me see if I can find it again.

EDIT: Here it is.
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If fish were so smart and had long-lasting memories, surely they would pass on the, "don't go for the dangling worm, it's a trick!" information to their pals, now wouldn't they?

The only reason any of the PETA members are alive is because of the "survival of the fittest" phenomenon. Homo Sapiens topped all of their great ape cousins ages and ages ago because we were the fittest, and ever since then, we've been hunters. Hunting and killing other animals is merely a form of recycling chemicals to stay alive.

God, I hate PETA so much.
 
Zook

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This thread finally gives me an excuse to post this:

The Onion said:
Heroic PETA Commandos Kill 49, Save Rabbit

NORFOLK, VA—In what has been dubbed the most "devastating and brutal siege in the history of animal-rights activism," an elite, paramilitary squad of commandos from People For The Ethical Treatment Of Animals (PETA) attacked and killed 49 employees at Couture Cosmetics' Norfolk, VA, research facility while saving a rabbit during a daring midnight raid Monday.

"Never in my life, not even during my tour of duty in Korea, have I seen such carnage," tearstruck Couture CEO Herman Frankel said, surveying the carnage. "My God, what will I tell the families of the victims of this massacre?"

According to the handful of survivors of the raid, Couture workers were first immobilized by gunshot wounds to the knees before being shot execution-style in the back of the head. PETA officials assured that no animals were harmed during the destruction of the complex.

The rabbit, a floppy-eared, speckled gray longhair with an adorable pink nose, was being used by Couture as part of an eyeshadow-allergy research project at the time of the rescue.

"Look at the cute bunny," said PETA commando Shirley "No Mercy" Dorn, a Norfolk-area petcare volunteer and leader of the PETA strike force. Lovingly cradling the rescued rabbit as she walked past the charred and dismembered bodies of its captors, she added, "Look at his nose! Look at his nose!"

In addition to the 49 executed, some 150 other animal researchers were savagely beaten. "They're lucky they escaped with their lives," PETA field marshall Donna "Skull" Saunders said. "Those who survived with only severed limbs got off too easily. They were probably putting itchy-powder in Flopsy's big, beautiful eyes."

Adressing the rabbit, Saunders continued: "Who's got a little powder-puff tail? Who? Who? Oh, yes, you do! Oh, yes, you have a furry little puffy-tail!"

She then fed the rabbit a carrot, causing its adorable pink nose to wiggle up and down, up and down as it chewed, making cute little chewy-faces.

In a statement released Tuesday, Couture Cosmetics maintained that, though the rabbit in question was being used for research purposes, the company has adhered to a strict "cruelty-free" policy since 1992, and that the rabbit was "at no time subjected to any pain or discomfort."

"That old line? Don't try handing us that," Saunders said in response. "Those filthy barbarians probably were sticking Mr. Bunny with needles and all sorts of things. They were human garbage who got exactly what they deserved: swift, merciless extermination at the hands of trained professionals." Turning her attention to the rabbit, she added, "Didn't they? Didn't they?"

In addition to liberating the rabbit, PETA commandos seized an office-cubicle plaque with a picture of a panda bear and the words, "I Hate Mondays."

"Look at Mr. Panda-Tummy," PETA operative Warren "Death's Head" Pleth said, holding the plaque. "Look at Mr. Fatty-Fat Panda Man."

An attempt by the families of the Couture Cosmetics victims to bury their loved ones was met with equally savage resistance from PETA commandos, who strafed the mass funeral procession with machine-gun fire before spraying the cemetery with explosive flaming phosphorous gel, scattering the assembled mourners and killing seven.

"The holes they were digging in the ground threatened to disturb the habitat of a native population of moles," an official PETA statement read, "Moley moley, mole mole. Are you a little digger? Oh, yes, you are!"

On Tuesday, PETA officials supervised the rabbit's release back into the wild where, within minutes, it was chased down, torn to pieces and fully devoured by a fox.

Despite the extreme cruelty of the fox attack, PETA officials have no plans to take action against the animal. "Foxes are lovable furry forest friends," PETA president Joy MacInnis said. "Not like the hairless, human, animal-hating scum who so richly deserve to get their skulls smashed in with the back end of an automatic weapon."
Click to expand...
 
Darkslash

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Zook said:
This thread finally gives me an excuse to post this:

Originally Posted by The Onion
Heroic PETA Commandos Kill 49, Save Rabbit

NORFOLK, VA—In what has been dubbed the most "devastating and brutal siege in the history of animal-rights activism," an elite, paramilitary squad of commandos from People For The Ethical Treatment Of Animals (PETA) attacked and killed 49 employees at Couture Cosmetics' Norfolk, VA, research facility while saving a rabbit during a daring midnight raid Monday.

"Never in my life, not even during my tour of duty in Korea, have I seen such carnage," tearstruck Couture CEO Herman Frankel said, surveying the carnage. "My God, what will I tell the families of the victims of this massacre?"

According to the handful of survivors of the raid, Couture workers were first immobilized by gunshot wounds to the knees before being shot execution-style in the back of the head. PETA officials assured that no animals were harmed during the destruction of the complex.

The rabbit, a floppy-eared, speckled gray longhair with an adorable pink nose, was being used by Couture as part of an eyeshadow-allergy research project at the time of the rescue.

"Look at the cute bunny," said PETA commando Shirley "No Mercy" Dorn, a Norfolk-area petcare volunteer and leader of the PETA strike force. Lovingly cradling the rescued rabbit as she walked past the charred and dismembered bodies of its captors, she added, "Look at his nose! Look at his nose!"

In addition to the 49 executed, some 150 other animal researchers were savagely beaten. "They're lucky they escaped with their lives," PETA field marshall Donna "Skull" Saunders said. "Those who survived with only severed limbs got off too easily. They were probably putting itchy-powder in Flopsy's big, beautiful eyes."

Adressing the rabbit, Saunders continued: "Who's got a little powder-puff tail? Who? Who? Oh, yes, you do! Oh, yes, you have a furry little puffy-tail!"

She then fed the rabbit a carrot, causing its adorable pink nose to wiggle up and down, up and down as it chewed, making cute little chewy-faces.

In a statement released Tuesday, Couture Cosmetics maintained that, though the rabbit in question was being used for research purposes, the company has adhered to a strict "cruelty-free" policy since 1992, and that the rabbit was "at no time subjected to any pain or discomfort."

"That old line? Don't try handing us that," Saunders said in response. "Those filthy barbarians probably were sticking Mr. Bunny with needles and all sorts of things. They were human garbage who got exactly what they deserved: swift, merciless extermination at the hands of trained professionals." Turning her attention to the rabbit, she added, "Didn't they? Didn't they?"

In addition to liberating the rabbit, PETA commandos seized an office-cubicle plaque with a picture of a panda bear and the words, "I Hate Mondays."

"Look at Mr. Panda-Tummy," PETA operative Warren "Death's Head" Pleth said, holding the plaque. "Look at Mr. Fatty-Fat Panda Man."

An attempt by the families of the Couture Cosmetics victims to bury their loved ones was met with equally savage resistance from PETA commandos, who strafed the mass funeral procession with machine-gun fire before spraying the cemetery with explosive flaming phosphorous gel, scattering the assembled mourners and killing seven.

"The holes they were digging in the ground threatened to disturb the habitat of a native population of moles," an official PETA statement read, "Moley moley, mole mole. Are you a little digger? Oh, yes, you are!"

On Tuesday, PETA officials supervised the rabbit's release back into the wild where, within minutes, it was chased down, torn to pieces and fully devoured by a fox.

Despite the extreme cruelty of the fox attack, PETA officials have no plans to take action against the animal. "Foxes are lovable furry forest friends," PETA president Joy MacInnis said. "Not like the hairless, human, animal-hating scum who so richly deserve to get their skulls smashed in with the back end of an automatic weapon."
Click to expand...
Click to expand...
The Irony there is tremendous. I wonder who are the barbarians? The People who some how keep the Rabbit population in check OR the people that killed 49 other humans and injured others.
 
A

Aleol

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It was written by a paper called the onion. It really shouldn't be taken that seriously but it does point out many flaws in human nature, and constantly pokes fun at everything
 
Livvers

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Pluvia said:
I don't think I could handle being a Vegan. Also isn't it bad for cows if they aren't milked? I swear I've heard that somewhere.
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Well, the thing is, most cows used for milk are constantly made pregnant so that we can take it all year round. These cows often have hormones put in them, and are bred and genetically changed so that they produce more milk. Being milked as often as these cows are makes for a painful life. On top of that, many of the male cows that milk cows produce are used for veal.

Aside from that, human breast milk is no more disgusting than cow milk. We only think it is because of our culture. I'm pretty sure we are the only mammal in the world that drinks milk its whole life. Most mammals become lactose intolerant at a certain age(which is why you shouldn't give your animals milk to drink).

The reason why PETA would push for human breast milk is because the women have consented to do this. Cows have no choice in the matter, thus human breast milk is more humane.

This applies to a lot of people: Get your facts straight before commenting on a matter like this. Regardless of what people tell themselves or tell you, the meat and dairy industry on an industrial scale is horrible to animals. Regardless, I still eat meat and dairy because I'm an ******* and I want to.

In closing, I do indeed think PETA are bat**** crazy for a lot of other reasons.
 
Barge

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Wow, Peta is just going over the line...How do they know its harmful for cows? What if cows LIKE it?

(Reference to Family Guy, the episode where peter gets a job at the brewery)

And anyways, I agree with the person on the first stage, its bad for cows if they're not milked. (Maybe)

Peta =/= saving animals

They probably have sex with animals to create their own species
 
Mini Mic

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RedPeppers said:
That spelling error was almost as good as the whole PETA thing Tom.
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Don't blame me, blame the guy who wrote the thing I copied it from.

Tom nom nom nom! said:
Mic, he just called you Tom. I officially dont like your new name anymore.
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Yes this is becoming an issue. If I become "Mic and then Tom" then I can be 'Matt', that name has a nice ring to it don't you think?

Livvers said:
The reason why PETA would push for human breast milk is because the women have consented to do this
Click to expand...
Plus it'll create new jobs in the economy :p
 
SkylerOcon

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I doubt anybody would notice the difference.

I wouldn't care. It's all ice cream to me.
 
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