I am soiled, women hate it

[Shorts]

It’s funny, because I admitted to being Bisexual in High School, and I fooled around with a few guys. This seems to erase the fact that I’ve dated many more girls than I have guys, in girl’s minds. They seem to forget that being bisexual is a two way street. I’m down for both genders, yet ever since I’ve told everyone how I really am, no women will admit to liking me, even when I know they do. I’m an attractive guy if I do say so myself, and I know some girls think I’m cute. But they just WILL NOT ENGAGE.

For example, I have a pretty little friend, who I have some history with… in that way. She let me mess around with her prior to ever DATING a boy. Even after I had told her I was Bi, she was okay with it. (In fact, she got more pushy in some respects) But eventually I dated my first guy, and she moved on to another boy as well. Well, three years later, I’m at her party, watching her second relationship crumble, and she’s giving me signals. She’s talking like she used to, and she’s being the girl she once was… but the difference is, she won’t pursue anymore. She feels it, but she won’t go for it. She’s someone I want, I’m someone she wants… but she won’t play.

It’s such a curious thing. Am I not allowed to like both? What is to blame? Is it the tag on the bottom of my foot that reads “Bisexual”? I feel like I have to somehow impress, or beef up my relationships with past girlfriends in order for a girl to even think about talking to me. I’m not really looking for relationship advice. I’m looking for opinions on the matter. And if it means anything, I’m not uber feminine, or anything like that that may be off putting to girls, like I said.. I’ve dated more girls than I have guys. All attractive. PRIOR to telling everyone how I was “Bi”.

What is so off putting about being what I am? Opinions? Anyone?

 

[Pikaville]

I think it might be because they are probably thinking in their head....

"Hmm Shorty is bi, if we were to score now, we might end up going out or something, but then, what if he sees a guy he is attracted to and wants to score him, oh god, the relationship would be over! I don't want that to happen!"

Women do overthink stuff like that sometimes.

 

[Budget Player Cadet_]

Nah, it's kinda a bull**** double standard. If a girl is bi, it means they're mostly straight but into threesomes. A bi guy? "Oh god, he sucks ****, what a ******". It's completely unreasonable, but that's just how it is sometimes.

 

[yani]

"Hmm Shorty is bi, if we were to score now, we might end up going out or something, but then, what if he sees a guy he is attracted to and wants to score him, oh god, the relationship would be over! I don't want that to happen!".

Most likely something related to this. A lot of people tend to fear dating people who are Bi because they believe they're more likely to leave them for the opposite sex/cheat

 

[Pluvia]

Also they could just think you've not fully realised you're gay yet so there's no point.

 

[Pikaville]

But even if that was the case, what crazy ***** wouldn't want to sleep with a cute guy who is into her?

 

[Falconv1.0]

Two things. One, as stated earlier, bull**** double standards.

The other is that a lot of people might actually just not like you.

 

[Shorts]

Also they could just think you've not fully realised you're gay yet so there's no point.

Ewwwwww, I hope they don't think that. I mean, I live on my own, in a mega gay city, why would they think I need to keep up this "charade"? Also, I know I'm bisexual, not unsure about it, for the record.

The other is that a lot of people might actually just not like you.

Like I can't read that people don't like me? If someone hated me, I'm pretty sure I could read that. Even if someone just wasn't into me, I could definitely read that. I'm not eleven. Flirting is flirting.

Most likely something related to this. A lot of people tend to fear dating people who are Bi because they believe they're more likely to leave them for the opposite sex/cheat

That's true, there is always that stigma that bi kids are absolute *****s.

Nah, it's kinda a bull**** double standard. If a girl is bi, it means they're mostly straight but into threesomes. A bi guy? "Oh god, he sucks ****, what a ******". It's completely unreasonable, but that's just how it is sometimes.

It's funny, because girls usually have had ****s in there mouths, yet straight guys are alllllll over them.

 

[Falconv1.0]

Like I can't read that people don't like me? If someone hated me, I'm pretty sure I could read that. Even if someone just wasn't into me, I could definitely read that. I'm not eleven. Flirting is flirting.

Then uh, good luck have fun with the whole being judged cuz you're bi thing.

 

[Teran]

It's because people just assume someone saying they're bi means they're a gay in denial.

In fairness, that is usually the case, lol, people just play things off of the general trend because it's much easier that way.

 

[Shorts]

It's because people just assume someone saying they're bi means they're a gay in denial.

In fairness, that is usually the case, lol, people just play things off of the general trend because it's much easier that way.

I don't think that's usually the case, well, not in my friend group. I think people are just honest when they say that they're attracted to both sexes. Like, I definitely prefer guys, so I lean, but I'm not going to lie about the fact that I am attracted to the opposite sex.

 

[Teran]

I don't think that's usually the case, well, not in my friend group. I think people are just honest when they say that they're attracted to both sexes. Like, I definitely prefer guys, so I lean, but I'm not going to lie about the fact that I am attracted to the opposite sex.

Yeah well your friend group isn't the general population so that doesn't change anything about what I said. :x

 

[Melomaniacal]

Yeah well your friend group isn't the general population so that doesn't change anything about what I said. :x

Well, what do you base your statement off of?
I assumed your group of friends/social encounters, but I could be wrong.

And don't go google it now and copy/paste me the results, I can do that just as well, haha.

 

[Shorts]

Yeah well your friend group isn't the general population so that doesn't change anything about what I said. :x

Thats not my point though, you sounded like you were DOUBTING bisexuality, and it's not like what you said can be proven or disproven anyhow.

All you've saod is strictly from personal experience anyways, how is your personal experience trump mine? Just different.

 

[Teran]

Well, what do you base your statement off of?
I assumed your group of friends/social encounters, but I could be wrong.

And don't go google it now and copy/paste me the results, I can do that just as well, haha.

Google is wrong about everything because all the answers are from Yahoo.

Anyway, "my encounters" are somewhat extensive because I spent the large majority of the past 6 years whoring out.

Needless to say even if I haven't necessarily screwed every boy I talked to I definitely interacted with a damn lot and a large majority of them who initially said they were bi did actually end up saying bah I'm gay. There are obviously people who have been legit bisexual, but a lot of them were initially just saying they were bi to avoid the stigma of the gay label.

Also, it are truth because it is generally reported as part of the coming out phase, often people will resent the idea of being gay and will try as hard as possible to push the idea to themselves that they like women because OMG PLEASE I HAVE TO LIKE WOMEN I DON'T WANT TO BE GAY.

I am Teran and when it comes to homos I know it all don't even question it.

Edit: Lol @ you thinking I was doubting bisexuality when I said USUALLY which pretty obviously means not always.

Also my experience is more valid than yours because I have been victimising boys since I started growing pubic hairs.

 

[Toruk Makto]

In my opinion Bi people are really just gay, but then again I also think that being gay is just a psychological choice.

 

[Teran]

^^^^^LOOOOL the username killed me that is amazing.

 

[Shorts]

Edit: Lol @ you thinking I was doubting bisexuality when I said USUALLY which pretty obviously means not always.

Also my experience is more valid than yours because I have been victimising boys since I started growing pubic hairs.

I think the fact that you even said usually says you have some doubts, but that doesn't really matter anyways.

I don't think you're much more expeirenced than I am. I started before I hit my double digits.

 

[Teran]

So has everyone usually not with boys though.

That doesn't actually equate to experience in people's assumptions as well as the general coming out process. I find this ironic considering you're coming in here all like I DON'T KNOW I DON'T GET IT WHY IS SHE ACTING LIKE THIS ETC ETC

and then I'm like cos she assumes ___

and you're all like nah man you don't know what makes you know more than me

so ultimately why the **** are you even asking go ****ing talk to your shrink if you don't want someone to offer you any sort of insight into the questions you have here.

 

[Falconv1.0]

I think the fact that you even said usually says you have some doubts, but that doesn't really matter anyways.

This might be one of the most...I don't...but...

It's as if the words hit your eyes and your brain just ****s out a response to something completely different.

 

[Teran]

This is why I am so good at dark and moody music, because I can vent all my OMG WTFs into an instrument and make it convincing

 

[Pluvia]

Teran is right, it doesn't matter if you disagree with him, the majority of people think you're just a closeted gay. It doesn't matter if you've done thing with girls previously either, a lot of gay guys have.

 

[Teran]

Yeah Pluvia remembers the unsatisfactory straight sex and how much of a waste of time it was.

 

[Dre89]

Shorty if you lean towards guys more anyway does it really matter you're getting less attention from girls?

Some people don't get attention from either sex.

I only seem to get attention from guys, which is annoying because I'm straight. Well at least I have options if I ever jump the fence.....

 

[Shorts]

But we were discussing the validity of your statement about bisexuals usually just being gay? It didn't really pertain to why she thinks what she thinks anymore, it's a seperate topic. Your bundling the two discussions together and saying I'm being stupid, when I took your comment, and moved to a different subject. Your kind of bundling the two conovs together when they're seperate ones.

I DON'T KNOW I DON'T GET IT WHY IS SHE ACTING LIKE THIS ETC ETC

It's because people just assume someone saying they're bi means they're a gay in denial.

Your answer to my innitial topic. Which I definitely agree with.

In fairness, that is usually the case, lol, people just play things off of the general trend because it's much easier that way.

Where the topic changed gears. Me not agreeing with this statement had nothing to do with the original subject.

Shorty if you lean towards guys more anyway does it really matter you're getting less attention from girls?

Well mostly, it's just this specific girl who I actually have taken a liking to, otherwise I truely wouldn't care if girls didn't actively hit on me, or whatever.

Teran is right, it doesn't matter if you disagree with him, the majority of people think you're just a closeted gay. It doesn't matter if you've done thing with girls previously either, a lot of gay guys have.

I don't disagree with the statement that most people think Bis are closted gays, I disagree with thinking MOST BI people are just closeted gays.

 

[Conviction]

Shortie, in all honesty, you'll just have to make yourself more open to that gender your going after (maybe my advice isn't the best since I'm straight buttttttt). If they can't accept you for what you are no matter what you are into they aren't worth the time anyways. They're shallow.

In others I'm looking at it as being into the same sex is like another interest, like music. If a girl/guy won't date you because of the music you are into, it's pretty shallow, I'm applying the same to thing if the person that is "interested" in you can't accept that you run the ball back and forth, you know?

Well that's all I got on the topic homie. If you want any other opinions or the such just hit my VMs.

 

[Pluvia]

Unfortunately. It was an experience though I wouldn't change it, and hey at least I can answer when people go "Well you've never done anything with a girl so how can you be sure".

Edit:

Oh man I got super ninja'd I need to stop getting distracted.

 

[Teran]

But we were discussing the validity of your statement about bisexuals usually just being gay?

No the statement was homosexuals in denial would take the soft approach of identifying as bisexual to avoid THE STIGMA OF BEING LABELLED AS GAY.

That is what I said from the beginning, it is not that bisexuals don't exist, it is that a lot of gay guys call themselves bi, and a lot eventually just come to terms and call themselves gay. Because of this most people assume bis are just gay but in denial.

It didn't really pertain to why she thinks what she thinks anymore, it's a seperate topic. Your bundling the two discussions together and saying I'm being stupid, when I took your comment, and moved to a different subject. Your kind of bundling the two conovs together when they're seperate ones.

What is so off putting about being what I am? Opinions? Anyone?

No I don't think so looks like I just answered that question and you got kinda salty at the answer for some reason.

Your answer to my innitial topic. Which I definitely agree with.



Where the topic changed gears. Me not agreeing with this statement had nothing to do with the original subject.

It has everything to do with the original subject, it has to do with why people ****ing believe this. It's like stereotypes, sure it's not like they're universal truths, but let's face it they exist for a reason. It's the same here, the belief is borne of a general trend of gays coming out the soft way as bi then going to gay later when they've made peace with it or some ****.

I don't disagree with the statement that most people think Bis are closted gays, I disagree with thinking MOST BI people are just closeted gays.

But nobody is saying that OMG OMG OMG OMG *lip bite*

Very obviously said that a lot of GAY PEOPLE come out as bi because they DO NOT LIKE BEING LABELLED AS GAY AND DO NOT WANT TO IDENTIFY AS GAY

I put it caps because I want to make sure you actually read it since repeating it several times hasn't really achieved much.

 

[Falconv1.0]

I don't disagree with the statement that most people think Bis are closted gays, I disagree with thinking MOST BI people are just closeted gays.

I am honestly questioning if you are even attempting to read what the **** Teran is even saying. Seriously what the **** how many ****ing times does he need to ****ing repeat it Jesus H Christ man.

 

[Teran]

I need to start smoking again.

 

[Shorts]

You win. I don't really care enough to even continue

 

[Pluvia]

Don't look at it like that. There's no winning or losing, just the fact that regardless of what you think or know or agree with, the world doesn't care and it's not fair.

By being bi you're most likely going to get stick from both sides and as hard as you try to convince them people will still believe what they want to.

 

[Melomaniacal]

Google is wrong about everything because all the answers are from Yahoo.

Anyway, "my encounters" are somewhat extensive because I spent the large majority of the past 6 years whoring out.

Needless to say even if I haven't necessarily screwed every boy I talked to I definitely interacted with a damn lot and a large majority of them who initially said they were bi did actually end up saying bah I'm gay. There are obviously people who have been legit bisexual, but a lot of them were initially just saying they were bi to avoid the stigma of the gay label.

Also, it are truth because it is generally reported as part of the coming out phase, often people will resent the idea of being gay and will try as hard as possible to push the idea to themselves that they like women because OMG PLEASE I HAVE TO LIKE WOMEN I DON'T WANT TO BE GAY.

I am Teran and when it comes to homos I know it all don't even question it.

Edit: Lol @ you thinking I was doubting bisexuality when I said USUALLY which pretty obviously means not always.

Also my experience is more valid than yours because I have been victimising boys since I started growing pubic hairs.

How I'm reading this conversation so far:
"Your point is invalid, you're only using your group of friends as a sample, and that doesn't count."
"What are you doing?"
"The exact same thing, I'm just way better than you in every way, and I know, like, SOOOO MANY PEOPLE OMG, so my sample is much better. Also one time I read this thing that says what I'm saying."

I'm not even necessarily disagreeing with you're saying, I just thought this was goofy.

And google is fine if you know how to use it properly.

 

[Teran]

How I'm reading this conversation so far:
"Your point is invalid, you're only using your group of friends as a sample, and that doesn't count."
"What are you doing?"
"The exact same thing, I'm just way better than you in every way, and I know, like, SOOOO MANY PEOPLE OMG, so my sample is much better. Also one time I read this thing that says what I'm saying."

I'm not even necessarily disagreeing with you're saying, I just thought this was goofy.

And google is fine if you know how to use it properly.

No I'm not using just my "group of friends", there is a massive gay community out there that obviously does not fall into my group of friends, since none of my irl friends save for my first boyfriend (who no longer lives in England) are actually gay.

Edit: No Google isn't fine the internet isn't really fine, quite frankly it is filled to the brim with contradictory studies and opinions.

 

[Melomaniacal]

No I'm not using just my "group of friends", there is a massive gay community out there that obviously does not fall into my group of friends, since none of my irl friends save for my first boyfriend (who no longer lives in England) are actually gay.

Edit: No Google isn't fine the internet isn't really fine, quite frankly it is filled to the brim with contradictory studies and opinions.

Right, and you use your encounters with the community in your area.

Of course, because the world is filled with contradictory studies and opinions. Obviously you're going to find different studies that support different opinions. The point is knowing how to differentiate between legitimate research and internet BS.

 

[Zook]

(sigh) you know guys, if y'all knew just how simple it actually is to attract women(not to mention get laid) I think y'all would have more fulfilling lives both in and out of bed instead of *****ing and whining about how supposedly hard it is to meet women and get some. All this negativity is exactly why I left SWF for so long and during my abscence I learned the secrets of the Alpha Male and I'm proud of the life I'm living now. Oh yes lemme tell you all about that. During the last few months I have accomplished the following:

Got a few girls phone numbers.

Can easily walk to a girl and strike up a conversation with her.

I have "wingmen" on my side.

I am so much more confident in myself and I no longer give 2 stinkin ****s about anything. I'm just focused on living a fun and fulfilling life.

Had my first kiss and first girlfriend.

More of an optimist these days as opposed to some pessimist like I was in the distant past.

Have motivations, dreams, and ambitions and it's not all about girls. i.e I plan to become a mangaka when I'm older.

You see? Unlike some of you sad pathetic nerds out there who whine like little kids, I actually go out and do things as opposed to just sitting back and letting life pass me by.

 

[Holder of the Heel]

Shortie, in all honesty, you'll just have to make yourself more open to that gender your going after (maybe my advice isn't the best since I'm straight buttttttt). If they can't accept you for what you are no matter what you are into they aren't worth the time anyways. They're shallow.

In others I'm looking at it as being into the same sex is like another interest, like music. If a girl/guy won't date you because of the music you are into, it's pretty shallow, I'm applying the same to thing if the person that is "interested" in you can't accept that you run the ball back and forth, you know?

Well that's all I got on the topic homie. If you want any other opinions or the such just hit my VMs.

The smartest post in here that actually sees the truth in the matter is up above. Just don't care, I mean, it'd be shallow to care about shallow people, and I'm assuming you aren't shallow or at least not wanting to be as such, so therefore, just don't give a bisexual ****. Hope things go well.

Have motivations, dreams, and ambitions and it's not all about girls. i.e I plan to become a mangaka when I'm older.

After reading Bakuman, I feel the same exact way, we can join teams in Japan and become the number one mangaka in Shonen Jump. XD And what you say about females is sadly true for a large amount of fish in the sea. Girls break out all the time they like me, although I'm not even very attractive and not to mention I'm the least socially capable people I know (and 75% of them are not *****s).

 

[Teran]

Right, and you use your encounters with the community in your area.

Of course, because the world is filled with contradictory studies and opinions. Obviously you're going to find different studies that support different opinions. The point is knowing how to differentiate between legitimate research and internet BS.

My sample area being an entire country not to mention interaction with plenty of gay/bi people from all corners of the world (and reading articles woohoo).

The funny thing is how you ask for some kind of proof, then you're like "but don't go looking up proof and linking it!".

Honestly, people on the internet get a hard on for saying stuff like LINK ME TO A STUDY to sound smart. It's funny because irl people rarely ask that outside of university because it is always assumed people don't just pull these things out of thin air.

How does my experience trump his?

He's the one asking the question and doesn't have the answer, I do, and my answer is right (you know it is), people just mad because I'm not all like Dr. Sploogestain PhD Queerology from Harvard discovered this in his study zomg

Too many things that are observed, known, and understood aren't documented in peer reviewed research format because it is ****ing obvious common knowledge that doesn't need research.

There is something better than Google known as a library which is generally where I do my reading and studying if I really have to because I'm old fashioned that way.

 

[Melomaniacal]

My sample area being an entire country not to mention interaction with plenty of gay/bi people from all corners of the world (and reading articles woohoo).

The funny thing is how you ask for some kind of proof, then you're like "but don't go looking up proof and linking it!".

Honestly, people on the internet get a hard on for saying stuff like LINK ME TO A STUDY to sound smart. It's funny because irl people rarely ask that outside of university because it is always assumed people don't just pull these things out of thin air.

How does my experience trump his?

He's the one asking the question and doesn't have the answer, I do, and my answer is right (you know it is), people just mad because I'm not all like Dr. Sploogestain PhD Queerology from Harvard discovered this in his study zomg

Too many things that are observed, known, and understood aren't documented in peer reviewed research format because it is ****ing obvious common knowledge that doesn't need research.

There is something better than Google known as a library which is generally where I do my reading and studying if I really have to because I'm old fashioned that way.

Haha, oh boy.

If you know every bisexual man in your country (is that really what you're trying to imply?), then alright, you have the authority to make a statement like that.

The whole reason I told you not to google it was because I suspected that your statement was made on the exact same grounds as his, and I didn't want you to spew out some freshly googled **** after I called you out on it. But it's really not that big of a deal. I don't know **** about you, it just looked awfully hypocritical to me.

Again, I'm not actually looking for some article or anything, I don't even disagree with what you're saying (I don't know enough about the topic to agree or disagree, really).

Do your experiences trump his? I have absolutely no idea, that's kinda my point.

Not sure why you're so confident you are correct. Again, I'm not one to talk, I just honestly don't know why it is that you think you're so much more qualified to make a sweeping generalization of a population. Unless you are actually familiar with every bisexual in your country. That would be something.

Not sure where that came from, but yes, I would agree that libraries are better in most ways (or did you think I've never heard of one?). Though there are online libraries and good, scholarly databases. Man, those sure are convenient.

 

[Teran]

Haha, oh boy.

If you know every bisexual man in your country (is that really what you're trying to imply?), then alright, you have the authority to make a statement like that.

I think the delicious irony of all of this is that the people I am talking about are GAY people. Of course since you also seem insistent on not reading my posts, this is becoming a bit difficult to spell out, I'm not even going to bother repeating myself.

The thing is, I don't base things off of people I know/met/interacted with, I've read some articles and had a few chats with certain LGBT counsellors as a young teen and unfortunately they are not linkable sources, I can't really mention them without someone pulling out the obvious YOU COULD BE MAKING ALL THIS UP card.

Really I posted something to help someone out, I wouldn't post with the intention of HELPING someone with the sole intention of talking **** and trying to look smart with things I made up, that is like, the dumbest thing one could ever do.

The whole reason I told you not to google it was because I suspected that your statement was made on the exact same grounds as his, and I didn't want you to spew out some freshly googled **** after I called you out on it. But it's really not that big of a deal. I don't know **** about you, it just looked awfully hypocritical to me.

Well it's not hypocritical because my personal experience and general knowledge in such matters is A GREAT DEAL MORE than most people my age never mind someone younger. My enormous amount of resentment at being gay as a youngster pushed me to research a great deal about the whole subject (in an effort to possibly purge myself of it), so you're right not only do you not know anything about me, all you're doing by bringing this up is trying bring out a contradiction that really isn't there. He said "his circle of friends", which I assume is just a circle of people he knows and is close to. That is a far cry from at least hundreds of gay/bi guys.

Again, I'm not actually looking for some article or anything, I don't even disagree with what you're saying (I don't know enough about the topic to agree or disagree, really).

Well then you should stop.

Do your experiences trump his? I have absolutely no idea, that's kinda my point.

Well then stop talking.

Not sure why you're so confident you are correct.

Because when I know something I know it, I am always right when I open my mouth it's a pretty simple policy. If I don't know about something I keep quiet.

Again, I'm not one to talk, I just honestly don't know why it is that you think you're so much more qualified to make a sweeping generalization of a population. Unless you are actually familiar with every bisexual in your country. That would be something.

Okay maybe I will clarify. My comment wasn't AT ALL about bisexuals. It was about homosexuals who dislike the gay label, be it in terms of self identification or just not wanting the stigma that the general population attaches to it. Because of this trend of HOMOSEXUALS CLAIMING BISEXUALITY and then deciding to make peace and identify as gay, many people just assume that a person out as bi is just homosexual in denial.

Not sure where that came from, but yes, I would agree that libraries are better in most ways (or did you think I've never heard of one?). Though there are online libraries and good, scholarly databases. Man, those sure are convenient.

I assume that Americans have never heard of libraries because I believe in offensive generalisations about everyone like all black people are stupid smelly criminals, all Jews are greedy, all asians are poorly endowed, and that lesbians are just ugly girls who can't get a guy. Any more questions?