Girls/Guys/Relationships

[Azua]

Pff, I drink hot tea on a summer day.

What'chu talkin' bout Willis?

 

[MattDel]

I would say that an important aspect to have in a relationship is general compatibility. When you speak with your other, do you choose your words so as to not offend / insult / creep them out? If so, then you're either just starting out, or not very compatible. It's important to be yourself, be your complete self.

good point here... i definitely agree with this

and im tired of similes and metaphors... onomatopoeias are the way to go

 

[Violet]

I lul'd at Eors.

But anyway, I agree in that it takes a balance and stuff regarding the control and development of a relationship.

By the way, I utterly hate how men have to be 100% masculine all the time, according to general stigma . It's just meh.

 

[KoreanDJ111]

To Proud Smash Scrub:

That anger towards women will only bite you in the a$$ in the long run. If you hope that a woman will magically appear and be all head and toes over you with that kind of attitude, you are in for a hell of a disappointment.

Remember this:

If you like women, you will be liked by women.

Everyone gets rejected by girls at some point. We all "fail" at some point.
But do successful people whine and ***** about it and use them as an excuse to let out your angry emotions, only to stir up even more angry emotions?
**** no.
Instead, learn from your mistakes. Take responsibility for your life, stop acting like a victim, and shape up your life to the fullest.


Being yourself doesn't work. Being your BEST self does.

 

[Rx-]

I am refusing to brag about my GF in this thread!

jk I love to brag.

She's hot and she plays Marth and Peach, and she takes Me and QDVS to tournaments all the time. And she's mega hot. And she plays smash. And she's hot too.

 

[Jammer]

Heh, I'm pretty sure you're the first one to brag about their girlfriend here, Rx-. Just so you know.

 

[MattDel]

Heh, I'm pretty sure you're the first one to brag about their girlfriend here, Rx-. Just so you know.

yea pretty much

 

[♡ⓛⓞⓥⓔ♡]

But strangely, loads of girls in my year were dating much older guys at that age. I still don't understand that to this day..

It's still happening even as I post this crap on the boards...

Just an opinion but I think it's because girls of that age are not very mature and dating with older guys "racks up" their status...(or then it's something "real"... )

*Then the ugly young adults come and snatch them*

 

[Azua]

Just to throw this out there, I'm attracted to older men.

 

[tmw_redcell]

Your DBZ references have moved me oh great redcell!

Is your E-book available in E-hardcover?

It is acutally only avaialbe in e-hardcover, e-softcover doesn't come out for another eight or so months usually. The publishing industry is weird. There's also going to be a video-audiobook coming out where I read it in a soothing soprano while wearing naught but an eyepatch.

 

[Azua]

If there's rum involved, I had a dream like that the other night...

 

[tmw_redcell]

There was rum involved in the recording sessions. I didn't drink much (since I need to be sober to articulate my intense vocabulary) but I did have a barrel of it dumped over me at the beginning of the third chapter. It has thematic significance, but it was mostly because the girl doing the lighting wanted it.

Perhaps you weren't dreaming, but watching me through a telescope? I get that a lot.

 

[Eor]

Just to throw it out before, I was kidding about religion. I'm an atheist and think KAFLOR is an idiot. I was trying to see how far I could go with him still agreeing with me.

 

[Blackadder]

^^^
Oh.
You had me pretty scared for a while there Eor!

*Wipes sweat of brow*

 

[Volrec]

Sorry to go offtopic but

VIOLET, AREN'T YOU THAT SPRITER FROM SZF

 

[Azua]

Dude we're totally off topic.

But I think it should stay that way now.

 

[GameFreaking]

dude women are so objects. i wish they listened to me like theyre supposed to.

 

[Dr.Saturn]

Warning!! Important Question!

Ok, What if the girl you are trying to date practices a totally different religion than yourself? I mean, I like her, but her parents and her are strong atheist. Grr....it's frustrating because I know because of this that our relationship is going to go down the commode....

I find in less you really care about the whole religion thing then you shouold care its really how you feel about it.

As for me my family could use some more religion I don't really even care what it is *shrugs*

And i find caring about religions just being very picky.

So yeah its fine!

 

[Jammer]

dude women are so objects. i wish they listened to me like theyre supposed to.

This is why the other thread got closed. Normally I wouldn't respond to something like this, but I just wanted everyone to know that this is unacceptable and not even funny.

Don't do it.

Thank you.

 

[UMBC Super Smasher]

I've read up to post 120 just now, and I'd like to throw some food for thought out there for the, what seems to be, many Christians in this discussion:

The best advice on girls/guys/relationships is found in the Bible. There are tons of books written specifically on love, dating, and marriage from a biblical perspective. If you're looking for help, that's the best place to look. It might be too difficult to plunge right into the Bible, but if a guy guides you through things in an aesthetically pleasing format with big bullets and 24 point font, it becomes much more bearable.

I will point out, however, that the Christian divorce rate is equal to or higher to everyone else. I think this is really sad, and reflects very poorly on Christians. I believe that if the Christian couple does their homework and does things biblically (things like staying equally yoked) that they can get through any problems in their marriage. It will still be hard; I hear my parents argue about stuff all the time (they're 65 and 61 lol), but staying together is the right thing to do--especially when kids get involved.

Personally, I haven't dated or been in any sort of girlfriend/boyfriend relationship in my entire life, and I'm nineteen. I have girl friends that I hang out with and socialize with, but that's it. I don't see the purpose of formal dating at this point in my life (also I don't have a car, hehe). I am definitely thinking about marriage and the steps I must take to prepare for it (I have to get the girl first), especially since the last of my three older siblings got married last month. I think a girlfriend would mainly be a distraction right now, and I don't see anything particularly good coming out of it (I could see something bad happening, like pre-marital sex). Certainly I really want a girlfriend and I really want to have sex, but I have to hold back and have patience. I need to obtain financial independence before I can support someone else.

^^ that's a little bit of a rant, but I felt like getting it out there.

 

[commonyoshi]

The Bible has terrible advice to get girls.

Otherwise, my love-life would be a much greater success. unless it's because I'm ugly, of couse.

 

[TheOfficialSonicFanboy]

The Bible has awesome advice. It says to find someone like you not someone that is going to whine for the rest of the relationship because you are different. It may be dated but the principles and actions are still true. Just don't go after women like objects because it's not acceptable, and you'll be okay.
Seriously, if there are any women reading this tell me if you feel the same way: People are all people. Humans are humans. Men and women think differently, but internally we still have all the functions that make us human. It's not hard to communicate with the opposite sex other then your hormones bouncing off everywhere when you are a young teenager. When you mature you grow out of it and women are easier and more fun to talk to with your hormones everywhere. It's just a get out of your shell enviroment.

 

[Azua]

This is why the other thread got closed. Normally I wouldn't respond to something like this, but I just wanted everyone to know that this is unacceptable and not even funny.

Don't do it.

Thank you.

Somebody's sarcasm radar is broked

 

[GameFreaking]

no no he's right. women aren't objects. they are people like me. I shouldn't be so unacceptable and not funny.

I should think of what I can do to help this topic thrive.

I am a disgrace.

 

[Pluvia's other account]

We so need a Religion topic. I looked through the first few pages in search, but never found one that wasn't locked.

 

[Jammer]

Somebody's sarcasm radar is broked

I know it was sarcasm. I know it was a joke. But it's still not allowed, and it's how the other relationship thread got closed. I'm not trying to be overly protective of this thread--I just don't want it to be ruined by people who are just being funny and don't know better.

UMBC Super Smasher said some interesting things about the Bible and dating. He said that he has never had a girlfriend because he doesn't see much good coming from it, especially premarital sex. Just so you know, Super Smasher, I've had many girlfriends, but I've never had sex. It really isn't that hard to resist. A lot of good does come from having a girlfriend.

The Bible, as far as I can tell, has nothing against dating. You may find it difficult to get married if you've never had any experience with relationships.

I suggest dating someone from your church. It's not like it's anything serious, right? It doesn't have to be.

And about the divorce rate for Christians being just as high as for other people: At my church, we have about 30 couples. They have been married for an average of about 20 years (they're pretty old). There has only been a single divorce, about 30 years ago. That particular couple got back together just 4 years ago.

I'm not sure, but I think the Bible says the only reason for divorce is infidelity. But even that has happened many times at our church, and the couple has stayed together. So a typical (high) divorce rate is not a universal thing.

 

[S.P.I.C. TOM]

To Proud Smash Scrub:

That anger towards women will only bite you in the a$$ in the long run. If you hope that a woman will magically appear and be all head and toes over you with that kind of attitude, you are in for a hell of a disappointment.

Remember this:

If you like women, you will be liked by women.

Everyone gets rejected by girls at some point. We all "fail" at some point.
But do successful people whine and ***** about it and use them as an excuse to let out your angry emotions, only to stir up even more angry emotions?
**** no.
Instead, learn from your mistakes. Take responsibility for your life, stop acting like a victim, and shape up your life to the fullest.


Being yourself doesn't work. Being your BEST self does.

This ***** is right about women want to know why because I taught his *** **** this ***** got so many *****es it's crazy. To be serious you shouldn't wry so much about women/men put alittle of effort but not to much and always have a back-up.

 

[shadenexus18]

Women aren't objects


To all the guys in this topic who think they know women... please stop. you are hurting the world and any normal guys chance of ever getting laid again.(that includes me)

So true......so very very true. But even though it's true to the highest degree, it's still quite sad that this is the average man's objective in there relationship. I am no exception to this.....sort of. My sinful nature tries to allow temptation of sex to get the better of me, but I haven't succumbed to it seeing how that I'm finanically unable to take care of a wife and a couple of kiddies.

 

[KoreanDJ111]

The point is not to treat women like objects. The point is to be a MAN.

Being a wussy serves no purpose at all in life.

The more of a wuss you are, the more disrespect you'll get from everyone.


People will walk all over you, and will manipulate you or find ways for you to be their "servant".

Not everyone is like that, but there are some people that will want to make you lose to make them win.

If you don't want to believe that, then you are sticking your head in the sand.

Ironically, even your own family manipulates you to some degree. I don't care how Christian/Jewish/Aetheist your family is.

My family is very Christian, but at times they manipulate me to do things I don't want to do.


This is off topic, but I feel this may be useful to some people:
Here is just a quick tip if you want to end any quarrels with your family.

The best reaction is NO REACTION.

"You are in a lot of trouble!"

Don't respond with
"WHAT?! WHY!!! I DIDNT DO ANYTHING WRONG! WHY ARE YOU ACCUSING ME?! WHY DO YOU HATE ME SO MUCH?! DO YOU EVEN LOVE ME?!"

Respond with
"Ok."

That's it.

I have been growing up with a father that had a severe brain injury, and he cannot control his temper the way a normal man would.

He would say stuff like
"You are less than a son of a *****!"
"I wish I had a different son than you!"
"Get the **** out of my house!"
"You are the biggest disgrace in my life!"
"Why did I marry your mom?"

But I kept my cool, and I didn't let it get to me. If I did, I would have ran away from home a long time ago.

I didn't let it affect me, and I showed no emotional response. My father had no power over me because he couldn't manipulate my feelings or actions with his words.

It was because of that that my father recovered faster than normal.

I'm not saying this to get your pity. People who need pity are pathetic and are victims who never get things done.That is why you never accomplish anything by ranting.

If you really want to improve your relationships not just your family, but with people in general, do not show any response. Keep your cool, and just stick your ground.

They will treat you with more respect, give you more responsibilities, and will ultimately build a healthy, mature relationship with your family. You are not a kid anymore.

Onwards.

On being a MAN instead of a WUSSY...

In both aspects of life:

The Bible tells you to be a MAN.
That God made women for men. That we should be the leaders in the household and in everything in life, and through Him, He specifically made us men be MEN, not acting like WOMEN. That is NOT what God wants and designed us for. He wants us to take responsibility for our actions, and to harbor positive, mature emotions so you can set an example to your family/community. "What you reap is what you sow."

On the other spectrum:

Evolutionary psychology says that we men are genetically wired to be naturally leading and dominant, just how women are genetically wired to be submissive and nurturing.
We cannot rewire our hard-wired brains that were developed millions of years ago in just a few years.
We humans cannot surpass the laws of nature.

I believe if you break this cycle of nature, you might see some instant gratification. But in the long run, you will not feel the same emotional fulfillment as you would if you kept this cycle.
50% of marriages end up in divorce. The numbers are getting higher and higher each year.

There is a great confusion in our society today...

People are confused with the Women's Rights movement.
Women want equal rights. I support that.
But what is happening is that women and men are starting to be the SAME.
They are starting to become merged into one gender.
That is not what was originally supposed to happen, nor what women DEEP DOWN want.
There has to be a male/female social dynamic in order for a TRUE fulfilling relationship.

Yin and Yang.

If you guys are really into genetics and evolution, go read The Red Queen or Sperm Wars.

 

[UMBC Super Smasher]

UMBC Super Smasher said some interesting things about the Bible and dating. He said that he has never had a girlfriend because he doesn't see much good coming from it, especially premarital sex. Just so you know, Super Smasher, I've had many girlfriends, but I've never had sex. It really isn't that hard to resist. A lot of good does come from having a girlfriend.

The Bible, as far as I can tell, has nothing against dating. You may find it difficult to get married if you've never had any experience with relationships.

I suggest dating someone from your church. It's not like it's anything serious, right? It doesn't have to be.

And about the divorce rate for Christians being just as high as for other people: At my church, we have about 30 couples. They have been married for an average of about 20 years (they're pretty old). There has only been a single divorce, about 30 years ago. That particular couple got back together just 4 years ago.

I'm not sure, but I think the Bible says the only reason for divorce is infidelity. But even that has happened many times at our church, and the couple has stayed together. So a typical (high) divorce rate is not a universal thing.

What good comes from having a girlfriend, at least in your experience? I'm not saying you're wrong or that no good comes out of it, I just would like you to elaborate a bit more.

In order to get married, I must have a relationship with a girl. It's very likely that I will not marry the first girl I get into a relationship with, and it is unlikely that I will meet Ms. Right on the first try, no matter how much I think we're destined to be together. I don't understand how a formal dating relationship will help prepare me for marriage at nineteen years of age. I'm not ready for a relationship, and I don't see how dating can be non-serious. What's the point if it isn't serious? My viewpoint is that if I don't feel ready to date, I shouldn't.

Your church may be the exception, and the fact that most of your couples stay together is highly commendable. As a whole ,however, it still doesn't change the overall fact that Christians divorce at least as much as non-Christians.

 

[Blackadder]

The point is not to treat women like objects. The point is to be a MAN.

Being a wussy serves no purpose at all in life.

The more of a wuss you are, the more disrespect you'll get from everyone.


People will walk all over you, and will manipulate you or find ways for you to be their "servant".

Not everyone is like that, but there are some people that will want to make you lose to make them win.

If you don't want to believe that, then you are sticking your head in the sand.

Ironically, even your own family manipulates you to some degree. I don't care how Christian/Jewish/Aetheist your family is.

My family is very Christian, but at times they manipulate me to do things I don't want to do.


This is off topic, but I feel this may be useful to some people:
Here is just a quick tip if you want to end any quarrels with your family.

The best reaction is NO REACTION.

"You are in a lot of trouble!"

Don't respond with
"WHAT?! WHY!!! I DIDNT DO ANYTHING WRONG! WHY ARE YOU ACCUSING ME?! WHY DO YOU HATE ME SO MUCH?! DO YOU EVEN LOVE ME?!"

Respond with
"Ok."

That's it.

I have been growing up with a father that had a severe brain injury, and he cannot control his temper the way a normal man would.

He would say stuff like
"You are less than a son of a *****!"
"I wish I had a different son than you!"
"Get the **** out of my house!"
"You are the biggest disgrace in my life!"
"Why did I marry your mom?"

But I kept my cool, and I didn't let it get to me. If I did, I would have ran away from home a long time ago.

I didn't let it affect me, and I showed no emotional response. My father had no power over me because he couldn't manipulate my feelings or actions with his words.

It was because of that that my father recovered faster than normal.

I'm not saying this to get your pity. People who need pity are pathetic and are victims who never get things done.That is why you never accomplish anything by ranting.

If you really want to improve your relationships not just your family, but with people in general, do not show any response. Keep your cool, and just stick your ground.

They will treat you with more respect, give you more responsibilities, and will ultimately build a healthy, mature relationship with your family. You are not a kid anymore.

Onwards.

On being a MAN instead of a WUSSY...

In both aspects of life:

The Bible tells you to be a MAN.
That God made women for men. That we should be the leaders in the household and in everything in life, and through Him, He specifically made us men be MEN, not acting like WOMEN. That is NOT what God wants and designed us for. He wants us to take responsibility for our actions, and to harbor positive, mature emotions so you can set an example to your family/community. "What you reap is what you sow."

On the other spectrum:

Evolutionary psychology says that we men are genetically wired to be naturally leading and dominant, just how women are genetically wired to be submissive and nurturing.
We cannot rewire our hard-wired brains that were developed millions of years ago in just a few years.
We humans cannot surpass the laws of nature.

I believe if you break this cycle of nature, you might see some instant gratification. But in the long run, you will not feel the same emotional fulfillment as you would if you kept this cycle.
50% of marriages end up in divorce. The numbers are getting higher and higher each year.

There is a great confusion in our society today...

People are confused with the Women's Rights movement.
Women want equal rights. I support that.
But what is happening is that women and men are starting to be the SAME.
They are starting to become merged into one gender.
That is not what was originally supposed to happen, nor what women DEEP DOWN want.
There has to be a male/female social dynamic in order for a TRUE fulfilling relationship.

Yin and Yang.

If you guys are really into genetics and evolution, go read The Red Queen or Sperm Wars.

While the general vibe of that is sane enough (Seriously, compared to Joshisrade...) there are one of two things that I would go against there.

One:
"People who need pity are pathetic and are victims who never get things done."

...*Cough*
No need to hide emotions under a veil of "OMG I IS A MAN" if you ask me.
I just think that statement there is a little overly "Manly". Sure, pity isn't the best of things, but I wouldn't say getting it from someone is the end of the world.

Two:
This one is highly subjective to my own opinions, but I find most of what the bible says isn't all that trustworthy. The bible was written by a host of people that had very little idea about much things, so they made up little stories and things to explain life and whatnot. I'm honestly just saying I wouldn’t trust the bible on whatever the hell is says on being a man. If I recall, there's crap about "And woman will be subjective to man".

...yeaaaaah. That part had female input, obviously.

Other than that, I can't see much the bad about what you said. We had people saying "****ING TAKE DAT BIATCH" for real in the last thread.

I'm still going with Azua on her large post a page or two back as the "best" one. Oddly, from a woman.

Not trying to flame here.

 

[Livvers]

Well, higher divorce rates could be due to a lot of things. It was less socially acceptable to get divorced years and years ago, so people were more likely to work through their problems.

Also, women had lower paying jobs, less jobs available, and less support in general than they do today, so it was more difficult for them to get divorced and live on their own(especially when there were children involved). Hell, my mom was forced to quit her job when she found out she was pregnant with my oldest brother(it was either she get an abortion, or they'd fire her). Today it is much easier for women to live on their own and to have good paying jobs, so they are less likely to stick by a man that makes them unhappy.

So, there's a lot more to divorce rates than what you say.

I agree with Black Adder that Azua had the best post.

 

[Jammer]

What good comes from having a girlfriend, at least in your experience? I'm not saying you're wrong or that no good comes out of it, I just would like you to elaborate a bit more.

I don't understand how a formal dating relationship will help prepare me for marriage at nineteen years of age. I'm not ready for a relationship, and I don't see how dating can be non-serious. What's the point if it isn't serious? My viewpoint is that if I don't feel ready to date, I shouldn't.

Well, I guess I'd say that girlfriends to me are mostly good friends that you can kiss. Actually, that's not exactly true. There is a real difference between a person who is your friend and one whom you are intimate with. It doesn't have to be sex, of course. It can even be just holding hands. It's hard to explain, really. Maybe someone else could do a better job?

Also, I kind of touched upon that with my first post in this thread, I believe.

At the age of 19, I'd say you're ready to date, whether or not you feel like you are. I understand how you're thinking there's no point if the relationship isn't serious. I guess that's a bit like saying there's no point in going to school if it's not college. You learn things in school that will help you in college. And going to school has its own rewards.

I'm not saying that if you don't date, there's something wrong with you. But I don't think there's really any reason not to. Of course, it's all up to you.

You're 19. To me, that's old. You could get married in as little as a few years, but I would guess you'll wait until you're around 30, if you ever do get married. Good luck, though.

 

[KoreanDJ111]

"People who need pity are pathetic and are victims who never get things done."

...*Cough*
No need to hide emotions under a veil of "OMG I IS A MAN" if you ask me.
I just think that statement there is a little overly "Manly". Sure, pity isn't the best of things, but I wouldn't say getting it from someone is the end of the world.

The reason why pity is not good in the first place is because it can be an addiction.

The point here is not to try to mask your insecurity with a social mask of pretending to be a man.

The point here is to be productive with your life and move on. Taking responsibility in your life because no one else will. Taking out that emotional needle out of your arm.

If you don't take that emotional needle out of your arm, you will only be filling in more and more negative things into your life.

Remember the Law of Attraction: you get what you think about; your thoughts determine your experience.


Jerks and Wussies have the same inner game: They are both insecure.

But they handle it in different ways.

Wussies go in the corner and cry or ***** and complain, or just take it in the ***.

Jerks are very aggressive and take it out on people physically just to prove they have power, but it's all to hide their insecurity.

But I believe there is a man that is higher than the spectrum of a jerk and a wussy. A REAL MAN takes responsibility for their actions. They make no excuses. They do what they want to do in life and go for it. They emotionally stay calm. They are givers, and don't expect anything back.


Being a victim in life robs you of your power in life. Accepting everything as it is gives you power.

You gotta do something with your life. No one is going to do it for you.

This isn't for everyone. Some people just aren't willing to take responsibility for their lives and want to make excuses for every wrongdoing and have absolutely no power in their lives to make a difference, and they just wander in their lives like ghosts.

That is ultimately their choice in life, and that's the way they want to live.

But for those who actually want to succeed in their life and get the results they want, they don't make themselves victims and look for pity. Instead, they focus on being proactive,have emotional control down, not being affected by outside events, being validated internally rather than externally, having a passion in life, and going through life without apology. They are the ones that actually gets things DONE.

 

[Volrec]

So, how did this debate get started?

 

[Blackadder]

It's SWF Volrec, man.
You know this place well, and you should know crap get's started here by what can only be greater forces of stupidity than anything else on this Earth.

 

[BigRick]

Wow DJ took this thread back with force!

I'll let him speak for me... to a certain extent hehe

lol I'm probably not being a man right now, but I'm lazy for that kind of stuff

 

[Violet]

Sorry to go offtopic but

VIOLET, AREN'T YOU THAT SPRITER FROM SZF

! Noticed! Yes, I was from that board . Though it was more pixel art than sprites, that was another dude who I was associated with.

But bah, off topic response >.<. Watch this space for an edit once I read the rest of the topic.

On Topic: The Bible is one of the WORST books to get advice for dating. If we just ignore the fact that it's thousands of years old... and there are several cases in which the woman either gets married to their husband's brother, stoned, or ***** because the men of the household were of a higher status -_-. Honestly, if you take the bible literally... just no. Let's just go along with the 'love thy neighbour' and other stuff for now :>.

 

[Jammer]

On Topic: The Bible is one of the WORST books to get advice for dating. If we just ignore the fact that it's thousands of years old... and there are several cases in which the woman either gets married to their husband's brother, stoned, or ***** because the men of the household were of a higher status -_-. Honestly, if you take the bible literally... just no. Let's just go along with the 'love thy neighbour' and other stuff for now :>.

You're right with the marrying the brother thing. But remember that that is found in the Old Testament, not the New Testament. Christians follow the New Testament, which has much more progressive views on marriage.

"An eye for an eye" was the Old Testament. "Turn the other cheek" is the New Testament.

And just because the Bible has stories where people got ***** or stoned doesn't mean it condones it. In fact, ****** and stoning is very, very wrong according to the New Testament.

Remember, lots of bad stuff happened in the Bible that are lessons about what not to do. I think the fact that the Bible tells stories in such an objective tone (just tells the story with no embellishments and no "asides") confuses many people.

 

[Mediocre]

Wow DJ took this thread back with force!

I'll let him speak for me... to a certain extent hehe

lol I'm probably not being a man right now, but I'm lazy for that kind of stuff

He only "took this thread back with force", as you say, by totally ignoring Azua's post.

You notice how he hasn't addressed anything she said at all? Perhaps that's because he can't.