Flakes - Friends After High School

[Ryu Shimazu]

Link to original post: [drupal=3546]Flakes - Friends After High School[/drupal]



Usually I write reviews, and Majora's Mask is next, but I felt the need to write this.

I graduated this year, start college in January, and I've noticed the friend group disappearing already. Out of my high school, I've already noticed only three people will I truly stay in touch with. One of them was to be my best friend. At least once a week we brawled, play Yugioh, saw movies, did everything together. Then after High School it stopped. He just stopped hanging out with me, and said he had grown up. Then every time he said he'd come visit or we'd chill out (working around my small work schedule), he'd always blow me off or hang out with other people. Finally I just told him I'm done with it, and just started hanging out with my other two friends.

Is it wrong to get so much emotional, or upset over that? He started lying to me, being mean to me, ignoring me, putting me off, and just acting like he didn't care anymore? I know this sounds way to emotional I guess, but it really hurt to be honest.

I came to the conclusion it was better to let him go and not care than to care and be hurt because he never wants to chill. (And I'm the one working, lol)

I just wondered if the people on here outside of High School had experienced this, or advice. Maybe I'm just being stupid or something, but it doesn't feel like "Best Friend" material.

 

[Lord Chair]

Cliche though it may sound, it's just life being life. As you move on, you lose people and find new ones to take the roles other people once had in your life. In one's youth, one will find that happening rather more often since his loved ones change, sometimes in other ways than one does himself.

Of course, odds are he's just going through a phase and in due time, your relationship will take on its old shape. You cannot rely on that, the simple advice that is 'move on' is kind of what is to be given here. It's only natural, after all.

 

[Ryu Shimazu]

Yeah, the only problem is he has done this to people before as well. I just wanted to think I was different I guess. I always defended the fact people called him shallow, but now... meh.

 

[Lord Chair]

Another thing about life, people aren't always what they seem to be.

The cliches, they're piling themselves up.

 

[Ryu Shimazu]

Yeah, but a cliche isn't a cliche if it doesn't fit in a lot of scenarios? I'm just an average Joe

 

[Teran]

I guess you didn't choose great friends, because I'm still in contact with all of my close elementary and high school friends.

In any case, you'll find that a lot of people are flakes as they get older. Just relax and deal with it. Your country is massively populated, there are enough people in there for you to find a good friend. Just don't worry about it and keep plugging forward. The more you worry about this situation the more stress you'll put on yourself, and ultimately the more difficult you'll find it to make new friends.

 

[Jam Stunna]

I think everyone goes through this (except Teran apparently ). When I graduated, I thought that I would keep my circle of friends small to increase my chances of contact with them. I wanted to stay friends with five people; seven years later, I'm down to two. It just happens. When you don't have the common experience of school to bind you together, people drift apart.

However, in your case, it sounds like your friend is just a huge jerk. He thinks he's an adult and he's outgrown "kid stuff," but in reality he's not even close to being mature, and if he was he would treat you with more consideration.

 

[Super_Sonic8677]

7...0___O
w-wow c-c-combo breaker!

 

[Laem]

whaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaat

 

[Apollo$]

You can always get new friends

 

[Today]

Lol Jam!

Anyhow @ OP, Your friend doesn't sound like a true friend. Blowing you off to hang out with "other" people? If he was a friend, why not hang out with you? Either way, it's understandable getting sad losing a friend or growing apart... but people change sometimes, which sounds like what he's going through. He may feel, "I need to hang out with the older crowd," or "the cool kids." Trust me, I've seen friends and people drift out to that. But a true friend, would stick by you no matter what; the whole growing process. I'm sure in college you'll have closer and maturer friends.
I'm in the same boat as you. Everyone just drifted and changed. It's cooler to drive past the speed limit and smoke everyday, no need to hang out with me and play games.
It happens. I got sad, but it's okay! I'm sure I'll meet some fantastic people in college! [':

 

[Ryu Shimazu]

Lol Jam!

Anyhow @ OP, Your friend doesn't sound like a true friend. Blowing you off to hang out with "other" people? If he was a friend, why not hang out with you? Either way, it's understandable getting sad losing a friend or growing apart... but people change sometimes, which sounds like what he's going through. He may feel, "I need to hang out with the older crowd," or "the cool kids." Trust me, I've seen friends and people drift out to that. But a true friend, would stick by you no matter what; the whole growing process. I'm sure in college you'll have closer and maturer friends.
I'm in the same boat as you. Everyone just drifted and changed. It's cooler to drive past the speed limit and smoke everyday, no need to hang out with me and play games.
It happens. I got sad, but it's okay! I'm sure I'll meet some fantastic people in college! [':

Yeah, it's very ironic because he left the land of playing Yugioh and Brawl for Halo (which he always played, but obsesses over now) All he can say is because I like Eastern games more (I guess Nintendo/Sony, heck iunno) we don't have much in common.

Oh well though, what happens happens I guess. Thanks for the advice so far. The only thing I don't get is, everyone needs a hobby, without it you'll slowly go insane. <_< So I don't get how people can define some things kiddy and some things adult.

Also, I'd quote yours too Jam, but I was afraid I'd post 7 times too (J/K)

 

[john!]

wow jam stunna. wow

stuff like this just happens as you grow older, there's not much to say about it. lots of people your age are really immature

 

[Jim Morrison]

I think Jam just closed the topic.

 

[#HBC | Acrostic]

Wait until you cycle through friends on a semester by semester basis. Especially from people you helped in order find the right book store, guided them around campus, and studied for eight hours straight for subjects like Calculus and Chemistry. As long as the friends justify the means, a friendship is completely plausible until the end. Anyone remember the college humor video?

 

[Jam Stunna]

I'm a mod god **** it, I can do whatever I want!


SORRY ALL RIGHT GUYS GEEZ

 

[Lord Chair]

You can't post without censoring yourself, apparently.

 

[AlphaZealot]

Once you enter college most of your friends become people you see like 2-6 times a year. The good ones (not also at your college) maybe a 10-20 times.

I see Smashers from high school far more then I see most of my high school friends.

 

[DarkLouis331]

Your story sounds exactly like mine.

I had a best friend like that in high school, but once college started for him this past year, everything changed. (We go to the same college.) He joined the band fraternity, and blew me off for them every time I tried to invite him over. I hate fraternities. Particularly the one he's in. Nothing but a bunch of arrogant robots in a circle-jerk who can't get over themselves. It's an extension of high school stereotypes. I can find friends just fine without them.

He started insulting me personally, never found anything good to say about me at all, and insulted my college's gaming club, claiming that his fraternity was so much better.

At that point, I just started to ignore him and we haven't talked since. Apparently the 2 other people in our friendship group are still hanging out without me. Makes me angry because we got into a fight with another person before and we decided to work things out with her later on.

Point is, you don't need people like that in your life. The people you talk with will constantly change. Some will stay for a long while. Others won't. I have a new best friend now. I talked with him a little bit in high school but now we hang out quite often. It all works out.

And nothing's wrong with being emotional on some topics. Haters can keep on being robots.

 

[Riddle]

Yeah, you just have to find some new friends

College has plenty of chances to meet people

 

[Purtle]

You'll meet plenty of people in college.

Losing a friend sucks, but life can suck.

 

[Ryu Shimazu]

Your story sounds exactly like mine.

I had a best friend like that in high school, but once college started for him this past year, everything changed. (We go to the same college.) He joined the band fraternity, and blew me off for them every time I tried to invite him over. I hate fraternities. Particularly the one he's in. Nothing but a bunch of arrogant robots in a circle-jerk who can't get over themselves. It's an extension of high school stereotypes. I can find friends just fine without them.

He started insulting me personally, never found anything good to say about me at all, and insulted my college's gaming club, claiming that his fraternity was so much better.

At that point, I just started to ignore him and we haven't talked since. Apparently the 2 other people in our friendship group are still hanging out without me. Makes me angry because we got into a fight with another person before and we decided to work things out with her later on.

Point is, you don't need people like that in your life. The people you talk with will constantly change. Some will stay for a long while. Others won't. I have a new best friend now. I talked with him a little bit in high school but now we hang out quite often. It all works out.

And nothing's wrong with being emotional on some topics. Haters can keep on being robots.

Yep. It does sound similar. He also went all "You don't own PS3/360 so your a baby gamer" on me.

Which sucks because,

A) I'm not exactly rich
B) I have priorities
C) I love old games + Nintendo. Can't help it =/

 

[Jim Morrison]

lol u *** if u dont own a 360 or even a ps3 u dont even no what a real game is.

 

[SuperBowser]

Wow, I've somehow always kept the same friend groups.

I stay in contact with most of my school friends. I've kept the same group of friends since joining university (4th year almost over). We'll likely stay in contact too. Guess I'm lucky.

 

[#HBC | Acrostic]

I found the video: Honest Graduation Song