A Leap of Faith

[rhan]

@Jam/Toon: We can just agree to disagree. The way y'all see age is a way to indicate maturity. But I never see an age. I just see the maturity factor. People that are 21 may be stereotyped as a mature person but in actuality they can be the most immature people on the planet. This can also be vice versa to 18 year olds. They may be seen as immature legal adults but they may exercise the same maturity as a 30 year old man with a career and a family to look after.


The way love and relationships work is not by age but by how mature and how well they understand each other.

 

[Chris Lionheart]

Thats what im saying if you know it will be uneasy all around avoid the whole situation altogether.

Although you seem to have your heart set on this plan my final word on the subject tonight is make sure you actually love her. What i mean by that is really evaluate how you feel and make sure its not just lust. i have been in situations like that and would hate for something like that to happen in this case considering everything at stake.

Lust isn't it at all. I've been acquainted with her for years. Always thought she was quite cute, but never really liked her because I didn't know her very well. It takes a lot more than beauty to charm this beast. It was only after I rather recently (by which I mean early this school year) started really talking to her and becoming her friend instead of just his friend that I really found myself having feelings for her.


When I talk to her or look at her, I don't see this young 15 year old girl or even my best friend's sister. I see a friend. I see someone I care about very strongly and look to for inspiration. I see someone who I can get along with, share many common interests with, and overall just really enjoy the company of and hope to continue enjoying that same or a stronger company for as long as life lets me.


Is it love? Let time and the tidings of life be the test of that. There is no other way to tell.

 

[Mota]

When I talk to her or look at her, I don't see this young 15 year old girl or even my best friend's sister. I see a friend. I see someone I care about very strongly and look to for inspiration. I see someone who I can get along with, share many common interests with, and overall just really enjoy the company of and hope to continue enjoying that same or a stronger company for as long as life lets me..

How would you feel if you were to lose this?

Well it seems you came here, asking for advice for a mind already made up.

In this situation, I wouldn't pursue your best friends sister, it'll not end well.
It's a fragile dilemma and should be dealt with face to face, not by email.

All I can say is good luck.

 

[Chris Lionheart]

How would you feel if you were to lose this?

Well it seems you came here, asking for advice for a mind already made up.

In this situation, I wouldn't pursue your best friends sister, it'll not end well.
It's a fragile dilemma and should be dealt with face to face, not by email.

All I can say is good luck.

What I did over chat and email is a smaller act- one limited to friendship status by mutual agreement. If I ever do try to raise the bar... it's a dilemma I'ld strongly consider dealing with face to face.

And thank you.

 

[SuperBowser]

My younger sister went out with one of my (still) good friends a few years ago. Personally, I didn't care. Maybe I'm more rational. He wasn't a **** and my sister was mature enough to handle herself so I didn't see the need to be involved in her affairs. I kind of knew he wasn't her type though and just stayed out the whole thing until they inevitably broke up. Their lives, their choices.

Of course, everybody is different and you can't expect people to react the way I did. You can hope your friend will be glad that such a good friend and person wants to go out with his sister (because she is going to go out with someone eventually). But the more likely response is what Jam says. Only you can or would know.

If you believe your friend doesn't want you going out with his sister, you are kind of a jerk if you go ahead.

 

[Chris Lionheart]

My younger sister went out with one of my (still) good friends a few years ago. Personally, I didn't care. Maybe I'm more rational. He wasn't a **** and my sister was mature enough to handle herself so I didn't see the need to be involved in her affairs. I kind of knew he wasn't her type though and just stayed out the whole thing until they inevitably broke up. Their lives, their choices.

Of course, everybody is different and you can't expect people to react the way I did. You can hope your friend will be glad that such a good friend and person wants to go out with his sister (because she is going to go out with someone eventually). But the more likely response is what Jam says. Only you can or would know.

If you believe your friend doesn't want you going out with his sister, you are kind of a jerk if you go ahead.

I probably am I bit of a jerk to be honest... but I'm not ignoring my friend's wishes here.... I'm considering them and trying to lessen any displeasure he might have at the idea. Right now, I can't know if he is just protecting her because he's young- in which case, no problem... I'll wait.... or if he just legitimately hates the idea of anyone (or me in particular) going out with her. Though I kind of doubt he has any particular disdain of me given the "wonderful" alternatives that throw themselves at her... every.... single... day....

In the end, I want his blessing should I ever go forward with this..... it does matter to me.



But for now... we're just going to have fun... if anything comes of it we can worry about that... later.

 

[rhan]

You know... I'd rather have a trusted friend date my sister than a corny horndog. :/

 

[Chris Lionheart]

You know... I'd rather have a trusted friend date my sister than a corny horndog. :/

And I'm hoping he'll see that way eventually. She sure has enough horndogs making her miserable.

 

[Hyper_Ridley]

My parents were in the same situation as Chris. My dad started dating his close friend's sister.

They're still happily married to this day, and the only reason my dad doesn't see my uncle much anymore is because they moved, but we all get together on holidays and such.

 

[StealthyGunnar]

Certainly, ask your bro for the "ok." But as for this age gap, it's not TERRIBLE. My cousin's girlfriend is 16 and my cousin is 20.

 

[Chris Lionheart]

So today's the day. Tonight I just want her to have fun and feel comfortable. I'll show her a bit more of myself and pray that she can see and appreciate me for what I am. We will enter the prom as friends, and leave as friends, as I've promised, but perhaps she'll gain a greater image of me. Regardless, I will be happy tonight.

 

[Kris121]

Good luck Bro!

 

[rhan]

Chris is a good guy. Not like the douchebags out there. Hope everythign goes well tonight.

 

[Sephiroths Masamune]

I know this thread is a little old, but I feel the need to respond.

First of all, this all sounds like romantic infatuation rather than love. Not to be rude, but this isn't one of your story books where the guy gets the girl and they live happily ever after. No this is real life, problems arise when you don't suspect them. Something could happen where she does something you don't like.

Also, don't tell me that age doesn't matter, because it does. Just because an 19 year old has the physical make up to withstand alcohol and is mature enough, doesn't mean he/she should drink it. You MIGHT be mature enough, but chances are she's not.

 

[RATED]

Have you considered that maybe I'm not viewing us as a 15 and an 18 year old? I could be viewing us as, as you put it, a 23 and a 20 year old. As far as I see my future, I have college to go to.... classes to take..... books to write..... money to make. Then, if it hasn't already happened and can still happen, what then would you say? Would my patience be lunacy to you? I'm 18 years old and have never been on so much as a date. A few years of waiting is as trivial to me as a day if it means that I will meet my goals in the end.

let me help u.

I recommend u to wait a bit bcuz if you are 18 u are probably going to college or already in college, there's going to be a lot of nice girls there. I am not saying that " get another girl and forget about her" , I am saying u " first look and if there's another girl that might get your interested or makes u feel things" if what I said doesnt happen then u really like the 15 years old girl and do whatever you think is right.

 

[missedwithtruestrike]

yea....15 and 18 is **** where i live...but if its not where you are...id go for that ****. as long as its not a one night deal, id see no probs.