For
's thoughts on the whole cast. I'm trying to use phrases he may say out loud in his codecs, so for the characters that existed in Smash Brawl, I think they're going to be the most accurate.
- It is an honor to be fighting one of the most famous gaming icons.
He doesn't look like a fighter though. His outfit speaks plumber/wedding/builder.
- Wait I don't remember Mario being a doctor?
He has had 100 jobs in his life time? I have so many questions.
- It's the famous plumber's brother. Show him some respect Colonel.
What's gotten into you? Colonel? Cooooloneeeeeeeel!
- If Mario was smart, he would tell her to stop getting kidnapped by that big and heavy turtle.
How does he keep getting his hands on her anyways?
- Is the phrase "Hi I'm Daisy" a secret tool or something?
Why does she keep saying that? It reminds me of La Li Lu Le Lo.
- A third princess that has experience with Mario in one game?
He must get a lot of action in bed.
- What's this lizard thing? Oh, it's the dinosaur that gets abused by Mario all the time.
How about I capture him so we can see what it tastes like Ottacon.
- Looks like a cheap movie monster that's too slow to even catch me.
How does he keep getting his claws on Peach anyways?
- So was Bowser this spoiled as a child too? He does have quite the arsenal though.
All that gear is only useful though if used at the right place and time.
- Isn't it supposed to be Bowser Jr. in that clown kart? This clearly isn't him.
So he has seven brothers that also drive one? Interesting. I hope they don't all tag team me.
- What is this plant thing? Is this even a fighter?
Those teeth look sharp as hell, and his stretchy neck isn't helping.
- He attacks by farting? You must be joking Colonel.
Wait, where is he keeping all these bikes?
- I don't see this fight going much different than Bowser.
Well, besides the fact that he is a King Kong rip off and not a Godzilla rip off.
- There's a chimpanzee wearing a Nintendo hat.
He uses Edible ammunition? Times sure have changed.
- Oh, now it's an actual Godzilla rip off now. I feel well prepared for this now.
Although, how does that crown boomerang properties? It seems illogical.
- Are you sure this is the Hero of Hyrule? He looks different Mei Ling.
Is "Breath of the Wild" part of another proverb or something?
- This one looks more like the Link I know from before.
His weaponry certainly got a downgrade.
- Well, I guess not all Links swing basic gear.
Come to think of it, why is he not one of those "Clone Fighters" or whatever they're called?
- It doesn't feel right to fight a girl in a dress though. Magic? Really?
Oh she's pretty powerful. The rose has thorns.
- Who is this mysterious man? He looks like some epic bad a** ninja.
Could this be that new Link in another maybe? Wait, it's a girl, Colonel?
- This one is giving off a very murderous vibe.
Colonel, do I even stand a chance against this monstrosity?
- A woman wearing a power suit? She looks pretty strong.
Ottacon, what exactly is that thing capable of?
- This new Samus has an extraterrestrial look. It's almost like that's not even her.
Oh, so they're called "Echo Fighters". Got it.
- Wow, Samus took her clothes off.
She's a lot more agile without that bulky power suit.
- Ridley looks smaller here than every description of him ever.
What happened to him Colonel?
- Ottacon. Who is this freak? Is he a mutant or is he into cosplay?
What, angels? Give me a break.
- So did Pit get burnt up or something, Mei Ling? Why are his wings and hair black now?
Evil angels? This is even more confusing.
- Who's the green haired princess, Ottacon? Ottacon, you there?
What, how did she hack into my feed? Who does this girl think she is? Slippy?
- Who's blue haired swords man? He built an army from the ranks of defeated enemies.
Talk about a good strategist.
- Did Marth get a gender swap or something, Mei Ling? She looks almost identical to him.
If she's a distant descendant, then why does she fight identically to Marth still?
- So, another sword fighter, but this time the blade burns.
Is his sword called the "Burning Blade"? Oh he's another Marth clone.
- Alright, this is just ridiculous at this point.
Cloning was a bad idea from the start.
- He's swinging that two handed sword around with just one hand.
It's too unsafe to be near Ike, Colonel.
- This
man/
woman has books with
him/
her? Ottacon, does
he/
she even know where
he/
she is right now?
I would think that the battlefield is generally an unsafe place for book nerds.
- So
he/
she can transform
his/
her body parts into those of a dragon?
He/
She can actually
TIP THE SCALES.
Am I right, Colonel? Come on, man, it's supposed to be a dragon pun.
- Watch out for what, Ottacon? The harmless pink marshmallow? Is it poisonous or something?
Oh, it's got a copy ability? Not my precious gear. No, I refuse to let it eat me.
- Ottacon, who's the penguin? Woah, that hammer is filled to the brim with gadgets too?
I don't think I could even lift that thing, and he's swinging it around like it's nothing.
- Who's the masqueraded sword's man? Meta Knight? Oh no.
Wait, this is Smash Ultimate. He's no longer the God like fighter he once was a few games ago.
- This fox is fast. That blaster shoots fast as well. And I can't hit him from a far because of a reflector?
This fight is going to be long. Wait, Colonel, his name is Fox? Real imaginative name.
- This bird is fighting very much like Fox from earlier. Only difference is he goes for style.
Unfortunately for him, style doesn't win him the battle.
- Wolf? What has naming our children come to these days?
One way or another, this fighter looks pretty vicious. I should be careful.
- What's this yellow thing with the red cheeks, Mei Ling? Is it a Pokémon?
An electric type? Shocking.
- Pikachu looks more like a child now. Evolution? This is not how that works.
Mei Ling, how could Pichu be any cuter than Pikachu anyways? It's still just as deadly.
- Who's the huge eyeball? Wait, no this one looks more like a balloon now that I think about it.
So, this Pokémon puts a lot of energy into sleeping even when on the job? Sounds irresponsible.
- Pokémon Trainer?
He/
She gives the orders behind the Pokémon. Right, Ottacon? Squirtle? What could this little water possibly do to me besides quench my thirst? Ivysaur? Grass is a type on its own? It seems very bigoted towards other types of plants. Charizard? He's huge and he's got a lot of fire power. This could actually be tough.
- Mei Ling, who's the white creature with the long tail? Are you choking?
What's this thing doing to you? Mei Ling? Meeeei Liiiiiiiing!
- What's this purple fire coming out of Lucario's hands? It's his aura?
So he gets stronger when damaged. The cornered rat really can bite the cat.
- I got a frog over here. It's throwing water shurikens at me and vanishing like crazy.
I can't keep up with him. Is "nerf or nothing" some Chinese proverb, Mei Ling?
- Goodness gracious, this fire tiger here is vicious. Wait, it's a Pokémon?
One way or another, it looks good at boxing. It looks like it can take down just about everyone here.
- I'm fighting someone who only exists in two dimensions.
This is making my head hurt so bad, Ottacon. I don't know if I can do this.
- Colonel, I got a boxer over here. No, not a man in boxers, a professional boxer. He's rather short though.
Is he named Little Mac because of how little he is or because of how little distance he can get while recovering?
- Duck Hunt Duo? I see the duck, but where is the dog mentioned in that name?
Does he hunt ducks? If so, why are they working together for any purpose?
- So those two are the Ice Climbers, huh? They barely look threatening, Mei Ling.
Blood Bond? Seems like they would get in each other's way to see who gets to the top first.
- Ottacon, what's this robot I'm fighting? It's named Robot? Really?
Oh, it goes by ROB in America. Fine, ROB it is then.
- The kid doesn't look threatening. Wait, PSI abilities? Defying scientific explanation?
What has this world come to, Colonel?
- More PSI abilities that defy the laws of the universe around us?
This is worse than the angel cosplay boys at this point.
- Hey! That's Captain Falcon. Isn't it? He's an F-Zero pilot. Wait, he's out of his element.
Where did he learn Falcon Punch, Falcon Kick, and the Knee anyways?
- So Villager's tool set includes hitting people with boxing gloves, an axe, an umbrella, a stick, and turnups, launching explosive rockets, growing trees on people, chopping them down, digging people into holes, digging them out of said holes, lighting fireworks on them, shooting a sling shot with perfect precision, dropping a bowling ball on them, throwing a flower pot at them, and more? The name Villager doesn't seem fitting. How about Murderer? Is that not a better name for
him/
her, Colonel?
- Who's the dog? No Mei Ling, there is no duck fighting with her.
So she has similar properties of Villager? Looks accurate.
- Olimar can dig more Pikmin out any time he wants.
Is he ever really that lonely, Mei Ling?
- Ottacon, who's this colorless
girl/
boy? Wii Fit Trainer? What is
she/
he doing in a Smash Game?
Isn't
her/
his role to train the fighters for stuff like this, not actually compete?
- The boy with the lightsaber seems to have stat altering properties.
How can he be so good at everything in one match?
- Seriously?
She/
He attacks with Ink? There's better things to use for ammunition. Oh,
she/
he has to reload it.
Come to think of it, why do I have a seemingly bottomless amount of ammunition?
- Pac-Man? He's even older than Mario.
How is it that Mario got the spot light anyways?
- Wow! He's good with that whip. And he's got a lot of throwing items to use.
No wonder how he has defeated Dracula so many times.
- Richter was such a good character with a unique fighting style.
It sucks that Nintendo wasted opertunity in favor of another f***ing clone.
- It's me. I'm fighting myself. He's got my gear and everything.
It's like I'm looking into a mirror. We're evenly matched in this fight.
- Colonel, there's a muscular man in here, and it's not Little Mac. Ryu? In a Smash Bros game?
He comes from a totally different type of fighting game. He's way out of his element.
- There's just another plain old muscular man, Mei Ling. Sheik, Incinceroar, Little Mac, Captain Falcon, Ryu.
This is beginning to get old. Wait, the sword fighters are more complained about? How many are here again?
- There's a little boy in a power suit. Is this Samus's child or something?
Mega Man has a ton of equipment too. I can relate to him.
- Something about this hedgehog rubs me the wrong way, Ottacon.
I just don't like him, and I can't explain why.
- He's another fighter swinging a two handed sword with one hand.
His Limit Charge seems very powerful. One wrong move means lights out for me.
- Looks like this fighter focused more on visual appeal. Ottacon, what do you think of her? Umbra Witch?
Between this, magic, angels, goddesses, psychic powers, and PSI abilities, I'm getting sick of unscientific stuff.
I know the thread is old, but I have been working on this for five days and didn't want to let the effort be for nothing.
SonicMario
gave me a great idea in the General Thread. What does my boi (
) think of the other fighters on the roster. I got through all of the characters, but it lead me to create this thread.
