This is a really strong start!
Peridot; It's better to thoroughly flesh out as many supporting cast members as possible.
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"He just casts a light sword from his wand fragment."
"He didn't give any explicit details, but since he was after Orion and likely the other Grands, it makes them worry that he might already have someone on the job..."
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"She looks surprised and couldn't dodge or counter it in time,"
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"Would the call be picked up and alert the enemy of the Mewni group's imminent return?"
"Or will it be ignored so they can focus on dealing with Brass and Jenny?"
So their deaths can impact us the most
Zelda:
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-on Blake's shoulder, making her drop her weapon-
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-TRAPPED IN SPRINGTRON'S ARMS-
-all she can do is watch Coyle and Brass fight... which is pretty epic, not gonna lie-
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-it'll be picked up-
-Sebas also got his time to shine, showing that as a creation of the justice-seeking Touch Me, he shows compassion for a terribly beaten up and badly ill prostitute named Tuare who was still willing to live, with the woman falling for him. He also managed to befriend Brain, and a young knight named Climb, serving as some sort of mentor-
-Tuare, however, got kidnapped by the biggest criminal organization in the continent, as she was technically their property, and they wanted to give out a message to any interferers, but Sebas, with some slight assistance of Climb and Brain, managed to save her-
-Ainz also even allowed Tuare to remain in Nazarick despite being human since he quickly noticed she resemblem that one killed adventurer who pretended to be a boy and remembered she mentioned having an older sister, connecting the dots-
-It was also seen the kingdom they're in is currently in some political turmoil of their own, with their princess feigning to be a sweet woman but in reality being a sociopath who is a complete yandere for Climb-
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-And Atalanta can connect the dots on who...-
-Kama proceeded to shoot various arrows, which Orion took for her or reflected-
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-And the da Vincis interfere-
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-It is picked up-
Eleonora: "What.... Needed......?"
So an opposite of the original, sort of.
Aye, me head aches, it does...
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Heh, I don't think any of us do.
"Sunset was approaching and is was even more beautiful."
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Peridot; FEAR PERIDOT THE MIGHTY METAL BENDER REBELLIOUS FROM HOMEWORLD!
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What happened then...?
That's a good sum up
-She simply giggled it off-
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Lusamine: "Wait, we spent this much time out?"
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Altera: "Is that from one of your shows?" -she asked while attacking-
Karna: "Ah, Avatar. I remember Jinako liked it despite being western"
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Paris: "War"
Link: "I'm about to remind you that you're able to die now."
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Viridi: "YES~!" -BEAMU... which is reflected by Pittoo's orbitars-
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-then let's find her-
Drakkon: "Finally, a fight where crushing will be a challenge"
Kimberly:
Oh my God, was I this edgy?! Wait, my costume is still edgy! Though I look damn good.
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Kama: "My, my... Are you not charmed by me?"
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-She flies trying to do so-