Premarital Sex

Matt · Apr 1, 2002

Your parents tell you not to have sex before you're married. Why? Well, most parents don't want their kids to "grow up" too fast but that's another discussion entirely. The main reason nowadays is that there's an alarmingly high chance of getting an STD. Though most are curable if caught at an early stage, the most deadly ones are -not- like HIV.

But with STD's aside, is premarital sex okay? Whether you're married or not, you should take the time to frggin' ask your sex partner first whether or not they have an STD. Anyway, if you were raised believing that it's not okay then... why? Is sex an "adult only" action? What defines "adult only"? Something not suited for kids? Who sets these standards? Why am I asking so many questions?

"Adult only" is slapped on to pornos when they don't want kids to see them. Not to stray too far from the subject but I think that there is no harm in sexuality other than the fear of driving a kid to an unstable preverted/****** lifestyle. Ha, but that's another "people kill people, not guns" type of situation. Sure, some people will always be irresponsible for their actions but does that make it unsafe for everyone else?

No, it doesn't. Premarital sex, in my opinion, is acceptable. However, I'm not comfortable with the idea of 12 year olds screwin' around, that just doesn't settle right. I'd say if two responsible teens make the decision to have sex then no one should stop them.

By the way, I'm talkin' "pleasure sex" and not "baby-makin'" sex, of course. Yeah, and I didn't even use a single smiley... heh.

XDaDePsak · Apr 1, 2002

I was screwin' around since i was 13 <img border="0" title="" alt="[Wink]" src="wink.gif" />
Premarital sex is bad because...uh...what was the question again? anyways, sex is goo 4 j00.

Liquid Entropy · Apr 1, 2002

Disclaimer: I consider sex a totally healthy
experience for non-minors. I do not in any way
encourage sexual relations between non-adults
becausee I consider the young incapable of
redering legitmate consent.

That being said, I continue.

mmmm <smacks lips>

let me put it like this:

I once learned that you burn roughly 100 calories
during sex.

To lose weight, you need to burn 500 calories
per day, minimum.

Consider that a goal.

Gideon · Apr 1, 2002

I guess I will take the religious stand point since no one else is.

God intented sex as a pleasure and luxury... for married people to share. For marriage partners, sex allows them to be emotionally AND pysically united. When teens have sex, its all for the physical aspect, neglecting the emotional aspect of it.

I'm not going to go too much further, but you should be able to tell what stand point I'm coming from. God made it for married people, not kids. Period.

[ April 01, 2002, 10:48 AM: Message edited by: Gideon ]

CaptFalcon · Apr 1, 2002

You're right, Gideon. And besides the religious implications, there are many other things to think about.

1. STDs- There is a higher risk for STDs
2. Money- Babies cost lots of moola. Most teenagers do not have the kind of money needed. Think about it: Diapers, clothes, toys, a crib, and countless other expenses.
3. Emotional Readiness: In my opinion, most teenagers are not ready for the emotional stress that comes with having a baby. Raising a child takes a lot of time and dedication.
4. Teenagers have other things to do besides having kids. A few examples are homework, other school related stuff, hanging out with friends, getting ready for college and such.

And even if you practice "safe" sex, there is still the risk of STDs and criticism from society.

What?3:16 · Apr 1, 2002

Amen to that capt.falcon

Bazooka Lucca · Apr 1, 2002

It's an individual and moral question. I say no, I'm going to wait till I'm married. Plus I don't want to get to that night when my wife has to tell me that there was another guy before me that screwed her. Since I don't want her to have sex with another guy before me, I'm sure she wouldn't want me having sex with someone else either.

PimpLuigi · Apr 1, 2002

So Gid basically youre saying teens aren't capable of reaping gratification emotionally and sexually? Or is it just that teens aren't capable of love? Marriage is just a piece of paper, and over half end in divorce anyway what makes marriage so special?
From a moral perspective only love should be a factor.
From a disease perspective my girl and myself were both test before she got on the pill.
From any other perspective, what makes sex so sacred anyway? Should you inhibit your hormones when you meet this hella hot chick at a party? Do you have to have similar interests and be in love to have sex?
You might as well not kiss before you really know someone and are "in love" w/ them.
Oh and i suppose oral sex counts a well right? :rolleyes:

okay, now is pre-marrital masturbation okay then?

-Pimp

Disclaimer: Despite Pimp's past and imoral nature, Pimp is neither supporting underage sex, oral or otherwise. Pimp says use protection. <img border="0" title="" alt="[Wink]" src="wink.gif" />

[ April 01, 2002, 12:09 PM: Message edited by: PimpLuigi ]

Zelda of Hyrule · Apr 1, 2002

I just accept that it's gonna happen sooner or later. A girl in my class (she's 12) had sex slammed against the school wall with a 16 year old who got her high.

Liquid Entropy · Apr 1, 2002

Well Gideon, moral rectitude is a fine reason
not allow sex, for yourself. It would be wrong
to impose your belief system on others who do
not share it on the basis that you consider yours
more supreme than others might. The path of
one's sexual relations are by and large totally
their option.

And Zelda, that's not sex you described there,
thats ****, statuatory ****. They're alot
different.

And as for the Cap'n:

"You're right, Gideon. And besides the religious implications, there are many other things to think about."
-The magic word is think. Yes, these are things
to consider.

"1. STDs- There is a higher risk for STDs"
-First of all, one's risk to get an STD is
directly dependant on the nature of your sexual
activity. If your having occasionally with girls
you care about and using protection, then your
in much less danger than your simply screwing
everything you can get vertical. The most common
of STD's are a risk you have the perogative to
take, they don't need to be that present a danger
if your are careful.

"2. Money- Babies cost lots of moola. Most teenagers do not have the kind of money needed. Think about it: Diapers, clothes, toys, a crib, and countless other expenses."
-Now, I don't want to debate the validity of
abortion, but I'm just saying that its an option.
If you don't agree, write a letter to the supreme
court and ask them to change their minds about it.
More importantly, the birthcontrol pill is the
smartest thing ever. All girls at all times
should be on the pill. Aside from the obvious
benefits, it greatley lessens the impact of the
menstrual cycle, which is a good idea if I've
ever heard one. In addition to that, condoms
and other birthcontrol is also a good attack.
Avoiding getting a girl pregnant is pretty easy.

"3. Emotional Readiness: In my opinion, most teenagers are not ready for the emotional stress that comes with having a baby. Raising a child takes a lot of time and dedication."
-Haha, actually, I agree. I feel that until one
has become an a legal adult, 18, it is not safe to
say that a person has developed the the needed
cognition skills to safely determine wether or not
they should be having sex. I strongly believe
in statuatory **** laws as a means to deter abuse
pretending to be puppy love.

"4. Teenagers have other things to do besides having kids. A few examples are homework, other school related stuff, hanging out with friends, getting ready for college and such."
-Yah, I gotta agree here too, having kids is a
bad idea. Sex isn't! Kids are, at least while
your a teen. I may never have children, actually,
just as a side note. I think sex is a beautiful
thing which any given adult has the right to
chose when to partake of it, but maybe that's
just me.

"And even if you practice "safe" sex, there is still the risk of STDs and criticism from society."
-Of course there is a present risk. If a sexually
active person takes the appropriate precautionary
steps, its my belief that he can do it. However,
its your right to wrap yourself in a styrofoam
bubble and never try the bacon, steak, and eggs
breakfast, but I'm not sure what kind of life
that is.

[ April 01, 2002, 12:50 PM: Message edited by: Liquid Entropy ]

Flok · Apr 1, 2002

<blockquote>quote:<hr />Originally posted by Zelda of Hyrule:
I just accept that it's gonna happen sooner or later. A girl in my class (she's 12) had sex slammed against the school wall with a 16 year old who got her high.<hr /></blockquote>Hey,that's very casual(or something like that)!Say,are you from Holland?I have heard of this story also on a school where my friend is on,it's the same story,plz reply,maybe i know you

jet · Apr 1, 2002

i'm not do n' it till' i'm married, no matter what

Liquid Entropy · Apr 1, 2002

Do me a favor jet.

Take that sentence, write it down on a piece of
paper, put it somewhere safe, read it again when
your 21, and then tell me what you think of it
then.

Brian S. · Apr 1, 2002

Isn't it illegal to have sex when your like 10-15 years old?

And what about condums? don't they protect people from getting AIDs?

Just asking questions.

Legolas · Apr 1, 2002

<blockquote>quote:<hr />Originally posted by Brian S.:
And what about condums?<hr /></blockquote>OK, ive heard the word 'condums' about a million times, but I don't have a clue what it is. could some one tell me?

ÊtËrÑå£ Ðã®kÑê§§ * · Apr 1, 2002

<blockquote>quote:<hr />Originally posted by PimpLuigi:
Disclaimer: Despite Pimp's past and imoral nature, Pimp is neither supporting underage sex, oral or otherwise. Pimp says use protection. <img border="0" title="" alt="[Wink]" src="wink.gif" /> <hr /></blockquote>LOL LOL that was hilarious
pimp! <img border="0" alt="[Laugh]" title="" src="graemlins/laugh.gif" /> <img border="0" alt="[ROTFL]" title="" src="graemlins/rotfl.gif" /> <img border="0" alt="[Chuckle]" title="" src="graemlins/chuckle.gif" /> :D

anyway, whats honestly wrong wit premarital sex? I mean if you wanta have some fun, and the hot girl beside you wants to have fun, and you got protection (as pimp said, i cant get over how funny that was, lol) then, for god sakes, go have some fun and have sex. ( i know i did <img border="0" alt="[Oh Well]" title="" src="graemlins/ohwell.gif" /> )

"sex is for married couples to express their love, physically and emotionally" - some1 said something along those lines up there....my reply:

"love is the name, sex is the game. forget the name, play the game <img border="0" title="" alt="[Wink]" src="wink.gif" /> " (while your a teen, 16 +, any younger, i think its not right...yeah i know, im being a hipacrit(Sp?))

lol....once again, hilarious pimp, i laffed so hard...

-ED <img border="0" alt="[Devil]" title="" src="graemlins/demon.gif" />

Brian S. · Apr 1, 2002

Condums are Baloon thingies that go over your d*ck and you have sex with it.

XDaDePsak · Apr 1, 2002

Girls? F*ck 'em. Twice.

Shy Guy · Apr 1, 2002

<blockquote>quote:<hr />Legolas: OK, ive heard the word 'condums' about a million times, but I don't have a clue what it is. could some one tell me? <hr /></blockquote>Legolas, if you must know... A condom is something you err.. umm.. That a male uses when having " pleasure sex ". So that dangerous fluids don't enter the male and female bodies.

Premature sex is wrong, in my opinion. The whole point of sex, is to reproduce. But still, teens find it will help them mentally, to have pleasure sex. If this occurs, the two teens run the risk of STDS. Which cannot be cured, and usually cause death. Sex is not something for teens, it's not all fun and games you know.

Gideon · Apr 1, 2002

<blockquote>quote:<hr />Originally posted by PimpLuigi:
So Gid basically youre saying teens aren't capable of reaping gratification emotionally and sexually? Or is it just that teens aren't capable of love? Marriage is just a piece of paper, and over half end in divorce anyway what makes marriage so special?

Basically, yes, teens are what they are... not quite matured... Teens are perfectly capable of being in love, but they aren't mature enough to take on the responsibilities of love. Maybe to you marriage is a piece of paper, but that is society corrupting it for you. What society says marriage is isn't what God intended marriage to be, pimp luigi. Divorce is generally wrong, except under certain circumstances.

 From any other perspective, what makes sex so sacred anyway? Should you inhibit your hormones when you meet this hella hot chick at a party? Do you have to have similar interests and be in love to have sex? 

Sex is sacred because it is a special gift from God for married people to enjoy. Its not just something to do with anyone at any given time. BAzooka made a good point in his post, too.

Oh and i suppose oral sex counts a well right? :rolleyes:

okay, now is pre-marrital masturbation okay then?

yes, oral sex is wrong. some christians argue aobut masturbation...thats a whole other topic. My personal opinion is that its wrong becuase you are not treating your body in a way that pleases Christ. But thats arguable.
<hr /></blockquote>

XDaDePsak · Apr 1, 2002

<blockquote>quote:<hr />Legolas: OK, ive heard the word 'condums' about a million times, but I don't have a clue what it is. could some one tell me?<hr /></blockquote>You can get STD's whether you wear condoms or not.

McFox · Apr 1, 2002

Anything is arguable Gid. And on this forum as you very well know (especially in this room), everything will be argued.

I say no to it too. I've always been taught (here comes the "you only believe what you hear" argument) that it's only something that makes you feel good (here comes the "what's wrong with that" argument) and should only be used in marriage (here comes the "why get married at all" argument).

It can be compared to alcohol (here comes the "what does that have to do with anything" argument). It makes you feel good while it's going on, but later you may regret what you've done (at least I would).

SLaKKiCHu · Apr 1, 2002

<blockquote>quote:<hr />Originally posted by Gideon:
yes, oral sex is wrong. some christians argue aobut masturbation...thats a whole other topic. My personal opinion is that its wrong becuase you are not treating your body in a way that pleases Christ. But thats arguable.
<hr /></blockquote>[/QUOTE]

-sigh- And it doesn't really please me much anymore, either. Maybe I've done it too much or maybe I've had too much of the good stuff.

Anyway.. SLaKK sez(yeah, I'm trying to be like everyone else who doesn't think that people will know they said what they post without stating it clearly): my take on the whole thing is simple. I do not encourage sex between minors. In reality, believe it or not, you -can- wait until you're at least of age. And in general, it's a much safer avenue to walk down.

However.. since no one is likely going to convince you of anything different... at least wear a condom. STDs are not pretty. I'm sure anyone with a health class knows that.

Massy · Apr 1, 2002

<blockquote>quote:<hr />If this occurs, the two teens run the risk of STDS. Which cannot be cured, and usually cause death.<hr /></blockquote>Errr, no. HIV/AIDS is the only incurable STD, and is one of the least common.

[ April 01, 2002, 06:08 PM: Message edited by: Massy ]

RyokoYaksa · Apr 1, 2002

Don't forget herpes simplex... whatever it was. It's also called genital herpes, the other incurable STD to date.

SLaKKiCHu · Apr 1, 2002

There are plenty of incurable STD. Herpes and Genital Warts to name a couple.

Gamer4Fire · Apr 1, 2002

Yes, but herpes is in no way deadly. A major inconvienence, yes, but not deadly.

If that is what they are teaching you younguns, no wonder you are so afraid of everything. Death to religion, the great fearmonger.

PimpLuigi · Apr 1, 2002

what's this i hear? i don't know of any curable std's. the majority won't kill you, but they sure aren't pretty like Slakk said.

Gid: I think you mistook the oral sex thing, i was wondering if it was different than sex, but you interpreted it as "wrong period". Am i to believe you neither intend on having oral sex when you get hitched nor masturbate now? Hmm, pretty personal, i wouldn't want that to end up on X's "watch what you say" list- so don't bother answering if youre not comfortable w/ the question. <img border="0" alt="[Oh Well]" title="" src="graemlins/ohwell.gif" />

Back to the actual debate at hand, there seems to be a bridge between pre-marital sex and underage sex. To clarify sides, assuming everyone is legal, (so we won't be arguing about underage sex as well) is it okay to have sex before marriage?

Is it okay to have sex after a divorce, or do you need to be married at all times?

Is it okay to have sex if youre in love, but not yet married?

And finally, this is a mature debate if you're still on momma's apron strings perhaps you shouldn't be participating in this particular argument.

-Pimp

[ April 01, 2002, 07:47 PM: Message edited by: PimpLuigi ]

Gideon · Apr 1, 2002

<blockquote>quote:<hr />Originally posted by PimpLuigi:


Gid: I think you mistook the oral sex thing, i was wondering if it was different than sex, but you interpreted it as "wrong period". Am i to believe you neither intend on having oral sex when you get hitched nor masturbate now? Hmm, pretty personal, i wouldn't want that to end up on X's "watch what you say" list- so don't bother answering if youre not comfortable w/ the question. <img border="0" alt="[Oh Well]" title="" src="graemlins/ohwell.gif" />
<hr /></blockquote>nah, i never said anything personall. You are inferring things now that I could or could not have implied. All i said were viewpoints... <img border="0" title="" alt="[Wink]" src="wink.gif" />

tha KIRBSTER · Apr 1, 2002

It's Kinda sad some people are pregnant and they are in the 7th Grade

Gideon · Apr 1, 2002

ya, let me ask this. are any of you in agreement with premature sex... Im talking liike 11 year olds here, because I'm beginning to hear a lot more cases of it...

tha KIRBSTER · Apr 1, 2002

<blockquote>quote:<hr />ya, let me ask this. are any of you in agreement with premature sex... Im talking liike 11 year olds here, because I'm beginning to hear a lot more cases of it...
<hr /></blockquote>Nah that kinda to gross but yeah I am hear a Ton of cases on It

Daniel Miller · Apr 1, 2002

<blockquote>quote:<hr />Originally posted by PimpLuigi:
So Gid basically youre saying teens aren't capable of reaping gratification emotionally and sexually? Or is it just that teens aren't capable of love? Marriage is just a piece of paper, and over half end in divorce anyway what makes marriage so special?
From a moral perspective only love should be a factor.
From a disease perspective my girl and myself were both test before she got on the pill.
From any other perspective, what makes sex so sacred anyway? Should you inhibit your hormones when you meet this hella hot chick at a party? Do you have to have similar interests and be in love to have sex?
You might as well not kiss before you really know someone and are "in love" w/ them.
Oh and i suppose oral sex counts a well right? :rolleyes:

okay, now is pre-marrital masturbation okay then?

-Pimp

Disclaimer: Despite Pimp's past and imoral nature, Pimp is neither supporting underage sex, oral or otherwise. Pimp says use protection. <img border="0" title="" alt="[Wink]" src="wink.gif" /> <hr /></blockquote>Firstly, considering that you're a "Pimp", I'm not listening. Secondly, "masturbation" is having sex w/ yorself. Now, personally, I don't want to be gay, but then again, he is Pimp... j/k! <img border="0" alt="[Laugh]" title="" src="graemlins/laugh.gif" />

PorCorpWis · Apr 2, 2002

Why is it that every time I come into a thread, there is so much patheticness... it's sad...

Anything that two people like and concent to is okay... oral, anal, bsdm (some people like that), anything. The only question is wether someone is emotionally and cognitivly mature enough to decide wether they really want to do something.

There's nothing "magical" about the age 18. How incredibly ignorant and biggoted to think that no one under that age should be able to decide what they want for themselves. People mature at different rates- some people might not be able to handle the consequences at 50, and some could handle it just after puberty. Of course, 12 year olds having sex can have serious consequences that can alter the rest of thier lives... it would be truely rare to find someone emotionally capable at that age. It's less rare than most people would think as the age increases. Many 15 year olds are perfectly capable to decide for themselves.

Marriage is just a piece of paper, it means nothing, except that you want to spend the rest of your life with that person. There's no need to spend the rest of your life with someone just to have sex with them, unless that is what you want to do. Therefore premarital sex is perfectly fine, as long as the participants are emotionally capable and concenting.

Gamer4Fire · Apr 2, 2002

If two adults who are not married want to get hot and heavy without being married... I'll beat you up if try and stop me. Who are you punks to say I have to be married before getting it on with my girlfriend? The marriage issue is ingrained in stupid christians who believe in their invisible friend who told them it was wrong. If they want to stop me, they can answer to my fists.

McFox · Apr 2, 2002

<blockquote>quote:<hr />Originally posted by Gamer4Fire:
If two adults who are not married want to get hot and heavy without being married... I'll beat you up if try and stop me. Who are you punks to say I have to be married before getting it on with my girlfriend? The marriage issue is ingrained in stupid christians who believe in their invisible friend who told them it was wrong. If they want to stop me, they can answer to my fists.<hr /></blockquote>No one's trying to stop you. We're simply giving everyone's opinion. If your opinion doesn't agree with someone else's, then ignore them. That's what I do.

Gamer4Fire · Apr 2, 2002

The point of my post was to sound emotional and to take the topic away from kiddie sex back into the realm of adult sex before marrige. Pathos is a good way to accomplish your task, sometimes.

SLaKKiCHu · Apr 2, 2002

<blockquote>quote:<hr />Originally posted by PorCorpWis:
[QB]There's nothing "magical" about the age 18. How incredibly ignorant and biggoted blah, blah, blah... <hr /></blockquote>The age of 18 is significant in a couple of ways...:

1) The age of 18 is considered to be the majority by the United States, meaning the person can be held wholly and entirely accountable for their actions. Any measures necessary can be taken in relation to child-support, etc.

2) I believe either Massy or LE (whichever it was, pipe up and get your credit. <img border="0" title="" alt="[Wink]" src="wink.gif" /> )gave me my concept of the month with a statement that went something like 'I(we) am(are)not in a position to make any significant impact on the topic at hand, and thusly I(we) am(are) not required to have a responsible opinion in the matter.' While that was hardly a verbatim quote, it is still something applicable to the current topic. Here's how:

While it is easy to assume that someone merely of the age of 18 is neither financially nor otherwise capable of raising a child optimally, be that the product of premarital sex, it is all the easier to assume that a child -under- the age of 18 is that much -less- suited to raise said child through his current means.

Having said that, it is also easy to assume that that same underaged boy or girl who wishes to engage in sexual activities, yet who is not wholly capable or prepared to care of a child of their own, is not responsible enough to make the decision to do so for the simple fact that they cannot aptly deal with every possible consequence of their actions.

<blockquote>quote:<hr />Originally posted by.. eh.. I forget his name. Same guy, tho...
Many 15 year olds are perfectly capable to decide for themselves.<hr /></blockquote>No, they are not, for the reasons stated above. They may believe themselves to be, but really.. 15-year-olds hang out at bowling alleys to play 'Rock-n-Bowl' because they're too young to stay late anywhere else. 15-year-olds still giggle about fart jokes and boys. 15-year-olds still walk or ride bikes to school because they don't even have licenses. Most 15-year-olds don't have jobs and rely on mommy and daddy to support them. -NO- 15-year-old has the mental and emotional capacity to fully anticipate and deal with the complications that can come from sex. To think so is incredibly ignorant and short-sighted.

That is just how it is. And while I won't say that 18 is a 'magical number', I'll say it's a pretty good minimum. Notice I said minimum. I'm 21 with no children. I'm not even ready for it and I -passed- the age of 18.

psychicpuff · Apr 2, 2002

Ummm....

What on earth is BSDM??

Gideon · Apr 2, 2002

<blockquote>quote:<hr />Originally posted by Gamer4Fire:
If two adults who are not married want to get hot and heavy without being married... I'll beat you up if try and stop me. Who are you punks to say I have to be married before getting it on with my girlfriend? The marriage issue is ingrained in stupid christians who believe in their invisible friend who told them it was wrong. If they want to stop me, they can answer to my fists.<hr /></blockquote>you should at least have SOME respect for Christianity... i mean come on, I try to show other religions and atheists respect. Even if you dont care at all about religion you should at least respect them.

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