My post wasn't intended to be humorous or exaggerated; I thought I was being depressing as hell and a total Debbie Downer.
Parallel to that, I'm scared of sitting in a corner feeling half-smug half-bitter watching non-competitive people rejecting custom specials, contributing to a factional pro-customs circlejerk in which we lament said non-competitive plebs for playing a game we consider less competitive. If the irony of this flies over your head, you have no idea how envious I am.
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The only custom that seems worth having a debate over banning is Explosive Balloon Trip, under the specific criteria that the pseudo-infinite camping it allows is pseudo-incompatible with our time limit
house rules, particularly at low level play.
Kong Cyclone is the next closest thing, because of how stupidly abuse it is
to inexperienced players. But it's not really a problem. This conversation might be different if DK was already an A-tier character without it, but he's not so...
Then we've got merely great stuff like Luma Warp, Zig-Zag Shot, Dark Fists, and Jumbo Hoops, but it's really, really hard to take anyone who complains about these remotely seriously. What, with Boost Kick, Needles, and Monkey Flip in the game, to say nothing of Sheik fair, Luigi nair, Ness b-throw, Falcon/Mac jabs, MK uair->SL, and what-else existing.
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People freak out when they see a move that makes them go "WTF."
This is, however,
the entire point of a good move.
We have a word for "honest" characters with no WTF aspects that break rules and push limits: low-tier.
But in the case of customs, this happens:
This is the second most important image I have ever seen. It encapsulates perfectly the ultimate challenge of human thought: classifying our observations correctly so as to generate rational thought. If nothing else, anyone who comes out of this with a better understanding of this pattern of human behavior is a big win for rationality.
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At the end of the day, the super obvious proof that customs are legit has always been "If there was no unlocking, and we could just select them on the CSS and use them in For Glory, we wouldn't even be having this conversation." We're literally only talking about this stuff because of
menu design.
It's not surprising; humanity has a long and bloody history of discriminating against far more for far less. (Hence, girls sucking at math) But if you give people a reason to adopt an irrational position, they will run with it.
The extreme and obvious example is slavery. If we grew up in a culture where slavery of some type was accepted, the vast majority of us would be varying degrees of okay with it. We certainly wouldn't be special snowflakes with temporally displaced perspectives who would lead the revolution, as much as we'd like to think so.
I'm not going to lie; if I lived in a society where it was socially acceptable and ordinary to want to ban Sonic, I would probably hold that position. Yes, it's irrational, stupid, and
objectively wrong. I'm glad that I, living in this world without that pressure, know better. But I know myself and know my rational weaknesses, or at least some of them.
We see this in our universe with Miis. Some people think Miis are stupid characters and want to ban them, to an extent that this is an opinion you can actually hold without getting thrown out of a dinner party. (Unlike other characters) And no matter how much I disagree, I
feel the gravity and emotional pull; part of my mind regards them as second class citizens. There's an alternate universe somewhere in which game characters are real and Miis are enslaved, to no objection of others or myself.
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I think the ultimate, long-long-term takeaway of all this is that competitive games require a comprehensive and enforced standard to ward off the corrosive effects of non-competitive johns on the environment. It certainly works for League of Legends.
And whoever says the words For Glory is getting stabbed.