How do you guys calm down while on tilt and nervous?

[nooga]

This happens to me a lot, been trying to just breathe but I'm so competitive and I hate losing lol

Any tips?

 

[Deft]

I read the fantasy series Wheel of Time and the main character was taught to control his emotions by imagining a small flame and channeling all his feelings into it until only a void remained.

 

[Deleted member]

i put the game down and i jerk off while i'm angry.

which is apparently not allowed by my friend's sexual abuser treatment center.

you're not allowed to jerk off when you're mad. by contract.

i thought it was hilarious.

 

[Twilight Emblem]

This is from my experience

Work to improve your health and well being. The better you feel in general the harder it is for you to take things the wrong way and the harder it is for you to get into a bad mood.

Get plenty of sleep. Eat a diet that is filled with healthy nutrient rich foods that is designed to peak your mental capability and be on an exercise routine. Drink enough water. Stay away from drugs and other stresses that make you feel bad every day. Learn to cope with stresses you can't escape from. Know when to take breaks. Warm up your hands before you play so you don't start running out of energy. Try to broaden your perspective. Even if you don't see improvement that doesn't mean anything. You could be a few games away or a few minutes of studying your errors away from discovering an answer that will make you better. So don't count yourself out ever.

That said make sure you're putting in a few hours a day to get better and make sure the purpose of those hours is being used in a such a way as to cause the most amount of improvement possible. If you aren't putting in work to get better you'll simply tilt when you get bodied over and over and that's not fun.

Exercise and proper food is really important to higher level play I think. Here is a guide that is good enough to make you more fit than most of the current population and the time commitment for doing it isn't very bad at all. This guide is smashboards tier when it comes to fitness and it weeds out a lot of crap.

http://liamrosen.com/fitness.html

 

[dRevan64]

you're not allowed to jerk off when you're mad. by contract.

This is completely off topic but that actually borders on being dangerous holy ****. It's called letting off steam for a reason.

That treatment center needs to reevaluate its methodology.

 

[Deleted member]

been saying that for a few months now. they also put you in this weird position where the treatment is considered "optional" and you can get out of jail in 6 months if you take it vs being in the prison for 5 years if you don't so it's not really optional in any way since it's so heavily incentivised compared to the alternative, but at any point if you say that you were falsely convicted then you're booted from the program. in my buddy's case, everyone pretty much knows he was falsely convicted, but he has to act the part of being a sex offender anyway. so the system basically goes out of its way to persecute these people to the fullest extent of the law regardless of severity to the point of mentally implanting their crimes based on a system that's faulty to begin with.

idk personally i think it's disgusting when parents raise their children as catholic or whatever, no child has the mental capacity to truly process what he or she is being involved in and i see it as perverted to press one's religious values onto their blatantly undeveloped children. it's kinda like that except subsidized by the state and much more damaging because the guilt and shame is assigned directly to the person. sometimes correctly, sometimes not. but really, do you want your tax dollars to put someone through 4+ years of a blame game? the whole thing strikes me as disgusting, but then so does the rest of the system really.

 

[Bones0]

been saying that for a few months now. they also put you in this weird position where the treatment is considered "optional" and you can get out of jail in 6 months if you take it vs being in the prison for 5 years if you don't so it's not really optional in any way since it's so heavily incentivised compared to the alternative, but at any point if you say that you were falsely convicted then you're booted from the program. in my buddy's case, everyone pretty much knows he was falsely convicted, but he has to act the part of being a sex offender anyway. so the system basically goes out of its way to persecute these people to the fullest extent of the law regardless of severity to the point of mentally implanting their crimes based on a system that's faulty to begin with.

idk personally i think it's disgusting when parents raise their children as catholic or whatever, no child has the mental capacity to truly process what he or she is being involved in and i see it as perverted to press one's religious values onto their blatantly undeveloped children. it's kinda like that except subsidized by the state and much more damaging because the guilt and shame is assigned directly to the person. sometimes correctly, sometimes not. but really, do you want your tax dollars to put someone through 4+ years of a blame game? the whole thing strikes me as disgusting, but then so does the rest of the system really.

No johns.

 

[Deleted member]

No johns.

no johns is a philosophy that puts one's destiny into one's own hands so that excuses can't be made. no johns is about placing personal responsibility where it is due. my rant about this particular situation is that unlike no johns where you can put in a positive effort for a positive outcome, all decisions lead to a no-win situation in a skewed and abusive manner. i don't think no johns fits here at all.

 

[dRevan64]

Taken as a given that the end goal is rehabilitation so that these people don't recidivate and harm anyone else. At a point it doesn't even become about the convicted here, this is relevant to people around them. Reducing sentences in a treatment program that's actively counterproductive is unspeakably irresponsible.

Dios mio.

 

[Varist]

This is from my experience

Work to improve your health and well being. The better you feel in general the harder it is for you to take things the wrong way and the harder it is for you to get into a bad mood.

Get plenty of sleep. Eat a diet that is filled with healthy nutrient rich foods that is designed to peak your mental capability and be on an exercise routine. Drink enough water. Stay away from drugs and other stresses that make you feel bad every day. Learn to cope with stresses you can't escape from. Know when to take breaks. Warm up your hands before you play so you don't start running out of energy. Try to broaden your perspective. Even if you don't see improvement that doesn't mean anything. You could be a few games away or a few minutes of studying your errors away from discovering an answer that will make you better. So don't count yourself out ever.

That said make sure you're putting in a few hours a day to get better and make sure the purpose of those hours is being used in a such a way as to cause the most amount of improvement possible. If you aren't putting in work to get better you'll simply tilt when you get bodied over and over and that's not fun.

Exercise and proper food is really important to higher level play I think. Here is a guide that is good enough to make you more fit than most of the current population and the time commitment for doing it isn't very bad at all. This guide is smashboards tier when it comes to fitness and it weeds out a lot of crap.

http://liamrosen.com/fitness.html

Not to step on your toes or anything but feeling bad can be a motivator just as much as feeling good can. All the generic "drink water get sleep eat food" stuff isn't really going to push anyone past some hurdle. Lacking one of those things can definitely be a detriment but allocating more resources there, if your real goal is to improve at competitive melee, would be an inefficient effort.

I would challenge the claim that drugs are "stresses" that make you feel bad everyday lol

Even if you don't see improvement that doesn't mean anything. You could be a few games away or a few minutes of studying your errors away from discovering an answer that will make you better.

This is a dangerous philosophy to have because it breeds complacency. There is no miracle secret to melee that is going to jumpstart your path to greatness once you "discover it". If you aren't seeing improvement, it's not because you need to just keep doing what you're doing and in a few games some answer will pop up. If you aren't seeing improvement it's because you aren't practicing right. Most of melee is just organizing knowledge and hammering in the basics. Looking for extra stuff or trying to discover a weird new trick is not really going to help you just because there is a large foundation of well-documented knowledge that is proven to make you immediately better at the game but remains largely untapped.

I largely agree with the next paragraph but I can't really relate with the tilt advice so I won't say anything against it. Getting bodied over and over just makes me want to win more. And usually I don't get bodied for too long, the more you play against someone the better you get if you're really trying.

I'm not one to diss getting fit or healthy, but I think it really has such little correlation with high level Melee that it isn't worth spending time on if your purpose is to get good at Melee. There are fat guys who are ****ing beast at Melee. There are skinny guys who eat like **** and over or undersleep and they're beast at Melee. Mango is a solid case for why you don't really need to care too much about maximizing your physical health to be good at Melee.




Advice for gay nooga in specific: If you're getting nervous during matches, it's because you're in a situation you are uncomfortable with. That is just something that is going to happen until enough time has passed. That will obviously vary from person to person. If it persists too long, medicate yourself.

If you're going on tilt and just playing worse and worse after getting bodied by an opponent, that's actually a super natural part of Melee. If the other guy is making you feel pressured and you're dropping your tech and not thinking clearly, he's doing it right. It just comes down to having a stronger will than the other person. Realize that not everyone who plays this game is going to be a winner. Are you a winner or a loser? If you're a loser you will continue to feel this way when a winner plays you.

This may sound like I'm trying to give you advice for your problem by just saying "fix your problem", but you asked a psychological question. The answer to mindset questions is rarely some tangible solution. You just have to have that mindset or motivate yourself to breed it in. Trying to placebo yourself into thinking more clearly with a "new healthier diet" or "disciplined sleep" will never be as effective as just recognizing your problem and willing yourself to fix it.

 

[Varist]

To everyone who has the same problem as OP, a lot of people don't really understand exactly how you should go about winning a fighting game. Fighting games are different from your regular competitive game. Think about something like a racing game. You're competing with someone else, but your keys to winning are knowledge of the track, using your controls properly, shaving off seconds where you can and only rarely do you come in actual contact with the other person's vehicle.

In a fighting game, the obstacle is your opponent. Anything that happens to you in the game is happening to you because they did it to you. Fighting games are more personal in this way, and it's easy to feel pressured by a conscious, thinking force that is actively trying to destroy you than by the next left turn you have to bust a Uie at.

Your mentality must be that someone is going to die at the end of the match and it isn't going to be you. It can never be you. If I'm about to play a match against you, there won't be a single feeling in my mind that has any sympathy for you. There is no part of me that wants you to win, I will not relate to you and I do not treat you as a fellow man, I treat you as something that I need to kill. Melee has room for only one victor (two if you're playing teams but honestly **** that).

You get 4 stocks. If you get bodied the first stock, and you give up the next stock for free because you're on tilt, you're playing like a ***** and you deserve to lose. Don't even entertain a fantasy where you're better than me but __x__ stupid thing happened. You let me get inside you like you're my ***** so you might as well get on all fours and suck me off after the match because you have no pride if you're going to let someone walk all over you in a video game. If someone bodies me the first match, I'm not going to roll over for them. If I feel like someone's in my head, I hit back and get in theirs.

You don't need to sabotage yourself. You have an opponent. Worry about them. Tilt cannot exist. People only care about winners. I don't care about losers. History doesn't care about losers. I wrote this post more to masturbate to my own words than to help you out, because from the sound of it you're a loser already and whatever advice these people give you is wasted.

Some people have winning mentalities, some people have losing mentalities. It's not worth it to fix people who are broken. They do that for themselves. You fix your mentality on your own. You do that for yourself if you have any sense of self respect.

Are you there to compete or are you there to be nervous?

If you have so little will to come out on top, that you keep mentally sabotaging yourself, then maybe fighting games aren't for you bud. Not everyone can be the victor.

 

[Bones0]

no johns is a philosophy that puts one's destiny into one's own hands so that excuses can't be made. no johns is about placing personal responsibility where it is due. my rant about this particular situation is that unlike no johns where you can put in a positive effort for a positive outcome, all decisions lead to a no-win situation in a skewed and abusive manner. i don't think no johns fits here at all.

I was joking (poorly, apparently lol). I'd hope no one would seriously try to apply "no johns" to the situations you were describing. The utter impossibility of the situation made me think of those stereotypical people that haven't had to work for **** or deal with tragedy their entire life so they look down on people in those types of situations.

 

[AP Renekton]

I put my music on and pretend I'm playing against a friend who's a little worse than me but chill about losing.

Also try beating off between stocks. Sometimes it puts your opponent on tilt.

 

[Deleted member]

Also try beating off between stocks. Sometimes it puts your opponent on tilt.

This is hilarious.

 

[rawrimamonster]

Eventually after playing for so long, you just learn to not let **** get to you no matter who you're playing. You'll start to think more instead of letting emotions take over the match for you. This is probably also where you'll start to win a lot more matches because you're able to react to the bull**** being thrown at you and apply counter strategies to styles you've collected mentally.

 

[DtJ SmithZzz]

smashboards in the year 2013

 

[Jethrotex]

I put my music on and pretend I'm playing against a friend who's a little worse than me but chill about losing.

Also try beating off between stocks. Sometimes it puts your opponent on tilt.

Oh man, that caught me off guard xD

 

[Kadano]

i put the game down and i jerk off while i'm angry.

Probably the most effective and natural solution. Too bad society is still screwed up and ridicules it. We Europeans always like to make fun of you flopmericans who love your guns and killing but get insane when kids show (perfectly natural and healthy) sexual behavior, even going as far as incarcerating ten year olds for consensually kissing a classmate. It’s still a long road from our status quo to a loving society without recurring violence and its wide range of negative effects (hatred, war, capitalism & slavery etc.), though.
We already had the 60’s hippie culture with “make love not war”, James W. Prescott’s amazing article and all that – why did we have to fall back instead of taking over more bonobo principles? What more than science basically telling us to do so to solve our problems does it take in a secular society?

To get back to the quote: From my experience and how top Melee players appear on stream cameras, I believe that you play your best when you are in a mindset with lots of love for the game (and life in general), curiosity and the top goal of playing your best and pushing the game to its limits. When I feel angry or disrespected, my main goal is to defeat the opponent, but I don’t have enough mental ressources to make wise decisions and play much more close-minded and repetitive, without actually perceiving my opponent.
I blatantly suck when I don’t feel love and curiosity. Sexual and loving actions deactivate your fear/hatred-braincycles and raise activity in love, cooperation and perceiving regions, and they are very effective at that.
I don’t think there is anything more effective, actually (but I’m always glad to be proven wrong).

I think the optimal strategy for me would be receiving passive anal intercourse. Prostate stimulation doesn’t make as tired as actual ejaculation and enjoying something together is always nicer than alone. This is certainly less practical, though. Haha.

 

[Deleted member]

We Europeans always like to make fun of you flopmericans.

Trust me when I say that I definitely bash the US more than you and your friends do. I'm trying to move out of the US within the year.

 

[dRevan64]

We already had the 60’s hippie culture with “make love not war”, James W. Prescott’s amazing article and all that – why did we have to fall back instead of taking over more bonobo principles? What more than science basically telling us to do so to solve our problems does it take in a secular society?

Probably because the 60s saw a pretty vast increase in violent crime at least in the US, not sure about Europe. But even so after said violence dissipated we've continued to become more sexually open, this generation far more so than the last etc. It's just happening a bit slower than it is in western Europe, and in all fairness you guys have been around longer.

Prostate stimulation without orgasm is relaxing? I'd think it would be the opposite.

Edit: The article you linked is interesting because of when it was written since that was indeed the only noticeable period in the last century or so that violence has increased overall, whether or not Prescott was aware of the numbers since he may have just been referencing anecdotes. Since the 90s it's dropped to pre-1960s levels the world over.

 

[Varist]

20xx melee players have anal sex in their hotel rooms before tournament sets

for the love of the game

 

[KirbyKaze]

I'm pretty sure that DoH has been doing that for years now.

 

[MookieRah]

Trust me when I say that I definitely bash the US more than you and your friends do. I'm trying to move out of the US within the year.

I know this is off topic as all get out, but what is your gameplan about escaping the US? I know a bit about the subject. Also, out of curiosity, where would you go if you had the choice?

On topic, I agree with Kadano on the whole "feeling good and loving the game" angle. I think it's real easy to look at M2K's latest performances and see that he is doing amazingly well, but that he also seems really happy. Compare that to say, Melee FC 6 where he looks like he is about to die due to stress, and it's very different. That; however, is only anecdotal evidence.

I second the notion of having proper health, eating and drinking habits, and all that stuff prior to tournament. I don't care if people diss that, it's dumb if they do. Taking care of yourself puts you in an ideal state, you don't want to unintentionally sandbag by starving, dehydrating, and sleep depriving yourself. It's common sense.

I will say that having a clear mindset and positive (yet reasonable) expectations can take you very far. Also, try having a strategy before you play anyone, even if it's basic. Preparing a strategy starts you off on the right foot/mindest, so it's always a good first step. As far as keeping your cool after a loss, well repeat the previous step. Calm down, run the previous match through your head, glean what information you can, and form a new strategy.

That said, I think a lot of it boils down to experience as much as anything else. Being able to keep your cool in stressful situations is a skill, one that can be trained. So by merely attending tournaments, playing money matches, or just matches where you have something on the line, you are increasing your ability to perform under pressure.

 

[Nessafile]

Noogs got out of his cave.

 

[Twinkles]

We Europeans always like to make fun of you flopmericans who love your guns and killing but get insane when kids show (perfectly natural and healthy) sexual behavior, even going as far as incarcerating ten year olds for consensually kissing a classmate.

Blame Puritans

 

[nooga]

Noogs got out of his cave.

implying i haven't already competed in and won every local in my area

 

[Varist]

what stops me from saying your "area" consists of 10 meters spanning outward from your bedroom

my locals are harder than your locals

why hasnt anyone called u nooba yet? its like nooga but better. u should change your name i think thats the first step to being a great smasher is having a cool name.

 

[ZaXXoR]

This happens to me a lot, been trying to just breathe but I'm so competitive and I hate losing lol

Any tips?

most of the best players in this game are there because they have a relaxed mindset and dont mind losing, try playing the game to have fun, instead of only trying to win, you're probably trying to do the same things that worked once over and over again or something simple as that, and ur frustration clouds ur perception

 

[V-K]

I thought Nooga was the best player on the planet, why does he need such advice?

 

[nooga]

what stops me from saying your "area" consists of 10 meters spanning outward from your bedroom

my locals are harder than your locals

why hasnt anyone called u nooba yet? its like nooga but better. u should change your name i think thats the first step to being a great smasher is having a cool name.

buddy, i've been called nooba more times than you have posts in this forum. it's the curse of having this name. also, ***** (incase that was censored it's the n word) frequently comes up as well.

 

[nooga]

I thought Nooga was the best player on the planet, why does he need such advice?

you better shut up this is a hypothetical post

 

[Zodiac]

Drop down and do 15 or 20 push ups

 

[Bacon&Eggs]

Probably the most effective and natural solution. Too bad society is still screwed up and ridicules it. We Europeans always like to make fun of you flopmericans who love your guns and killing but get insane when kids show (perfectly natural and healthy) sexual behavior, even going as far as incarcerating ten year olds for consensually kissing a classmate. It’s still a long road from our status quo to a loving society without recurring violence and its wide range of negative effects (hatred, war, capitalism & slavery etc.), though.
We already had the 60’s hippie culture with “make love not war”, James W. Prescott’s amazing article and all that – why did we have to fall back instead of taking over more bonobo principles? What more than science basically telling us to do so to solve our problems does it take in a secular society?

To get back to the quote: From my experience and how top Melee players appear on stream cameras, I believe that you play your best when you are in a mindset with lots of love for the game (and life in general), curiosity and the top goal of playing your best and pushing the game to its limits. When I feel angry or disrespected, my main goal is to defeat the opponent, but I don’t have enough mental ressources to make wise decisions and play much more close-minded and repetitive, without actually perceiving my opponent.
I blatantly suck when I don’t feel love and curiosity. Sexual and loving actions deactivate your fear/hatred-braincycles and raise activity in love, cooperation and perceiving regions, and they are very effective at that.
I don’t think there is anything more effective, actually (but I’m always glad to be proven wrong).

I think the optimal strategy for me would be receiving passive anal intercourse. Prostate stimulation doesn’t make as tired as actual ejaculation and enjoying something together is always nicer than alone. This is certainly less practical, though. Haha.

holy ****

 

[Nessafile]

I remember when noogs was the best in the world. Now he's the best in his local area. come on nooga.

 

[NTG]

...amazing