AtticusFinch
Smash Journeyman
Captain Falcon was bron in a log cabin he built...(Cough bump cough)
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Captain Falcon Jokes
- Thread starter Sandy
- Start date
- Status
omfgomfg
Smash Lord
Captain Falcon has two eyes!
pyroroth
Smash Journeyman
wtf? Is that supposed to be a joke? Captain falcon doesn't have eyes. Only nipples
crosser43
Smash Journeyman
captain falcon's suing Myspace for taking the name, that he owns all around u
Loyal2NES
Smash Rookie
-Mr. T would pity the fool, and Chuck Norris would roundhouse kick the guy for being a fool.
Captain Falcon would PUNCH and Knee them both, respectively, for their unjust treatment of fools. And then Falcon Kick the fool just so nobody could accuse him of playing favorites.
-Captain Falcon is a just and honorable man. And so, when he was asked to compete in Super Smash Bros, he (being the just, honorable, and wise man he was) came up with the clever "Blood Falcon" disguise so that Smashers would be fooled into thinking they had a chance at victory. All this "cloning" business is just a ruse so that Captain Falcon can PAUNCH in two places at once.
Captain Falcon would PUNCH and Knee them both, respectively, for their unjust treatment of fools. And then Falcon Kick the fool just so nobody could accuse him of playing favorites.
-Captain Falcon is a just and honorable man. And so, when he was asked to compete in Super Smash Bros, he (being the just, honorable, and wise man he was) came up with the clever "Blood Falcon" disguise so that Smashers would be fooled into thinking they had a chance at victory. All this "cloning" business is just a ruse so that Captain Falcon can PAUNCH in two places at once.
Waka_Waka_do_do_yea
Smash Journeyman
When someone tells a bad joke, Captain Falcon knees them.
He should show up here any second now.
*flies of stage*
He should show up here any second now.
*flies of stage*
residentevilrulz
Smash Apprentice
http://youtube.com/watch?v=PywhvMSm9FQ
I saw someone said something about the falcon crunch cereal? Check this video out lol. My bro and I made this. I should have posted this on smashboards ages ago
I saw someone said something about the falcon crunch cereal? Check this video out lol. My bro and I made this. I should have posted this on smashboards ages ago
lol
Wise words from Captain Falcon "do not fight for i will kill you like a small dog, but instead be patient like a monkey in a pinata hoping the kids dont break it open"
pyroroth
Smash Journeyman
What's that from? Kung pow?
Frown
poekmon
Roundhouse kick < FALCON PAWNCH.
pyroroth
Smash Journeyman
That movie was so great, weeeooooweeeooooweeeeeoooo!
D
Deleted member
Guest
Snafu
Smash Cadet
Isaac, Geno and Megaman were all originally in Brawl, but they were Falcon Punch'd so hard during playtesting that their data was erased from the disc.
The lack of new female characters? They're all far too busy waiting for Captain Falcon to call them, they have no time to Brawl.
The lack of new female characters? They're all far too busy waiting for Captain Falcon to call them, they have no time to Brawl.
Clai
Smash Lord
Captain Falcon tried to become more eco-friendly by riding a bicycle to work. This didn't pan out after the bicycle disintergrated after three miles.
A man in Manhattan was foolish enough to drive in Captain Falcon's lane when the Falcon had to get somewhere. Falcon Punches are now the unquestioned #1 cause of death in the Tri-state area.
Captain Falcon has a life membership at Gold's Gym. This isn't because Captain Falcon works out there, he just owes them after accidently crashing through several office buildings by running on one of their treadmills.
Captain Falcon asked for the knee to have a smaller sweetspot in Brawl so undeserving players don't get to experience the gift of manly awesomeness.
After an annonymous tipster told Chuck Norris and Captain Falcon that each of them called out the other, they met outside to settle who was the greatest human being. A single Falcon Punch and roundhouse kick connected in a display of awesome that blinded everyone that saw it. Captain Falcon had several broken ribs and a fractured shoulder. Chuck Norris shattered his leg. After two weeks of rehabilitation and flexing, they apologized and agreed that such roughhousing shall never happen again. They then proceeded to rip every single molecule of the annonymous tipster's existence.
Scientists had once tried to clone Captain Falcon. The plan was to infuse an embryo with pure man until its growth and development was complete. After three hours, the embryo started to wilter under the awesome and imploded, sucking every piece of manliness that ever occupied the lab until it simply dissipated. The scientists had to donate the embryo to a hospital and walked away ashamed. Despite there being no sense of manliness at all, the embryo developed and became a healthy boy. It now goes under the alias Richard Simmons.
A man in Manhattan was foolish enough to drive in Captain Falcon's lane when the Falcon had to get somewhere. Falcon Punches are now the unquestioned #1 cause of death in the Tri-state area.
Captain Falcon has a life membership at Gold's Gym. This isn't because Captain Falcon works out there, he just owes them after accidently crashing through several office buildings by running on one of their treadmills.
Captain Falcon asked for the knee to have a smaller sweetspot in Brawl so undeserving players don't get to experience the gift of manly awesomeness.
After an annonymous tipster told Chuck Norris and Captain Falcon that each of them called out the other, they met outside to settle who was the greatest human being. A single Falcon Punch and roundhouse kick connected in a display of awesome that blinded everyone that saw it. Captain Falcon had several broken ribs and a fractured shoulder. Chuck Norris shattered his leg. After two weeks of rehabilitation and flexing, they apologized and agreed that such roughhousing shall never happen again. They then proceeded to rip every single molecule of the annonymous tipster's existence.
Scientists had once tried to clone Captain Falcon. The plan was to infuse an embryo with pure man until its growth and development was complete. After three hours, the embryo started to wilter under the awesome and imploded, sucking every piece of manliness that ever occupied the lab until it simply dissipated. The scientists had to donate the embryo to a hospital and walked away ashamed. Despite there being no sense of manliness at all, the embryo developed and became a healthy boy. It now goes under the alias Richard Simmons.
PsychoIncarnate
The Eternal Will of the Swarm
Patinator
Smash Champion
And look how he ended up! You just can't perfectly clone Captain Falcon.
Collective of Bears
King of Hug Style
Chuck Norris wears Captain Falcon pajamas at night.
Vollo
Smash Rookie
yo mama's so fat they hired Chuck Norris to move her. That didn't work so they got Captain Falcon to do it. yo mama doesn't exist anymore. i am TRULY sorry.
crosser43
Smash Journeyman
rofl nice one
smashmaniac16
Smash Journeyman
mr. game&watch used to be fat until captain falcon falcon punched him
Bluerockworld
Smash Apprentice
- Joined
- Jan 16, 2008
- Messages
- 114
Wait, so Ganondorf is Blood Falcon?
pyroroth
Smash Journeyman
It would have been better if you said 3-D
SpitFire15
Smash Ace
Game & Watch used to be 3-D until he met Captain Falcon. It was then he became so scared he changed dimensions in an attempt to hide from The Captain. Turns out it didn't help.
Captain Falcon doesn't wear a watch; he decides what time it is.
Pichu, Mewtwo, and Roy weren't cut from Brawl; they were Falcon Pawnched so hard they ceased to exist.
When Captain Falcon was born in the hospital, he Knee'd his way out of his mother's womb and proceeded to Falcon Pawnch the doctor for considering to spank his bottom. Even as an infant Captain Falcon doesn't tolerate any homosexual acts, especially from a pedophile.
When Captain Falcon makes direct eye contact with any female, they are immediately impregnated. Falcon got eventually tired of implanting his seed into several colonies of women, so he simply put on a visor.
Captain Falcon doesn't wear a watch; he decides what time it is.
Pichu, Mewtwo, and Roy weren't cut from Brawl; they were Falcon Pawnched so hard they ceased to exist.
When Captain Falcon was born in the hospital, he Knee'd his way out of his mother's womb and proceeded to Falcon Pawnch the doctor for considering to spank his bottom. Even as an infant Captain Falcon doesn't tolerate any homosexual acts, especially from a pedophile.
When Captain Falcon makes direct eye contact with any female, they are immediately impregnated. Falcon got eventually tired of implanting his seed into several colonies of women, so he simply put on a visor.
pyroroth
Smash Journeyman
Captain Falcon does his own stunts.
bigknuxred
Smash Cadet
- Joined
- Jan 9, 2008
- Messages
- 26
Chuck Norris Learned everything he knows from Captain Falcon.
Kazydai
Smash Apprentice
You gotta admit...C. Falcon vs. Snake would be the manliest fight ever.
Silent Wolf
...
I'm not letting these boards turn into what the Melee ones did. -_-
I guess I'll have to make a sticky about this here too lol.
I guess I'll have to make a sticky about this here too lol.
- Status