You’ve probably noticed that I’ve been pretty positive for this. I’m a positive person, I like to see the good in things. But right now I’m gonna have to get a little negative.
The story in this game sucks ass.
And people will say Pokémon stories have always sucked ass. While they’ve never been high art, I will defend certain gens to the ends of the earth. Not this though. Oh no, not this.
Y’know how in the earliest gens, the story was just beat the champion? This is kinda like that, but with this weird, awkward message
crammed in at the end. It’d actually be kinda interesting if this game took a full classic approach and ditched story completely, leaving everything up to you. But no, they don’t do that! They constantly have Hop or whoever stop you to tell you some inane things. And while they stopped you way more in Sun and Moon, there’s a difference here. In Sun and Moon, there was a story. When they stopped you they had something to
say...mostly. Hau’s malasada rambles got tedious.
The game is 100% hyper focused on the gym challenge to the expense of almost everything else, that when a real story tries to creep in around the end it feels awkward because it wasn’t properly set up. And while it’s cool that the gym challenge is being treated as a proper sports event, adding some very rad world building to the Pokémon universe, the story ends up suffering because of it.
A minor saving grace I feel is the characters. Yes, even Hop. While not the best, not even by Pokémon standards, they are rather charming and I enjoyed their character arcs.
Hop going from a cocky kid 100% sure he’ll win, to a guy trying to find his place in the world after realizing his dream is unattainable is kinda compelling. And I liked how he constantly switched his team up, scrambling to find something that works. Bede finally gives us another douche rival, and him being disowned by Rose, assaulted by Opal, and being almost humbled is very funny. And Marnie’s just cute, I like how she’s not try hard edgy. She’s kinda rough, but that’s just her style, and she clearly likes you. Wait till these kids get older
. Not to mention Sonia going from bored assistant to passionate young professor. I do like the characters in this game and that made playing through this story a little more bearable. But Rose’s schtick really just annoyed me.
Outta nowhere in the third act he has a meeting with Leon. And this is bad?? I guess??? I mean, he’s holding up your champion match, but that’s not evil that’s just inconvenient. And then Oleana shows up like “
you’ll never get Leon out of his meeting unless you catch this security guard! Mwahahaha” where the hell did this come from? At least with the Aether Foundation, there were clear hints that some shady stuff was going on. Every once in a while Lusamine would crack this wicked smile, Lillie was wary of it, Gladion warned you of it. It wasn’t the most surprising twist, but it was still kinda cool. And to be fair we all kinda guessed Rose was evil, but what if for whatever reason you didn’t? This would come as a complete and utter surprise, and not even a good one. You chase this security guard around in a lame sequence, fight him a couple times (where Marnie cheers for you and it’s adorable but it’s still lame) and after some shenanigans you finally get to the tower. Where you have to fight a buncha employees while some discount Sonic Heroes music plays in the back. You get to the top, see Oleana’s been smoking that nut pack, and finally get to interrupt Leon’s meeting. And really, how do we know this is an evil meeting? They could be discussing his Wheaties sponsorship, we don’t know. You bare witness to some glorious png’s discussing a thousand year off energy crisis, and finally get Leon outta that sick, twisted, diabolical meeting. Rose does some lame evil **** that leads to an actually really badass boss fight. Not even kidding, the Eternatus max raid with the legendary wolves was really awesome I had a great time with it! Rose is arrested, some mess about the future, the end.
One thing that really annoys me is how they keep stressing the fact that things’ll get bad in a thousand years. Don’t get me wrong, we should work now to fix future problems, but come on. A thousand years is incomprehensible to most people. Their grandchildren’s grandchildren will be dead by then! If they said something like 50 or 100 years it’d be more understandable but a thousand? Chairman Rose can’t wait one damn extra day for something that won’t happen for a millennium??
And every time something cool happens, like wild Dynamax Pokémon rampaging throughout the streets, we’re always railroaded somewhere else. “You go on, let the adults handle this!” **** you! I wanna fight the giant Applin trampling the Honda dealership!
And I’m sorry, but I don’t like Team Yell. They were just annoying, and I know that’s kinda the point but they weren’t charmingly annoying. Team Skull does everything they do way better. The virgin Piers, the Chad Ya Boi Guzma. I know people like them and if you do, more power to ya. But they really didn’t do anything for me. Team Skull is still the best team in the series.
I legitimately considered if this story was worse than X & Y’s. XY has the AZ war stuff, which is rad, but sw/sh has some legit cool character development. I think i’d very slightly place this above XY, because I enjoy these rivals more than the Kalos lame gang. But that’s still not good. This is legitimately one of the worst stories in the series. And it makes me so sad because Alola’s story made me
feel things. I felt for Lillie, and her abusive upbringing. I was happy when she gained confidence, I was sad when she left. I felt for the trial captains, I felt for the kahunas, I felt for the bad guys! This game has basically none of that. This game is really all about the gym challenge, with some weird environmental stuff thrown in at the end.
During Sun and Moon’s credits, it shows a montage of all the characters we’d met and what they’re up to now. How they’ve grown and changed. During Sword and Shield’s credits it’s just a bunch of emblems from the gym challenge. That really says it all better than I ever could.
I’ve noticed a bit of a trend recently. The recent even numbered gens have bad stories, while the odds had good ones. Gen 5 good, gen 6 bad, gen 7 good, gen 8 bad. Let’s hope gen 9 is better than this mess.
The character designs are top notch though 10/10.