sit
pour glass of scotch
sip scotch
spit out and toss scotch
SUDDENLY, A FAMILIAR FACE APPEARS BEFORE YOU. IT IS THE WARDEN.
"ah. i see your ceiling has given away under the pressure of the abundant volume of nerf foam from the nerf foam factory upstairs."
HIDDEN BY THE ABUNDANT VOLUME OF NERF FOAM, HE FAILS TO NOTICE THE FOLLOWING:
>YOUR PICTURE OF CIVIL WAR ERA NICHOLAS CAGE LOOK-A-LIKE
>YOUR POLAROID OF ERICK HU
>YOUR BOTTLE AND GLASS OF SCOTCH
>YOUR MOPED
>YOUR DOMINOS COUPONS
>THE PUDDLE OF SCOTCH YOU SPAT IN THE CORNER OF THE CELL
>You decide you cannot bear the pressure of such extenuating circumstances. Swimming through millions of nerf darts, which do not offer the best traction, you begin to panic. Frantically, you dig to the bottle of scotch, chug the remaining 1,895 mL, and advance upon the warden in a frenzy. He tries to ward you off, but to no avail, as you swing the empty glass bottle at his head and strike him dead.
>Your efforts exhaust you, and the overwhelming smell of polyurethane and onset of aged single malt ethanol sends you into a deep swoon. Mysterious words come to you in a vision.
FIND ALL THE CRYSTALS. COLLECT THEM IN YOUR INVENTORY. DON'T LET POLICE OR PROPERTY OWNERS STOP YOU. YOUR QUEST IS A JUST ONE.
.....
>You awaken. A SEETHING MASS OF BEAKS AND FOAM LEANS IN THROUGH THE WINDOW. ITS MANIFOLD VOICES SHRIEK "GOOD MORNING, SLEEPYHEAD! YOU ARE LATE FOR WORK!"
What do you do?
>____________